Ilan

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Everything posted by Ilan

  1. @Windappreciator to me you’re the closest one to the truth. If people really deeply interested themselves in how antipsychotic came in into the world. They would realize the enormous devilry behind this.
  2. Yeah I know they are attracted to leadership but I also think it is hard for you ladies to admit to yourselves how much pure « status » matters but if you introspected deeply and honestly, maybe you’d realize it.. (I might be wrong)
  3. Fuck. Once again, Leo is right and he just made me realize the source of my main neurosis, why I was so happy obsessed with status knowing deep down it is bullshits my whole life
  4. I’m resisting it so much. The more conscious the women is, the more feminine she we’ll be and it means, the more conscious she is, the more she’s be attracted to status ? Am I right, or do I lack logic somewhere ?
  5. Best advice. Don’t fall into the trap of wanting to rush it by doing 10000 things at the time when you have an impulse.
  6. It seems to me that animals even though they are driven by survival have more tolerance for suffering(maybe I’m deluded) what are you thought on this ? and also, sometimes I encounter insects on the street almost death but still convulsing. And I’m always confuse of if I should crush it to stop its pain or not. I’m always thinking in my head like «imagine he’s feeling the same pain as a human drawning or something like that » so I would instinctively crush it but when I want to, there is always a thought in the back of my mind that say « who are you to know it is the right thing to do? » « who are you to take his last moments of life away? » So I would appreciate your thoughts on this one too
  7. Blending narcissist/sociopath with psychedelics can lead to dangerous territory
  8. @Yahya If you are really passionate about health. I would suggest you find a creative way of understanding health and make a living out of it.
  9. He made plenty a video for orange: 2013-2015 Leo’s videos are great for orange
  10. Sorry I read « why » .. I stopped them 10month ago, they also forced me to take lithium after I stoped that too. And now when the pain is too powerful take some benzo. The « funny » thing is that I never needed any benzo before psych ward.. sorry if there’s some hatred in my post.
  11. For the same reason you would stop drinking a glass of mercury every day
  12. @taotemu @Endangered-EGO thanks for your good intentions but I think you do not get my situation. I’m not having a down like I used to have always before my psych ward and always knew that I would overcome it. Even when it was very dark. Since this poisoning(let’s call a cat a cat) life energy stopped completely to circulate in myself. I used to go to the gym and run at 17kilometers per hour during 30minutes. (And this even when I was feeling down, maybe when I was feeling down I did 15kilometers per hour) but now I can’t function. I can’t even go for a run 8km/hour. When I say I need a miracle. I mean it. When I tell you I want to vomit all day I mean it. Chemical poison entered my body during 1month and a half at very high dosages. And I get it, some people just get out of it fine. I can even imagine that it does good to some people(even though I highly doubt it, maybe they feel better but the energy in them certainly reduce. It maybe diminishes their pain by making them dysfunctional) but to me. I don’t know if my body is made differently but this ruined completely my body/mind.
  13. Lol don’t worry I know this, My soul has been raped by the stage Orange devil.
  14. Holly fuck, it has been 10month I’ve been thinking the whole painting of my life has been completely shattered by this psych ward. And you are making me believe that maybe I can make an even more beautiful painting out of it. You make me believe. You are making faith entering my soul @Tought Art. Take care
  15. Your ego is all that made you suffer throughout your all life. It is what traumatized you when you were a kid. It is what made you cry and suffer because of an asshole that cheated on you while your charming prince was next to you loving you. It’s what made you waste 5years in college when you could feel it was not the right path to embody your true creativity. It is what makes you waste energy arguing with people. It is what tells you it is too late to be happy. It is people/family pleasing. It is doing what your parents expect of you rather than what your heart tells you to do. It is then what makes you blame your parents for influencing you the wrong way rather than taking responsibility for it. It is what is making you angry, frustrated, bitter. It is what is making you so rigid that you break like glass every time you hit an obstacle. Ego is what attracted every toxic people you ever encounter in your life. It’s not only suffering. It is seeking suffering. Ego is what telling you of not wasting time letting go of the ego as you have so much stuff to do. Ego is what prevent you from crying, laughing, being joyful.
  16. Lol it is just a reference. He clearly is talking about dangerous hardcore spiritual work.