thierry

(Long story short, I had a drug-induced psychosis and was taken to a psychiatric hospital. Within ten minutes, they decided to inject me with high doses of antipsychotics and other psychiatric drugs that destroyed my body for two months. I was given 30 mg of Abilify every day for two months, and that was just one of many. On top of that, due to a genetic condition, I already had a very fragile and heavily strained nervous system, and my body was absolutely not prepared to receive this kind of treatment. It really destroyed my body from the inside, drained all the life out of me, and now I live with constant physical suffering every day, 24/7.) So basically We were in bed with my girlfriend and I wanted to be reassured. It’s been 5 years now that I live with that and I considered my life to been wanted, I’m okay with that. I have acceptes that I am dead and I can’t wait to die to be fair) I asked her whether, deep down, all of this might be part of my karma, that I had to go through this hell. And she told me, no, she doesn’t believe in karma. So I told her basically it could have been avoided. And she said yes. And I told her that for me, it’s unacceptable that I’m living through all this hell when I could have avoided it if, at some point in my life, I had just turned right instead of left. It’s just unacceptable to me. It has to mean something at least. And I told her that because of that, all I can have is regret, like I said. How am I supposed not to have regrets? And she told me, you can’t you’re bound to have regrets. And actually, I realized that yeah, maybe that’s just the truth, but for me, it’s unacceptable. It’s unacceptable that because of some asshole psychiatrists who injected me with things by force, forced high doses of medication into me, made me take it against my will I’m the one paying for it. I’m paying for their bullshit with my body, living in the hell of a body that’s now destroyed and causing me suffering 24/7, for the rest of my life. And then I even asked my girlfriend: so there’s no karma? It’s just me paying for this, and they don’t have any karma either? They screwed me over in every possible way, they violated me, they violated my soul by destroying me from the inside, and they just go on with their little lives? She said yes. And that’s just unacceptable to my soul. I want them to burn in hell, or at the very least to understand what it feels like to be a victim of their actions, and that somehow, somewhere in the universe, they know what it’s like to be in my place. I think that would be a sufficient hell for them being forcefully injected with medications that destroy you.

Thank you for your Reply, When I was forced by psychiatrists to take Abilify, I developed severe akathisia. What’s even more shocking is that despite my complaints, they continued to administer it to me by force. It’s disturbing when you think about it, because even in psychiatry, treatment is supposed to be stopped when a patient develops akathisia. I’m naturally very, very mentally strong. This isn’t arrogance I can endure levels of pain without complaining that 99% of people couldn’t. So I went through two months of torture. At the time, I still believed that once I got out of the hospital, things would be okay. But the worst part came after I stopped all the treatments: my body had become a machine of constant pain, as if it had lost all vital drive as if the energy was no longer flowing through it and I realized it was still happening even without the medication. And to clarify, the fact that I have hyperhomocysteinemia probably also played a role I was already starting from a very fragile baseline health-wise. (I agree I could not even have imagined one worst drug than abilify)

Thank you again, You know what? Even though, to be honest, I don’t really believe in it, I’m going to give it a try. I’ve got nothing to lose anyway, so I’ll go ahead and try this out. I’m a man of my word.

@integral thanks for your Reply When I think back to high school, the students who already knew they wanted to become doctors often seemed driven less by a deep passion for medicine than by what the profession represents socially. They were aiming for recognition, prestige, a certain idea of success and in a way, that’s understandable. At 16 or 18, committing to such a demanding path rarely comes from a fully formed vocation; it’s more often shaped by the strong social value attached to the role. In France especially, being a doctor is widely seen as a clear marker of achievement and status, and that perception can naturally influence early ambitions.

Another victim of this here. What’s crazy is I know the truth about this and I can’t stop the devil from fucking up lifes this way. There Will be other victims who would potentially just need one warning from me not to fall into that trap yet, they’ll fall into that trap and have their whole lifes detroyed. Some might say, “Yes, but you should have taken responsibility so you wouldn’t have ended up being forced into psychiatric care in the first place.” And yes, that’s true all of us who ended up in that situation made a mistake beforehand. I admit it, maybe we were a bit irresponsible in our use of psychedelics. But let’s be honest: that doesn’t deserve to have our lives destroyed over it especially when all we really needed was two weeks, maybe a month of calm without psychedelics. Once you are considered mental, whether they explicitemy say it or no, your life is considered less important, you are like an animal to them and they can do anything they want to you. This psychiatric environment is to the devil what a warm, humid climate is to mold.

@Ramasta9 I do, of course, more or less take really care of my body. I do my best I take supplements, I eat as well as I can, and I exercise as much as possible. But the reality is that all of this only slows down the deterioration of my body. There’s no magic formula; Superman is just a dream for me. But thank you, and yes, of course, I’ll take this advice, keep going, I’ll try the one week fruits then fasting eventhough it might be dangerous for me cause my cortisol is already always too high due to constant cellular stress but yeah maybe even refine my lifestyle to make it even healthier. Thanks again for your response.

I really hope. Would give me so much hope in this universe.

Men and women are interconnected, so reducing societal problems to one group oversimplifies a complex reality.

She is more truthful than I am. I’ve just been feeding fantasys of karma for the past 5years cause I can’t accept the truth of what happened. water fasting for 3 days won’t heal my body. Thanks for replying, I appreciate.

It’s been now 5 years that I live with that and I consider my Life to be wasted*

We were in bed with one girl friend*

lol, Leo was so right on this, you guys are just projecting your own lack of self control onto porn. There’s nothing wrong with having a healthy, balanced relationship with porn.

Fuck God, we don’t need him

Your blood test should at least contain that: Homocysteine Active vitamin B12 (Holotranscobalamin) rather than total B12 alone Folate / vitamin B9 (ideally RBC folate) Vitamin B6 (PLP) High-sensitivity C-reactive protein (hs-CRP) Fibrinogen Ferritin (can also reflect inflammation) Uric acid • Ferritin • Serum iron • Transferrin • Transferrin saturation TSH Free T4 Free T3 Reverse T3 Anti-TPO antibodies Anti-thyroglobulin antibodies Vitamin D (25-OH) RBC magnesium (more reliable than serum magnesium) Zinc Copper Selenium Fasting insulin HOMA-IR (calculated from glucose + insulin) HbA1c Morning cortisol DHEA-S SHBG Total and free testosterone Prolactin Alkaline phosphatase (ALP) – can reflect zinc status or bone metabolism Albumin Gamma-GT (GGT) Advanced lipid panel (ApoB, ApoA1, Lp(a))

But be careful: the medical system may try to refer you to psychiatry. You need to watch out for that and make sure you identify the physiological cause of all your problems. Once you are referred to psychiatry, the physiological cause may be buried under psychiatric falsehoods and mental paralysis caused by psychiatric medications. You do not want to end up in that situation. Take your time, try to stay calm, and find the physiological cause of your problem. That is your only mission right now.

What you have isn’t normal. There’s an imbalance in your body, and to me it seems more physiological than psychotic. Ask for a complete blood test truly complete. Most doctors don’t actually order a fully comprehensive blood test. You need to find a good doctor or a hospital doctor and describe your symptoms. Say that you’ve already tried many things, if that’s the case, and ask for a genuinely comprehensive blood test.

What you want may indeed be true in the sense that it is genuinely what you desire, yet in the end Truth holds far more than anything you could ever imagine wanting.

Thank you for solving it. You can still try to unite truth with love though. Even if it seems impossible, it’s still worth fighting for, since the reward appears so deliciously enticing.

The question of suicide is very complicated. In some traditions, there is no taboo around suicide; it is even recommended rather than living without dignity, as with the Japanese who practice seppuku. They opened their stomachs because they believed that this was where the soul was located, in order to leave a way out for the soul. So even in their beliefs, they still wanted to put conditions in place for the afterlife. Today, if we lived like the Japanese of that time, given the way we live without much sense of honor and almost constantly lying we would have to commit seppuku three times a day. I don’t know which of the two philosophies is better: « If life is no longer worth living, then it doesn’t matter. This life is only an illusion anyway. You can take it away at any moment, and you’re not going to live in an undignified way when you can die right away. It’s pointless. » Or the other philosophy: « as long as you breathe, fight. As long as there is a spark of life, fight. » A second question arises from the initial issue of whether suicide leads to hell, and whether the universe truly makes a distinction between dying by suicide and dying by other means. Does the universe even recognize such a difference? For example, imagine someone walking down the street and a murderer comes up behind them and shoots them in the head. Would their consciousness then be sent directly to some kind of paradise? But if the exact same thing happens except that the person is the one holding the gun and pulling the trigger would their consciousness instead be sent to a place of horror? In other words, does the universe really make such a moral distinction based solely on who pulled the trigger? Or even if the difference is not as extreme as heaven versus hell, might there still be some subtler distinction in how these two kinds of deaths are treated? I really don’t know Another concept that seems interesting when thinking about this question is karma. And yes, I realize that I am only working with concepts and beliefs that may seem elegant or plausible but that is really all we have to work with when discussing this topic. No one has ever died and come back to tell us what actually happens, or at least no one that we can truly verify. One elegant concept is karma. I don’t know about you, but at least in my own life or in life in general the idea of karma often seems to work surprisingly well. So why not extend that idea beyond life itself? For example, imagine a case where suicide might appear justified: someone whose body is completely broken. They are not dead, but their body has lost any real vitality, and they live in constant pain. Let’s say this person still has ten years left to live in this broken temple that is their body. Perhaps they are meant to go through those ten years. Perhaps if they endure those ten years and then die naturally, their next reincarnation will be completely “clean,” with good genetics and a healthy body. But if they end their life before those ten years are lived, perhaps their next reincarnation will be in a body with something like diabetes because they still have something they needed to experience that they did not live through in the previous life. Of course, these are only hypothetical ideas meant to illustrate a possibility. But even then, would it truly make such a difference? Living ten years in a broken, suffering body or having diabetes in a future life. Is it really worse to have diabetes in a future life? Is it truly worse to spend ten years in a body filled with suffering? In the end, does any of it really make that much of a difference?

Saying someone is acting weak means something. Saying someone is acting feminine means something else. And saying someone is acting like a woman has its own meaning in context too. I don’t automatically see misogyny or homophobia in that. It just sounds like he’s describing a kind of behavior I think it’s not that hard to understand that if you act like a woman, you won’t get women cause women want men.

It’s conformist to behave in a non-conformist way right after a video about conformity comes out.

Taking notes

It's just a question of timing. Once you had lots of sex and she's attached, share deep emotions and vulnerability, she'll love it but in the beginning, playfulness, confidence, humor, light atmosphere are kings.

Hi everyone, I’d like some outside perspectives on a situation that has been on my mind. I’m not looking for reassurance and I’m fully open to the possibility that this was simply a short vacation encounter that ended naturally. What I’m interested in is understanding the psychological dynamics behind what happened. Last week I was staying at a hotel in Morocco and met a girl there (she’s 28, I’m 30). The way we met was quite spontaneous. Around 11pm I was having a herbal tea at the hotel bar. She was there too, drinking a beer and talking with the bartenders. After a while she sat by herself at a nearby table. I wanted to approach her but didn’t really know how. At some point someone said something to her in Arabic and she replied in Arabic. I asked her what it meant, and that’s how I started the conversation. I then asked if I could sit at her table and she said yes. We started talking and it quickly became obvious we were flirting. The tension built up quite naturally. In front of the bar there was a swimming pool, and at some point we had the idea of going for a swim. It was technically forbidden at that hour and people told us not to do it, but we still jumped in anyway. We stayed in the pool for about 10 minutes before security asked us to get out. After that we had to go back to dry ourselves. Our rooms happened to be in the same area of the hotel, so we walked back together. When we reached her door, she asked if I wanted to come in, and I said yes. We ended up sleeping together that night. During sex she was very expressive and vocal (for example she was saying “habibi,” which means “my love” in Arabic). Afterward we cuddled and she was looking at me very intensely. Personally I felt a very strong connection in that moment. The next morning was my flight day going back to Paris. I left early because I couldn’t sleep much, while she slept most of the morning and even into early afternoon. Before I left she had told me I could knock on her door before my departure because I was flying home that day at 3pm. So later I came back and knocked. We had about an hour together. I suggested we go for a walk on the beach, so we walked along the beach and talked a bit more. During that walk we were both laughing a lot and she seemed genuinely sad that I was leaving. At one point we were joking about how it always seems that when you meet someone in a really intense way, the universe makes sure your paths separate quickly. We were laughing about how it’s always on the very last day of the trip that these kinds of encounters happen and that if we had met a few days earlier we probably could have spent two or three relaxed days together at the hotel. In fact, I even briefly considered extending my stay. I was supposed to leave Friday afternoon while she was leaving Sunday afternoon, so we technically could have spent two more days together. I thought about postponing some math lessons I had scheduled for the weekend, but in the end I decided it didn’t feel responsible to cancel work commitments just to stay longer with her not that I did not want to but it did not feel right. When we said goodbye I kissed her, and when I stopped she asked for one more kiss. Then I left and flew back home. She, however, stayed at the hotel for two more nights (Friday night and Saturday night) before leaving for London on Sunday. After I got back we continued messaging on WhatsApp. The conversation was playful and flirtatious. At one point she even sent me a sexy photo from her hotel room and we exchanged voice messages. She also said something like “I am a girl who gets what she wants 😉”. The last exchange we had was Saturday night. I told her my brothers had just come home and that I was going to spend the evening with them and would catch up later. She answered warmly and then asked me: “What’s your zodiac sign? I feel like you’re a Virgo.” I replied with a few short voice messages answering her question and joking around a bit. After that she never opened my messages again. The timeline is important here: Saturday night she was still at the hotel (while I had already left the country), and Sunday was her travel day back to London. From that point on, my messages remained unread and the conversation stopped completely. I’m trying to understand what could have happened psychologically. Some possibilities I’ve been considering: Maybe the interaction was simply a “vacation romance” that felt intense in the moment but wasn’t meant to continue once real life resumed. Maybe she met or slept with another guy during her last evening at the hotel and that experience overshadowed the connection we had. The hotel is known for having very attractive Colombian dancers who work there and who are reputed to hook up with many female guests. Maybe my attitude after we slept together came across as a bit attached or needy. I’m aware that neediness is unattractive, and I tried to keep things cool in my messages, but the truth is that I did feel a strong connection with her and maybe that came across in subtle ways. Maybe the energy simply changed once we both returned to our normal environments. From an outside perspective, what do you think is the most plausible explanation? I’m genuinely interested in understanding the psychological dynamics behind situations like this. Thanks.