Rishabh R

At work a woman came towards me , put her arm around me then asked for my number and asked weather I am single. After we exchanged numbers I asked to come to a restaurant with me and she said yes.

@Thought Art Thank you . Hope he listens .

@Leo Gura A healthy post on this forum. What I have observed from following your work since 2017 that transitioned from basic self -help to advanced spirituality , that's growth in a nutshell. But I also observed over the years that you learn heavily towards - Negativity bias - a well documented concept in psychology . Also when I first interacted with you after joining the forum I was surprised that how such a mature self-help teacher who changed my life was very harsh with me and his audience . It created a split image of you in my mind. I know it sounds ridiculous but it's worthwhile for you to watch your own video again - Counterintuitive nature of life. Yup people are selfish but doesn't it lead to selflessness since you know selfish people run companies,create technologies but it leads to betterment of mankind as whole. I mean just look around - Coul you possibly imagine we would be interacting on this forum if internet wasn't created due to whatever selfish reason. I have experience of applying self-help since 9 years and my journey began with Actualized.org. I also learn heavily towards negativity bias and overlooked the counterintuitive nature of life but as I applied it my life deeply improved.

I took many romantic rejections personally , including the harsh one as a result I suffered for years and years.

So are these values listed here are better than chasing women ,money ,fame or even worse? Bro I have experienced them to better than chasing success,sex or women and fame . It has been proven counterintuitive to me after years. So yeah suffering changed me for the better- experienced this and I am saying it proudly .

@Leo Gura Then why I experience happiness when I measure myself based on my values of Resilience by accepting and engaging with challenges head on, when I question my assumptions why do I feel tranquil, when I express myself honestly then why it feels better than performance? Even though I have moments of suffering but when I sit with suffering practicing acceptance it dissolves . Anyways thanks for the feedback.Self-correction is necessary for truth since it's an attitudinal thing. As per control I disagree with you since if not in 100% but most cases it's in our control how we respond to the external world. Are the values listed above part of truth or are they divorced from truth ? So are you suggesting that Stoics were liars ? Also as per most people I have observed that more honest I am in my social life , more fulfillment I experience regardless of other people's reactions .

@Iblitan Whenever you feel depressed during tragedy or adversity , tell yourself - Challenges are the path to becoming stronger. Process the emotion and take action. If it's outside your control realize this - No amount of crying or weeping can improve it so I must endure it and continue taking action. I don't know what you might be going through . Just sharing my advice.

@Leo Gura Question on values . Is acting in alignment with your values which are 100% within your control an alignment with truth ? Is it wisdom? (I think it is but correct me if I'm wrong)Posting my tracker here.These are my results .

@Emotionalmosquito Hurray . Love to see your progress .Bro.

@Ulax Sorry dude I considered it seriously by the way love you man.

@Ulax I don't think that manipulation will lead her too far other than sex. But if he's looking for sex then great.

@Olaf Oh really . It matters but until you like that girl, not for the sake of manipulating her into your bed.

@Olaf Great . But bro from your previous posts I saw that outcome detachment is huge. Like recenty I approached a woman just asking for some work related stuff. Before I approached her she smiled. After the approach ,I mean after sometime she came to talk to me . I talked to her and enjoyed it. Truly Backwards law is huge .

For sometime like minutes . Then I take action in the moment despite feeling anxious . Even though I am not a sort of perfectionist/badass at it.

Oh really , then why don't you interview him regarding weather his story was true or not .Or do your own reasearch. Also I am not talking about Victor Frankl at all . You assumed it incorrectly. I was talking about simple thing - Counterintuitive nature of life or Backwards law by Alan Watts. Search acceptance and commitment therapy on Google ,apply it that's it . No need to read complicated self-help books . Just apply basic principles. Don't chase success,chase massive action and effort . Here's the truth : You will never feel successful enough consistently no matter what you achieve . Better act wisely .

@Ulax Nope I feel through it . I try to stop resistance to the anxiety and try to feel it on purpose when I am anxious .

@Never_give_up Yup acceptance is the key to reduce suffering . I noticed in my experience that whoever I accepted and took action anyway such as in my career, approaching women that it's a superpower . Giving you an example from an interview which I had - everyone was nervous before the interview including me , I accepted my anxiety which cause me to smile . Then I have the interview anyway - it went good .

@Monster Energy What's the update . Are you there ?

@Leo Gura A suggestion from my side . You can take it or let the suggestion fuck off 😁. We already love you . You are loved by a lot of people . Actualized.org is one of the most beautiful things built on earth . It isn't an institution but rather a representation of transformation from basic self-help to advanced philosophy and beyond . Heck, I have observed many people don't do self-help properly leave philosophy and spirituality apart. But you did them not only that you reached us to how to do them properly . So whenever you feel am urge to reply on this forum anywhere in an arrogant way, keep the device aside ,accept the feeling for 3-4 minutes and then reply . Just my 2 cents.

@Ramanujan But bro success is counterintuitive. Getting it won't feel like success . I have experienced this - After making to work I didn't felt like I had a grand success . For sure few days felt good but they faded quickly than I expected . So yeah ,I don't know what you're conditions are but if you're willing to struggle then it will determine the magnitude of your triumph . The further you chase things like Success , happiness the further they move away from you . Realized this after I was miserable in my class 12th and further but when I learned about the counterintuitive nature of life from Leo's video and when I began applying it I made progress , not only that the more I accepted my suffering happier I became , it was true back then and it's true now . The more I just focussed on taking action more I progressed and succeeded . Life is counterintuitive dude . Understand it , watch Leo's video on it and then try to apply it over and over again.

@Ramanujan Bro what are you talking about . Many things have been discovered - before self-help there was philosophy which has since time immemorial .

Words of wisdom.

But I think that not only spiritual people but philosophers , even scientists need skepticism in order to you know doing better science ,better philosophy , also I didn't know this one - even better self-help. Questioning not only changed my life by giving me better jobs but also it helped me look at reality carefully like in case I can admit that when I was in college and was getting rejected by girls - I didn't looked at the fact that other girls were attracted to me but also I was exclusively focussing on rejections ,posting my suffering from rejections on this forum whereas you know as attraction is counterintuitive - The girl who was crush of whole batch approached me ( I didn't had a crush on her ). Multiple women have me signals due to my vulnerability and authenticity . Do you think that even though you shot - How to get laid series but your episodes - Assumption is the mother of all Fuckups and the counterintuitive nature of life are far more valuable for guys trying to get laid or trying find a girlfriend?

@Leo Gura Leo your recent blog post is great . Particularly I liked the part of skepticism , questioning assumptions , direct experience is the closest thing to truth, also the philosophy of self-doubt . I discovered Actualized.org when I was 17 , now I am 26 and you know what people hate philosophy in real life . I am talking about people in real life . I talked about a person of my own age, that person asked that who is your idol and I told Socrates . It was mind blowing or per say surprising to me that they didn't knew Socrates . Hello that person couldn't even pronounce Socrates . That's how deluded people are in their own culture and religion . I am also deluded but not only that the main point is that I am wrong . You may not reply to my post but here is the thing - I have discovered that challenging your own mental assumptions is one of the worthwhile journeys that one's mind can take rather than seeling the comfort of living in a positive or negative beleifs . Life has proven to me again and again - I don't know is truer than any positive or negative certainity of an event happening in the future . Questions - Am I going in the right direction when I choose questioning my thoughts ,assumptions instead of choosing to be confident in self-belief ? Is self-belief is better or self-questioning better ? ( I assume self-questioning is better ) Is direct experience questionable ? ( Since direct experience exists until we are experiencing things or is it a dream ?) Thank you much appreciation from a long time subscriber to your videos since 2017.

It's awesome to me due to it's action orientation and it challenges you in a healthy way. For me personally it was good since I never trusted the evidence reality gave me be it in career , dating etc. I viewed it through the negative lens. When I used to post on this forum's dating section - I would only post that how girl at college rejected me ( back then I was studying engineering at college ) . I didn't posted that few girls were attracted to me . Such as a girl who was the crush of our whole batch approached me , a few another approached me . Also when I posted that I was threatened by other guys for talking to girls that too was an evidence of my attractiveness- I fell into classic negativity bias trap. As per action orientation I am already a massive action taker the problem was I didn't recognized myself as it and you know as Leo talks about it was not an issue of action it was an issue of self-belief .