Sugarcoat

Spirituality in general is confusing. Have you noticed every person that writes has like their own unique interpretation of it? It’s like we all speak our own language. I notice this both here and in spirituality forums on Reddit. I’m okay with not knowing, with being confused though , so it’s not a problem. But damn there’s so many ways to speak of the same concepts, for example the idea of consciousness, let’s not even start with that

From my own experience I feel like the self is an imagination of the brain. The brain is imagining a self. At least how it’s for me. Like constant self imagination. Changes in brain changes self structure I’ve experienced that, so it’s like the self is the brain. Brain imagining itself. Consciousness is awareness of self, property of the self, it’s dependent on an other too. I have particularly strong self imagination tendency . Been like it all my life. Like breaking the wall said, psychotic duality, I swear it’s like that. It feels I’m gonna explode at times like I wanna rip my brain out Like I’m really struggling to focus right now my brain feels scrambled

At least you got some clarity about it

Damn yall advanced I only know of asking ChatGPT questions and I barely ever use it, haven’t really caught up to this AI thing

If someone tortures me I can’t help but feel it’s bad. How can my mind help me by being quiet? Even in between the thoughts I will suffer

It’s a medical definition right? It’s not a slur or a judgement

Yea no judgement here either… ofc in general society should move toward healthier eating compared to today… If you feel negative effect from a little junk then stay away. I personally don’t feel weird if I eat a little McDonald’s so I don’t know what would cause it in your case, if it’s some internal sensitivity

He speaks of a mental gain from what he does, like a callous of the mind, mental toughness that seems like internal reward so I think he would be the same if nobody knew of him. I’m not sure though

So first you say there’s a difference between the selves then you say they’re the same Is self related to thoughts? I think so too in my experience maybe I’m caught in details here haha it’s fine

just because many people work like that doesn’t mean I do

lmao what that even mean

it’s def a big shit. Well on that topic, do you know of any good way to deal with physical pain? Any tricks from Mr mystic ?

I think u can do it solo

Yea like my family seems pretty content meanwhile I walk around quite miserable all of the time and wanna die . So yea absolutely you can be happy in duality.

If there’s a self it’s a ~separate~ self how else is there a self? And for me it seems real then if it’s actually real I can’t know.

I’m definitely not free damn I’m so trapped in duality! It’s so obvious! I’m the queen of duality I’m so fucking dual!! All the time!!! Duality is all I know!!!!

Yea it’s good to review one’s diet

Yea I get what you mean but that’s still on perception level it’s still dual

Duality is so freaking obvious. My guess is that it can be equally as obvious as they say non duality is for those who have realized it. I feel like I exist every second of every day. It never leaves me. I never forget about myself. I never loose myself in something. I’m always here, watching from behind the eyes. I’m constantly here. It’s so obvious. I’m so freaking trapped in duality. Like I can’t get out of this duality dream or whatever it is. It’s like rock solid. More solid then the objects around me. I think about these things all day long. But you know what I’ve noticed? No amount of contemplation makes any difference, no amount of listening to non duality talk does a difference. Because it’s all words. It doesn’t shake anything. It doesn’t shake this self structure that my piece of reality is seemingly dreaming up 24/7. It’s so rock solid no word breaks it apart. It’s like all the thinking I do is happening within the dual dream I’m trapped in. I think I need psychedelics. And hard ones at that. I think that’s my only chance of breaking this structure. I could do meditation and I did in the past. But I don’t have a strong enough desire for it so I don’t do it anymore to be honest. I could if I wanted but I don’t want to. I enjoy contemplation more but as I said it doesn’t make a difference. My guess is psychedelics are stronger anyways

I don’t see the door lol why am I being funny

Yea it’s like problems comes with having a self it’s the source of problem. I remember when I was a child and the sense of separation was stronger (sounds counterintuitive but that’s how it was for me) I had this existential anxiety that wasn’t related to any particular situation. So in your case yes it can relate to feeling separate, although it would be good to get clear about what it is specifically you’re paranoid about. If it’s something in particular because then you can tackle it better

Non dualist schizophonia has stepped in

People don’t recognize how much their identity plays a role in their emotions, opinions, ideologies, reactions etc. It’s like the identity survives on precisely unawareness of it.

I eat junk on weekends. I’ve been lowkey wanting to minimize it even more to optimize my diet more. I eat healthy during the weekdays though . I feel healthy regardless.

Yea keep exploring and hopefully you’ll find some solution This dual dream comes with its fair share of suffering yea