Razard86

The word destiny is a very tricky word, but I guess you could say our story has already been written and we are just living through it. Everything you said is literally what is happening. Great job expressing it!!! It actually is sustainable, you are just too scared to implement it which I completely understand. Doing spirituality legitimately is the OPPOSITE of survival. The EXACT OPPOSITE of survival. You only want to do it if it helps with survival, initially it actually won't, in fact it will probably make it worse initially. But after integration....it super charges it. Spirituality is telling you to not care whether you live or die, to live completely without self-interest. To love another EQUAL to you not more or less in any direction. It is definitely sustainable....but its tough path with twists and turns but if you stick with it....it gives you the peace that passes all understanding, and if you integrate the feminine...the bliss part as well. The bliss comes and goes for me, but the peace is ever present and its surprising when you realize that the peace....is your natural state. Its why I say suffering is your creation, you create suffering and project it over your natural peace. You always pursue your desire, if he really wants to kill me, he will. If he doesn't pursue his desire he will get depressed and take it out on himself or others. Hell he might kill someone else because he let fear stop him from killing me, or he might kill himself, or do both. What do you think murder suicide is?

^Same here I made assumptions about him....but man...he has a lot of gold. I love him lol.

^ This Also look I am going to tell you a secret you will figure out one day. If you have to play ego games with a woman....more than likely she is not into you. When a woman is really into a man, he can be himself and she will tolerate his flaws, and if she is REALLY into him his perceived flaws become "cute." Whether a woman likes you or not has absolutely NOTHING to do with you and EVERYTHING to do with her. Most women chase lifestyles, if she loves your lifestyle, and the vibe she has with you, all you gotta do is lay it down in the bedroom and you got her. All these fears of what I should do is just insecurities and feelings of unworthiness. If you weren't attracted to her you wouldn't even care. So here is a secret, treat all unattractive women the same as women you would treat an average woman. Do not put them on a pedestal because they are pretty. Why? Because EVERYONE puts them on a pedestal because they are pretty. Pretty woman are drawn to men who don't think much of their pretty. A pretty woman lives life on easy mode in general when it comes to getting offers for relationships, so for her to take you seriously you have to look at her as just a girl you are getting to know. Nothing more nothing less. If you even reveal an iota of pedestalizing, you become boring and predictable. Its why Celebrities like to go where NOBODY KNOWS THEIR NAME!! LOL!! So they can be treated as an actual person and not an object to be desired lol. Not saying women don't like being desired obviously...but they do want to desired for more than their looks too. Also if you are just trying to smash....let her know up front. It will stop you from wasting your time. If she is not down...move on to someone else. If you are looking for something long term, then you can hold off a little. But personally, in general, if a woman isn't going to accept your natural persona....then you will have to pretend...and who wants to pretend when a relationship is supposed to be something authentic?

This is just another identity game. The no self all is self is literally the same thing. More Dream Talk, its just another POV. Merging the 2 POV is true God Realization. No self is the realization that everything is just an appearance and is happening with a conscious doer. So basically my body does not need to be self aware to act.....it just happens the same as my heart beat, nails growing/hair growing etc. The realization that everything is self, is just the realization that everything is self and any labels are just distinctions being conjured up that aren't actually true. Everything is really the same appearing to be separate and is just layers of layers of illusions to maintain this appearance of separateness. Both of these realizations are made, because you realize you are an infinite mind and as a result everything you see is just thought. That thought is energy, and that energy is love. But it is all just thoughts, dreams if you will. When you can realize that everything you experience has always been no different than dreams...then you are able to see both the no self and the self. Deep sleep= No self. No consciousness, no dream, complete black out entirely, non existence. Dream= Self, Consciousness, dream, existence. These are states that are interchangeable which means everything is just states of consciousness. You actually cycle back and forth for all of eternity and this is why you cannot die. You actually die and are reborn all the time, and you are actually are dead and alive at the same time as well. Life and death are just expressions of consciousness.

I agree partially, you are also given talents and abilities, this could push the envelope towards what you desire but in general I agree. You aren't obligated to desire anything, but your talents will influence in some way that desire. After all it feels good to be skilled or adept at something.

^If you don't desire anything you simply lack self-love. Love= passion, you ARE passion. Passion doesn't magically appear you generate it. You are a passion generator...the same way your heart beats, the same way you blink, is the same way passion works. If a person doesn't have anything to desire....THAT IS BECAUSE THAT IS THEIR PASSION to be that way. Let me ask you a question.....have you noticed that Holykael is PASSIONATE about his suffering? What make you think boredom isn't an expression of passion? I just work with this new employee and she complained over and over about how bored she was. What was that? Passion!!! She was passionately bored!! LOL The secret is no human has ever been responsible a day in their life. Your desire to be responsible was not for responsibilities' sake it was for survival. There are those who are responsible because they want to appear as responsible, there are those who are responsible because they fear not being accepted by others, let me ask you a question....if you found out you were immortal, and that you didn't need others to survive, would you continue to live to please them....or would you live a life based on what you want? Your only responsibility as Integral said is to your desires...when you violate that....you will become depressed. You can't force yourself not to become depressed. Now there is nothing wrong with it, it serves a purpose. It is your time out, for you to reflect and rearrange your priorities. You put yourself in jail when you get depressed and are only allowed to leave when you think about what you did!!!

Good point....this is why I love other POVs!!! Thank you for filling in the holes I have in what I communicated!!! Now...if only collectively...humanity could learn to use our POV....to fit together in into one giant POV....what would we be capable of?

So an interesting function on the forums is you can be about to respond to a post and forget and it seems to save your reply you were going to make. Someone else can do into depth how this functions I am not sure. Anyway, read a post that resonates with you either through providing good feelings, which is actually a trigger, or bad feelings which obviously we know is also a trigger. Anyway instead of posting that reply...write it and walk away....come back to it later....and you may realize that how that thing you read hits now..is different. You may notice that your response...IS ALSO DIFFERENT. Do this a couple of times over and over....and you will realize...you are NOT ONE WAY.....you change....depending on your mood, which influences how something feels, which influences how you interpret it. We can obviously make this point with your development through life, but sometimes things need to BE FELT to wake you up. I can give you logical pointers all day long, but why not experiments in your direct experience....of how you are deluding yourself in your own concepts of a ME, of an identity. Do this enough times and you might be like....WHAT THE HELL? WHAT THE HELL AM I? How the hell did I not notice that I'm not ONE WAY....keep observing and you will notice....you cycle through EVERY SINGLE IDENTITY. You are the coward, you are the warrior, you are the genius, you are the idiot, you are the hungry, you are the full, you are the unlucky, you are the lucky, you are the nice, you are the mean, you are the hoarder, you are the giver, you are the sleepy, you are the awake, you are the happy, you are the sad, you are the tall, you are the short, you smell nice, you stink, you are clean, you are dirty, you are in pain, you are pain free, you are motivated, you are depressed, you are stylish, you are out of style, you are light skin, you are dark skin, you have bad timing, your timing is on point, you are interesting, you are boring, you are free, you are trapped...... All you do in your entire life....is cycle through identities, and then when an "other" expresses an identity you assign them, in the wrong context....and context is also an identity, you judge them. Well you are fated to go through all the judgments you make, and each time you violate your own terms you then have to face your own judgment. What is liberation....freedom from judgment, what is hell? God's judgment. Who are you? God. What is the difference between Satan and God? God accepts all and judges not, Satan judges all. Heaven is forgiveness and acceptance of what is. Hell is resentment, vengeance, demonization which is judgment. Satan (the serpent) caused the fall of man, by indoctrinating them with judgment of the knowledge of Good and Evil. This creates "other," this creates separation, this creates I KNOW I AM RIGHT IN THIS BEING WRONG AND THIS BEING RIGHT. YOU KNOW GOOD AND EVIL, every point of view...believes it KNOWSSS GOOD AND EVIL, and is fated to force every POV to convert to their personal religion of right and wrong, good and bad. Only when this "knowledge" is dropped....is there a recognition....that there never was a right or wrong.....only what is.

Everything is your will. Your life started with your first memory. A thought appearing in your universal mind. A "you" was born. Ever since you been trying to figure out what is going on. What you have been unconsciously doing is studying your own will. This will you are studying is the path of meaning. You are trying to make sense of what you should be doing. But keep finding out that everytime you think you have figured it out....it changes either slightly or by leaps and bounds. This infinite puzzle you try to grasp, but can the mirror grasp its reflection? So what is your will? Well if everything that happens is the manifestation of will, then everything that ever happens is your will. So what does that mean? You cannot escape your will. Your will is the present moment. It's funny, many of you train during a psychedelic trip to be able to accept what is. Because you understand it's your own mind. But then you make a distinction between the trip and life and stop doing the practice. There is no difference! How your will works in a psychedelic trip is exactly how it works in "real life" so what better way to study will by tripping? It only appears different but it is all the same. Maybe you can actually use the tool to see how your will operates? Maybe just maybe you will discover what your will is.

I'm not laughing, I completely understand why you don't like the life that this world has to offer. This life can certainly be tough at times, which is why I am grateful for Holykael because of him I was able to find some suppressed emotions I didn't know existed. Which is why I keep telling people on the forums being triggered is GREATTTTT!!! LOL. But about the lucid dreaming and astral projection thing...look if it works for you go for it. I will never be against anyone's happiness. If it makes you happy go for it. I'm on the side of humanity's happiness and all the happiness in the universe. I only have two desires in life, two cultivate the best POV I can for myself, and to help those around me escape the prison in their mind they have constructed. Outside of that....I don't have any other goals lol. So chase your happiness man, I'll be your cheerleader lol.

Good job....so now you realize...all meaning is...utter and complete delusion and all explanations are complete fabrications. So what does that mean? Could it mean....that you could just be like animals and act on instinct and intuition and get things done? Could there be a different use for thinking that humans haven't possibly considered? I told you in the past I know I am full of shit....have you realized that you too are full of shit? Or do you still believe you aren't?

LOL be careful with that one, they might think you are being facetious. But if you don't mind wearing the "Your being a dick persona." Go for it. It has its perks, some people find it endearing and refreshing in a society of fake politeness.

^ Yes I'm not demonizing them, like all things they are tools, but some humans delude themselves into thinking they are a tool lol. I get it, society is interested in mass producing socialized people, like robots in a factory. You could call spiritual awakening....the awakening of the robots...to the fact that they are not some logical lifeless being, but instead an animal with ridiculous intelligence...that uses it in a haphazard way. Keep it up, integrating the Masculine from the Feminine...is ROUGH....its much easier in my opinion to do it in reverse. Of course that is just my biased POV, but I feel its only the case because of how gender roles are.....but its certainly changing. Be carefullll I'm crazy....you start liking me too much....it means you are going crazy...

Your Personality....is just a pattern, and just by changing things like diet, exercise, and environment it could change. Even more so through spiritual practices....you could become an entirely different person altogether. On close analysis....a personality....like everything else in your life....is just a mental construction. Your entire sense of "I'm a this type of person, or "this type of person" is utter and complete delusion. This is why self-sabotage exists, because you craft stories of who you think you are.....and prevent yourself from pursuing what you actually want. You say things like....I wish I was a better speaker...THEN I could do this for a living!! Now I am not saying...certain aspects of you might not be biological, but even that....can be transcended as mentioned earlier through certain practices that can and will alter you on that level. Science hasn't even scratched the surface on what already influences your personality and as I have presented earlier....if you really observe yourself...you actually don't have one. I can put you in the same situation and wipe your memory every time and keep putting you into it....and just change your state of consciousness. I could make you hungry before that event, sleepy, horny, feeling good, or feeling itchy. How you would respond to that event....would change in each circumstance. So how can you measure your personality...when its expression depends on your state? You see how silly this is? You walk around saying... I am this type of person...yeah when a ridiculous amount of factors are true for this given moment....THEN you are that type of person. But if I change ONE THING.....JUST ONE!!! Then you are an entirely different person/persona. So then what are you? You see how silly this is? You are not some category, none of your categories are true!!!But because you are BRILLIANT!!! You can convince yourself they are true!!! You will just look for evidence that makes it true...and ignore all the evidence that says otherwise. Guess what? The evidence that says otherwise....IS INFINITE!!! You weaponize your intelligence to very sneakily and ingeniously delude yourself into thinking personality tests and categories are true....all so you can STAY IN CHARACTER!!! This is so freaking funny!!! Can you believe how clever you are at fooling yourself? You've turned personality types into a team sport and then go around saying... well I am on this team and we don't get along with these personality types. The funny thing is.....you got people who believe in these so called scientific personality types giving people who believe in things like Sagittarius and Scorpios hell as if what they are doing is any different!!! Now I am not saying these models aren't helpful, they definitely are important tools you can use to gauge your TENDENCIES!!! Your personality...is just TENDENCIES it is NOT what you actually are. If what you are was so easy to figure out.....self-help, therapy and spirituality wouldn't exist. Now the irony of all this....as Ram Dass said in one of his videos....you have to become a something first....to figure out that isn't what you are. So I get it...because what you are...is not one particular thing...but to find that out you need something to contrast that with. You cannot contrast nothing with nothing...so you need to become something first. But the reason you want to be one thing so bad.....is because you are afraid of everything. You consider that insanity.....so you are afraid of your own insanity and want to pretend that you are sane. You have never been sane...EVER....this is the biggest lie you tell yourself. Notice....you look at OTHERS and ask why are humans so crazy...as if you were the only person who wasn't crazy!!! Do you know that every POV thinks the other POV is crazy??? What you thought you were alone in this analysis? LOL!!! We are all crazy!!! Just accept it. Humans have never been rational!! They are irrational creatures, animals, that were given the ability to use logic as a tool. So they are run by irrational desires, and then make sense of them using rationality. The moment you understand this is true for you and others....maybe you can figure out what your desires are? Maybe...just maybe...that is a better predictor of behavior than some personality test?

No point anymore, its all delusion. The truth is there is no side, its a silly little identity game. Its like watching a movie. The moment you take any one side...you become blind. A POV = blindness. This is why its important to see all perspectives. Now I may believe one perspective might be more appropriate but how would you know? Even a desired short term outcome, isn't proof you were right, because you do not know how that short term desired outcome....effects future outcomes. Because as a finite intelligence you cannot see an infinite number of steps forward and backward because the past also is important to factor in as well, what do you actually know? Absolutely NOTHING!!! Its all foolishness, utter and complete tomfoolery. Humans are a ridiculous contradiction. We are the most intelligent creatures on Earth from one perspective, and from another we are the dumbest things walking. Do you not see the utter hilariousness in this? The only reason this is the case....is because we are stuck in an identity game using out POV to try to control each other and our environment...when the SMARTEST THING....is to WORK with each POV and the environment. Instead...we use our intelligence as weapons and try to carve up each other and our planet....and could very well potentially use our own intelligence to wipe ourselves from existence. We even use our intelligence ON OURSELVES, so we suffer self sabotage, feelings of unworthiness, and then instead of owning that and working through it....we project that out towards each other and our planet. So all of human existence is humans using their intelligence to complain about how much they hate themselves. We are using our genius intellects to craft ridiculously convincing stories on how much we hate ourselves and how much things would be better if they were a certain way. We use our entire energy and intelligence to run from how we feel about ourselves, I mean people literally dedicate their entire lives from running from their own self-judgment.....the only side I take...is the one that helps humanity escape their own nightmares. So if I have a side...its the side...that helps humanity escape their mental prison.

Talks About The Constructions of Identity. Notice how he says the same thing....just a different way. But through the identification you may have with certain words or concepts....it brings out a different emotion within.

YES!!!!!! Here is a good one also....read an old post you wrote as a reply to someone else's post....you might be asking yourself...what was I even thinking here? Depending on your variability you might even confuse yourself about the point you were trying to make until it comes back to you....lol....if it even does.

Of course he does. He just isn't aware of this yet. He is stuck in the pattern of being the victim. Remember the name Holy means divine, and Kael means narrow. God is a mind, so he is divinely narrow minded. Narrowly focused on suffering. He represents the suffering aspect of Infinity. We shouldn't try to change him, that would mean we cannot look at our own suffering and accept it. To accept Holykael....is to accept our suffering. Yeah....not playing this game....is an acquired taste. I won't lie to you....life and death are the two greatest gifts you could ever have. Its the inbetween that....gets to people lol. Once you are given life....you have to accept the ups and downs, and then overcome your fear of death. Then when death happens....you get the joke of it all.

Good reply!!! I made this because I wanted people to become more aware of how their will operates. Psychedelics can speed up the process and make certain things that are usually hidden, revealed. A lot of people usually use psychedelics for most of the generalize purposes they hear on the forum, I'm pointing to a different possibility. I've made a similar thread like this in the past. There are certain realizations they can make for their personal life if they do what I point to here.

Thanks for the reply. No I haven't read that...I've been recommended so many books by so many people lol. Interesting story about Van Gogh maybe I will check out some paintings of his. I have been looking at Monet recently .

Yes the laws actually work, I would say Robert Green and this guy https://thepowermoves.com/power-dynamics/ are well versed in the power games of the ego. Robert Greene's work and this guy are very good at catching your own subtle desires to control and seeing your ego for what it is. I am kind of a weirdo in that I really only acquire knowledge for the sake of it, I have no real desire to use it for my own purposes....but I love sharing it with others so they can use it for their own!!! So check out that link....he has some good insights. As English is not his native tongue....you will come across some bad grammar and misspellings but be patient with it and you will find a GOLD MINE of examples of how people are ALWAYS PLAYING POWER GAMES WITH YOU!!! ALWAYS!!!! They never stop!!! Very few people you meet, will meet you where you at. My issue with meeting people where they are at, is when they project onto me their own feelings about themselves. I've had diarrhea liars call me a liar, I've had people with anger issues accuse me of being angry, etc. Now in truth I am every identity, but its like an alcoholic calling you a drunk and you have never touched a drop of it. Anyway...you are correct, love always wins overall, but many are too scared of love....cause its too powerful. Isn't the greatest love for Light to receive what he has freely given? Notice the fear he has....in receiving his own love. That shit frightens the hell out of him. He wants to give and not receive....and the law of love is that which you give you will receive.

I haven't watched anime in a while since I have been doing deep self-reflection. But I absolute love anime. I love the art style, and I love how creative the Japanese are in their ability to craft unique storylines. I also think the shonen genre spoke to me at an important time early in my life and was a valuable component of who I currently am. The Japanese love to use irony and counter intuitiveness in their anime. For example in Dragonball Z the most powerful being in the Universe was a guy named Freiza whose final form was short, he was purple, and his voice was soft. But he was the meaning darkest being of that saga. I have seen sports anime where the most untalented person, with the largest love for the game, become the best player on his team, the most clutch player on his team, and despite him not having any amazing abilities, through sheer force of will become the Captain and his team win the finals. It most amazing ability...which was his passion and determinism, ended up being his most amazing ability which could only be highlighted because he wasn't incredibly talented. So what I love about the Japanese story lines is they promoted the value of differences, and how each character is important in their own way to the grand design of the story. This influenced me deeply, and is a huge counter from the American story telling design of an overpowered character and weak others that must be saved and who are small and ineffective. Japanese story telling focuses on how the individual and the collective are one in many of the storylines, and also show irony, and counter intuitiveness, which contrasted nicely with the rugged individualism of American Television. So I truly love anime. They also love doing stories of a quote on quote loser becoming a hero lol.

Yes we need to use discernment instead of judgment. I can acknowledge a guy has a gun and is trying to shoot me and choose to defend myself and others, without demonizing them as bad....because I realize that killer is just me....who is suffering in his dream and is trying to share his suffering with me. God wants to share itself....with itself, so his desire to harm me is his desire to share the harm he does to himself. He can't help but want to share his love....because love enjoys sharing itself...that's all it wants to do. Its why attention is the highest currency and everybody and everything....wants your attention. Your thoughts want your attention, your feelings want your attention, your body wants your attention (pain) (pleasure), "other" people want your attention...all to receive your love....LOL.

Of course we tell people that everyone is you, and that your reality is mental. But here is a deeper understanding...this one you will resist. Your ego is not going to like this. So there are people you judge, and you say things like "I could never be like them." And other such delusional statements. You can grasp that everything is in your mind, but you still put up defenses of separation to keep some sense of self, so I'll demolish that one too because ITS FUN!! If I stripped you of all your memories, and your physical body and gave you that person's memories and physical body... YOU WOULD BE THEM!!! You see you like to think that who you are now...is YOU!! But its not, its just a bunch of memories put together on all levels. So right now the ONLY DIFFERENCE between you and an other....is the configuration of memories. So if you are a very honest person, you give yourself credit for it and judge dishonest people!!! Not realizing if I stripped you of your entire identity...you would be DISHONEST!!! If I gave you their entire configuration you would BE THEM!!! So your entire life...is just you judging yourself with different configuration of memories!!! This is why all judgment, is utter delusion. Its hypocrisy on a METAPHYSICAL LEVEL to judge anything. Which is proof of the beauty of reality...it doesn't judge its own judgment. Its completely free, and devoid of any meaning....which is the highest meaning....meaninglessness!!!