Cesco

I agree, but she tells me constantly that she wants to cut him off but when it comes down to doing it she feels bad and cant do it. She actually asked me to talk to her constantly in order to get rid of her need to talk to him. What im asking is if there are any possible solutions to help her do so

so my friend had loneliness issues a few months ago (about 6-7 months) and she started talking to guy who ill call paul. For the short term of about the last 6 months the relationship developed and developed and developed and eventually paul got head over heels in love but she didnt feel the same. After the loneliness issue was fixed because he was giving her constant 24/7 attention. He thought she was in love with him because of the crucial mistake she made of not being authentic and telling him that she wasnt because she felt bad and didnt want to hurt his feelings because he has her loneliness problemx1000000. So he kept constantly texting her and even when she told him that she needed to spend time with her family and other friends he wouldnt stop, and use guilt trips constantly. He also didnt let her talk to any other friends (male or female) because he had major jealousy issues as well and didnt want to lose her. Now, she started talking to me again because she sort of slipped out of his grasp but he was still around. After knowing that she was talking with me and literally a whole group of people she hadnt interacted with in months, he flipped his shit as you could probably guess and then after the tantrum he said he was sorry and the whole bit. This cycle repeats itself with her talking to other people and the relationship as a whole is toxic so i wanted to see if i could help it. The first solution was sending the guy self help so the first thing i did instinctively was send him the leo video on how to make friends, and of course he didnt bother watching it. Then i moved to trying to talk to him myself and he said he wanted nothing to do with me. And finally i tried a last ditch effort i tried to explain to him what hes doing is unhealthy and he needs to change it. Thats pretty much a basic summary of the situation. Now, she wants to stop talking to him but part of her feels bad because he indirectly helped her with loneliness so she doesnt want to let go. He also uses enough gilt trips to put my parents to shame, so that doesnt help. So im asking does anyone know any solutions to allow her to cut him off? Ive gotten her to block him on every platform but she has the inner desire to unblock him and talk to him which is the main problem. (note: There are parts of the relationship i havent fully explained, if you have any questions about it let me know)

Is there a difference with this if it is unhealthy green using these ideas and healthy green using these ideas?

But what defines conciousness for you

A friend of mine is INFP and seem to believe in guardian angles, tarrot cards, Ouija boards, magic crystals that affect her energy levels. I wanted to ask if this is stage purple or stage green. And if it is green what is the level of magical thinking on green and how does it compare to purple.

This makes a-lot of sense to me. I could remember having magical thinking when i was a few years old only 12 years ago. But could people skip stages if they are born in a family that is extremely integrated into one spiral stage. Pun intended

The “stereotype” you keep referring to and what I’m saying is not false. I have native blood in me I know how they thought. What I said is pretty accurate to what actually happened. They used to take their children and throw them in a forest to find out their spirit animal. And whatever interaction they had with an animal is their spirit animal. It may sound like I’m stereotyping, but it is what actually happened. Back to the point of this conversation, the woman in Walmart is apart of a society that grew past shamanism, and spirit animals, and all of this unpractical magical thinking. The reason you probably think I’m stereotyping is because of the way we sugar coat indigenous people because of how they were Mistreated a few centuries ago. But if you look past that event, the “stereotype” you believe I’m representing them as is actually accurate.

Because the society she lives in was able to go past survival mode. No?

Shamanism was the answer to any unanswered questions. Its very magical, which is what stage purple is about from what i now understand. If you take a caveman and put him in front of a tv, he will say its magic. If you take the twinkie woman from walmart in front of a tv, she will say its science. This is why she is higher on the model. An example of this magical and illogical thinking is the idea of dream catchers. They would make wooden circles full of string and say that if you slept next to it, it will catch your nightmares. From what ive gathered, red is higher than purple because it abandons shamanism, and magical thinking. If red is higher because of that general vague reason, (Theres other factors of course) then obviously orange being more advanced than red will be more advanced than purple.

What exactly does this have to do with spiral dynamics. Your essentially comparing two different people from completely different environements with completely different skills. The native with a spear may be skilled with a spear, but thats only because hes forced to in the circumstances he lives in. The fat woman in walmart buying twinkies is higher on the pyramid because she was able to stop worrying about surviving, and evolve. The native thinks only about the survival of the tribe.

The stereotype values that red represents seem lower consciousness than the stereotype purple values. With the example of an indigenous tribe, purple seems to be more organized and peaceful than red. Even showing a hint of a justice system with the social hierarchy in the families of the tribe. Red seems to just have the most savage and brutal ways of living compared to purple, so its unclear to me why its placed higher on the spiral dynamics chain. Another example of peace that purple had was when the english and french came to canada and the US to take over and met the tribes. The first nations were willingly trading with them and had no intention of starting war, until the english and french started converting them and ect. I feel like red would attack at first sight in the name of defending their territory. Which im certain happened in between the tribes, however it did not happen with the explorers. Also, when purple would attack an animal to eat or take something from nature, they would thank nature and appreciate the things given, which is something i could see blue doing in the name of god. Meanwhile red didnt give a shit about anything and just took it. I understand that morality is not the basis of conciousness, but im still confused. Can anyone explain?