Sugarcoat

One of my impressions of people here is that many score high on the openness personality trait. Also conscientiousness. ADHD to me sounds like someone impulsive, more focused on the immediate moment than long term, and who would have trouble focusing for long. Like doing meditation or watching long Leo videos. They might be more pragmatic. Although I’ve heard adhd people can be deep thinkers , so it’s non impossible to draw correlation there. It also seems some people are more self centered, so they’re interested in developing a nice self image, which could be linked to the tendency of personal development. There’s also like a streak of autism about it, to go about life in this calculated way forming a conceptual framework, instead of being more “natural” like some people are, especially in regards to socializing can the pickup approach come off as little autistic, where you make mental models of socialization instead of just naturally socializing. From an outside perspective self development can be seen as little geeky and try hard, like you’re full of yourself. So it might be more likely practiced by people who are less focused on relationships than ideas.

By direct consciousness you might imply that it transcends limitation, which contrasts to our current consciousness which is aware of limitation Effortlessness kinda implies an ease, so yea suffering feels more like a struggle so it can’t really be effortless by definition. I agree we deeply engage our mind. We engage in suffering, some feel suffering is necessary too, like being stressed feels it can help you have things under control. The human happiness id say is known in the same way the human suffering is known. But a transcendent happiness is unknown for most It can help to recognize when something is a concept, so if it weighs us down (like a negative belief) we have possibility of letting it go , instead of confusing it with rest of reality

It’s recognized for what it is

Scientists try to figure out reality, and they don’t want spiritual people to do it because it would loose them their job 😅 Jk

Yea maybe it allows us to access reality directly so no concept can feel like it grasps it

Late reply but yes I agree for most willpower alone won’t work because it’s like a limited resource, a muscle that gets tired. You need to also know yourself well and your triggers, to identify tricks to cope etc

I like a little vaping from time to time😏 How do cigs make you feel? I only vape for the effect. Although the act of blowing smoke is also kinda satisfying

I mean I recognize my thoughts as just concepts to, but then what the nature of a thought is , is not a concept 🤔

But do you live from that place?

Being conscious and aware is duality to me. It’s this human experience I agree we don’t need to consider enlightenment a pursuit separate from everyday life. It’s accessible always but I think as I wrote to princess Arabia that it’s reasonable to assume it most likely requires intense focus, that may be difficult when you’re genuinely focused on worldly things We think of happiness usually in the realm of human psychology. But yea we can be clueless about different mental states that could give access to a different quality of happpiness , and not know that it’s possible Suffering can be pretty effortless too. I’d say it’s quite natural for human psychology I think it’s important to recognize that your mind is just that, your mind, and anything it comes up with is just a concept. So not taking any concept so seriously, which connects to your point about setting everything aside and investigating from scratch

Saying it’s “just a story and not so serious” is a denial of your humanity. If you were sent to gas chamber you would feel it’s very serious

I think it’s realistic to believe that for most seeing the unreality of the self is very difficult

I guess it’s also quite individual for the person, what causes them happiness

I’m sorry to hear that Some thoughts I have. You said you feel like you’re holding things in. One thing that could potentially help is to speak honestly and directly with the people in your life where the relationship feels unfair. And letting yourself cry while you do it if that arises. Talking freely with honesty but still respectfully could feel like you’re “getting it out of your system”. And it has the potential to affect the other person to change their behavior. I have personally cut people of in my life before in respectful manner and it feels good to speak truth, living a lie can be mentally draining When it comes to your health and physical appearance, if doctors haven’t been able to help you, taking it in your own hands by doing your own private research can feel empowering, like you’re taking control to the extent you feel possible. Connecting with people with similar issues, in for example sub forums of people with similar health problems, could also help. You can feel for yourself, would focusing on bettering these things just increase obsession and neurosis, or would it help it? Sometimes in life we need to focus more on acceptance, other times on trying to change, or both at the same time is possible. When it comes to study, really ask yourself if it’s worth it. If you don’t like it because it’s too hard, there could be flaws in your study techniques making it so you are falling behind. But if you truly feel it’s not for you, try to make a change there if possible, by taking another road in your education/career. You could talk it through with someone, or write privately in your journal all your un filtered thought, give them some structure and come clear to yourself what steps you wanna take next in life. In terms of social anxiety, sometimes it’s too much at once if you try to tackle that too, but it could also be possible that it’s very giving to try to overcome it. A crucial step in overcoming social anxiety is precisely putting yourself in uncomfortable social situations, but one’s that don’t feel way too overwhelming , as that could just strengthen the fear. Something that’s more directly targeting the stress overall could be installing some kind of relaxing practice. Could be mediation, could be exercise, grounding etc I can relate to feeling old haha. I’m 22 sometimes I wish I could stay this age forever

I didn’t know I was an emotion, I thought it was me that notices Maybe that’s why people say “I am happy” 😂

Something that is free is to change your mindset into a better one which can make you happier, and this can be seen as an attitude change partly

You can be devoid of emotion

But for humans happiness tends to arise as response to circumstances in many cases , so you can pursue those circumstances. Many haven’t mastered themselves to the degree to be able to be happy regardless of circumstances

I see those as distinct. Absence of happiness is neutrality not suffering

Even if it’s fleeting it can be worth to pursue

We find it sometimes, sometimes not, sometimes they come, sometimes not.. it’s both

That relief can be felt as happiness! I’ve felt that

Those tend to be emotions people want to avoid, so they don’t seek it out. But technically you could if you seek out situations that trigger it for you, if you know your triggers (we could say it’s still internally generated tho, but we respond to enviroment). It’s a response to a certain triggering situation, like happiness is a response to a different situation. Although its possible to feel happiness for “no reason at all” just existing

Well there is happiness to be found through different approaches. People do it all the time it’s just that it isn’t endless, or permanent, and a lot of the time not very long term either. And the self can be present during happiness (sense of self) in particular when it’s happiness related to the self image, like someone feeling good because they made themselves look attractive

Thanks