something_else

This is pretty much what all people want in the end. But the problem is that it's so hard to tell whether you want this with any given person before you've spent a considerable amount of time with them and also a considerable amount of time with others so you know what you do/dont want. And even then, things change between people over time. That's why I personally prefer a more relaxed approach to relationships where you feel things out over time rather than going balls deep immediately, but of course each to their own I'm not saying it's impossible, but you should realise that this is not something that is easy to find and it will probably take you a lot of work. You're essentially looking for someone who is genuinely willing to commit to you for the rest of their life after only a few months right? Such guys are not the norm. It goes against our biological nature and you should def be aware of that if it's what you're looking for. Don't blame the guy for it either, we are not always so willing to commit to long term things easily because it comes at enormous cost to us Anyway, I don't wanna derail this thread anymore, I've said what I want to say

This all sounds like it's based in personal trauma, dating in the west is not anywhere near as extreme as this. There are plenty of trusting and loving relationships in Western cultures too Again, this happens in Indian marriages too to an extent, they just stay together because divorce is less acceptable, right? According to stats only 1% of marriages get divorced there, but 50-60% result in at least one partner cheating! That's fucking bonkers No matter what culture, it seems like 50-60% of marriages just straight up don't work out, even if they start with good intentions Again, it's not like committed, healthy, loving relationships are impossible in Western culture. We are just more hesitant about going balls deep into new relationships because it can be very costly I think the solution for you is still just going to be exposure to more girls. You have to talk to as many new girls as you possibly can until eventually you learn how to attract the girls of whatever culture you're in. If you talk to lots of girls it also makes you feel far more capable and far less inferior to others

India sounds like a nightmare for guys dating based on everything I’ve read about it And it sounds awful for girls too. Dating in general sounds hard there. I’ve heard horror stories from both sides Maybe nightmare is too strong a word but it sounds like there are many expectations placed on both men and women and many many pitfalls

That might actually be worse lol Is it normal in your culture to tell girls you barely know that you love them? Fine if it is, but it just seems super strange to me

I know it’s probably a culture thing… but why are you proposing to girls at 21. I can’t get my head around that

It’s meant to encourage you to be authentic, but in practice people give that advice when they really have no idea what advice to actually give you

I can give you lots of tinder profile advice if you want it but the truth is I spent 1.5 years getting mediocre results on Tinder optimising my profile, yet feeling constantly powerless. Then I started going out after covid and having way more fun and just generally feeling far more abundant with girls IMO the biggest difference between Tinder and the real world is how much control you have. In the real world you are in control of your exposure to girls, but online you are at the mercy of the Tinder algorithm. You are constantly waiting for new matches. But in person you can go and speak to girls whenever you feel like I still have a Tinder profile running (in fact the girl I’m seeing rn is from Tinder) but in order to not let tinder make you feel like total trash you need to be able get exposure to girls in the real world frequently to build up that abundance. Then you can have Tinder running in the background I went from like 1 match a week to 2-3 matches a day just by optimising my profile tho so it’s def possible to improve your results. Tips for optimisation: - Put all your pics on photofeeler.com - Post your profile in r/tinder under their profile review thread. You’ll prob only get a response or two but can often be very valuable

Dude move on or you’re going to get your heart fucked over hard here If she’s showing tons of interest in making it work long distance then maybe it would be possible but if she’s not showing signs like that then you are so going to regret fawning over her Ask yourself if you had 3 other girls equally as attractive but within walking distance if you’d still have this same obsession over her

Go somewhere where approaching is extremely socially acceptable like a club You can also start off by keeping chats elsewhere quite platonic until you get used to it

Remember that you have a very particular image of Leo in your head and it probably isn’t him going out and partying 99% of what you’ve seen of him is a floating head talking about super serious topics, now you’re seeing him in literally as far away a scenario as possible from that, but the original image in your mind of him is still there That makes you feel like he is out of place even though everyone else there just sees him as another dude having a good time since they don’t have those same preconceptions

Ok dude, whatever works for you, good luck

Is there that much energy in semen?? And idek what you mean by life force

Fair enough for the abstaining part, but looking for ways to stop wet dreams because you’re so obsessed with semen retention seems neurotic If wet dreams were harmful to you then that mechanism would not be built into men

IMO the sensible approach to artificial sweeteners is 'why bother taking the risk?' Maybe they're fine or maybe they fuck up your gut biome, make you hungrier, and give you cancer Is it really so important for you to drink some diet coke that you wanna take that risk? Lol

A week or two? Minor energy boost but counteracted by horniness Maybe you get some magical benefits by doing it longer but I struggle to believe that placebo doesn't play a huge role in that. It would be absolutely retarded for evolution to program into your system that ejaculating makes you tired. Like, that shit would get removed from the gene pool ASAP

The problem with this experiment is that there's no way to tell it isn't just placebo I feel like I get a minor energy boost but I also get horny as fuck, which counteracts that energy boost

This just sounds so neurotic to me. Maybe I'm missing something, idk

They’re healthy but if you’re using them as a substitute for sex it will start to make you feel like shit Dont stop fapping necessarily just make sure you’re still fulfilling the sexual relationship part of your life at the same time

Oh, I didn't even notice it was old, lol. Sorry How do you know? Plenty of intellectual ideas are extremely dangerous I mean... Yes. Objectively they are pretty much the most dangerous method of widespread transport we have. Even people who know how to ride them at an expert level die on them every day The problem is that you can't ensure people will interpret it in the right way online. These kind of teachings would have to be administered in person to avoid a lot of the pitfalls. Making intellectually risky ideas like that public is just that.... risky

The solipsism video is particularly dangerous because it's super easy for people to take on as a belief. It's very easy to just believe that you are the only person that exists. But if you just 'believe' in solipsism it will turn you into a narcissist at best or delusional/suicidal at worst. All of these are terrible for you as an individual and strategically bad for actualized.org's reputation which is already perceived as slightly culty It makes total sense to remove that video Anyone who feels so strongly that they need to see that video is likely addicted to Leo's content. There are hundreds of videos on the channel that show you how to attain realisations yourself instead of relying on them being hand fed to you in neat video format

It's an area of life he has a lot of experience with, and it's an area of life that many guys are struggling with It would be silly of him not to share his experience in that area You can't do any of the advanced spiritual stuff unless you have the material basics of your life together first. 'Self-actulization' is derived from Maslow's hierarchy of needs which is based entirely on that principle. So Leo has presumably had that holistic approach since the very beginning of actualized.org

Same reason as alcohol, it gets you into the moment and removes a lot of anxious thoughts you otherwise have. I'd be careful about popping tabs of acid before going to a club unless you're a seasoned psychonaut, that could go very badly wrong if you end up taking too much

I'm confused, why are you not trying to take these girls home? I think I've read a few of your date reports now where it seemed like you could definitely have pulled but didn't for some reason. It's super easy if you build up some rapport with the girl, you literally just suggest that you go back to hers or yours. Most girls (at least where I live) expect guys to try and have sex with them on the first date Girls get turned off by guys who they want to fuck, who they have good chemistry with, but who then don't make sexual advances and take the lead. Guys are supposed to be the sexual initiator, if you're waiting for her do that it will turn her off

Well then spend slightly less time on your hobbies and more time socialising Focusing purely on hobbies at the expense of building a social life is a bad idea. It will make you lonely and then you will be worse at your hobbies Actually, the simplest solution is to take up some social hobbies.

How is your free time so limited? You must be working super long hours at your job With a standard 40 hour work week it's very possible to have Work + Several Hobbies + Socialising going on during your week There is no cure to loneliness other than connecting with people. You're going to have to bite the bullet and start socialsing more at some point. Start social hobbies, that's the best place to start