theleelajoker

I sometimes feel the same - as if life creates situations to test me No matter what it really is - the way you contextualized it seems super helpful and constructive to me. "Emotional regulation challenge" and "feel and let go". All the rest is just a story. Crazy how much more control I experience in my life by simply letting to of control. Experience it. Stop creating stories or expectations. Feel it. Move on. Repeat. The funny thing of course is also that the "life of testing me" is also a story. What's happening is simply "A situation occurs. This situation causes an reaction that I can observe within the framework of my body"

Back then , I was too tired to structure the information in a high quality manner. Typing on cellphone did not help either. Summarizing and paraphrasing are HUGE re right understanding, 100% agree. Once I could see the patterns, it's crazy how dominant thinking, labeling, categorizing is in our culture. Watching Joe Hudson in action doing coaching also left a giant impression on me. With a lot of love, and charme, and care he cuts through that. To paraphrase him in simplified way: "I'm gonna stop you talking right here. If you continue this story, you just gonna make it harder for both of us. Ok you say you feel XYZ (anger, sadness, incompetence,...) How you know that?Where you feel that in your body? Ok, Feel that. Love that part. You can't ? There's resistance? Ok, feel that. Love that resistance. You say don't know how to do that? You say you can't because reality is XYZ? Stop creating that story. You know how. You just did it. Stop the story, stop labeling, just do it."

A user recently wrote sth like "if you believe that Leo is a highly evolved human then he successfully fooled you" (I would add - you successfully fooled yourself) Drop this assumption you wrote in bold, and then suddenly everything makes sense. He portrays himself in a certain way. But (almost?) nobody knows him in person, we only known this public image. And in public you only show what you want to show, right? Just from time to time, the mask of this carefully created image of "I know, I'm so smart, I'm so evolved etc " slips. Looks at the actions, not the words. Again, then everything makes sense. Also, Leo makes all this big metaphysical and ontological claims, a lot of them based on... sample size of one person and "truthful" psychedelic experiences. Typically experienced people dealing with consciousness warn about the risk to make such claims. They get humble and say that they see high possibility that these high state experiences only project what they want to see - God, infinity, love etc etc - and not the "truth". See also split Brain experiments that emphasize get limited explanatory power of subjective experience. But it's necessary for Leo's identity of superiority and "knowing " to make these claims, to portray him as "more awake then anyone else " etc etc. So much pride, so much tension, so much ego. Personally, I wouldn't even trust him to tie my shoe laces.

@Natasha Tori Maru pretty much concept or labeling vs. direct experience and egoic structure driving this, yes. Information for the sake of information, pathological thinking in form of labeling, desire of control disguised as "understanding", egoic identity forming through subjective "truths". Could have been more short and precise in last post 😂 @Xonas Pitfall tell the hot witch seductress to bring her friends, there are more use cases for them

This gender stuff seem to be a core believe of his identity. These core pillars die hard. More open minded social interaction especially with women might change his mind, but for this one would need to interact IRL and expose oneself to certain situations that have been avoided. How practical it is that "superior cognitive thinker" traditionally live isolated, isn't it?

Description oriented: you make a video about topic XYZ and describe with words "how things (supposedly) work". You go an a forum and describe what "this and that is" and "how the world is" and what "insights" you got. You tell others how the world is, how you see it. The main goal is to express or seek a certain combination of words that satisfy your desire to be right, to confirm your reality tunnel that is built by language. And / or - if there is less attachment - goal is to satisfy your more simple desire to put reality into a concept (examples are "men are this, women are that", "reality is this, and it's not that", "the right way to do is X and not Z", "the causality is Z and not X etc etc") Which can be fine as long as it is a tool towards action or if you face real risks. It's crucial to understand how to build a bridge that carries your weight e.g . But in most cases the discussion is about psychological themes and psychological risk only. And thus it becomes mental masturbation. You're happy when a certain combination of words are expressed ("it is like that" "you are right, it's ABC") or you are pissed if your reality tunnel was not confirmed. As said before, it becomes mainly about creating a mental prison of categories and generalization and creating separation. That's what language mainly is. By putting it into words, concepts etc you get a feeling of understanding, which potentially gives you an illusion of control. Why? Because your afraid to just go out and face the psychological risk. Or because you mistake words and thoughts for the real thing, the experience itself. Pathological thinking instead of doing and being. Action oriented: My statement was: "Imagine all the time and energy spent to describe reality is put into experimental and experiential action ? Simple question: can the words I am expressing / seeking be replaced by action and direct experience? You can think "oh what a wonderful day". Or you stop that thought and put attention on the sun in your face, the smell of leaves and the wind on your skin You describe insights about "how life works" or you stop that thought go out and do stuff, experiencing how life works You can discuss how women and men are or you test your hypothesis by real life interactions You can ask "how to approach men/ women" or just do it You can discuss why you got rejected or why you had success in human interactions or you stop doing that and just continue living without seeking a concept that explains your experience Thinking is like grades in school or certificates. It's supposed to be a tool for learning and signaling. But it became a purpose in itself. I have seen countless examples where people just focus in the grade/certificate and the development, the learning itself becomes the second priority. Same with language, words, concepts etc etc..it does often not enhance action and experience, it inhibits or even replaces it. TLDR: are you defining reality with words or are you experiencing it beyond words?

Just how amazing is that we can have a subjective experience? That we can laugh, cry, breath, observe, interact? That we either have free will, or the appearance of it? That we have the power to create events with our believe, or at least have the appearance that we can? How amazing is it that we can feel our body? Fall in love? Hug out best friend, kiss our partner? That we can taste food, listen to music?

Well said IMO. Re bold: The problem IME is that this effect is FAR greater then anything people typically can imagine. I professional teach about these effects, I do meditation retreats, fasting, I use psychedelics for re-programming (see Lilly's metaprogramming) I pay conscious attention to it etc etc and again and again every year I surprise myself: because the deeper I go into the rabbit hole, the more layers of these effects I uncover for myself. And with every layer I loose, I see it more in others. Some people are interested, attentive and listening and - they immediately recognize these effects when pointed out. And they gain freedom, lightness and the flexibility you talk about. Others are too proud, too scared, too insecure ("I know this, I am aware of this, no it's not a projection it's reality etc") and they get stuck in a loop. It subconsciously became their identity. It's their choice, their life. Problem is that they propagate their subjectively filtered reality as "truth" and thus potentially create for others that pick up parts of that subjective believe system.

My survival is doing fine. Thanks for your care. Using your language: Wait until your happiness get affected by the constant need to categorize and generalize. See what happens when you drop the believe that this is the appropriate method to understand how "everything works". IME, just being aware is enough to recognize the trans- and interpersonal aspects of reality, its interconnectivity and the value and the danger of projections. Generalizations and categorizations have their use, but it's crucial to understand their appropriate use and their limitations. Two quotes come to mind. "If the only thing you have is a hammer, then everything looks like nail." "If you name me, you negate me. You negate all the things I could possibly be"

As written above, the difference is IMO description oriented vs. action oriented. Separation instead of commonality. Imagine all the time and energy spent to describe reality is put into experimental and experimental action. And focus on first person, direct experience instead of generalization and categorization. Just take your own estimate how much content falls into which category, and how it could look instead. And what influence it could have.

Oh we are playing that game? "Dude, the purpose is to experience reality" Or "Dude, the purpose is not to ask "which categorized goup is awakening ABC?" but instead "how can I find the best way to support awakening re the individuals in my direct field of awareness?" Be careful with taking a personal perspective and making it a generalized rule about "purpose" just because it sounds off to you. The difference is description oriented vs. action oriented.

For me, one of the best posts I have seen in this subforum for a while I wanted to say sth similiar, your version I like even more. I want to add: You never approach the concept of "women". There is always a unique, alive individual in front of you. How to approach that individual? *Make eye contact* *Say Hi*

Why does this whole question and discussion even matter? What purpose does it even serve other then creating artificial separation "ohhh men are so much/less more this and that" or "women are soooo much less/much more bla bla bla"? Just creating more ego identity, more separation, more comparison, more judgement based on hearsay, speculations, assumptions and desire for superiority. Aren't many people here taking pride in "oh I am so evolved and this and that and no self and no ego etc"? So what's the whole purpose of this thread? Haven't seen one person talking about meaningful action, just bla bla narratives. Just more identification with certain believes. Stupid AF IMO. (not directed towards OP, more towards some of the answers that followed)

Based on my direct experience within my field of awareness: it's 50:50 and it doesn't matter if you're man or woman. Every "men" vs. "women" discussion re truth and awaking is bullshit and projection. Being a monk doesn't mean you're awake. Being a man doesn't make you more "truthful". You can easily make the opposite case: becoming a mother can connect you more to life than anything else. I mean, can you be more directly be connected to life than carrying and growing life LITERALLY inside you? Is there any method that turns your attention more inwards than pregnancy? Rarely heard more BS than this: " Truth-seeking is a masculine-biased activity. It suits the masculine better because the masculine is more ruthless, direct, blunt, ambitious, proactive, goal-oriented, lone-wolf, emotionally detached" Someone urgently seems to need validation for his own self worth by creating a story like this and presenting it as "truth" lol

Leo's blog is IMO heavily coloured by his own experience and POV, but presented as a general truth. He seems to feel socially isolated, he seems to crave social validation etc but he projects it as a generalization - and thereby seems to portray himself as someone with extraordinary cognitive development. It's easy to make the case with a 180° turnaround. Someone with extraordinary cognitive development can easily integrate his ideas with social environment because he acquired the skills to do so. You recognize what's needed and how to communicate that content. IMO the blog post ( in particular first part) is a shitty narrative created to justify his own situation and development curve.

Yeahhh OK 😂 I'll go and get more coins for my vending machine. Hope it's enough for a new axe, mine just broke trying to show off my A-game of cutting a tree in front of an attractive girl...

Yeah, I see the common ground. What about accepting your quote above but ADDING a second one"The most comprehensible thing about the universe is that it is INcomprehensible" In language terms, it's either one state or the other. Or in other words, one quote is true or the other - is comprehensible, or it is not. I tend toward "it's both". My perspective on it is now 1) language is binary but the universe is not and 2) you can gain understanding, but there's constant change. So as soon as you understand something, you change and thus your way of perceiving and acting in reality, and that interconnexion causes changes that again are to be understood, but because of ....and so on.

Nice metaphor. I agree but also would add that's something applying in particular when we deal with people. If I go to the gym - focus muscles - I get pretty linear results. I cut a tree - focus matter - I get pretty linear results using my axe. Also, re OP: how you know your A game is what others perceive as attractive and A game, too? I have seen guys thinking they are flirting and impressing the girl while they were actually putting her off and boring her to death lol

Many many times. You can see it like that. Or as something like universal mind. Or something else. You can see it also like that: It's simply an event happening. How I interpret it doesn't tell me anything else then what I project on reality, what I want to see. Most neutral description I can come up spontaneously: "There is the observation of a (silent) combination of words that carry a learned meaning and then a experience that seems in some way to reflects this combination of words in an event"

Agree on that.

I rather think: "I don't know why he/she did XYZ" Believing that he's the one supposed to be leading is already projection. I had plenty of experiences where the woman was mainly leading the interaction or where the lead was changing over time and in total balanced.

Stop manipulating me, woman! I know your game! I'll immediately go to my voodoo puppet and start stabbing needles! But....I mean.. just in case you are at least a 6.7429 IRL, and you can 100% guarantee me that you won't reject me, and you definitely allow me to keep my mask and not ever fucking ever ask me questions that put my self image and believe system into doubt.... I could maybe imagine myself to have a grateful day and to allow yourself to be manipulated by me to into having sex together. But you have to cuddle me afterwards and not tell anyone that I enjoyed the cuddle!

I get your way of thinking. Don't know how much you already do it - what might help to get clarity is less thinking and more turning attention inwards. Take a walk in nature, feel your body, guide your attention through your body parts. Consciously feel your feelings and body sensations. Chances are you finish the walk knowing exactly what to do next. And that NEXT step is all you need.

If I was you, I would question your assumptions like the one above. No wonder your mind feels fucked up with all these limitations you put on yourself, your experience and external reality. It's like solving a equation with hundreds of constraints and variables while having close to zero hard information and fixed determinants. How you know you must have decision before? How you know you must make decision alone? How you know your decision is not dependent on how your GF reacts I open dialogue? How you know that best way to find aligned action is contemplating? How you know what the colleges experience is supposed to be like? I could go on for pages. But you get the direction

Guys, I used to think and act like you.. trying to figure out keys to interaction and dating etc, analyzing, planning and so on. Over time I came to the conclusion that my smart analysis and experiences in external reality is mostly just unconscious projection. Reading through the analysis why particular women (or men) do this or that or don't is now a source of entertainment for me. Nothing more than that. To quote Marcus Aurelius: "Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth"