Jannes

Do you have experience with remote viewing?

Sure I can give it a try, not sure what the right method would be though.. Do you know how remote viewing works? If I just use my fantasy about where you are, I will definitely be incorrect. The most vanilla way would be if you made a photo of your location, gave it a code and I remote viewed that place through the code. Thats like cooking noodles with tomato sauce in an infinite kitchen of possibilites but its the only way I am sure about.

I feel very little desire for sex somehow. I rejected so much sex that it definitely created new pathways in my brain, so that its harder for me to just go for impulse. Well but I still have a bit of horniness, maybe its the whole emotional weight that I cant bear.

I am still really confused and messed up. I thought the walk on the beach yesterday got it fixed but nah. I am feeling anger now that I didnt get a public goodbye.

Well even remote viewers say they dont know how it works, it just works. I also think remote viewing makes more sense from an idealistic then a physical paradigm. I just dont want to work and you can get paid well for remote viewing contracts. And remote viewing has the side effect that it seriously questions the physical paradigm, so it also benefits mankind in that way. Other then that, yeah there are probably more exciting things. edit: Well also maybe not, because to do remote viewing, you have to be very intuitive and conscious, so its meditative in a way.

So if I remote view what you do and you masturbate, what you are saying is that this is not always what you do and actually the fault of my own dirty mind? ... Jokes aside of course you have to approach the results of remote viewing intelligently.

Maybe. Well a formal training costs about 1k so I want to be careful. I am quite sensitive and very intuitive. I am not sure if I ever had experiences with it. The last couple of years I experienced a lot of emotional turbulance which makes it harder though.

Kind of maybe. I see your point. That can all work in different ways though. I am viewing a target yes, but I dont think that "me viewing an objective target out there" is the only possible interpretation of whats happening. You mean if I hold the paradigm of an objective world to make remote viewing work I deepen the illusion when I practice remote viewing? That would be my interpretation of what you mean, please elaborate. No it wont make me happier, but you can make money doing it.

Some teachers say that, others say that everyone can learn it, its just that some are much more gifted in it then others. Quite a parallel to what spiritual teachers say about reaching enlightenment haha.

I hadnt mentioned it, but at the moment when the leader of the club didnt bid a public farewell to me at the moment it was typical she gave me an eye and pulled back when I looked at her. I had difficult moments with her, but she does have a sense for fairness. People are multi faceted, in some facets I hold her in high regards. Anyways the scenario in my head is that she mentioned that at the weekly head meeting of the theatre club and to shut her down the leader of the club revealed critics I had about her but wanted to keep personal secret. Thats the one scenario where I would want to contact her. But its likely just a fantasy my ego mind spun up.

I saw one of the girls of my old theatre club today. I had quite a lot of contact with her and backstory. She looked so fucking weird -- really tense. She was really sweaty coming from the beach probably and just passed by me without looking at me. She must have noticed me.. This created a firework of possible explanations and I have quite a few far reaching ones collected today all being connected to myself.

The vibe reminds me a bit of this.

I still waste no thought about my career other then remote viewing. Well, its also semester break and socializing is at the forefront which plays into it as well. But still.. I really need this variable figured out, either I built my whole life around remote viewing as a career or I drop it, if it doesnt work.

Notes: I am internally so confused, it's really hard for me to get back to my core. I am literally on my own at the beach walking over stones (direct input) and I am still significantly disconnected from myself. I built up all these stories about my old theatre club which collided with reality. I definitely over-demonized my old theatre club. But certain things are just a given there like pretending above being grounded. And a lot of shit happened, although shit happens everywhere. There were multiple situations which could have gave me access to the club though. I was thinking the whole time how to get into a strong position again, really telling the leader of the club my position again but I am now feeling like letting it go. I can just leave now in peace. ... I feel like I am getting a bit more in touch with me now. Walking at a stony beach with music really is a brute force way to get in touch with oneself haha. Even went swimming naked. I feel so sexy swimming naked. I want to make a picture with me in a red tanga in the beach looking at the skies at night. That would be a piece of art, presenting a certain feeling of life. ... There are these humanoids-robots which can cook now. Just thought about how they could serve street food which is kind of scray. What if you put them in a moveable kitchen and place that somewhere to serve fresh food kind of like automats.. I kind of have this tendency to attract annoying people. There are quite a lot of social people who are just super annoying so nobody wants to spent to much time with them so they always look for new people they spent some time with for a while until they are wanted there anymore. Or it seems that way because all people annoy me to a certain extend. I often end up with these people because I dont judge and dont take a strong social position. I am looking for something very specific I think. Until then my social spot is great because I socialize but I am not bound to anyone which gives me the best chance to come accross the right kind of person. ... Many problems also stem from the fact that some people in the old theatre club sometimes did try to get a little closer but because I can't experience closeness I didn't take these chances. However this doesnt justify the shit I took, I would have had a much better fighting chance though, well pretty much a guarentee at winning or avoidance of conflict all together probably.

My old theatre club was so much more then just a place to be, it was a whole strategy set for life, socializing etc. I notice how my behaviour seems to adapt a bit as well, like I am so much less grounded, much more pretentious.

What I am most annoyed about was that I still payed for entry afterwards and acted like nothing happened, as if I didnt just get kicked from the club without a public goodbye. I am able to confront, but not when I feel like I am in such a weak position.

I have to remember though that I dont need the old theatre club anymore for socializing. The group of my social group fits more into my age, is more mature, has more options for girls ... its really just the acting part.

Went to the gym and managed to feel so much heat which was inside me. Its such a tricky situation, I won some things and also lost some things with going back to the theatre club for a visit, no wonder I was hesitant. ... I am looking at careers from people who went to the theatre club now. Quite a few are working as actors now. If this would be a great path for me idk, productions were certainly fun, but I might have ended constantly bullshitting and confused. Its likely to late for me now. I am a bit jealous even though I dont even know if the path is desirable.

Today was such a typical adhd day like before I figured out techniques.. I wanted to get some things done but then was distracted with philosophizing over fashion and thinking about my old club. I wanted to do things but started doing 3 things at the same time, finishing none. Now I feel like going to the gym for movement and the feeling of doing anything. No worries, there was a lot to process today. And next time I do body doubling.

I am gnawing with the thought that I could have had all the benefits of the club and could have become an actor if I just played along one time. I put everything in and basically got nothing out of it. Well my soul is intact..

And some outfits are just out of this world .. https://de.pinterest.com/pin/1094234040707565500/

So as a minimalist its impossible to have great style. Minimalism is antithetical to great style, because it takes away diversity. Yet, the more diversity you have the harder it will be to strike a balance.

The key to great style is balancing diversity! Every outfit which is too one sided looks boring. Think about your whole suit or your jogger with baggy sweater, ... There are clothes which in itself are already kind of balanced. Like a black Jeans, or a swaeter with a collar .. you can archieve balance that way but the diversity in this outfit is pretty low. If you can combine your colorful grandmas sweater with a leather jacket, that is a prime example of great style. The more different tastes you can sucessfully balance, the greater the style. Differents taste include colors, vibes, materials, .. Another facet is that of course it also matters where your wear your outfit. At a night late social club some outfits fit better then on a professional set. And it also matters how you look like, what your skin color and your eye color is. And it also matters who you are as a person. These are already given things which need to be balanced around.

!!! yeah that got me thinking as well. He did get some things wrong though, at least the point about that the CDU isnt a democrazy for leading germany with only 28% of votes. The system works differently in Germany, smaller parties come together to built a coalition which reaches 50%. If anything, the far right party is deliberately kicked out from other politicians.