theleelajoker

Don't get what you mean. How is it putting up defense? How and why only thing to penetrate? And contemplation means for me "thinking", for instance with a question like "who am I?" --> leads to only thinking. What I do is sit, walk, lying down etc and just feeling & obsverving

+ 1 for body, movement, breath I don't do contemplation + self-inquiry, this keeps me from action. Seems like a detour for me. Action, interaction= key for me for integration and evolving further

My take: Living, action is the unwinding of energy. You're just more aware/ more open during mediation. Meditation is training camp, real life is the playground. Goal is to bridge the gap between "meditation" and "living everyday life". Integration means you keep the openness and flow of energy all the time.

Haha yeah this enlightened game 🎮 🤣 Or the "I understand reality better then you" competition 👀 Seems pretty big also on this forum, it's the spiritual version of comparing dick sizes. Tbh, it's not a surprise given how Leo talks about how he's more awake then anyone else. Personally I trend more towards Alan Watts perspective - "unconscious people are so deep into the game, you have to admire that" 😁 Although I play those games myself as well from time to time it's entertaining 😉

Yeah, it's very strange. Changed - or higher - state of consciousness also gave me more attention from women. It seems I'm suddenly more funny, better looking and in general more attractive. Just like that. But guess what? Does not apply to the one woman I would love to get attention from. And it seems impossible for me to change that. Does this bother other women, even when they know about it? Noooooo, not at all! For some strange reason they now want to date me more then ever 🤣 So, I fear that this will drag out until I finally accept that I can't have this one woman in my life. And I bet as soon as I accept this, moved on and maybe even have a new girlfriend, then she will get interested in me. So the right strategy would be to forget this one woman as soon as possible, because then she might get interested in me and then all would be good, right? But it doesn't work this way. Because first, good luck trying to forget something on purpose. And second, it indeed seems that the dream is reading me - and forgetting her to get her is what I want so I won't get what I want. Checkmate.

OK. Makes more sense for me now. Thx for clarifying. "Being yourself" doesn't work for some guys, ok I get it. Maybe I am/ was lucky with some life circumstances out my control. But trust me, I have / had enough other shit do deal with. Where I am coming from is that IMO any measure, any training, any concept, any pick up strategy, and especially any meta analysis of "how women are, what women want etc, how to get women" gets you further form this masculine confident vibe, which is "being yourself" in the end. And ironically, once you manage this, you get more interesting for others. Because they can be themselves too. Moreover, living this authentic self is IMO also the key to a fulfilled life and much more valuable then "scoring" with some women. I believe the key is not to learn new strategies in dealing with people, but "unlearning" the conditioning that keeps you from your authentic self. At least that's the way I approach life right now and I like the way my life is trending...

Whatever makes you happy

Don't know how often I have to repeat it: First: Looks= a bit above average based on external feedback. Don't go to the gym to get muscles or similar. I once used tinder for a few weeks and stopped because I got close to zero matches. I won't stick out in a crowd. Noone will tell a girl dating me "oh why him?" but also nobody will say "oh what a catch" Edit some time later: my sister said re looks that I am more handsome then I think. Still don't believe it's as important as many people want it to be Second: re "very tight game" - I don't call it that, I don't act this way, I don't think this way! I don't work on impressing girls (anymore) although I was partially in this trap a bit when I was younger and more insecure. I don't think about getting "results". I don't think about "social status". WTF is wrong of many of you guys? Are you robots running on programs? Strategies to manipulate other humans? Stop thinking meta on how to influence people and just go out and talk, share, connect. Just be nice, be authentic, be open and treat others the way you want to be treated. Respect the individual man/woman in front of you. Try to find a "win-win". Share your happiness when you have a good day and share your sadness and desperation when you have a bad day. First case you lighten up life of others, later one you alllow others to feel what we all feel from time to time. Holy shit please all of you stop with the whole pick up mindset you are fucking up your life and the life of others just because you're scared of being yourself @Princess ArabiaI agree on people experiencing it differently and then projecting.

You need witnesses? 🤣🤣🤣 I'm far from wealthy, a bit above average looks I hear. When I am in a good mood I can connect to people, but that has not always been the case. The key: sense of humor, being as authentic and honest as possible, listening, being open. And having a big sister helps big time, too bro. Women know other women well. They often just don't know themselves well. Same for men.

+1 a thousand times So many people in this forum seem addicted to their projection and ego stories. All this shit about "women do this and that" and "men should this and that". It's an individual, unique person in front of you. Good luck. It's a mirror game

Not true, it's projection / subjective experience. Experienced the opposite many times. Got asked for my number, asked for a date, got approached at a bar, club, girls searching databases to find me when I was a colleague. After initial phase, women organized vacations, rented flats etc etc.

Damn But was worth a try & thx And I agree with the cues in the initial phase. When the girl laughs even at my bad jokes I know she likes me 🤣

Don't think so she has a long term boyfriend and seems happy about him. I like her but I'm not sexually interested and I think it's the same for her. IMO, it's possible to have a platonic relationship with the other sex. @Princess Arabia what if there are mixed signals? When the obvious points towards one direction, and the subtle cues in another direction? Case study: woman says in one situation "I don't have enough feelings for you let's part ways" (obvious) and in another situation tells a story where a woman she knows left her boyfriend but came back few months later (subtle). Or woman says she's not ready for relationship (obvious) but very casually brings up topic of marriage / kids in other situation (subtle)? She's seeking distance "I want to be alone" (obvious) but then is surprised when her wish is granted ("thought we talk about it", subtle). All real life examples Really curios about female perspective now

It changes. Once I broke through some initial blocks, I can feel the presence of "something" in almost any interaction, sth beyond the images. It's like never feeling foreign again, it's feeling at home wherever you go. I can relate to almost everyone automatically, it's just happening when I interact with presence. Within minutes, or few hours, I reach a depth of conversations with new people comparable to the depths I used to have with friends I have known for years. Respectively, new people reach that depth with me, it's teamwork. There's are countless methods to move towards this. Easiest path IMO: Be open to anything. Feel. Increase your capacity for feeling. Be present. Act, interact, share. Turn attention inside your body. Openness, as @Breakingthewall often points out, is crucial. Whatever increases your openenes, do that and I am confident that it's enough. .

Yeah reflecting on it now, I aim to be as practical as I can be about what one might call spirituality or "enlightenment". So you are awake, now what? What's next? Whatcha gonna do? It's all about action here in this plane of existence, experiencing. There was an old trip report, basically saying "life is about feeling good". You could rephrase that to living a "fulfilled life", knowing eg that all emotions are part of it, embracing sadness instead for only aiming for happiness. Which then transforms sadness into someone desirable, which makes you feel good Transcending material stuff did not give me fulfillment. Going deep into the material world did not do that for me either. So let's do both. Interacting here was much as possible, respecting my physical form while nurturing my connection to...well, I don't know what but whatever "it" is.

What does "awakening" mean for you in practical terms? This might be helpful to get a grip on the your/mine/our "awakening"

In the last months, through meditation and psychedelics, my own idea of a "self" changed. I believe to see parts of me in others and synchronicities pile up. I can see how information travels beyond physical limitations and how other people entering my life reflect my inner world and personal experience to extreme levels, almost like looking into a mirror. Other people tell me things that are tailored to my specific situations. I could go on, but bottom line is: For me, there is a increasing feeling and perceiving of "oneness". So, I find myself more and more in a state where I perceive communication on two levels: I talk to the ego person in front of me, to the physical limitations of time and space I talk to ..well, I don't know what but something or someone beyond. And energy field that flows through everything and that is not limited by time and space It's kind of strange because it's almost like I can feel whenever I am listening or talking more to the first or the latter. For instance, I know a guy for years and then suddenly he surprises me with some stuff so deep that is so much beyond every expectation that I am literally shocked. Beyond the content, sometimes I also believe to perceive a change in the voice, the tone of the person talking to me. At times it feels like I am talking to my subconscious on a very deep level. Maybe I am projecting, OK To find out if I am or how much - any opinions on that? Similar experiences? Or even if you don't have similar experiences, how do you approach communication with others while at the same time you either experience or have experienced some kind of oneness in the past?

I agree in general. Being> concept. But is the idea of God, how you describe him - boredom, immobilized etc - not a concept itself, the very thing you recommend to drop? This would still be No 1, wouldn't it?

Why did God press the play button? For me, it comes down to three possibilities: Choice: You want things to be the way they are. You want to experience everything exactly the way it is. Which, in a funny way,also includes asking why the play button has been pressed at all + not having long term goals as you do now:) There is no other choice A paradoxical "both, 1+2" that is a fuck up for human minds 🤣 Anyone seeing other possibilities?

It's a personal thing. For me, the structure helps tremendously. Other people in the same room help. Teacher to ask help. Sharing and connecting before and afterwards is HUGE for me. It's also the environment. Nature, calmness, peace. Others prefer to do it in their own. Tried it once at home, was not for me. I never paid for any retreat. They are free. You can give Dana if you want, a donation in any form (nobody asks or checks that). Maybe money, or you offer your service. There is always work to do in the centers- gardening, building, cleaning, project management, etc. Or you give nothing. And there is not much luxury, except for the food which is always AMAZING 😍 Meditation centers have reportedly existed 2500 years ago, so then "lonely guy in cave image" is only partially true. Technique basically is breath, awareness, body scan. Over the years I got more experienced and individualized my method a little, but that's basically it.

@Princess Arabia PM

@Artsy PM

You know what you did with the "see,...." post. If it was not to prove a point about achieving sth, why make the post in the first place? You could have stayed silent. You didn't. That's exactly what I mean.. you're not claiming enlightenment, but you tell others how and what they should do re this. U should have stayed silent there (now I did it again, telling others what to do. How does that feel?) You won't like what I wrote. Don't care. Won't engage further I'm done here

Did quite a few Vipassana retreats. It was different every time, crazy intense every time. Gets you out of your mind and into your body. Much better then contemplating IMO because you're not/less thinking. Truly life changing stuff, but also challenging. Can't compare retreats to doing it at home. The structure, the routine of organized retreats is AMAZING. You can be fully focused on your process. One time, there was a guy always sitting in front of me during breakfast, lunch, tea time. On the last day, when we were allowed to talk again, I approached him. He did not recognize me, he did notice I was on the other side of the table for 10 days! That's how focused you can become, that's how deep you can go because everything else is taken care of during retreat. Be careful re Vipassana tradition depending on teacher and respective biases. Reddit has a lot on this for research. Choose wisely

And you used "I" above two times (and "my" once) to communicate your achievement 😘