Sugarcoat

I’d like to receive infinity for my birthday

If you are healthy. If you are in the prime years of your health. If you have strong healthy digestive system. If you’re not sensitive, then you shouldn’t really feel a difference when you eat a little junk sometimes. If you do, if you feel it makes you slower, sluggish, affects your ability to think, bloated etc, it probably means you are sensitive, don’t have the best digestion, maybe have some chronic illness, aren’t in the prime years of your health etc. So don’t blame the food…. It’s your body that isn’t in the best shape: Because a healthy strong body should be able to handle some crap. I notice this in myself. I can eat a little crap sometimes and I feel no difference in my state. Because I’m top healthy so my body can handle it. Dont come on here thinking you got some exceptional interoceptive awareness making you notice the most subtle changes. Maybe it’s possible, but most people don’t have that so…

Could you briefly summarize

I’ll just need a few years studying French then I’ll get back to you alright gotcha

It takes a lot to overcome one’s problems. For example I had social anxiety and it took me like 4 years of consistent work and emotional labour to finally overcome it. The weird thing is that for me that required a certain degree of self dissolution. Because think about it, if you’re going to change something deep about yourself, something has to die off, and for me it looked like layers to my ego. So it’s a bit of a spiritual process too. If I were to break it down to its core, I’d say it’s important to observe yourself closely, so you can understand the mechanisms behind why you do like you do, the thought processes. Neutral observation also becomes like a practice of detachment. Observing literally means you’re stepping back and simply observing instead of being engaged and feeding. Understanding can help. It’s like a good foundation. Some problems literally survive out of UNawareness of them. Also exposing yourself to your fears, challenging yourself , with things you find difficult, gradually, so you’re not too overwhelmed and it backlashes instead. Also medication can help in some cases if you don’t already take them. In my case they didn’t help me, but I still believe in giving it a shot.

Yea

That’s a lot of time

I see your point. I am the type that tends to experiment when I have problems, I did it with my skin and stomach. But it depends on the problem and what my conclusion about it is based on my understanding of it. I want to try psychedelics some time, I might discontinue medication as they’re not helping me.

My description of my experience is based on direct internal awareness.

I’m not here to prove myself to anyone. So I don’t mind you writing like that. But you are wrong

It will never happen. It can either stay the same or get worse. i don’t have a normal brain. That is coming from my own interoceptive awareness. There has not been one second of me having a normal experience since like beginning of high school (that’s approximately when I started to notice my self dissolving)

I need to start masturbating so I can be this smart. That’s what I got from your reply

Good I hope it works out for you. Update us if you want it would be cool

Damn that’s rough. Im also going through stuff, but very different Do you think they are genetic?

When I bought the bark I had no trouble receiving it. Maybe find a tutorial with simpler ingredients? You want me to send the one I used?

You don’t have to answer but what illness is it?

Haha thanks I extracted dmt that worked in giving me an effect from Mimosa hostilis root bark. It was simple ingredients to find

Lol when I saw your notification I thought you’d say something against what I said. I have only tried a little dmt and 5 Meo dmt in small doses. I don’t remember the dmt but the 5 Meo dmt almost completely erased the border between me and the world, it’s almost like melting into the enviroment, not completely though, because I took a small dose. I guess on larger dose it would be full blown “no self. “. If that would feel “connected” I don’t know. But to me the small dose felt like I almost dissolved, so not more connected I wanna try different psychedelics but I live at my parents house so I gotta be sneaky and its hard to get a hold of

He tends to write in uncommon, complicated way with uncommon terms. Your English seems pretty good, English is also not my first but I’m still fluent in it. I agree. When I write I always try to write in a simple way that people can understand. And to make it shorter and more digestible is preferable too

Hahaahahah I swear. Do people read such long posts ever. (No offense, I’m impressed by such writing)

I haven’t read yet but damn did you write all that from your mind ?

I’m feeling kinda good right now ❤️I’m still kinda disconnected from myself (it’s normal for me) but it’s not super severe. Thanks for all the responses . ❤️I didn’t ask for help but it’s still nice of people to give their input. And I know many people enjoy writing in forums so it’s also for your own sake

It’s a bit weird. Because in my case, it can happen very occasionally that I get sexual dreams, and even more rarely, I can orgasm from them, without masturbating. But as soon as I fully wake up, the horniness goes away. And I never get horny in waking life since about a year back. I’ve tried maybe once or twice to masturbate exactly after waking up from a sexual dream, but it didn’t really work, the horniness just went away. I don’t feel sexual desire in waking life, but I wish to have it back, like I did in the past. I don’t have sexual repression.

Good point. I am naturally very inwards. I have done a lot of a kind of “self inquiry”, (observing of mind and self). It has mostly been in a self conscious manner, but I don’t see how else it would be done, self conscious can mean two things,” insecure “or just aware of yourself in general (which is a more neutral way), people use the term in different ways. I have done both of them. I have been neurotic. But I’d say it has been my awareness of it that has eventually with time cured it. What I experience now is a kind of “lack”. It’s not really “suffering” because as I said I lack emotion, and that includes negative emotions, but it is “unsatisfactory”. I feel this disconnect is a kind of “state”. My thoughts can affect my state a bit, or rather just help me to get through it without being so negative about it, but only to a certain extent. They’re not all powerful.

I don’t have emotions