koops

That sounds like a real problem. Watching porn even in a relationship is not that weird. But paying women is another thing. Don't pay for sex. And is not even sex! Is a bunch of pixels scamming you. Imagine that girl laughing at you. And his pimp too. Imagine Tate laughing at you for paying for that shit! 'Look at that poor little guy, he is paying for my new Ferrari and he's not even having sex; good work girl' Keep the porn. Don't pay a single dollar of your hard earn money to a bitch that is laughing at you. Use that money to take your girlfriend to a nice dinner and fuck the shit out of her.

Feminism is stage green. And a lot of women in developed countries don't want to have kids in their 20s because they want to sleep around and focus on their careers. To later regret in their 30s. I have friends that don't want to have kids because of the carbon footprint... Also family is not as valued as before, at least in Europe. Is almost seen as a negative thing. This trend started just 5-10 years ago. Thats pure green. Ofc economic growth (orange) is part of the deal. Is not black and white, but half a century ago (stage orange with almost no green) people were having more kids. Maybe I didn't express it clearly. I meant that we are trying to evolve to healthy green (with good things like women rights), but some green policies can backfire (lots of immigration from stage blue-red countries that are against this advancements). Or for example, stage green women are so open minded, that in the name of tolerance, can't speak against muslims beliefs even if the totally disrespect women. I don't have the data, but I not sure about that. The number of people of lowers stage of development are increasing. Thats an undeniable fact. And thats my concern. Are we so openminded that can backfire if a few decades?

Just found this guy. Gold.

I see one big problem with the spiritual path. Is so abstract and so overwhelming especially y in the beginning, you probably don't even know what to focus on or what to do. For example, my first contact with spirituality was reading 'The Power of Now' 10 years ago. I started meditating and read a few more books on the topic. Got great insights and good results from my new understandings and from the practice of daily meditation... but until last year I never even occur to me the idea of doing a 10 day solo retreat. Until last year, I didn't know about most practices listed below like Kriya Yoga or Self-Inquiry (ofc my main focus wasn't spirituality this last decade, I just focused on it for some stretches of weeks-months, just reading theory and doing meditation). Most newbies don't know what practices to do. The low hanging fruits are a few minutes of meditation, conventional yoga and reading theory. For sure that can have some benefits, even big ones, but most people are not going to get deep enough. And a lot of time can get be wasted not knowing alternative/more powerful methods. Most probably are going to quit because of it (is like trying to get jacked, and spend years just doing pushups and bodyweight squats, without even knowing what a bench press or a barbell squat is) So I made a compilation of spiritual practices: -Meditation -Contemplation -Neti-neti -Self inquiry -Solo retreat -Vipassana retreat -Psychedelics -Kriya yoga -Conventional yoga -Spiritual autolysis -Connecting with nature -Gratitude -Theory (reading, videos, live gurus/mentors) -Breathwork -Shadow work I know there is a debate on the forum about meditation vs psychedelics. Everyone is different, and the path can vary from one person to another. Thats fine. And thats the point. To have different perspectives. So the idea of this post is twofold: -Have a ranked list of spiritual practices in one place that can be tried and tested, especially for newbies. -You can share your personal tier list of your practice (so people can have a sense of what are the most useful overall) Here is the tier list link: https://tiermaker.com/create/list-of-spiritual-practices-15731211 Feel free to add some practices.

Is quite normal to have this problems in the beginning. Most guys don't recognize it but is real. My tip is that you learn to eat pussy like a pro and learn to make a girl squirt. Ofc is not ideal, but is a safety net. I had that in the past. Couldn't get it up but the girl left with a few orgasms without even penetrating her. And she wanted to meet again. Also, if you can't get it up don't start apologizing or take it too seriously. Don't justify yourself. Play with your tongue, fingers, or just chill with her in bed for a few minutes like not big deal. And go for it later.

Maybe the point is not to avoid suffering. Maybe our focus should be in the pursuit of something that is deep inside you and suffer if its needed. If you have a higher purpose, something meaningful to fight for, suffering is more bearable. In fact, when you are young, you should try to put yourself in situations where there is a potential for suffering. Traveling alone to an undeveloped country, going out with that girl that can end up breaking your heart, starting that business that is likely to fail, go to that party alone and try to pick up girls sober, trying psychedelics, go hitchhiking... Suffering is what make you grow the most, probably way more than meditating and reading Eckhart Tolle. But is not one or the other. Everything has value. The fear of suffering can be worse than suffering.

I get that. You are the judge, but my point is: if you know nothing you need good references to start with. For example, I respect Leo, and he advised meditation, contemplation, self inquiry and kriya yoga. Now he says that the real deal are psychedelics. Cool, thats great info, and a valid perspective from a person that tested those practices, and now we can have nice reference points. For me is not about copying someone, nor going 100% by yourself. But to reference and test what other successful people in this area have done and implement/discard based on how you are wired/life situation...

I read a few posts of him talking about 20 day solo and yoga retreats and loto of practice. Why is that wrong from your POV? Which alternative do you recomend in order to raise ones level of consciousness and/or awaken?

What do you mean? Im pretty new on the forum and dont know the members

One of the best out there. I dont find any contradictions, and I have read/listen to the book dozens of times. Dont just read it. Read 1-2 similar chapters at a time and contemplate on them. Find ways to apply them. Look for your blindspots. With time and life experiencie, when your level of consciousness increases, the things that confuses you now will seem obvious. Happened to me. When I read it the first time 6-7 years ago only got a small porcentage of the real value of the book.

You got decent results, so there is nothing wrong with you. You know that if you did it a few times, you can repeat it. I had my time when I used routines because I was very shy. And that gave me confidence. But leaving them behind... was tough, it was like starting again almost from scratch. But is the good move long term. If your focus is your LP or exploring psychedelics, go for it and forget about girls. Listen to your inner voice and go with it. Is tough to balance 2 or 3 big things at once. But be sure you are not changing your focus as an escape.

Nice way to say it. - In a way, accepting pain, reduces suffering.

Sure, I get that, but how many people woke up without any previous practice? How are you even going to realize that your eyes are closed without ever reading a spiritual book, or attending a spiritual talk, or without trying meditation or psychedelics? And then, if you realize that your eyes are closed, how are you going to open them? - Yes, you can't plan or 'schedule' an awakening the same way you can't know which water drop is going to finally break the rock, but drops have to keep dropping until it happen. Ofc 99% of meditators or pshycedelics users are not going to awaken, but 99'9999% of people that dont have any practice are neither going to awaken.

Was thinking the same lately. My perspective is that spiritual work can help dealing with painful situations, and reducing suffering, but not pain. For example, if your wife leaves you, you are going to feel pain. 100%. Thats how we are wired. Even if Tolle's wife leave him or died, he is going to feel pain, cry, and grief. We have an animalistic side. Like you said. Im sure Osho wanted to get out of jail as quickly as possible. His animalistic side wanted better survival conditions. The problem with most people is that when something bad happens they are going to create a narrative that will bring more suffering in addition to the real pain: 'We were meant to be together for a lifetime', 'life is never fair to me', 'Im unlucky', 'my life is going to be misery now', 'I can't live without her', 'I won't find another woman like this', 'why bad things happen to good people?... and so on. Spiritual work makes you realize that those are all made up stories. Periphery. Ego. So the attachment to that stories brings suffering. And that is more or less avoidable. But pain is not going anywhere. Becase in a relationship, for example, we are attached to that person. Like it or not. There is always attachment. Healthier or unhealthier, but there always is. To the body, to the business/job, to our family, to our partner... So there will be pain if there is a breakup, or if your business fail, or ir a family member dies, or if you have health problems. The question is: can we let go the attachment to the STORY we made up?

Damn, that was bad. I went to a Derek free tour a few years ago. Didn't like the guy, but I liked rsd, especially Tyler's old videos (2012-15), so why not go? Holy shit, what an awful experience. First we had to keep our phones out of the room. I have no problem with that, nowadays people get distracted and can be better to not have your phone with you, but then I realized the main reason they do that is that you can't record and upload that shit show. The free talk was around 1hour. NO-THING of value. Tyler rants are fine, I liked the old ones. But this... so bad. I remember nothing about it. The he proceeded with a 2 hour pitch to a bootcamp. Old students in the audience start to talk about his transformations and how great it was. He kept pitching aggressively and disrespectfully. During this 2 hours people were signing in for it (I think it was 3000€ for 2-3 day bootcamp, mostly run by coaches). More than 10 people sign in, so the coach-student ratio was not going to be very appealing and you won't be getting real value time with the main coach (Derek). And in the end... The new students, and all the previous students of him that were there get up on stage. So there were like 40 people standing on stage, and like 7 of us still sitting. At that point I decide to just enjoy the shitshow. It became kind of funny lol He told us to sit in the first row, and almost start to insult us haha A couple guys started to justify themselves on why they were not taking the program. After a few minutes talking down to us like we were 3rd class citizens and realizing he wasn't taking our money, he just 'let us go' with a high level of disrespect. Inside I was laughing. I just was laughing inside. It was preposterous. And the worst thing is 'who wants to be like that guy?'. Who wants to be coached but that guy?. Watch some of his content on youtube. If I were in a Julien or Max free tour, I could consider taking a hot seat, maybe even a bootcamp. They look cool, like guys you can emulate if you are young, at least in this seduction area; and friends of mine went to Max hotseat and say it was great, but this guy Derek... damn...

From the top of my head: -Is not about your you. Is about them. Fall in love with your customer, not with your product. -Don't sell an app, a program, coaching... sell a better version of themselves. -Your copy is not meant to make the reader understand. Your copy is meant to make the reader feel understood. -Good marketing is about telling how great you are. Great marketing is about making your potential customers understood. When they read your copy they have to be saying to themselves 'yes, yes, yes... this guy gets me' -Understand your customers problems better than them -Dont tell them, show them. -Always join the conversation happening in your ideal customer's head. -Offer what they want, deliver what they need. -Product > Marketing . And the first paragraph of the best book on marketing/copy, Breakthrough Advertising: Let's get right down to the heart of the matter. The power, the force, the overwhelming urge to own that makes advertising work, comes from the market itself, and not from the copy. Copy cannot create desire for a product. It can only take the hopes, dreams, fears and desires that already exist in the hearts of millions of people and focus those already- existing desires onto a particular product. This is the copy writer's task: not to create this mass desire—but to channel and direct it.

Black and white thinking. The pendulum in society is moving so much towards casual sex that this looks that an overreaction (stage blue aproach). People tend to think: Casual sex = Superficial and meaningless Sex in relationship = Profound and meaningful Ofc is usually like that, but you can have deep profound experiences from one night stands or sex with fuckbuddies. The problem is when you over do it. It can get meaningless quick, I agree with that, but is not black and white. Also some people are wired for committed relationships, others not so much. And one more thing. I feel Peterson can't accept the good things about ONS or fwb, because it wouldn't fit his life narrative. Like the person who is having casual sex till his 40s would have a tough time accepting the good parts of having a long time relationship. Is a way of protecting your identity and feeling good about your choices.

Definitely not. I explained my situation it in my first replay, and for sure the majority of guys feel similar to that. Also talked about this with my male friends that are now married and with kids in their 30s. They say: 'I had my fun with casual sex in my 20s, but now I love being with my wife and kids' (Im also certain that their wives also have a similar situation). And sure, they probably still want to fuck other girls, but overall, they look quite happy. I can't imagine being married with kids or being a 70 year old man looking at hot chicks in the street and thinking: 'damn, I never enjoyed that'

You can be at turquoise with underdevelop stages below. The same as the broke hippie. He is green, but without red, blue and orange integrated. The same with these mystics. They can go full turquoise, the same as the hippie goes full green skipping stages below. This doesn't mean is healthy nor the best path to go. But this can be a stretch for SD, and not even practical for westerns who have to earn money and live in and orange society with all its complexities. PS: Nisargadatta was illiriterate and you can say he was at stage turquoise.

Exactly. Cold approach was the most popular thing, but the least effective. It can be brutal, especially in the beggining and if you do it alone. You have to make game as fun as possible. You are not in the military or studying for an exam. Ask yourself: -How can I make it more fun? -How can I put myself in an easy position to get laid? (lone wolf cold approaching in malls as a newbie IS NOT the best thing. Is close to the worse option). Joining different social circles (dancing classes, yoga, workshops, hobbies...), going out with your friends to bars & clubs, joining puas in your town and doing nightgame, going to Ibiza/Mallorca a couple weeks in summer/vacation) Also you can try tinder if you are decent looking, but you NEED GOOD photos, solid text game and knowing how to run a date. The best place start is to go out with your friends/puas. Get drunk, let loose. That would make it easier in the beginning, hell, even learn some openers, or some lines for critical moments (like pulling or handling female friends). Once you fuck 1 girl, things will get easier and your confidence will skyrocket. You can try to 'master' cold approach but that is the hard long road and not the right timing. You can still go for it, but focus on putting yourself in favorable conditions and forget by now about 'mastery'. Go for the short term lay.

Not really. And is not that I broke up with her haha, was pretty much consensual. It was obvious that we were in different paths at that time. She wanted long term commitment, and 100% it wasn't the time for me. I wanted to explore life and the world with no attachments. Aside from the sexual variety thing, I wanted, even felt that I NEEDED to travel alone for a while and learn to become more independent. And it wasn't a whim. Don't know why, but was something deep inside me (and she already had done that in the past). - But I get it, some men get out of a relationship for the casual sex and variety, but being single is not a full time party. Girls and sex are not given to you just because you are single. There is also the struggle. And sometimes sex in a relationship is better than casual, and I get some men regret it. But for me also was a time of personal growth, getting better at game, and discovering more about the female body and mind through variety, getting more life experience in that field until I felt enough is enough, and I hit the point of diminishing returns; and also having the chance to start a new relationship from a higher place and with that 'karma burnt'.

Oh yes... sex can fill a mans mind when is young. It happen to me in my late 20s. Had a gf for 5 years, break up, and the next few yearsI had sex with different kind of women for all over the world. All continents and races. Then I met a cool girl and now we are in a 3 year relationships with kids on the horizon. With my ex (my 1st gf) I felt something inside that I NEEDED to fuck way more girls. Like I had to burn through that karma before I settle down (I never even visualize myself having kids with her). Now in my early 30s, yes, I still want to bang hot girls when I see them in the street, but I just accept that as a part of being a healthy male. Did I transcend sex? Hell no! But at least I trascended the DESIRE of having sex with everything that moves. Maybe is age. Maybe is that I already had my 'casual sex sprint' and tasted all the flavors. But yeah, as Osho said. Is natural. You can't force/supress something like sex. The problem with sex (as with money), is when it fills your mind. Sex is to be experienced, not to be thinking about it all day. Sex in the bed is great, sex in the mind is a burden. Money in the bank is great, money in the mind is also a burden.

What about Osho? He was a wise sage, but was critic of government and religion, even democracy but didn't propose anything new.

Louis CK and George Carlin.

Of course there are broken woman on dating apps. No different than in clubs, bookstores, dance classes, the street... Your job as a man is to filter the good ones and get them on dates. Then be high value enough (confidence, game, good at sex...) to 'convert' them into fuckbuddies/gf. So, or you are not high value enough, or you don't know how to filter good girls from broken ones.