axiom

It gives people more to work through, but it can also be a catalyst for the deepest introspection. The most “spiritually gifted” people I’ve met suffered through horrendous childhood abuse then spent a couple of decades untangling it all. What can be a hindrance at first can be an enormous advantage later.

Flakiness stems from low self-esteem.

Yes, but the point is that the brain does not check the environment at all unless its model throws up an error. Your phenomenological world is almost entirely concocted by inputs that began their life within the brain itself. Like a self-feedback mechanism. Snake eating it’s own tail, ourobouros…

That is because they collapse the default mode network (subject and object, the sense of ‘I’). The monkey mind settles down significantly, sometimes to zero depending on dosage / substance. Activity in other brain regions related to focus can increase though.

At some point, when it is realised that there is no end to this rabbit hole, the hollowness that arises can lead to seeking inwardly, and this can lead to awakening. And thereafter they can be appreciated for their simple, entertaining beauty. Like shadows on the walls of Plato’s cave.

@RMQualtrough Yes, infinity and nothing are inseparable. Death is life. Life is death. That which asks "Is death possible?" is already dead, and has always been dead.

Before contemplating whether death is the end, it is probably worth contemplating how life is possible in the first place. How the F*$% can something be created out of nothing at all? Surely that is impossible? You're not wrong. Life is an utter impossibility. Now, contemplate how it is that you're sitting there reading this.

I don't recommend self-administering iboga. A few years back I witnessed someone undergoing seizures every two minutes for 36 hours straight. They were very lucky not to die.

@AnthonyR I've had some very, very similar experiences. The terrifying time loop of madness is the result of traversing infinity and finity. On mushrooms, it usually occurs during the comedown, i.e. coming from a place where time doesn't exist into a place where time does exist. Unfortunately this can be the price of entry to these profound states on shrooms. To become human again, you have to re-engage / reimagine time, but to begin with it can barely stretch out for two or three seconds. It's a bit like light trying to escape from a black hole - it keeps getting sucked back in. Psilocybin can be insanely powerful and profound. It sounds like you went to levels of insight ordinarily associated with DMT etc. Not too surprising as all these molecules are incredibly similar...it's all about the dosage. Some substances work more quickly and can push you back into the body more quickly too. The nausea on shrooms can be quite extreme at these super high doses. Personally I found that the love energy was almost too much to take. People sometimes say that entheogens allow them to see themselves through God's eyes - that they get to feel how much they are loved (by God). As you pointed out, this is because the source of the love is actually you. It is extreme self-compassion and self-love, usually separated by the veil of duality including time etc. It's a blessing that you got to experience this. Divine Grace. I know it's a huge amount to take on board, so my thoughts are with you too. You may find that over the next weeks and months some unexpected emotions come up. It's all part of integration so I suggest you go easy on yourself, take a few long walks in nature, try to relax (and maybe don't dive back in to psychedelics for a little while...)

@Michael Jackson Not a meditation retreat per se, but Jim Newman has a five day retreat in Sharpham in a couple of months: http://www.simply-this.com/next-meetings/england-residential Jim is very entertaining. If you've ever wanted to get all of the most annoying non-duality teachings in one place, then it may be worth a visit. I'm probably going myself.

God is everything and nothing. Infinitely lonely and infinitely complete. Q: Is God ‘X’ ? A: Yes. Q: Is God *not* ‘X’ ? A: Yes.

I always thought Kundalini was some ridiculous spiritual woo-woo, but the more I’ve been reading, I’m beginning to wonder if I’ve actually been experiencing Kundalini at various times over the past year. Would love to hear others’ direct experiences of Kundalini energy to compare notes. How would you describe it? Thanks in advance.

This is what I’m getting at re the dread:

Thanks for the insights. I don't think what I'm experiencing is Kundalini in that case. Mine feels more like moderate anxiety, dread and a certain lively buzziness. It comes in waves and spikes a couple of times a day. Started shortly after a massive dose psychedelic trip a year ago in which I beheld God / infinity. Every so often, vague recollections of the sheer magnitude of that trip seem to sit just at the edge of my awareness, stirring these indescribable feelings.

@RMQualtrough if it already exists it couldn’t be shown to be alterable by measurements taken now… but it can. That’s the shocking thing about the Quantum Eraser. The now is the source of all. It is the origin.

The most I've ever taken was around 6 grams. I visited the hyperdimensional DMT realm, met God and felt its infinite love and compassion which had me writhing around in agony and ecstasy. I totally forgot that I was human. I was gone for what seemed like thousands of years, and was extremely shocked to remember that I was a human when I finally came around. I thought that my experience was inevitably going to be talked about all over the world, and that it would be heralded as proof of heaven or some such thing. As i sobered up I realised this probably wasn't going to happen. It just seemed so real, so important and so profound that I cannot begin to imagine what taking 16 grams would be like, nor the point in doing so. Seems utterly pointless and irresponsible. Maybe in the video above they were fresh not dry? That would explain it. 1.6g dry weight would be a decent dose for introspection and can get pretty intense.

Each time a character switches itself off it seems to lose some of its power, but you cannot control anything the character does. In fact the more you associate with the character the further away you get.

You are confusing the game architecture with reality. As a character in a story, of course time appears to exist. Time is one of the most compelling illusions going. It can't be experientially denied by a character.

@RMQualtrough@WokeBloke I've referenced this elsewhere on the forum, but it's a relatively mainstream view now that time is illusory (see Carlo Rovelli) In quantum mechanics, causality can be shown to run backwards. The past is restructured according to measurements taken in the present. (See John Wheeler's Delayed Choice Quantum Eraser). This moves the ultimate locus of causality to the present moment alone. So, the present moment alone holds all causality and all metaphysical glue for both the apparent future and the apparent past. Assuming you're an idealist - or better yet an acosmist - you will already be quite comfortable with the idea that all measurements and observations are ultimately made of thoughts, since they must be processed by thought to qualitatively exist. Watch this and see how "billions of years" of apparent history can be apparently altered / don't become "real" until they are measured (or "thought up") in the present moment: Quick thought experiment: How much "past" actually is there? Think of your own autobiographical past and you'll realise that it's a soup of fragmented, low-resolution memories. If you've kept a diary over the years then you may remember a little more. How much of the future can you imagine? Is the future clearer in your mind's eye? Why / why not? Could it be because both are imaginary?

@RMQualtrough Spot on.

@Matthew85 You have recognised that the steps are illusory, and now you are asking how to skip them. The answer is to stop looking for the steps.

@Matthew85 You are asking how to bypass the illusory chains of causation by using a method. Any apparent method necessarily involves reinforcing those chains.

@r0ckyreed Yes, within the game, motivation and desire and "success" all appear to be interrelated in some sense. You can become extremely proficient at the game. But it's just a game, and the purpose of the game is to feed you dopamine just frequently enough to keep you hypnotised into believing you are the game character, and to keep you playing. You don't need to grow. You are already perfect. You can't grow anyway except within the game. I am talking about transcending the game. Moving the locus of attention from the character to the player.

Good example. Same thing said another way: "What is a poiuyt?" I don't know. "Is a transwoman a poiuyt?" Yes, obviously. "Then what is a poiuyt?" I don't know.

The body needs desire to survive, but you are not the body. All of the things you've ever desired from the world were part of an effort to seek love and completeness, but they are mere shadows compared to what is truly real, and truly yours already. Desirelessness is not something to attain. It is what already is. Acceptance beyond acceptance, love beyond love.