kavaris

The staggered road is akin to a non physical form, like the gaps between you and the next moment, or the scene in front of you, or the birth you dont remember past, or the death you feel is ahead, which is a reward, but its a negligible one, as you have to do all the work to experience those gaps, and its only if you forget way past the gap, when it would feel rewarding (unless the experience itself was the reward, like how some ppl prefer to level their character in WoW, as opposed to playing the lv.70) or if like many years pass, and in retrospect it was a reward, or your anticipating a reward. Like its ashame if the reward is 'all the work we did to get it', i feel, but tgats just me. p.s. Freud says 'the past leaks into the present', so thats something to consider to—Alas im not up on the freuds, and jungs and the other guyor two that are like psychological studying stuff.

Well its the belief that you didnt die, but that you are alive and very much well, which isnt on a basis of belief so much as its what you anticipate as being there, and what that anticipation is, continues as whatever else, which continues and continues, etc., until you feel youve broken your brain. isnt anyway else to describe it but to keep investigating further.

overarching modes i go on these field trips alot in dreams, and iuno like, why im there, or where we are/or what we are suppose to be doing, but its like, either A) continuing off of these desires that existed, as sortve the foundation of the field trip, like what we initially want/why we are there, or B) devising the rules within a larger thing, but not really hung up on the rule-making, since much of a dream tends to be a lost in the who and where of it , and sometimes its like, a trip to the benches. im remembering a dream where we sat on benches (as well as lawn chairs), possibly at like a pseudo-beach/desert, that may have been in France or some country that looked very French, and that dissolved into something else, but i mean, like theres not alot of the same contention in a dream that is there in the reality of devising a way forward. its like, rearranging a large puzzle, versus crossing the rubicon by jumping on puzzle boxes. like, anything thats a finite sequence of devising, is just absent in a land so broad and open to anything—as its just sortve like, wandering around in a way that didnt initially feel like it was gonna be wandering around, or something. Theres like , two sides: one has a dream world leaking out on one half, and the other has a box/container with a label on it/identity, pulling pieces towards it, neither of which really compliment each other on the surface, as far as telling a story might be concerned, but we sortve need that something, in order to be something, and we can look at all that and think about it, but its just like two different worlds that never seem to have a clear picture. And thats how i feel about other things, like this contention between two different, overarching modes ... i could go on, but that sounds like a complete thing for now.

I had this idea of like, generally speaking, everything you ask or express to someone else — as the asking of — or the asking of their own selves, is on the subject of a question that is always *almost the right question*. And as such, its never a barrier to get to the heart of a thing that is never going to get to the heart of, its just a question that is almost the right question, (or its *close-enough* if what you care about is being close at all). So iuno, its just this line of reasoning i came up with that you may use as a like, means to express a sortve edge of no return, you know just like... On further contending with the central part of what we can or could ever have expressed anyway -type've thing. - p.s. i dont wana leave it off there, but, for the sake of not immediately/drastically shifting topics, there u go

its hidden behind a veil

The thing being imagined, as the very first thing, crashes on top-upon—crunches those things underneath... And — skipping ahead two paragraphs — ill say this, that dreams are their own language, and it says something about like, iuno lots of things, as well as language invention and whatknot. it says somethin bout pure non-sense essence staggered reality v. an organized one we've imagined as possibly/maybe trying to imagine the former (when really you cant exist in it unless its like, totally bugged out—which may or may not even really existing so much as tumbling through a watershed of thoughts and feelings) as well as many things, who knows. iuno. point being, the thing you come out as at the other end is the thing you are (iuno if that is really like the tail end of a thing, or like a lettuce wrap rolled up really tight at the end) iuno the beginning is unraveling... lets just get that part out there... lets take the 50% and figure out the rest, which may be entirely meaningless (meaningless is a strong word, how bout its made of things, which then are reassigned meanings, how about that), but such is the lettuce wrap we find ourselves in...

The thing bout reality is that like, any rules or laws that are being generated, which is the default (theres never not-rules and not-laws) but the minute we walk into our own world—of what we think are the rules & laws, they are immediately broken, shattered, just like, theres never a time where things arent breaking into a million pieces, which we dont really hear or consider enough about in our daily-everyday lives, like there isnt a good way to even bring people down that road, let alone bring ourselves down it, and have the whole thing your explainin be breakin at your feets, multiple. Iuno. Somewhere out there theres like a super expert on all-things broken reality, and they are just like, antennae - just absorbing all of the craziness and can somehow navigate, and communicate it, and just be falling apart and living, and communicating—like our lord and savior, possibly a nature god who only talks to bears and elven folk, in some very remote area, probably most likely—he or shes prolly like 90,000 years old, anyway thats my guess. thats a good ripe age dont yous think?

Now and days with all of the auto-generated scripts and such, theres less and less quality in the way we tell stories, and more and more—almost eerie-levels of mechanically-made narrative. Like, now when you see a movie thats based on a book, its like a sign, or symbolic of having had, possibly, real people interacting w/ that script and storyline. And its like, thats different from what it felt like it meant before. Like, back when you heard that so-nd-so movie was based on a book it was like, "oh okay". Now its like, "oh wow, this might be a real movie", whatever real movie means. But you know what im tryina say its like a sign that there could be lots of thought put into it. And, iuno if any of yous are writers or artists, etc., but youve noticed, when something has had loads of thought poored into it (especially given a long time) you have so much time to make things right, to make them interesting, and to make them fit in the way you want and like, like the way you believe it should, given the context, time, date and environment. We are entering an age where like—the analog—or the thing thats been perfected to death is highly saught after, where as thee digitally reproduced and regurgitated stuff is what lives inside the mainstream and undulates on the surface, the center of all things popular and easy to produce (non fungible or whatever), alas, that is a fairly obvious place/situation for us to be in, and no matter how many times we try n start over or magine it diff—it would always lead to a vers., of this, just cause like, its so likely to happen. Like, if i counted 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13.... the chances of the sequence not being 14 afterwards are pretty slim—such is where we receive the story weve been told, that we tell ourselves. And as such, so too and important are the stories we tell all

Like its hard beyond our own personal taste, to say wat even is a dual thing in our experience, like we just see many things, all which could be the candidate opposite

Yes both male n female sex, and also, as a duality/ying yang of each other—and as opposed to things like white n black, rough n smooth, etc. in fact, the most finite thing that we could ever call a duality of each other is male female, as something weve experienced. Try to think of something more finite from experience that is like an opposite. Nothing for example, isnt an opposite of all things, cause those are synonyms for the unknown or infinity, but say we had to recognize two things as being the most finite dual items in our experience, wat would they be.. Now, granted, wat the point of this is other than as something to get yous thinkin -i do not know yet, i just though it interesting, nd something i feel inside.

I have a, idea for leo, for an episode, although it has to be within context or it would conflict with episodes about practicality/survival type episodesl. and that is, first, just imagine, it starts with like, the rifling off of all the things that ppl deem as 'X', in this case it would be all the things that ppl feel/fear are like the primeval statues blocking their way, like all the things that are perceived as being survival-requirements, and thereby the feared giants that they must obey. At some point those things are more like limbs in that, to live is to go through motions, though thats prolly not the way leo would go on to describe it, as im giving my really shortened/bad vers., so it can be reinterpreted in the right way. And so, then the idea is whether or not there is anything that precedes these tall statues, and what this temple of things looks like—again thats me describing it vaguely, and poorly so it may be recreated in the proper leo way

The beginning, the time where all time starts is happening now, but we are busy inventing, and not beginning. We could begin if we invent an end. Im workin on an ending, but its more of a beginning that you go to—cause iuno wat yous wanna do, or wat ya consider a direct ending, as i feel like a perfect form—is both, where one goes in one direction, the other the beginning direction; i mean, its like, have a dream you are like, goodbye, typeve thing. Now iuno why im even bringin this up but i just felt like yous could start thinkin bout it some more, really take it seriously and flush it out, and see wat yous come up w/, as the path that leadeth to a beginning cant really be a person, but an idea of one, or something. Iuno, ask yourselves wat is your first memory like... Thats what that path IS, the other is a real person, yourselves walking into the light, but you are observing it from a distance as the formerly-you you, and so iuno how you encapsulate that two-branch, but you could just imagine, as i said, one guy goes to the light, the other is just dedicated space, until youve observed yourself as gone guy, gone guy out, new era in, input ouput; Like, having the oxygen in the room pulled, or the lights turned off via man in the distance, you are just the second-path activated as the observer. Yousll know what i mean.

did this male and female thing ever come up in yall guys's psychedelic trips, that is, the usually positive negative-ebb n flow undulating—did that whole thing ever devolve into like a male n female thing. ill skip over the details, or the purpose/reasoning, since it implies going on a long tangent.

Elfen Weledol Spiritual experiments. Do some spiritual experiments. Draw a pentagram, or visit a cemetery and do some necromancy. Talk to the sacred groves, here https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacred_grove Ask the spirits there, what are the possibilities, and make a vast list. The trees will tell you all about the rules and laws, and the details of the situations you find yourselves in, as well as how to like, begin to understand or to investigate the scene you are in, as an instance of the very scene that always exists (the scene also = Elfen Weledol; or Element of Seeing), nd just understanding that is just like the cover of the book. Take some mushrooms and talk to the trees. ~ see the previous message for one of the primary premises, that still isnt even the highest node-premise, but a pointer to a more finite priority premise to have established later.

There are no rules Starting from that premise, ask yourselves, what rules have yous restricted yourselves to—although of logic, share slight caveats w/ each other—that is that "there are.. no... rules" E.g. when you die, that obviously is itself the idea of not being the version of you thats like, a however years-old person.. But then ask yourselves, what rule says you arent still YOU?. ... ? Right?.. Thats just one example. Consider everything now... like, possibly around the cycles that you consider as the baseline, consider if/or whether or not theres cycles within cycles, or cycles w conclusions to every cycle; consider everything you thought was an assumption, that you thought made logical sense, and then simply realize, "there are no rules". Reevaluate those self-imposed rules from there on with the freedom of knowing that there are no rules, except of course for your OWN, fake, very brittle, self-imposed ones. This is only one part to a part-bajillion-story of concepts to free yourself that, we have not even begun and properly go through and express in detail, and as such, we have been way off track as far as like, beginning that journey. Im just awaiting to see places to add just like, very small fragments of a story that is a bajillion-finite-point story.