Federico del pueblo

Cognitive dissonance... I think you should rewatch a few hundred hours of Leo's videos, especially about biases, self-deception etc. Btw, what are you even doing here in the dating section? Just help out the young girls?

@Loba it's still worse than I thought. Sad. This is what incels would say about women. For the same reasons you say it about men. No. You don't seem like a person I should trust. Yes people are typically not interested in becoming more aware of their biases. It's called confirmation bias. You might figure out things you don't like and they might have something to do with you, not just men. I'm starting to get a sense that you are at least as pitiful as the men you must have dated. This is just such a negative view. Sorry you haven't been able to meet better men. Which is exactly what bitter men, like incels, would say about women.

I think if you are at that level you're probably also able to just love men for what they are without any bitterness, right? Anyway you still hold certain beliefs about men that are extremely exaggerated and not as true as you think they are like That's just untrue. For some men it's true ofc, for many it's not. But if this has been your subjective experience (which also can be distorted by the beliefs you already had before the experiences) then it can have a lot to do with you. I definitely know women who don't share your views, sure they also know that men want sex, and some men only want sex, but they are able to find other men who value them as a person and are in happy relationships with them. But anyway as you're not trying to attract men anymore because you are completely fulfilled it probably doesn't matter to you. By the way. If you want to contemplate how biased you are in terms of men you could ask yourself some questions and see which answers arise. Like e.g. "is there anything I am grateful for in men?" "What are some of the best qualities men typically have? (not the negative stuff, but actually positive qualities)" See what comes up.

Yes, I have managed to not become boring in spite of my very high age... @Etherial Cat Te lo perdono!

He was an asshole. He had some level of desperation and needed to use tricks. There will be younger guys just like him. And they will think of other possibilities to trick a woman if they can't use the experience advantage.

Did you know that some girls will start to voluntarily call a guy "daddy" during sex and get turned on by it? Haha This is not how you compliment a gentleman! ?

Now you're just digging yourself deeper in some kind of psychological pit. It's not like life is easy for men. It's also not like there are no loving men and no men who would value you for your personality. There are very good men, but sure they still want sex. Men are just biological creatures after all (like you). With that kind of negative and toxic outlook you simply won't be able to attract the really good men.

And when it comes to this experience I totally understand your bitterness and any consequential concerns about "older guys". I mean this could have been said by a younger guy too. This way or another it's just fucked up and immoral behaviour, trying to trick someone to do something that has a risk coming with it. This is why I would advise you to always think for yourself. Of course you need to screen men (and actually people) regarding potential threads coming from them. And I need to do the same. I'm just at the other end of the spectrum, kind of paranoid about women in their early thirties trying to get impregnated by me so I will then pay some compensation for them (sorry, I'm too lazy to look up the correct term). "No it's okay, I take the pill...we don't need the condom ??...just stick it in" Me: ??? No, my feeling tells me that we totally Do need the condom!

I'm flattered now. I seem to give off really young and energetic vibes with my posts haha No, I'm not thaaat old. I'm younger than Leo, but no by many years. So it actually can easily happen that a girl is ten years younger or so. But it's not like I focus on them intentionally, I just don't discriminate them either. And that "daddy" thing I mentioned above would be said at a point when it's already obvious that there is some attraction, not like some some old, sleazy, grey guy who says this to a girl 25 years younger than him to "show interest" haha

@Etherial Cat Yeah I can see that. I'll often say to these young girls "if we get along you can call me daddy ;)" This always makes for a good laugh haha

Maybe. The thing is I could think of a lot of reasons for which I might be better for a much younger girl than a lot of guys of the same age. And these reasons are just about as valid as your concerns. - I have more life experiences to share - I have more profound views on things, and am not as naive and clueless as the young guys - I'm better in bed and know what I'm doing - I could help her better with certain struggles, could offer better emotional support - I can create the more emotional and meaningful experience - I can turn her on better, charm her more So what should now stop me from believing that I'm a good choice for a younger girl. That I have a small wrinkle on my forehead?

I've read it now. It's purely subjective though. Sure you can see it like this. But a guy can have a different view of it and is just as right or wrong about it as you are. All these things can be the precise reasons for which a woman might find a much older man attractive (except for the exploiting stuff). You are responsible for yourself and what you do with your body. Nobody can make you do something against your will unless you let them do so (rape excluded ofc). Of course there is an imbalance in the dynamic. But unless a guy has gained lots of experiences with women there also is an imbalance in the dynamic, just in favor of the girl (attractive girls have more power in social situations with guys of the same age due to higher social value/sexual market value in most cases). This is why men get into learning success with women, so they shift the power dynamic more to their advantage.

@Gianna But I feel like I still have to put certain things into perspective to not leave you with worst image of men you could possibly have ? So let me add a few more points. Yeah I get this. The interesting thing is this. For most guys getting sex is hard. The harder something is to attain, the more desperate a person is gonna become about attaining it. This is neediness. So the focus is gonna shift more towards this thing and somewhat away from other things. Ironically this means if all girls were super sexual and promiscuous and were even chasing guys for sex it would change the entire dynamic. Now sex would become less interesting and validating for guys and thus boring. And because of this guys would actually become more concerned about getting into relationships and really getting to know girls etc. But of course this is a hypothetical scenario, it's never gonna happen. But what this also means is this: the guys who are the best at attaining sex could be split up in two groups: the first group will just capitalise on it forever and fuck as much as they can until they get depressed. The second group will grow beyond just fucking around and start to care more about deep relationships and connection etc. And if you want to understand this dynamic better then just observe yourself. For you it's generally easy to get sex. So it's less validating. You have a harder time finding a great guy who is super attractive and willing to commit to you. So now maybe you'll start to behave in more desperate ways about getting him to commit. This is where you might become needy, it's just the flip side of the coin. The guys who are very nice and ass kissing and who will bend over backwards for you would actually like to be in a relationship with you. And they would do whatever you asked for to make you happy. BUT, they are coming from a place of weakness. Their nice behaviour is a compensation for feeling like they are beneath you. For them you are a total catch. They give so you give back. They are nice so you stay (and sometimes they get a little nasty because they're so insecure and jealous). They try to make you feel good, so you give them sex. They will send you several inches long texts to explain how much they like you So the guys who would be the most willing to do anything it takes to make you happy are the ones who are the least sexually interesting. Sorry ?

Then it kinda does work. Of course the guy will lie. He thinks this could get him the outcome he's looking for... it's just survival after all. So if he contradicts himself then your counter game basically has succeeded. Understand that a experienced guy (with "game") is generally good at making a girl want to have sex. Not every girl but many. So this whole scenario might often not even occur, the way you describe it.

You could simply it even further. Almost all guys want sex with you as soon as possible (if you are the girl in the profile pic). They will deny it and do anything it takes. It doesn't matter what they tell you, they want sex. So any guy you ever talk to, if the two of you were suddenly in a room together and you just started to behave in a seductive way, he would immediately fuck you right then and there. Sure there are exceptions (guys in relationships, traumatized guys, sexually very insecure guys etc.), but this is the rule of thumb for you. But... because most guys are not good at attaining sex (early), it doesn't quite work like this. And many guys are so bad at attracting/seducing women that the only option to attain sex they can think of is going in a long term relationship. Yes there are of course other reasons for a LTR too, so different intentions just kinda get mixed together.

Yes.

If we're talking about women in night clubs and guys hitting on them, then there is no extra thing required to orient the guy's mind to sex. She could as well be 35 and kinda serious and grounded, if she's attractive it's about sex anyway. This is not to say that it's only about sex. Anything could arise from it. But a guy typically wouldn't see himself getting to know a girl in a nightclub to then have 5 dinner dates with her before the first sex And you ladies know that you can give a guy the "you're just looking for sex, right?" line. This will throw off all the inexperienced/insecure guys and the "players" don't care about it.

It's fairly simple. Young girls look attractive. And there are more young girls going out and they are often a bit crazier and more fun. The young guys haven't honed their skills nor overcome their fears and don't want to embarrass themselves. They might also believe that they're inadequate for these girls in some way, they might even believe they are too young ? Get rid of that bitchy attitude lol. You don't owe any guy anything, but feeling "kinda insulted"?! That's weird. Also consider that many many young girls don't have any problems with older guys flirting with them (if they are good ofc). Just feel kinda flattered instead and if needed excuse yourself. The last girl that was about 10 years younger than me said "god, why are you old guys always so fucking hot??! This is so annoying." My response: Because we're so old ?

Cool. What kind of style do you recommend? Or is it anything that looks well put together?

@K Ghoul I don't wanna go even more off topic in this thread (we already made it derail at this point). You can open a thread about love, bd presents and female psychology if you want to and I'll reply there.

Don't try to play your "I know what love is, but you don't" kind of games with me. If you think that birthday presents are an important part of love, then you seem to be still rather far away from knowing love. And what do you not understand about the other things I wrote like doing things together or going on some trip etc. (which all costs money)? Haha, funny, this girl thinking that the parfume as a bd present is what proofs the love ? I never said that money is not important for supporting a family. You just introduce a new element and then talk like I already said anything about it lol. But even when you want a family, you don't need a guy who makes 200k.

Exactly. And if she isn't full of Hollywood social conditioning she won't have any problems with that. She might simply buy it on any day, doesn't have to be her birthday.

No. Read Leo's answer to your question, that already explains it pretty much. Here's how I see it. If money is being spent, then it's spent with a girl and not on a girl. If a girl sort of demanded that I buy her certain things as birthday presents, then I'd know that she's not mature enough yet. It's a kind of childish thing to do. Love is not about things. It's about shared experiences and values. It's about intentions and how you actually treat each other, behave around each other. This idea of birthday presents (things) is some Hollywood programming, something that people have in their heads from watching shows, movies and series. It has nothing to with actual love, because this is something you can't buy and if you have to buy each other things to proof your love, then something is wrong. I might buy a girl a dildo or some other toy, but that's because we're gonna have a shared experience with that thing, not because I must buy her happiness. Or I might buy an experience like some trip somewhere (for the same reason).

Your dick is gonna shrink. About 0.1 inches per prostitute you hook up with.

You forgot to add the option "end the relationship".