What Am I

It might be worth mentioning that this occurred years ago when I was more naive and when there just wasn't the same level of detailed information that's available now. The current version of myself with the resources I have may have made a different decision in that scenario. Here's a link to the type of guide I wish I'd had: https://five-meo.education/risks-and-cautions/ If you scroll down on the page, there's both a downloadable and embedded copy of the excellent document "FIVE GUIDE" written by the credentialed and knowledgeable Benjamin Malcolm. Beyond detailing the contraindications, it's an amazing resource for 5-MeO-DMT information in general.

Wow, damn right I'd be interested. I just took a look and it's definitely the type of guidance I'm hoping for. It's always helpful to get poetic and insightful pointers from someone who's way further down the same road that I'm working up the courage to travel. Thanks man. It would appear you and I have similar past experiences, current interests, and future aspirations. For most of your posts, it's as if I typed them myself. Good luck to you soul brother.

I believe thinking can be fine when placed in the proper context and exercised in an appropriate frequency. It's as if the typical person is compulsively thinking 90% of the time and accidentally experiencing silent awareness 10% of the time. Rumor has it this state of affairs leads them to mechanistically tying their sense of self to the thoughts as opposed to the silent awareness. If this ratio could flip and a person could rest as the Self for the majority of the time, and use their mind intentionally while knowing it's just a tool to be wielded, that's probably closer to the natural state. Regarding your question about thoughts being used themselves as a tool towards liberation, I remember there are some traditions that do that. Mahasi Sayadaw of Theravadan Buddhism is one example. They use thought to continually mentally note the present moment, thereby leading them to that same experience of silent awareness beyond thought.

I've found inner body awareness practices to be the most powerful both during and outside of psychedelic trips. More specific than experiencing the feeling of your physical body, it's more so a continuous connection and alignment with the more subtle feeling of your own literal vital energy. I've known about this practice for many years, but it wasn't until I had a bunch of 5meo experiences that I could suddenly feel the real thing even when sober, which was quite a revelation. I'm sure it's related to the kundalini energetic aspects of 5meo. The power of this practice is in its simplicity. It's non-conceptual, experiential, and in the moment. You make the initial intention to feel it, and then from there you simply just continuously feel it by way of awareness rather than mind. When done correctly, it's effortless. Consistency in practice at all times is the key to meaningful transformation and growth. The sensation of the energy is like a guiding light that can instantly point a chaotic and wayward trip in the proper direction towards a state of being and presence. And of course, it has the same effect when sober. Like anything else though, it gets more familiar and easy the more you do it. If you get too lax in your attention and efforts, the full sensation can be difficult to find again for a time. Here's some lines from Eckhart Tolle's book, "Practicing the Power of Now": "To stay present in everyday life, it helps to be deeply rooted within yourself; otherwise, the mind, which has incredible momentum, will drag you along like a wild river. It means to inhabit your body fully. To always have some of your attention in the inner energy field of your body. To feel the body from within, so to speak. Body awareness keeps you present. It anchors you in the Now. The body that you can see and touch cannot take you into Being. But that visible and tangible body is only an outer shell, or rather a limited and distorted perception of a deeper reality. In your natural state of connectedness with Being, this deeper reality can be felt every moment as the invisible inner body, the ani­mating presence within you. So to "inhabit the body" is to feel the body from within, to feel the life inside the body and thereby come to know that you are beyond the outer form. You are cut off from Being as long as your mind takes up all your attention. When this happens - and it happens continuously for most people - you are not in your body. The mind absorbs all your consciousness and transforms it into mind stuff. You cannot stop thinking. To become conscious of Being, you need to reclaim consciousness from the mind. This is one of the most essential tasks on your spiritual journey. It will free vast amounts of consciousness that previously had been trapped in useless and compulsive thinking. A very effective way of doing this is simply to take the focus of your attention away from thinking and direct it into the body, where Being can be felt in the first instance as the invisible energy field that gives life to what you perceive as the physical body."

This warning is a funny coincidence considering the post I just made about the dangers of combining 5-MeO-DMT and harmalas lol. I'll take this to heart and do my due diligence in research. I have seen quite a few examples where people combine the 4-sub tryptamines with ketamine, so I think the safety profile looks a little better. Caution is always warranted though.

Ah nice, just watched it, good stuff. Thank you @Leo Gura for seemingly always having preexisting content (posts, videos, and otherwise) relating to whatever has caught my interest. Thanks man, this is helpful in making a decision. I'm guessing you must mean 5-MeO-MALT as opposed to the standalone MALT. Though I've heard some people like MALT as well. I wonder how the easier substances like AL-LAD and 4-HO-MET would mix with a small dose of ketamine. Maybe the slight dissociation and calming effect would help the mind get into the ideal state to best take advantage of their potential, without the negatives that can come from excessive amounts of ketamine and other dissos (an actual loss of conscious presence in my case). I've tried this a number of times with 5-MeO-DMT, and I'd say it was mostly successful. But I hear the psychs that mainly affect 5-HT2A receptors are more profoundly synergistic with ketamine, so I wonder how it'd change the trip for the substances that can sometimes be considered boring on their own due to a limited headspace.

I'll give this a try at some point and share how it goes. I've used 5-MeO-DMT a good number of times mixed with low doses of ketamine, and that was pretty interesting.

Good to know, a euphoric fun time is what I'm going for with the hope there's still at least some spiritual headspace. I'd love to try 5-MeO-MiPT. It's on my list for sure, but it seems it's not easily obtainable anymore. I hear some of the precursor ingredients were banned.

@Davino can you tell me more about your experience with AL-LAD? Did you find it worthwhile? The only lysergamides I've tried were LSD and HBWR seeds, and neither were great experiences imo. Anyone else who's used AL-LAD please feel free to chime in.

That's so interesting, and it's familiar to what I've read about other full kundalini awakenings. My understanding is it's essentially an awakening of your unconscious/superconscious into your conscious experience. That'd explain the wellspring of creativity, since your individual expression as Francis777 is now a more robust tap into the source of all things. If you're thinking the cause of your symptoms could at least partially relate to baggage in your subconscious mind becoming illuminated and more apparent, that certainly seems plausible.

Yeah, no doubt. If psychedelics are used properly, with spiritual practice and effort outside their use as well, they can bring out the best of you while helping purify the worst of you. A high dose trip of 5-MeO-DMT (especially repeated trips over time) has the tangible benefit of clearing your literal energetic system. The clearer it is, the more translucent your sense of self can become. You may find yourself having intuitive shocks of realization when sober that you're actually the very reality you're observing. It's very much an experiential thing and not a conceptual thing. I don't claim to be a master of any type, but that's how it's been for me. You may also get a badass experience like this:

Right, I can confirm this is not the degree it awakened for me. But I've heard of it happening in books, videos, forums, etc. I remember reading a post from at least one other member on this forum who also described it. I'm sure it feels like a curse now, but I sincerely hope it becomes a blessing for you later.

That's cool, whatever you'd like to share or not share is fine. To give a bit from my side, I experienced kundalini syndrome to a minor and intermittent degree during my first year of weekly 5-MeO-DMT use. It'd always happen for a few days to a week after usage. Especially near the beginning, I would have some pretty gnarly symptoms. It's like I was forcefully pulled into the moment to a ridiculous degree by a raw electrical energy I could feel throughout my body. That might sound cool to some, but anyone who's had the symptoms knows it's like an unpleasant and extreme fight or flight response. It's truly like tripping when sober, and the lines between them blur. During one especially difficult bout, my resting heart rate was ~140 bpm for 6 days straight and I had insomnia the whole time. It was not comfortable in the least. I'm pretty sure it has to do with an atrophied aspect of the nervous system that wasn't yet up to spec to deal with the increased demand of more life energy. Thankfully I adapted and that no longer happens. I bet if you can keep hope and stay strong, the same may happen for you one day. It sounds like you had one of those deeper kundalini awakenings like in Gopi Krishna's book, "Living with Kundalini". I must admit, I can't imagine what that would be like. But Gopi Krishna did eventually adapt. On a side note, most people in the 5meo community would call those reactivations. I don't think they realize it's actually kundalini syndrome. It was only when I had my first "reactivation" that I realized what it actually was.

Man, sounds like you lucked out on genes or whatever it is that determines a propensity to awakening. Some people just seem primed to pop without much external assistance. Sure wish I had that, but maybe you earned it in some way we don't fully understand. I'm with you on the importance of the groundwork and substances being a tool. That's a good point when you bring up recreational users being clueless about all things spiritual despite being immersed in it without realizing. It's definitely not a free pass.

Was yours due to psychedelic use?

It's interesting Taoism (and most of Buddhism for that matter) don't seem to teach a term and concept directly equivalent to kundalini, though they do teach about the vital energy associated with it. It seems to me that real kundalini awakening is a stand-alone mechanism itself, at least worthy of a name lol. Perhaps it's due to the potential dangers.

This is a cool video about kundalini. I find most of the content on this YT channel to be good.

I love this, really awesome insight. We're not dealing with a hack humans have created to modify their physiology in some unnatural way, but rather we're turning on and waking up inborn likely atrophied spiritual organs of perception. Why this is a mystery to the vast majority of society is anybodies guess, but it's definitely real regardless of not being recognized by modern science. I'd echo pretty much @Davino's entire post.

For me, most psychedelics are like an incredibly powerful and effective mental therapy session. But 5-MeO-DMT/MALT are in a league of their own in the sense they produce elevated states which are practically legendary throughout history. Having a legitimate kundalini awakening and going into full nirvikalpa samadhi will put your body and mind through a natural purification process that burns away your sense of individual self. Even lower doses using these substances seem to more or less trigger this process. It makes it much easier to have a spiritual practice outside of psychedelic use, which is where their true value lies in my opinion. It's like a helicopter ride to the top of a mountain. You're taken back down afterward, but it's so much easier to climb up manually when you have an idea of the terrain. And come on guys, no need to bully @Princess Arabia . I find her musings to be pretty accurate, and she has access to the same reality as us whether she's ingested drugs or not. Though I do agree psychedelics can be profoundly beneficial for the right person in the right circumstances. Certainly not arguing that.

Thanks for the suggestions. I did try 2C-B a few years ago and it's definitely easy on the mind, but phenethylamines in general just don't agree with me for whatever reason. I get a lot of tension and bizarre body sensations. I'm not really a fan of lysergamides either. Tryptamines have always been where it's at. I agree with your general philosophy of fun involving drugs being a borrowing of tomorrow's happiness today. I just think certain psychedelics have a way of bypassing the rule to some degree. Using pharma as an example, it's as if it would activate my own innate joy and bliss tied to my experience of Self, as opposed to something like MDMA which squeezes the serotonin and dopamine out of my brain. And my pharma hangover would amount to being ever so slightly fatigued the rest of the day, whereas I'm sure you know the horrors that MDMA can produce for days later. I'm starting to realize my answer already exists in the form of pharma lol. I guess I'm just curious what else is out there though.

I keep reading this as well. I guess it could be some superficial chemical quirk that causes the color to change.

This is definitely the one I have my eye on. 40mg seems way up there in terms of dose though. I'm thinking more along the lines of 10-20mg based on what I've read, but I guess experimentation is needed. Have you tried lower doses? Notice any significant difference between them?

Right, I guess it's true that psychedelics of all types are nothing to trifle with. If I kept the dose on the lower end using specific chems though, I wonder if it's possible to have a great time in addition to the life lessons and consciousness growth, while at the same time minimizing the chances of a "hyperslap". Something like 5-MeO-DMT has been so helpful for me, but every trip has been dead serious without any playful quality. I know it's possible, because most of my pharmahuasca trips have included ecstatic happiness and joy as a feature. Now I'm curious if any RCs exist where this outcome is more guaranteed.

I appreciate the interesting recipes, and I'm sure they're fun as hell and feel great, but I'm aiming more towards the semi-harmless tryptamine RCs only. In my experience, they're the least likely to drain away my own supply of neurotransmitters and leave me feeling hungover and shitty.