Agrande

Egostamina/Ego stamina/Ego-stamina 1. How much denial, repression and avoidance of the truth there is in someone and how much of it they're capable of. Especially how much people can project, antagonise, accumulate and be defensive without self reflection or introspection. 2. The time it takes during meditation or any other spiritual method to fully dissolve the self/ego. 3. How much nonsense and falsehood a person is capable of unconsciously constructing, to perhaps justify certain egoic survival ends, without facing the unknown. How long someone can be stuck in illusions and their capacity for self deception. Also how much you defend and get attached to your own constructions Example: "When someone is a victim for long enough, they might develop too much egostamina to ever change their ways. Instead, they'll start to take pride in being a victim. You'll find ways to justify being a victim." "During long meditation sessions, I realised how much egostamina was left in me. For the first few days, it was hell. But the ego eventually gave up" "When you start meditating hard, ego backlash might happen and you'll find out that you have a lot more egostamina because the ego tries to maintain homeostasis, the status quo" "The religious fundamentalists have inexhaustible ego-stamina, they just keep justifying more and more of their epistemically nonsensical actions." "Spiritually gifted people have a lot less egostamina which makes meditation, and psychedelics much more manageable" "When you have permanently exhausted your egostamina, that will be a huge turning point in your life and you'll finally be at peace with mostly everything. A big milestone." "You should NEVER underestimate your own egostamina. You are capable of being the same people you critique." "Survival extends far beyond just the avoidance of physical death. You have a lot of egostamina regarding religion, ideology, how you distract yourself, the way you think etc. your levels of egostamina are determined by how much you're attached to these things and how quickly you can accept the death of them. The psychological structure of survival extends into everything you do, you dissolve the structure by exhausting your ego stamina to 0." Why it is meaningful: The concept is meaningful or useful because it precisely labels when the ego is at work, and it is more precise than more general words such as pride, stubbornness and other similar words. It should not be thrown around generally, and it should be used precisely to accurately label certain mechanisms (constructing, confabulation, etc.) which the ego/self is capable of and when it is in action. Synonyms: pride, stubbornness

Truthmining; Incessantly questioning something, exploring and getting to the bottom of something to find more truth, insights and new knowledge. Like mining for diamonds and collecting them. A long, difficult and intensive grind. Eg. "I've been truthmining why my business is failing" "His lack of truthmining into himself makes him act in deluded, unconscious ways" "I've been truthmining into my social anxiety and I figured out it's rooted in certain childhood traumas I need to confront" "After truthmining for months, I've figured out the root cause of my health problem and I'm formulating a solution" Try using it

Since so much of our life is just maintaining our own survival, it’s a surprise for many that people go 180 degrees in the opposite direction and choose to end it on their terms. In a way, it takes a lot of bravery and courage, but in high pressure survival situations, it looks like the better option. What if suicide is just an attempt at survival in another form? Is suicide truthful? Legit i’m ready to die. It is also said that many had flashes of enlightenment when deep in this mire of suicidality. if the answer isn’t physical death then what is the real answer? Wouldn’t physical death lead to death of ego too? my outer circumstances don’t exactly let me pursue the spiritual path to the max the way I want to. I’d rather be dead then to live as this fuck up also in a fucked up deluded environment around deluded people i’m so sick of the BS in me and around me that i’d rather take a leap into the unknown and kill myself. Dissolving all this BS nauseating noise, shit and impurity

I used to have a hate boner for (pseudo) non dualists because they just play word games and riddles while pretending to be a wiseass that has all the answers. I still have a distaste for it because there’s a level of pretentiousness that comes with its followers. I don’t like parroters. I feel like pseudo non dualism is just for losers trying to cope with their loserdom. “I still live in my mom’s basement but it doesn’t matter bro it’s all non dual bro!!!” Since many obsessed pseudo non dualists plagued this forum I took a massive long break to refresh my mind from the BS. Reading all the pseudo non dualism was straight up brain damaging and cringe. if i see another one i’m done forever lol. i think real nondualists would be yogis living in seclusion and spending the whole day meditating.

Good message but easier said than done tbh. If i were to live like how you described, I’d need a fundamental shift in perception/consciousness. Which then would shift my worldview and how I view pleasures and addictions yada yada i’ve been doing something similar by doing contemplation work on the true nature of this world/reality Buddhist style. Got pretty useful results. I am a lot more detached from sex, porn, unhealthy eating and other vices. It’s more cerebral to do contemplation work but once u do it enough, the realised truths sink deep into your mind and naturally, you become averse to degenerate activities which waste away one’s life and health

Interesting answers thanks guys

Nibbana has entered the chat You would’ve died happy in Buddha’s time period if Buddha personally guided you to become an arahant.

I coin a new term: nondual word play

I gotta first purify my intentions tbh. Gotta burn through all my karma and cravings till it’s exhausted. Acting upon it would be for me doing long solo retreats with 5meodmt and other psychedelics + meditations on the side

Banger quotable too true

Good advice for socialising tbh. Turned off my head and just got into like social flow states. It’s not very useful for philosophy/spirituality though imho. Damn u also reminded me of that time I was so INTP I was asking myself “what if im autistic what if im autistic?!” So much so I got an actual test and it came out negative. There’s so much struggle with neurodiverse people I used to think I was just “wired differently” but rlly i’m just more of a thinker i guess

From what i understood ur advocating for like some sort of balance of ego and my spiritual side but ngl i’m more extreme i wanna go balls to the wall with things. I’d wanna COMPLETELY eliminate it (cause i’m like that). Also no hard feelings involved we’re just discussing I’m sorry if I came across as rude to you

That puts into perspective my past experiences of like having weeks of pure silence after some kind of awakening. Had a deep feeling of I am and “holy shit I actually exist and everything else exists?” But im sure there’s something deeper i’m missing here. Even Leo himself said that nobody is near the high level to teach entirely overcoming self deception. self deception has it’s tentacles possibly everywhere tbh

I see but then high level buddhists would’ve been totally free from self deception. It can’t be said for certain that just stopping thought leads to freedom from self deception. Maybe partially but not fully. What if it’s meant to stop the CAUSES of thinking? The cause of thinking imo is the desire to know or to look for certainties. What is ontological self deception? Is it God’s desire to know/experience a certain limited form and to get lost/immersed in it? By ultimate solution I mean complete freedom from self deception including at the ontological level not even the level of thought. removal from the root level. My current understanding is that I would have to return to God’s purest state to end all of this. Before all the distortions, forms, limitations etc. default state before any form manifested into existence. just one ball of massive infinite potentiality or void Insane work needed for that though. Had glimpses maybe. I was in states before where I could think of something and it would happen. But then I couldn’t sustain it.

I don’t want to be a deluded ignoramus