Sugarcoat

Why you said before you had sex you liaa😂😂😂

Yea, I think it could be both. Maybe feeling like you have to maintain your self image in the eyes of others can be a contributing factor

Yesterday I did intense cardio on the treadmill. Highest incline, high speed. I tried to push myself hard. Not gonna lie, I notice a tendency in myself that I seem to have this “limit” that I reach, and then I stop. I wanna push past that limit sometime. I will try again soon. It got me thinking of suffering. How what separates the average from the pro is the ability and willingness to suffer. The king of this topic is the one and only David Goggins. I don’t aim to be like him because he basically has tortured himself (he once ran so hard he got rhabdo and kidney failure, pissing blood, broken feet etc) but he’s still really cool and I think he is the baddest m*cker. There’s even something spiritual about this. Like I hear about ultrarunners hallucinating while running, seeing all kinds of stuff. It’s almost psychedelic. Maybe there’s something to it. Like David Goggins said here he “unlocked another part of the human mind”: https://youtube.com/shorts/g8OdN9e8ttk?si=6kPeuMF9ZIDmzqga Stay hard!

Something I have reflected upon is that I think for the average person non duality is actually part of their daily life but it’s just not noticed. I don’t include myself in this group of “average people” because I’m different so I don’t share this experience, which I won’t go into here but anyways…. I talked a little on reddit about this and someone said : ”Your sense of self does go away, but unless you’re LOOKING for it, you probably wouldn’t notice it. It’s very hard to notice the ABSENCE of something”. Basically I believe that the self is not constantly in the awareness of the average person, but it reappears often enough and quickly enough for it to seem like it always exists. And as the person said, it’s hard to notice ABSENCE. Those moments of absence are for example FLOW STATES that a person can get into, for example if they’re playing a video game. It could be by being IMMERSED in something, like watching a movie, or listening deeply to a lecture in school. Basically states where we can get so immersed in something outside ourselves, that we forget ourselves, we are no longer aware of ourselves. But it’s like we don’t NOTICE this. We don’t notice how it’s a non dual state. Or is it? Am I wrong here? What you think? Do you think non duality is a part of life for the average person but it’s not noticed/recognized?

@Yimpa he is

@Schizophonia I’m in another city for a trip with my family . We are at a hotell and they have amazing breakfast buffet. Tomorrow I’m gonna eat sandwich, eggs, sausage, pancakes, overnight oats yum

@Schizophonia you looked fine

@Breakingthewall I needa quit talking and start realizing..

Oh to reach that place…

Yea people say different things..

Hard to not judge pain

I bet you looked edgy with those dark under eye circles I think you’re lying it’s actually a French delicacy but you’re too embarrassed to say

Who knows what babies know…

I see

Omg why do they do that?????!

I doubt if it actually happened I’ll look him up

Women tend to have more options when it comes to sex that’s pretty much it

It’s ok

It’s in my lone wolf independent nature to not care what people think. Maybe what you say fits more younger people, I’m imagining stereotypically like college culture, because for example I work at kindergarten with middle aged women and they seem pretty genuine to me, with balanced egos . Maybe it lessens with age and the maturity that comes with that

Eyyy who let you just write out my problems like that😂 I don’t have derealization/depersonalization btw although it’s similar to it. The rest was right

Could be or not

79: I need to activate my inner David Goggins. He is prime example of persevering through adversity https://youtube.com/shorts/g8OdN9e8ttk?si=4CTsjVtbDwoPnjhL I love this particular edit of him. The music in particular

@Schizophonia is there anything that could make you suicidal? Or are you very strong? I can get suicidal (I was today) because I feel this SEVERE CONSTANT disconnect from myself, which causes like a depressed state, a dull state, apathy lack of emotion etc, emptiness.

Which others? Yes it has been a bad day for me too. Cried a lot which I don’t usually do. Usually I feel better in evenings so I feel a bit better now

I wish i could laugh