Loba

@Preety_India No, I found his posts to be as helpful as what I could get from them, sometimes more, sometimes less - I figured I could just reread a few times to meet him where he was at - I guess I just don't have a problem doing that for people, or at least, I attempt to, for sure. All he has to do is change his writing style to be a bit easier to understand - that's just something that will take a bit of practice. It is clear he isn't the easiest teacher to understand, but that doesn't mean we should knock him down, either - as he's done his best to be helpful and polite and was always a good mod and people are kind of just using this thread to shit on him a bit. It feels disloyal.

@mandyjw I agree, this is pot calling kettle black dude, you don't relate to your audience that well at times and your posts about women leave a bit to be desired for sure. And people have mentioned that to you and there isn't much change on your end that I can see. We all have areas in communication we need to work on. Heck, I am quite a fighty person by nature and have had to learn to tone it down the best I can - and it's going well. I think that he did a fine job as a mod - so maybe he needs to make his posts a little easier to understand for us normies, I don't see why he should be demoted. People change, they grow, give him a chance.

Awww, sorry to hear that Nahm. Love you, dude. We all do, Leo, don't get rid of him from the forum - his advice has been helpful to me at times, when I can understand what he says. IDK if I agree with demoting him. As a mod, he did his job well.

All good, a lot of female vocals for this batch.

I don't think solipsism is real, because from my end, I do exist - and why would people be fighting over if their awareness is the correct one? When I see this, it looks like people are saying they are the ones who exist, yet not me, but from my angle, I am very much here... typing... to you. One... two... three. I can feel my fingers touch the keyboard. There will be a delay when you read this, and perhaps the person you imagine in your mind is not real, but a few minutes prior, I did indeed write this up for you. I subscribe to the essence of God having a lot of different bubbles or partitions in it, because that has been what is true in my direct experience. But all those bubbles are One and unified, connected together. The universe is aware of itself even when I am not, like it collects and stores wisdom for later - so that when the pieces all fit there is that wonderful "aha!" moment. We can choose to make our own way spiritually, there is no reason to follow Leo - just keep following what is in your direct experience, and if it is not true for you, then it is not true and that is perfectly okay. My train of thought will be as follows: I don't have experience of solipsism, but I do of other things and those things claim authority, yet I will set aside practice and space to be wrong for solipsism, provided that during an awakening experience, something can create the actual experience of solipsism, and not just thoughts about what it is - because I already know that speculation isn't it. If it were solipsism, it would just be me - creating an unimaginable amount of detail, but nothing has shown me in my case that I am the "super special actual conscious one and everyone else is fake." When I see people claiming that they are the one's - and I am not - it looks delusional, and I have a feeling that it is. Because here I am, with my own awareness. I wouldn't kill off the perceptions and experiences of other people if I were God - if I could create everything, I would partition it, like bubbles or a grape vine or something, all connected to me, but not aware of it. I would give you your own perceptions and life, that would be the gift. So, assuming I am the "only one" and no one else exists, if I can do anything, and imagine it in any way - then this is what I give to others, is their own perceptions and experiences of life. I worry that with material like this, I feel like just through introspection that I could generate an awakening once a month because I had no preconceived ideas about what it was - and that the constant listening to teachers and talk actually takes away what it could be for me. I think it will be individualized, too, how each person uncovers their own divinity - they have to become their own archeologist and did deep. What if it isn't even solipsism, but it is hand crafted just for you? That awakening to solipsism may be for some, but for others it will go a different route - and each awakening is just as legitimate as the other? So if I awake to souls, bubbles and whatnot, if that is the most true and direct thing I have ever experienced in my life, the sweetest, most connected form of Love I have ever experienced - this is more true than anything that I have felt from Leo's teachings. I'm skeptical. Prove to me, though some sort of feedback loop that wakes me up to this, that I am the "One". I'm not. I couldn't be. Because I am no better than anyone else, and neither are my experiences and perceptions of the level of divinity that I could even call myself purified enough to create an entire world. But maybe waking up in a way, allows you to make the next world? You die into your own dreams. I'm just spitballing different ideas... *big shrug* Solipsism, I don't know.

It can be a good model for understanding how you use your attention, I have found that it has helped me understand my strengths and weaknesses much easier, and helps me to understand somewhat how other people use their attentional habits - I'm an infp, one of the more common personality types found online.

All good! <3

Okay, I can understand this. I can get into "absolute truth", and then out of it. It is just the being-ness. Okay, cool, I have been and this has been working out. I am just concerned that there might be a unique way for me to get to what is true for me, but that I need to follow that innermost intuition to get there - and that it might be different from what is being taught. There is a "You are God" quality to it, co-mingled with like, a chameleon. Hard to explain. Not yet, but each time I let go, I get another chunk of wisdom that does explain it a but better. I did feel them, I could simply follow the same path I took before to feel them again? So what when I am, should I post here then and then ask you, when the experience is more direct/easy to interpret? I can get back to that state, but it might take a few months of shadow work/karma work to clear myself enough to do so. I can become conscious of that, that I dreamed up the Bible. I have before. It just doesn't stick for too long. I mean, I could use any holy book and find something enlightening in it, not just the Bible. But yeah, I can see how there is the ego, and then just the screen of awareness. It is like when I dream and there is a backstory for it, an entire world, and I know my place and how to operate within it, and I am someone or something completely different, and each night that whole world goes away. But each night, me and those dream characters chip away like I do in this world, to find the truth. They look for it, too. Not just me, and they offer wisdom I can apply on "this side" of reality. I get that this is a story, that there is just the screen - because when it is revealed, everything is more crisp and clear. I feel like I have been close, or "been there", but am not there now, so I know how this is just a dream on some levels because I can "snap out of it", and then another story bleeds through. It is kind of semi-psychotic like that, but each layer that is removed gets me closer to just Be-ing. Have you only had the God experiences, or anything biblical or paranormal before? Because they give the same message, and come in through a similar process of changing lenses, or disidentification, as a God realization, so there might be aspects to this that you have not been privy to yet - same as me, I just haven't gotten quite there yet, but can intuit that there is a lot more. Or "nothing", but a deeper understanding of what that means. I know it is all a dream, but my experiences were direct, like the same path to get to solipsism. Go through death, let go, be in the moment and appreciate, and it becomes a unifying Love field. And just... Now. And done. Now. And done. Now. And done. And from there, comes in paranormal. I "now and done" until the world becomes even more complex. It's just... very hard for me to combine your experience and mine, when I know in my deepest heart that there are souls. I felt my "family" guiding me. I will ask again these questions while I am experiencing them and see what I can learn from you then because the mind will be open in a way that can really "download" a lot of new ways of understanding the world that are completely alien as of this point. Thanks for the reply.

@Leo Gura How do you know your perspective is absolute? I've had awakenings where it feels just as final. Why should I follow you over what God has told me? Not asking in a persnickety way, I am curious. What makes your awakenings more absolute than mine - when mine seem to have a biblical aspect to them, and there seem to be a lot of similar cosmologies out there, including souls. Partitions. Bubbles. I felt them, for sure. I think you're wrong for now, but also am open to being wrong.

@Preety_India That would be the other side of it if she is true, and we can't determine this based on the amount of info he has given, but in my experience, giving out money ended up with me getting emotionally scammed. Let's see what OP has to say, maybe there is more to the story.

I agree with Roy and Yarco, I have helped people in situations in the past and they became very dependent on it, and I did it out of care/concern for them and it was not ever paid back/ I was still not treated well/ no gratitude for my efforts. You could get scammed easily, too, in these situations. Just be careful. Don't keep offering her money all the time - and do it when you feel like you want to, not because you feel pressured.

My family is indoctrinated into the "scientific" way of discovering things; so my "religion" is viewed the way religious people often view non-religious people. Telling them I was into spirituality and that I found God - they thought it was insanity, the same way religious people think those who are not are going to hell. I just don't talk about it much anymore because they refuse to be open minded to the idea.

How true did it feel for you? Idea - write it all out, save it somewhere and then don't write or talk about it again - (Why? It keeps the experience fresh and prevents the ego from co-opting it that can happen when you mull it over too much - so now I just write it out once and let it go...) Instead, live out and act accordingly with what the experience taught you - and if you are moved towards a better way of living and relating with your world, then it is truth. A lot of times, lessons from spiritual experiences need to be test run by you first to determine if they are true. We can only determine so much with awakenings that aren't our own, because they are so personal to the individual and awakenings happen in so many different ways. What if it is truth for you, but not for someone else? That's why you have to test out the lessons and apply them, and then see how they work in your life. Gl!

Journaling, coffee, weed, introspection practice, a small amount of meditation, writing about the emotions I am feeling in order to work through them helps a lot, uhm... my goal(s) is simple, it's just to have a normal day-schedule of caring for myself, and whatever else positive that comes from these new good habits. Sometimes, when I feel inspired enough, I will draw something.. but this is rare.. The journal section helps me a lot in keeping track of what I am doing during the days, because although introverted, I am still a communal creature and I like to be around other people with similar goals.

@Bow24Maybe he just doesn't have an answer as to the reason and assumes there is no reason, I say this because in my awakenings I was given a reason, and the reason was just to witness itself as itself. Simultaneously, there was no reason for that, other than it would bring heaven on earth.

@Leilani Yeah, I heard ancestors/angels in music and felt Love and unity all around me, like everyone was singing in unison in the present moment, and I could feel the illusion of time, or perhaps some sort of singularity pulling me towards it and I realized that I had always been in this spot and always will be, and that there will just be the illusion of things moving past me - like a wave or something - and I could feel everyone's souls that ever lived, like a grapevine, clustered and connected to the Source, and the universe told me that the meaning of life is to be aware of God and to spread God in this world, that is the plan, the universe wants to witness itself while "Awake" - and I could see it looking back at me through everything in my livingroom, it all kind of blended together, and fruits tasted so much more pure after this experience, and the air smelled so fresh outside - I was "saved" with this knowledge and want to get back to that state of being so I can understand more. It was like the plane of consciousness itself is aware of itself and develops ways to awaken itself - even sometimes suffering - it was a clear sightedness - I could see God in the mist in the blue mountains - all some massive feedback loop happening all in the present moment - Now - I learned about how "as above, so below" God is like a fractal, or a divine machine, in how everything moves so orderly and perfect. This moment is perfect. There was a unified plane of consciousness - and then if you can imagine it being like bubble wrap, that is folded up, or something - those are the souls - which are made out of the plane of consciousness, I could feel their divine Love and Innocence and their heartsong all around me. If Leo has not experienced this, then there might be a facet missing, just like I have many points of the whole puzzle missing, too, and am in the process of putting them together. I found God through the algorithms, by following my ultimate truth when I was having my first and most severe autoimmune flareup - kind of like Leo, I had to come to terms with possibly dying at a younger age than I would like and had to actually come to accept death as a reality, not conceptually, and all I could do was offer appreciation in the moment for how beautiful a song sounded, and how lovely the mountains look. I learned that is how to get God closer to you is to offer appreciation for the present moment - and nature is so wise you can see life within it, nature is God's vehicle for communication. Now I can see when people are very "awake" and I can see God in various forms of artwork and in nature and stuff and if I follow it, it leads be back to some sort of awesome epiphany. Leo looks very 'awake', by the energy he carries in his eyes - so I keep my mind open to solipsism as a possibility, but due to the depth that it took me to get to my awakenings, it would take another awakening generated by my own efforts in order to move me in that direction - so I am just waiting for wherever the wind blows - and I'll follow that. If you go through and NDE, a lot of times people will get siddhis or a certain kind of sensitivity. God is in the process of waking itself up to itself, and the whole world will follow suit - once it catches like a wildfire.

Try Richard Grannon's fortress therapy course. I used some of it, I didn't stick with it but it did help a bit. For me, the main problem is sticking to something to see if it would work, so I'm not the best person to discuss actual healing with, as I still have a ways to go - but am getting better! And feel hopeful. See if what he says resonates and go from there, if not, there are plenty of people on YouTube offering advice for healing from trauma, but to be honest, it will be a lifelong journey to heal, there is only a road, no destination.

I'm open to it, as I am open to anything that allows me to have an awakening into understanding more of myself, but the way OP describes it is the way that I have felt it in my direct experience as one of the deepest and most profound discoveries. It was all one thing, but everyone was partitioned, in like "bubbles" of their own awareness - I went through 'real' death, not conceptual, to understand this - I wonder if you have only just experienced your bubble for some reason? Have you had awakenings to other bubbles, ever? If so, how do you explain them from a solipsistic lens?

@PurpleTree I did! After my parents pass away, I will have two small rooms open - the third room will house my small dog breeding hobby - this is like waaaay in the future - if this place is still around I'll put an ad for a few roommates. I will own the home and the rent will be cheap, in a nice neighborhood, and the house is cute - middle class neighborhood, pet/420 friendly. But my folks are doing well, so I don't foresee anything happening for another 10-20 years. Who knows if this place will be around for that long.

Try green cities in USA, like Seattle or San Francisco. I used to live in Seattle, a lot of food and clothing banks, a tent city, you could just walk around the city and live off it if you wanted to. Does get rainy, so buy a tent.