Sabth

My life should be upgraded to a newer kind of things. Higher quality everything. Camera laptop etc. Idk. I should have had my art studio. But now.. before even that happened my collections are already stolen.

Idk I should have worked since I was young .

When I get older I no longer use pencil box : This is the last "pencil box" that I have, that I use to put my camera in it. As I no longer needed a pencil box. When its new (2013) Idk I used to be an artist Nah I love film making and photography. But then.... my broken childhood cameras

Some more things from my childhood.

My life should only be richer with age , but

I wanna be surrounded by high quality arts. Original works and achievements. Idk

Reminds me of my childhood.. But these days, I m with these : Idk~ Idk. Am I regressing? I want to have a new camera, new everything. Maybe I should get back a degree. Now that I'm no longer doing anything . I will graduate when I'm 33. 🤭

My life should be as high quality as this pic.

.

There was a drawing that I draw referring to this when I was sixteen. All was stolen in 2022. Ten years later. And I don't have a pic of it. Others I do have. But not all. Only some.😔 And pictures aren't the same as the real thing. 🖤

No but they are so good. At expressing themselves.

Taemin's costume reminds me of myself a year before , when I wear this because I don't have a face mask yet. So I just do whatever ~ When this song came out, it reminds me of myself. 20210518 20200227

20200227 I was 24 years old. My life is already falling.

You know synchronicity. They are making these songs for God.

This is from two years ago but I felt like my mood is like this :

I have a lot of writings. A really good hand writing writings. Books upon books. I have a lot of diaries. When I was a teenager and adolescent. I never kept my flow down.

18 year old.

All of these stuff in this box I haven't opened up since I was a kid. It has been years. Idk. While I want to keep all my arts

I do a lot of math in my childhood notebook. And other childish stuff. Personality types and month of births etc. colours. You haven't seen my university notebook. It was way way way more matured and compact. I miss all those , all are stolen.

Hospital bills , broken mp3 that I use when I was young. Library stickers (more stickers) This is just a little of what I had from my early childhood. There was a tons of drawing that got stolen. From when I was eight. And writings. But most importantly when I was a teenager. I have a lot of arts. That's what I do.

More notebooks and stickers and magazine . Some origami papers and origami bird that I did when I was young. Childhood storybook, calendars , timetable. Pictures, receipts , some toys,

Surprisingly, there is one of my earliest (not earliest) diary that I have when I was a child , was left Childhood pic with a barbie Some boxes of my earliest (first) camera and first phone Samsung Galaxy s III & Sony cybershot , And some jewellery box , and a watch box ,

This is my childhood box that had been infested with a rat in my dream. I better bring it to my new room before it gets infested in real life too. Before this, I just left it in my original room with all the memories around. Because I had been robbed , I think I had nothings left. I wanna be in the next room. I no longer want to live in the room that I had nothings left. I wanna kill myself. So there are a few things of mine left in that room. Idk. Let's see why this box is valuable. That it become the target of the mice ; 🍭💗🌷 some notebook from when I was young. a collection of stickers that I share and collected with my friend,

I sleep for just a little while. Maybe for less than one hour- 50 minutes. 6AM-7 And I got a dream. It was so disheartening and scary. I don't know what to do. I open the front door. And there was a group of mice come in. I really hated it. In real life, we do have this type of pest. But only above the roof. It didn't went inside the house. It's all above the ceiling. We can hear it but never seen it. We have call the pest control. But it live there for years. Sometimes it's gone and sometimes it came back. But in this dream, I open the door and it came in a lot . I was really helpless and I feel weak. I want to kill them. But couldn't. I don't have a mice spray. I only have a cockroach killer. So I use it to spray on the mice. In front of the door. But sadly, it didn't kill them. Didn't work for mice. I was already sad. And I do my best by closing the partition to prevent it from getting into another area of the house. I was really helpless. Then my mom came back home, and my brother, with his wife and wife's family and certainly a newborn(😱) and my father, they just came in. And I'm still sad about all the mice that I have let in. Hopelessly telling my mom to help. And she hold it. Surprisingly my sister and my mom aren't scared to catch it with bare hand. So they did. And in the end, one rat was stuck in my box. As I opened it. One was left in it. I was sad that now my things had been infested with rats. I'm sad. But there's nothing that I could do. This dream is more like giving me a helpless feelings where I couldn't do anything anymore. I was sad. But it's not scary either. Just hopeless. I hate rat. Maybe it was because I sleep with all the lights on.

2024/03/24 6:42AM 130k Day 14