BojackHorseman

I'm not saying they shouldn't. Or that there is literally no point in reading them. But wouldn't it make more sense to read newer books that build on those plus everything we've learned since? In any other categories than the ones I'm talking about in the title of this post, things are usually considered to be evolving with time and we get more knowledge with newer things (obviously it doens't need to be THE most recent stuff literally). But in religion or spirituality for example, there is this aura (even for myself) of "this books is so ancient, so exotic, so revered, it's a must-read". So for example : why would you read The Bible today? I admit I didn't, but I don't think I'm wrong saying it's probably hard to read and kind of convoluted, for whatever message you can learn of it, which could probably found anywhere else. Now clearly I'm focusing on information here. But maybe there are other benefits that I don't get. Sorry if all of this seems stupid (I am), I was just asking myself that question, wondering if I needed to read some books I had on my list. (but it also clearly is some form of procrastination I'm doing here, even tho there might be a few interesting points to get out of this)

I don't know but I can draw conclusions considering my experience. As I was saying, simply smoking pot gave me the absolute worst, hours long panic attack, I thought I was gonna die. And I learned nothing from it. I was already anxious before but I think my panic attacks I had since came after that experience. I think I've read somewhere that it can't be too good for some mental disorders like the ones I self-diagnose, but maybe I'm wrong, browsing for infos now.

Good point. But there is also no way to tell if the states you end up with whatever psychedelics are not some kind of foolery of your brain, as much or more than how most people perceive reality is (and it certainly is, I agree). If there are so many things that can affect our brain and body in a negative way, there are chances that psychedelics might do too and gave a wrong vision of things instead of one that's closer to whatever truth. But nobody can prove that one way or the other, so...¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Certainly, "do what you will" is the one answer that solves everything in the end. I guess I also can't imagine the effects of psychedelic unless I try them. I guess too bad cause clearly I know how it will end for me if I do

Funny But if that is actually something you believe in, wouldn't it be more fair to say that real life is an escapism from other/higher states of consciousness (the ones you use drugs to access)? That being said...I just thought you could pretty much say drugs are just a tool like any other to go through life (maybe not just the right one for me). As long as, with any other means or tools, people do not get addicted, stuck, or extreme with it.

Who's to say depression is not more realistic than people being happy or enthusiastic? The older I get, the more I feel like I cannot bear people, feelings, all the conventions, being happy for the same things again and again. I feel like I'm very lucid tho. But everything just feels bad and annoying. Looks like I'm getting worse instead of getting better as I'm aging. I don't want meds. I think I'm just weak and whiny. Also, I've read many experience of meds making people kinda worse.

I mean...I love women. I love sexuality. I love sex, beautiful, smart women. I love females voices. But... I can't help but be aroused by women. I'm listening to this spiritual teacher right now and as much as I actually care and listen about what she says, I feel weak when I see her beauty. I also can't help but imagine having sex (not literally, more like a physical thing) when I see a woman. Uuuh I hate myself. On one hand everybody thinks about sexual thing, on the other hand I know the situation of women must be really hard to live, being prey to all those men, staring and all. I feel ashamed yet I also sometimes feel like I shouldn't be ashamed to look at beauty? (i'm not insisting by any means or harassing or whatever, never ever) I love and hate this sexual energy. Edit : sometimes I don't even feel like it's sexual I guess? Just feeling "weak"? Not sure how to explain it.

So I was watching Owen Cook's latest video. I'm not sure lately how many time I was about to unsubscribe to his YT account. Partly because the marketing part is annoying (not saying he shouldn't push his product, but sometimes I feel like it's a bit too much and gets on my nerve for some reason), but mostly because he's talking about ten thousands of dollars parties, some sort of value race, etc. I genuinely learned things from him and there's still even a tiny bit of very interesting thing in his videos, enough to make me keep on watching them, but the kind of stuff I was talking before, I don't resonate with. Granted, one part of me is in a "loser" mindstate. I was a nerd my whole life, and not even a smart one, just a pop culture/art jack of all trade/master of none. But even as I get kind of nonchalant towards life these days, which doesn't make me wanna grasp for any kind of success, I'm still wondering if living a life of "parties, money and hot girls" (just quoting the usual here) kind of turns me off because it's stranger to me, or because I've just gaven up on it at some point (just a reminder that I am now over 40). Is it weird to not want money (well, not much more than enough to keep me afloat)/lots of social interactions/an rich dating life? I'm no monk either, maybe just very introverted and happy with consuming other's creations. But I was wondering if having some kind of adventurous life was something that actually develops the soul, and if I was missing on it, or if some people were just not meant for this (not in a "you don't have the skill for it" kind of way, more as in "life has many types of roles to fill, and this kind of role is not mine"). Sorry, tired and I'm having a hard time expressing my thoughts in english tonight, but I had to get that out. Not sure if I'm a quitter that should motivate himself (even to smaller scales, maybe just getting a few more hundred bucks with my art skills for instance woud be enriching to me all the same that it is for people like Owen to swim in million dollar industries and whatnot), or if on the contrary I should stop thinking that maybe I'm missing out on something, and the way for me to live happy is to let go and just keep on floating peacefully with my close ones (and maybe go through the baby road, even if this is a very hard question for me, for various reasons)

Who said I fapped and used po- Ok I do But not sure I wouldn't be fascinated by the beaut and presence of women in general even without that I meant like...I don't imagine the sex, I just feel some attraction Yeah weirdley formulated

I get what you mean. I've wasted my life debating with people and looking up solutions, alternatives. On one hand, I think that is what I am. That my brain or something deeper actually needs this kind of stimulation. I don't think I'm relly looking or someone to tell me what to do tho. I'm just looking for pieces of the puzzle and chosing the ones I miss. So many human experience can only lead me to better things, otherwise I wouldn't be here. I think it's a mix of both. Reading and talking, and then experiencing. Granted, I'm certainly not doing the second one neaaarly enough. Not sure if it scares me. Or if I deep down I don't believe in myself and just distract myself with pretty stories and concepts. But yeah. I fucking need to stop my adhd brain for one second and take back meditation and whatever other kind of more personal studies I could find to feel better. Cause clearly I'm in a hole right now. PS : sorry if I'm not answering some other posts. Sometimes I just don't have more to say but appreciate the infos and experience.

Clearly aliens could be operating on a way that we would never be able to conceive or understand. But when I say physical, there's no hidden meaning here. I'm talking about moving bodies as we know them in the materail world as we know it. So when you were saying aliens wouldn't need to travel in the same way we've been imaginating (ships, etc), my question was : ho would they travel then? If travelling is about being present on Earth. Maybe they could just sense lifeforms and "teleport" (to simplify) there, who knows. Maybe they can be at many places at once, maybe just having an image or an object from a planet allows them to be there tho. I don't really know and my imagination or scientific knowledge is less than childish, I'm really just trying to understand what other meant of travelling, aka going from one physical place to another, there could be, rather than the stereotypical alien ship travelling space.

Hopefully I'm wrong and something incredibly new and hindsightful will come out of this book, but I'm betting some points of the tl;dr are just the usual : - exercise - eat healty - hydrate - sleep enough - avoid anxiety (harder one for me) (oh and obviously no smokes, alcool and other drugs, but I guess that's pretty obvious) Tbh I don't see how not doing all of those isn't just the best way to live the longest life you can, minus diseases and stuff you can't do shit about.

Not good. Lacks a lot of things. Too much sugar. No need to go that extreme. Veggies are essential and you won't get all the nutrients, proteins and carbs you need with just fruits. There's not point in doing it afaik.

Aren't they tho?

I guess it doesn't matter (you can come and go through phases I suppose? I'm hetero cis myself but I guess you can), or rather it does if you feel better like that and you're not lying to yourself?

So ailiens are non physical? Are we still talking about material beings from outer space? If so, and if "travel" is used in the traditional sense we know, you have to move form one place to another, right? Oh but maybe you mean some kind of teleportation technology?

This post made me laugh It's so angry it almost seems like some sort of trolling or experiment, I don't know. (Obvously I love what Leo is bringin in general, but as it is the case with people you know IRL even, you can love a person overall but still laugh or be surprised by things they say/think at times) Has this term of alien been brought up in Actualized's videos? What does this even mean, aliens as in, the conventional use, from outer space? Or could it mean something else.

For me it's bipolarity/depression/adhd But also lazyness And uncertainty bout how to use my time, which makes me panic and feel like a deer in headlights.

Oh he really is a good human to me, that's for sure. It's just that you can resonate with some parts/talk in some people, but feel kind of icky about some other parts of what they say. I just had to remind myself here that it's not because he taught me things and I now carry a bit of himself in me, that I have to try and accept everything he's saying, or try to apply it for yourself. That's pretty obvious and every smart teacher including himself does remind us not to just take everything they say for granted, but as it is the case for many things, it's easier to think this and say it, but not always to actually apply the advice to yourself.

I prefer Batman. It's a crime movie where a man is turned into a bat.

One is so impossible to chose... So I'll cheat and make it to 5, sorry Stalker : incredibly spiritual movie that has a very specific sense of time (it's around 3 hours and veeery slow at times, but that's part of the point, introspection etc) I rewatch it once a year, and it still feels like a mystical experience to me, I wouldn't recommend it to a lot of people tho. Everything everywere all once : The balance between absurdly funny, action, mystical and basic human relationships is so good. If makes me cry to twice in theaters. Rare that a film can touch my soul so deeply on existential matters. Can't wait to rewatch it. Whiplash : The raw anger and competitivity ends up in a non-conventional explosive finale that leaves you on edge. Kids return : Incredibly nostalgic japanese movie from Kitano. Not nostalgic as in, namedrop/copying the past like they do today, more like, people reflecting back on their lives. Sad with a smile. And eeer...the latest movie might be a Tarantino movie but not sure which one. Or maybe a Kurosawa one.

I do not perceive myself as such, but thank you very much, this feels good to hear I've never watched a Tim Robbins video But to "who else would follow his insanity"?, I would say, people that had lots of problems socializing, and/or cis men having trouble communicating with the other gender. He literally unlocked things in me that made me break 30+ years of celibate and virginity. (Edit : well, him and other teachers I was following at the same time I guess) I think his very outgoing energy balanced something in mine. Granted, I never ended up being some sort of player, but I learned enough to push to cursor a bit more on the "social/talkative" scale, enough for me not be a recluse that was way too stuck in his head to even having small talk (I was talking about women, but some of his advice/videos also help some people getting out of their head and talk more easily)

Yeah, not taking away for his many qualities, but the way you describe Owen does seem pretty accurate. Maybe some parts of what he's saying should just catter to specifically ambitious/high energy people. Clearly I shouldn't be chasing that level of ambition. Now as for chasing a lower level of ambition (maybe even just personal projects, not chasing money)...that's a more personal question I guess, that only I can answer. But I feel like it could be a good thing. I did work a bit for some people on some projects at an ultra tiny scale, and it was actually very absorbing and new to me. The fact that I'm asking questions in this regard is probably enough of a sign to tell me that, as much as I genuinely like reading, watching, playing, part of me does need creation. Just need to find out on what level and strike a balance (ADHD makes it hard to only focus on one thing)

I think I recall you saying you believed in ESP or something like that? (I might be wrong, I have a terrible memory) Do you think those are different from magic? I'm wondering, if both exist, if they're using the same "energy". If both would come from us only in the end. Nobody knows I guess. Also thanks everyone for the sources and thought material! Could watch everything yet but lots of interesting things.

I'm very drawn to this, I actually listen to some podcasts, read a few books...but I can never seem to start. I don't know if I like the idea of being some kind of weird bookworm and being special more than actually practicing the various crafts that could be linked to...let's say chaos magick. I think it's also hard for me to stick to ritualistic stuff as someone with ADHD/lacking patience in a way, also not liking relying on "greater forces" (I know all forms of magic might not do this, I'd just have to dig for which ones, b ut at the same time I feel like maybe you cannot give power to all of this if you just do quick things ?) Do any of you practice this? Do you actually believe it influences reality around you? Or is it just some kind of fancy self-motivation? If that's the case, why not just...motivate yourself in simpler ways? Or is it just some kind of disguised philoshophy teachings? Why do we (people that have some kind of faith in magic and other occult practices) feel like it's still logical to believe in this rather than acting like we do with other things, in a "Logical"/"rational" way? Shouldn't it be the work of some practictionners to show "proof" that all of this is not just a big roleplaying game/disguised philosophy/psychology? Some people will probably say we don't know everything and science does not either. But in this case we can just suppose anything? What gives an old magic book more legitimacy that me believing there is a flying cat god observing us in the sky? Please not that, as the beginning of my post says, I'm still actually fascinated by all of this. But the fact that I'm trying to tear it appart does not change this, on the contrary. It means that I care (otherwise clearly I'd also not talk about it here, I'd just laugh about how ridiculous practitionners are a self-centered materialistic forum) To finish this post : if you know of any particulary interesting people discussing those subjects online in one form or another (can be woo woo I'm a fairy, or a more dry, skeptic approach), don't hesitate to share.