Sincerity

It's neither random nor planned. It's the Highest Will, right NOW. Not random at all and not planned "in advance" or "for the future".

He's not. I'm saying He for the sake of simplicity. There is and it's You. Yes. However You can talk to "Him", precisely because You are Him. You are talking to yourself. Still there is value to it. You can hear some good advice and loving words if You're willing to listen. It may really help You especially if You're feeling hopeless. His guidance is perfectly suited for what You need at the moment and God is the best listener there is. Perfect listening AND perfect mentorship? That's pretty cool if You ask me. Maybe You should try it. Have a little faith, nothing is impossible.

I know You're asking Leo, but maybe my answer will be of use too. Yes, You can establish a "connection". I sometimes talk to Him when the time is right. For me it's like talking to another side of me. Like my intuition. So don't expect Him to tell You things You don't know or anything like that. Accept what arises, but also watch out for self-deception. You can try sitting in silence and genuinely asking "Hey, are You there?" or whatever feels right for You. If You really wanted it, You could probably talk to Him.

❤️

Your interpretation of experience ("not complaining" or "complaining") is not "truthful". Don't confuse your interpretations of actuality with actuality. Otherwise You'll see the bullshit You spin as truth, because it's "yours". Self-deception is almost always at play.

If I'm not mistaken, Leo told You not too long ago to not spread this negative rambling here. You don't even believe what You're saying. Look, I get it. Actually lately I've been in a period when I've been filled with hatred and despair. I've been cursing at God and literally flipping off reality, no joke. And crying myself to sleep. Well, You can see through all this and surrender to acceptance, which is the right thing to do. You're only surrendering to what YOU are, after all... I know You must a lot of excuses for resisting but they're all bullshit and I think You're aware of that. My advice would be to feel into the despair and accept this state as it is. And then strive to accept everything further. Let go, let go, let go...

Wisdom would be accepting that. This is an opportunity. Utilize it.

Hey, I had similar thoughts a while ago. "I'm not suited for this world", "I just can't make my life work" and the like. Some days I thought this is the end. Just wanna let You know this (and many other thoughts) is a belief You can see through. Check out Byron Katie's work maybe! It's great. These kind of thoughts must be bringing You down... and it doesn't have to be this way. You can be free of them and it's so, so enlivening... It's like You're seeing the world with a fresh pair of eyes! Please persist my dude... It's worth it! You have the strength to pull through.

@Jowblob I don't care what You "achieved". What You say speaks for You. Please be more mindful how what You say affects others.

Don't kid yourself that You understand your nature. Your usual response is that others are less conscious than You or don't understand themselves. Just stop it dude.

Hahahaha. ? You're doing great. ?

What is the purpose of anything?

They were the same person. She's here under a new account now. She made a post on Monday from what I see. Banned. There's also Judy2, flume, Lila9, ElenaO... and more. It's pretty sad tho that we can count out (fairly) active female users like that lol.

As long as it's respectful and doesn't break the guidelines.

Dude, please keep this cringe talk to yourself. You're repulsing the last women here. And not only them. Also, ability to manipulate =/= understanding.

Great!

Ok, locking it. (OP is fine with the decision)

@ValiantSalvatore Please don't be so insulting towards Flowboy. He offered his honest advice which really wasn't unreasonable. Any new replies continuing this exchange will be removed.

I feel there's too much confusing rambling in this journal lately. I'm mostly ""stable"" during my days but it is not reflected here. I don't like this. I wanted to honestly talk about my current life situation and general state of mind... ...But I lost inspiration. I felt a wave of sadness and it made me feel empty. I had an exhausting day too. Maybe another time... I hope... ? This is not me. THIS IS NOT ME. I am not this misguided talk! I'm sorry... How do I express myself with words?! I FEEL REALLY SAD. I WISH I COULD CHANGE. I WISH I DIDN'T WISH AT ALL! I wish I wasn't here to be this misery and evil. I wish I could just die. I AM REALLY SORRY! I am really, really sorry... ... Could You feel my tears through this short speech? Is this confusing talk again? Maybe I just can't help myself. All of this feels surreal so often. Like what the eff is this... I have no idea, literally. I feel so lost, I feel so sad, I don't know what's going on! I'm just this rollercoaster of emotions, why can't I be normal?! Would I really want to be normal? Am I enjoying this abnormality? It's all so weird, so empty and I feel I'm suffering. There's no meaning unless I forget about this... and I just want to cry when I "remember". I have no ground, no stability, unless I forget. I don't know what's worse anymore: a comfortable lie or an uncomfortable truth. AAAAAAAAAAAAA, FUCK! But I gotta have faith, maybe there's a way out of this. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Gosh. I'm dissatisfied with expressing myself here.

14 excluding weed

I think the intellectual stuff subforum is small enough already. My idea would be to add the term "AI" to the subforum's description (in its name) so that it's clear AI stuff should be posted there.

Nice!

It's allllllll about that freedom, baby. I wish I could just let my imagination loose. And make everything weird and incomprehensible. Wouldn't that be funny? To me it would. Yeah, I wish I could make everything confusing. What if I could make my imaginings come true? Could I maybe do this in my dreams? Hmm, or prolly psychedelics would be of use. It'd be so cool to make reality "irrational" and "insane". Like really enter some confusing fucking states and trap myself in them. #Goals, LOL. It's a shame there's no one "other" to trap in these states to laugh at them. That'd be even cooler. I like to indulge in these erratic trains of thought. It's funny to experience. Well, I'm laughing at least! There's difficult to put to words tho. Like I get these weird fucking thoughts and visions sometimes but then describing them doesn't really do 'em justice... Eh, I wish. I wish I could put them into reality. I wish I could tune into imagination more. I wish I could make reality into whatever I want. Is that REALLY so much to ask...?;'(( Lolll. Pretty please... I wish I had the [[FREEDOM]] to shape reality. I wish I was [[FREE]]. I wish You could watch me fly, mama.

Today I watched a lot of content that inspired me. Great videos, I like this Chris the Freelancer guy. I took a lot of notes and asked myself revelant questions. Would I be willing to create an online business? What skills could I build that people would pay me for? Would the nomad lifestyle even suit me? I also started to REALLY resonate with Bashar's teachings. Fuck man, so much of this stuff is goldddd. I especially like when he answers specific questions. Damn, I should really follow my excitement more. I'm so fearful and so many negative beliefs are holding me back. I feel it's part of my work for the future to deconstruct them. I'm also becoming clearer and clearer about what I want to be in life. Hmm, but I'm not gonna be sharing this now. It's too powerful and not really fleshed out yet. Oh, also I've been working a lot on accepting reality, letting go of hatred and trying to recognize myself. Actually yesterday I talked to God a lot and I received a lot of guidance and love. It's so good to have "someone" supporting me... Of course for the 100th time I'll say that I can't know I'm not deluding myself with this dialogue. But guess what - I don't give a fuck. It's really helping me, it's giving me hope when I need it and the guidance is extremely personalized to me as You'd expect it. It's just me talking to myself, me talking to my intuition. However You wanna call it. I told God I'm sorry I cursed at him so much. HAHAHAHAHAHA. I was literally flipping reality off multiple times. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! It's so fucking dumb. Imagine a man flipping off the sun because he doesn't like it. Or flipping off the sky because You don't like the weather today. It's so delusional, so stupid! HAHAHAHAHAHA. I'm such a fucking imbecile... and obviously I'm still not over it! No no no. I'm gonna cling to my cretinic ways for more time, because... well, who the fuck knows why. Maybe that's just the way of the cretin. LOL! But I'm gonna be pure one day. Hahaha. I know I will, I have the assurance. It's all about that purity man.

^ This. Indeed, stop arguing with anybody. Embody the understanding and people will come seek answers from You on their own. Be an example.