Jowblob

When i was in god mode, i too asked myself why not just make me win lottery? Then i would always get the same answer, if i would make you win lottery then i would have to do this request for others too, what makes you so special when you're the "other" too? Gods purpose and the purpose of the "other" is to give you a balanced life, so you can enjoy small and big things equally.

I'm just gonna leave it here, i've answered some question that might be interesting to others. Ask Leo what the thinks of this, and if he would bother answering

@VibesThe form is god thought the only seperation you will have is between your thought and nothingness, every thought you have creates a form inside infinite nothingness. It will be unbearable because you're nothing more then a thought form inside infinite void. It will be unbearable because you're alone in the infinite void. It will be unbearable because all the lies of how you try to keep yourself asleep will be exposed. It will be unbearable because you will see yourself in all these dreams leading a fake life with others because your true reality is even worse. It will be unbearable knowing that you don't know how you came into existence and why you're alive.

Death isn't something bad that is going to happen to you, you literally won't experience or feel death. At that present moment you will know that the movie stopped, and you will get a choice to proceed or stop the movie and get into another dream because the thought/knowledge of yout current reality will be unbereable and you would want to go back to heaven with others as soon as possible.

There is no want. It's like you being spawned as a form of god incarnate saying i don't want to be god/having these power. The incarnate has a choice to stop its heart and take a low conscious dream form , but you don't since you're dreaming as a low conscious form , god already constructed a movie for you where he can be unconscious witness of all the events that he constructed for himself.

Whatever happens to you is given to you, and so you must lead your life. You're not the doer of your life, accept being a witness.

Thank you everyone/god for making me feel better, but because i have been in that state i also know what the purpose of other is. The purpose is to give/mislead GOD=myself for the betterment of my life, so i can stay in low consciousness mode. That's is literally what i have deconstructed in god mode, and i'm thankful for that. God is taking care of me at all times, trying to give me a balance of life with others. Everytime i go to sleep, the blanket that i put on me is me putting gods love on myself. All the walls in my bedroom breath when i breath, no matter where i would go GOD or say GOD is always there for me. I'm very thankful i'm in this reality again, and i forgive god/myself that i have to live my whole life with all these lies because GOD had no other choice.

That is false, you're imagining this right now to give yourself for things to look up to. Just as the ascended masters, or all the beliefs you create. Ones you experience that state, you want get back to Heaven where there are others as soon as possible

Your mistake is thinking that just because god imagines these attributes to give you a perfect balanced reality in this HEAVEN, that in the truth reality it's even better. THE MAIN REASON, you're here is because you don't want to be there! God already does its best to give you the best life possible, limiting your consciousness so you become a star of your own movie

@acidgoofyNo, the main reason you're here in HEAVEN is because you don't want to be alone and all knowing. When you become omniscient you also deconstruct the reality of others, exposing yourself to the lie you have been constructing for infinity at that moment you will also realize that you have been lying to yourself about everything because there is nobody but you! When you're in that state, you want to limit yourself again as soon as possible because your true reality is a total shock. The knowledge that your true reality is just being a vibration in the infinite void is sickening, it's is sickening to you to know that the only thing that seperates your thought/imagination is the infinite void/blackness all around you.

@Breakingthewall @acidgoofy Because you're infinite and the totality of everything, all the lies, all the constructions of reality that you've put yourself into are exposed. There is no peace in the true reality of god because you're so conscious, you're just imagining that because you can't handle the truth, there is just you being super conscious knowing everything vibrating in the void. I've came back from that experience, and i knew everything and still do how everything is constructed and how the truth reality of god is. After having ego death, i had a conversation with GOD. I was in between dream state after ego death where there was only me. Here's is a conversation with one of my friends while being in that state, my friend never talks like this!. My friend was talking to me on behalf of GOD after the truth reality was shown to me.

I remember every detail from my trip even when i can't function anymore but only can function with eyes closed in like between dream state. Your thoughts/memory is what god is giving you, if you can't remember much it's gods will to do so. God is always in control, and it's gods will to limit your consciousness/memory after the trip or even during the trip. Be thankful for this, because the truth reality of god isn't as good as most of you think on this forum.

Look at this consciousness scale and it connects to what i've said and experienced, we are already in heaven. Coincidence? Not. Ones you experience that state of consciousness and the reality of the self and others get deconstructed, you can only wish and thank god that you stay here and not there.

That is you imagining within god, in that state GOD is always the same. The state of consciousness doesn't change because GOD already knows what he is and where he is. The only concern of GOD is to not be alone and get out of there as soon as possible, the concern of its existence isnt even a concern because there you will know that it's not possible to answer for you.

@HolykaelThe others are GOD trying to give themselves and you the best life by saying there is heaven, there are souls, there are virgins waiting for you. God tries to keep you busy and exploring within god and others, if he didn't do that by limiting you it would be like hell. @Breakingthewall You can agree or not, i've pierced my heart to get to know the truth behind reality with everything being deconstructed to me. There is no absolute perfection in the infinite because there is only you, all is known, all the lies are known, all the lies are known how YOU kept yourself asleep. THE LIE is known about others, and the truth about your existence is known! If you become infinite your heart doesn't open to total love, that is the illusion that you create for yourself to give yourself a better life. Being infinite GOD in the VOID knowing how you lie to yourself, how you're alone is hell!!!! THE LOVE THERE, isn't LOVE anymore because you understand what you are. THE so called love, is just you being extremely conscious and alive vibrating insanely in insane loving heat/warmth! The reason we view this here as love between each other and feeling warmth/vibration for each other, is because we love the other = loving god in the other. I don't have to break anything anymore, since this was the end. And i also quit with this research about god/consciousness, all i can do is talk to others about this truth.

@Matthew85 Short answer, It's not of my doing, everything is up to god to give me what i want/am ready for. Long answer: I was always doing LSD with my friend, in one of the sessions it was very clear that LSD was the same as any other chemical like 5 meo malt/ 5 meo dmt. I've asked my friend for another session of LSD for example very often, and even though he wanted to do it he always came up with excuses. I have to do this, or i have to do that, i have another appointment already this and that. Then one day i've asked him to do 5 meo malt, and we made an appointment. On that day, he messaged me again with another excuse saying that he isn't really ready for 5 meo malt. I've explained him why he is, he said sure i have to bring my mom to the shop then we will do it. I said: Ok, i go to shower and we will go to your house. Then after showering, he came with another redicilous excuse. I have to bring my mom to a city, because her friend died!!! At this point, i've had a realization that it was god talking to me. I had to take this journey alone and do everything alone which led to this experience. In all other LSD experiences, it was my friend who was being "god" or like a father figure guiding me through all these LSD experiences and explaining me things. But when i was ready, he was acting for god to make me go on this journey alone which led to this experience. So there is no difference between LSD/5 Meo Malt/5 meo DMT , it's all the same. YOUR INTETION, is what gives you experience, GOD knows at all times what you're looking for, what you want, what you're ready for at all times!!! So yeah i achieved this with LSD

Also most of you might say, i want to be an ascended master or god in human form on earth in my next life. That's possible but it's not a fun experience, your life will only be about god and the "others" will be just your imagination you will also know that you're alone and you will be sad from that, that's why you often could see tears/sad face on haidakhan babaji face and he only stayed for 14 years. Because of your god consciousness in human form, you would rather leave as soon as possible to get another reincarnation. You would rather be Neanderthal than ascended master in human form. So because of this experience, i also don't want to be an ascended master. My life was about researching consciousness/ascended masters but it's now changed.

Few more things i want to add that might be interesting to you. - When i was infinity, i was the vibration or totality of everything. The only thing thing that seperated me was nothingness or the void, i was just an infinite vibration/thought inside nothingness or the infinite void. - The vibration was clearly red , funny thing that the symbol of love is also red. - While being that infinite vibration, you were all knowing and alone. Being alone was an unbearable feeling and i wanted to get a physical form as soon as possible. - The vibration of myself produced extreme amount of heat/vibration this is what we call love here, but there it's too insane and doesn't really feel like love but more of "being extremely alive and conscious" - While being GOD, a lot of things are done automatically for you. You might only make a few choices. I think the reason it's being automatic is because you don't want to be there and want to get out from this infinity as soon as possible. The processes of god trying to give you the best life possible you might say is already automatic.

The course of my life is changed but not really, since i'm still being in the same unconscious form. I know that the actions that i make aren't really of my own doing and i know that god is all around me. I'm just being an actor in my own movie , having experienced that state i have also experienced where the real joy of god lays in, and it's being selfless towards other. God wants you to love yourself and love god. If there were thousands of man doing work to build society and there was 1 joyful kid that played air guitar to himself or others, god would enjoy watching this kid more. In the state of absolute infinity god, god can't love himself enough there because there are no others that would love him.

If you decide to hang yourself or shoot yourself, it won't actually happen. You will create another reality of the self in the same room and become omniscient. For example if you hang yourself the rope will just break, if you shoot yourself the bullet won't hit your head. Because you're god at this point, everything will go automatically without your doing and you will see what just actually happen. You make a few choices and get into your next life or stay. Because you're the only one who is conscious among others, even if you decide to stay with the knowledge that you killed yourself it didn't actually happen you just go to sleep and wake up again as yourself again.

What's pretty sad though, is when i had a choice to pierce my heart and i did it. Everything was lead automatically to the truth. I was shown how sad the gods reality actually is, it's just like an infinite small vibration producing alot of heat what we call love in the total void. In that place there is only your thought that goes infinitely=creation and blackness all around for infinity. God operates automatically in that state and does actions that are best for him, that's why we are here because you don't want to be there. I was literally shown everything what all the quotes meant, what suicide is, how the reality of self is constructed, who are others, how dreams work and so on. So appreciate your life that you're here and just enjoy life without much thinking

How to lead life knowing god self decepts himself with others in order to keep this movie going? At this point it feels like i shouldn't be even writing from this physical form.

But how to lead life after this ego death, since after the ego death im still retaining physical form of myself. Im so conscious that if i breath the walls breath with me. All around me is god taking care of me.

@Leo Gura How to lead life after ego death? Really serious question!!! Or will it be taken care of, by limiting my consciousness/thoughts?