Loba

@K Ghoul That's usually what it is. Guys like young girls, it's just nature. That's why older guys approach young girls, I was young once, I remember all the old dudes following me around - it certainly wasn't for my personality. Actually, not true, I used to be much sweeter - but sweetness is ignorance.

@Username You probably are that, if you're making assumptions about people based on age. Also, big deal, I look ten years younger than I am, too.

As a woman, it is the man who defines the relationship. If you like her, then define the relationship. I mean, you are leading... are you not? If not then the woman is going to try and define it in her own way, whatever that might be, and it might not be what or how you want it. When men don't define it, she will leave, move on or find ways to try and define it without actually defining anything because she really shouldn't be the one having to do that in the first place if we still had some semblance of cultural norm nowadays, it would be the man who has the ultimate say if the relationship stays or not. Unless she leaves first, but for the most part - it is up to the guy to lead the beginning stages of how things go. You decide your pace, and she follows.

@Federico del pueblo I'm not looking to attract a man, I have everything I need right here, there isn't anything a man can offer me that I don't already have. Younger women should be aware of the realities of dating and I am here, as someone with experience in relationships and dating, and who knows the bullshit men put women through... - if I knew what men were all about at a younger age I would have done much better to protect myself. Older women learn about your ways over time, it isn't a toxic outlook, it's just a very real one.

@K Ghoul I believe it, too - that's probably how deeply you love, and how much reality can hurt sometimes. That's how brutal it can be for a woman in today's world. I wish I'd known about how men really are in my 20's, too, I thought that they loved the same way, to the same extent that women do, but they don't. Divorce sucks, sorry you went through it, but it is probably great to be free in some regards.

When I have a panic attack, if I am home alone - what I do is feel through it and don't think about anything - just feel it all the way through from start to finish. The first few times might be hard, but over time as you practice this it should get easier. What this does it let go of the anxiety stored in your body. View it as, your bottle is too full, and now it is overflowing - you can think and worry and add to the overflowing, or you can not think at all and just feel into it until it goes away on its own. Usually 15 mins - 2 hours it takes for a panic attack to die down. When you do this, the panic can be released, and the attacks will lessen over time. Some things that can help are to get a "sensory packet" together while you do this - things that have calming smells, textures to them. Get a weighted blanket and see if this helps, or a fidget spinner to negate some of that anxious energy while it is happening. It's all about feeling through, and redirecting the energy. I still get panic attacks, but now it is just a body sensation and I don't feel fear anymore, that's the difference. No fear. Often is just feels like I had too much coffee or something.

If you guys are at different places in life, it could be time to let her go. But this is up to you. There are options for people who wish to wait to have kids later in life, too. Have you discussed this, or does she want them at a certain time in life? If so, I would let her find that man who wants to have a child, too. If I were with someone and could not offer them a child (I don't want kids) I would let them go, and remain friends if the relationship was good. There is nothing wrong with changing roles if you guys are in different places in life, letting a relationship go doesn't mean letting the person go, it just means changing some definitions around, you know? You could find someone who doesn't want kids right now, or at all and date for a while and she could find a man who is looking for children soon and if it works out, start her family. For some women, family is very important, and so I wouldn't want to get in the way of her having this chance. But you know, she still has a few years, it isn't like you can't enjoy a relationship for a while longer, either. Communicate all the different options you have and pick one that suits you both the best and go from there.

This is why I've decided to opt out of dating forever and focus all my time on my own interests. I just see here how men try to twist shit around and I don't like it, and the level that it happens on this forum tells me that this is more than just a "this forum" problem, but that men are just aggressive, manipulative, and exploitative. The truth is, they don't care about you, they care about how you look and that is why they are going for you, when you are too young for them. Older women become wiser, it is harder to treat a woman and get away with certain things, it's much easier to do this to a young girl. That's the cold hard truth. It's not you, it's your looks, it never was about you as a person. An individual. This is just how men are. That's reality. A man has a greater vested interest in you not individuating as a person as a toxic mother does. They don't want you to come into your own as a woman - they want you to stay a meek girl forever.

@happyhappy True, it could all be metaphor, maybe it means for the internal - like the biblical war is all within? Or maybe it means, what is happening now - with how we treat the planet, that the end of days could come from collective greed? And that those who have worked on themselves spiritually will be "saved" or "at peace". IDK, I'm just spit balling and have no fixed beliefs on any of it, but I love to speculate on this kind of stuff!

@PurpleTree Na, because I don't try and back it up against others, I have my opinions but at the end of the day they are just that. Opinions. Rarely do I feel someone should be, unless it can serve a greater message.

@Hardkill IDK. I think he should be. He is spreading bad info. On black ppl and the virus... and he has a HUGE platform., let him go. He's corrupt af.

Mary Mueller Shutan and her books. Look at the eyes, a big key.

I would go to NYC - went two times as a kid... amazing city. A lot of culture, diversity, exploration, fun, adventure, immigrants from 'everywhere', food from 'everywhere', very special city. You will learn about more than USA, you will learn about the world.

No. That's not narcissism, on both sides.

I think he should be de-platformed, when saying stuff like this in the public eye... rude words, conspiracy theories... for sure. He has gone backwards, I doubt it will get better... he has a huge fanbase and needs to be cautious. But he won't. And that's why he should be let go. If he isn't - this will get worse - so... people will take his place, maybe someone 'better'.

I don't know, maybe there is one? What if there is? What then? Just questioning, idk the answer.

When I was little, about 6 to 9 I abused some of my pets by chasing them around or hitting them - the reason was because of a very unstable upbringing where it was being done to me, I emulated it in my play, as children mirror what happens to them. I grew out of it and now adore animals and would not harm them. I could bring a hand down and they would not flinch, just sniff my hand, no pets of mine are ever hit or chased. I think people who don't outgrow it don't because they don't have empathy, and so I don't personally know why they are acting from good intentions. I developed empathy where I learned that my actions have consequences i.e., the pet would no longer come over to me anymore. If you see little kids doing things like that, look at the home life of the child, often they are being abused themselves. If you see an adult doing it, they are responsible for their actions and should be held accountable.

All good stuff.

Sure you can. I don't plan on having kids, either - just not something I want to invest my time in and there are already so many people on the planet more qualified than I to raise a child. I plan to breed chihuahua puppies instead in the future, that calls to me... Do things that call to you, if you don't feel that parenting in a good fit for your personality, then listen to it. It isn't about you being happy when it comes to kids, it is about what makes them happy and you have to sacrifice a lot for them. If that isn't you, don't stress it. There are plenty of other people in the world having kids. The world does not need more kids, and it doesn't need more parents who don't fully want them, either. What it needs are people who are smart enough to follow what they feel is best for them. And things can change, too. You are a man, yes? You have time. Pick up a few books on raising children and see if it calls to you, that's what I did - and having kids did not make sense to me. I am happy. I have all the time in the world to do what I like to do, and don't have to answer to anyone and am responsible only for myself and my pets. I am free, not enslaved by family obligations, and it feels great. I love it.

@How to be wise A safe space for people to turn to for help? There isn't anywhere else on the net for people to turn to who are into spirituality and suicidal, it is also a common problem in spirituality - not only because it attracts people seeking an ending to suffering, but because of the things in can bring up. We just have to expect this and seek to offer appropriate advice/emotional support to the best of our ability as a community with this in mind. It's not a forum problem, it is a life problem. People live complicated lives - don't reduce their experience down to "what this forum is turning into".

@Tyler Durden Says Leo, doesn't say any of my authentic awakening experiences from near death and NOT on drugs, but from acutally letting go getting to live. Souls are a thing. I guess you just don't get blessed with that knowledge when you put a drug up your butt. You get solipsism.

No, they will cry and you will be another statistic and their lives will be ruined. Why are you feeling this way and what is causing it? We are souls, not "just" all one, but together in unison. When you cut yourself out of it prematurely, everyone who is attached to you or knows you will have to adjust. Even people here.