Nilsi

Hahaha yeah I find that way of talking quite grotesque as well.

Thank you I don't stress about this too much, but obviously it comes to mind sometimes. I feel very blessed to be able to kind of experience a bit of both world's, I'm just trying to go one step at a time. I heard this quote recently, which may just be the biggest cope ever, but it kinda stuck with me: "Most people try to do as much in as little time as possible; God tries to do as little in as much time as possible" - that's what eternity does to you I guess

I'm getting a bit emotional right now, so excuse me for hijacking this thread, but I think it actually fits quite well. My fantasies have been shattered enough times at this point, to where I know that I'm not awake right now. But the thing is, I really want this life, I want to have a wife at some point and maybe even kids. I want to be an old man and sit in my chair and talk shit to the youngins about the "good ol'days." I know what I am, and I will always know this in my heart, but I don't want to end up in some freaky indistinct dreamscape where suddenly the trees turn into aliens or shit like that. I'm just worried that if I fully let go this will happen, and that's really not what I want this to be. Maybe this is just irrational fear, but sometimes things are just getting weird beyond what I'm comfortable with. That's kinda my take on why I limit my consciousness. Im curious how you veterans out there think about this.

Damn, I'm sorry you're struggling so much friend. What's your endgame with this, if I may ask? Don't you think you could slowly drop these crotches and get more comfortable with yourself? I actually found good posture, breathing deeply (think Schmachtenberger), doing Hatha Yoga and generally getting more comfort in my body makes me a lot more resilient, although maybe I'm not as caught up in it as you are yet.

Do you think this is necessary to keep you sane? I'm just curious because I'm kinda doing the same thing with coffee and cigarettes, it gives me a lot of comfort and I feel more in control, but I would kinda want to be a better role model to those around me. Whenever I try to quit I'm quickly reminded why I put on that safety measure in the first place though.

That was beautiful, thank you I randomly happened to be listening to "Love Never Felt So Good" by MJ, while reading your post Life is the damndest thing sometimes.

In my experience, yes (there is more like a giant bit of improvement though (or at least change)), although I'm sure there are much higher degrees of awakening, where it may be a different story. For me, when it happens it feels absolute and final, but after a while I'm somehow back again. I've learned to have a sense of humor about it and not question it too much. I used to feel bad for playing these games, but now I see that there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, and I fucking love it. Sometimes I'll just randomly have a cessation or some awakening will creep in, and it definitely fucks with my head sometimes, but overall I'm just going with the flow and trust that it's all okay. You definitely have to be really flexible and willing to change your whole life on the fly, to be anti-fragile enough for this work, I would say.

I like this a lot. This dovetails nicely with James Carses notion of the "Infinite Game," if you're familiar with that.

It's the same shit that happened with the emergence of the internet all over again, when the old folks were claiming "CDs/the newspaper will never become obsolete!" - only this time the implications are potentially much more serious.

Exactly. There will be a lot of pissed off people, that are looking for some purpose in their lives. Already, 42% of the world population is under age 24 and with the rapid increase in population size, there will soon be a lot of young educated people that find themselves in a world that is heading toward disaster, and they certainly won't be happy about it. That's actually great news - the time is ripe for a revolution and if we don't fuck this up, it could be exactly what we need.

I'm with you on this. People in charge do seem to care, but they can't really escape the game theory. I don't have the answers either, and I don't want to be the kind of guy that just stirs up panic, so believe it or not, but I'm actually trying to figure these things out and make something happen. It's just not so easy and definitely can't be solved at the level of this particular issue. What's required here is basically a fundamental shift in worldview across the board, a world revolution one might say.

Just make people believe that this already exists and soon everybody will be on their best behavior

That's not a very convincing argument. They have a monopoly thus far, so they don't have any incentive to create a function, that would likely cause some backlash. Once there is competition, someone will inevitably seize the opportunity to get ahead by allowing this and soon everybody will join the party. That's at least how these things have always gone historically, which brings it back to my point of needing to fundamentally rethink the whole incentive landscape and preventing these arms races from starting in the first place.

I haven't either, but I've heard it multiple times now from people I know, so take it with a grain of salt. I'm from Germany and what I can say is, if you're not white, the odds are not in your favor. I've seen countless arabs and black folks getting rejected for no reason whatsoever, and a staggering amount of doormen here are skinheads, that won't make a secret about their preferences.

Thank you. I hope you have a nice day as well

I'm always happy to self-correct and be called out when I'm being arrogant and self-absorbed (which definitely happens), but I truly don't see it in this case. I was mainly pissed off by you calling submissive men "super disgusting," but I'm not going to argue that further. Let's just move on with our life's, shall we?

Why are you making such a scene of this? You went out of your way to be dismissive for no reason, and I called you out on it, so don't play these games with me.

I'm not looking to take control of anything. You can have your opinions, but you don't have to be an asshole about it.

You are allowed your opinion, but you could also just not be so dismissive of people that don't fit your heteronormative worldview.

Frank Yang is integrating meditative and contemplative work with strength training. Might be worth to book some sessions with him and pick his brain.

Maybe I'm naive, but to me, the greatest joy is still living an adventurous, meaningful life. I can bliss out whenever I want, but I'm still so fucking young and have so much energy and potential - why not go on an odyssey and put on a good show, instead of sitting on your ass all day, doing nothing? It's not that I lack anything, I'm just motivated to do it for it's own sake.

Assuming you will keep growing and developing yourself, your girl will either be so inspired and intrigued, that's she will naturally become more curious and open to it; or you two will grow apart more and more.

Check out Terrence McKennas book "The Food of Gods," if you're interested in this hypothesis. He goes to great lengths to qualify this hypothesis and provides a lot of anthropological and archaeological evidence, that makes it sound quite plausible. It's still quite ambitious and speculative (as most of his work is) and seems to me more like an interesting thought experiment than anything.

In a nutshell the ego is just a subset of infinity that you identify as. Your sense of self can expand to the entire web of life, but that's still ego. The demonization part is slightly problematic, but it's done for your own good. The ego is part of what you are and you should nurture and love it and facilitate it's development, just like you would with your child. Ultimately you will have to transcend any attachment and identification, if you want to fully recognize you own infinitude (though you can - and I recommend you do - always come back and work on your development).

This is some of the best musicianship I have heard, EVER. I cannot recommend this album highly enough. If there is such a thing as TIER 2 music - this is it If you're looking for more great contemporary lyricless music check out Olafur Arnalds, Jon Hopkins, Ben Böhmer, David August, Max Richter - all great artists.