Miguel1

Try basic letting go work: Go take a comfortable seat / lay down on your bed. Now visualize the group events happening. As you start to get more tensed up, feel into the feelings and bodily sensations more. Dive deeper into the feelings and sensations with your deep inhales. Welcome them and accept them. Finally, let them go with your deep exhales. Do this for 5-10min+ and as many times a day as you feel like.

I’m a professional level, my own version of hip hop dancwr. I never use my dancing skills in a club. I just fool around in the dancing floor. Most people looking at me dancing in a club will think I can’t dance at all. The only time I dance seriously in a club if I am really enjoying the song and want to express it with my dancing. It is never to impress.

Go out and learn to meet new women. You will find more amazing women than her and then it will be very easy to let her go.

I haven’t been kicked out of a club for years. In the beginning, ten years ago, when I was uncalibrated and not smooth, I did get kicked out and maybe even banned from a club or two. First of all, nowadays I’m friends with almost all the bouncers and staff (staying in one city so it is easier), but then, Since when talking to girls is prohibited? Especially in a socially lubricated place like a club? Your fear of coming across a creep is what makes you come across like a creep. Never forget this: everyone is allowed to start a conversation, everyone is also allowed to reject the conversation. These two points has to be respected. Or am I missing something? Are you talking about something completely else that doesn’t even cross my mind? Like harassing or breaking the rules / laws? Obviously don’t do any of these. If you clearly get a harsh no / a strong no, then back off and move on. Wish them a good rest of the night and go talk to someone else. What am I missing? It’s not rocket science. When it comes to socializing, taking action is worth much more than theorizing in your head.

Perhaps this is selfish. What is the need to be so radical? What is the need to neglect yourself? What is the need for people to be selfless? What is the need for you to be completely “selfless”? Surely you must be gaining something, otherwise why do all this? Maybe that something is selfish. Contemplate that.

You are not selfless for other people. You are selfless for yourself because it increases your life satisfaction via integrity, goodness, honesty, and character. So ultimately it is a selfish thing After all, God is alone.

What Leo said and also, How can I improve if I don't approach? How can I build a thick skin if I don't get rejected? How can I get over the fear of approaching (which causes you to get rejected), if I don't build a thick skin? I've been rejected thousands of times, that at this point I don't even realize that it is a rejection. In my head, it is just a bunch of noise, funny noise to be exact. I get into social mood when I get rejected. The harsher the rejection, the faster I will get into the mood and flow.

Owen Cook. I really look upto this guy and he has been a role model for the past 15 years but what the hell are all the stuff he spouts out around the Covid pandemic? Is this some kind of scheme to push people to think for themselves and learn critical thinking? I dont think he would spout such nonsense just to push people to do so. It would actually achieve the opposite. Anti-mainstream is not critical thinkint and thinking for yourself. In a lot of cases if not most, it is more sheep thinkint than mainstream thinking. Someone make sense to me? Perhaps I just gotta accept that he has some hella weird ideas and blindspots, just like everyone else. I can still learn a lot from him. ——- In a nutshell, he thinks that people who took Covid seriously and the vaccines, are sheeps who couldnt think for themselves and just blindly followed the masses.

Aside from Covid and his position on it, How would you guys define him through the filter of Spiral Dynamics? Trying to make sense. Such a complicated person. He's everywhere from orange and above.

Thanks guys. Makes sense.

Ahah, that explains why my request went nowhere And the first time I requested was a year ago!

Finland might be the only exception. Or am I being naive?

If this is true (and not a marketing strategy), then it will be really interesting to see what kind of higher-level developmental stuff he will be focusing on, bringing to the table and teaching. The comments below (that this whole thread is about) are from the following video: https://youtu.be/s1N4lzSJ6QQ -- The questions I have are: Is this just another marketing scheme? If not, then why is he using Time as the reason for letting go, rather than deep Exhaustion (becoming bored) to the point that he is finally truly ready to start letting go? Perhaps he is using time, rather than exhaustion because of sales? ''Oh, Owen is becoming bored with girls and isn't passionate about chasing them anymore, why should I take his program then?'' That being said, it is kinda the same with the Time excuse: ''Oh, Owen has better stuff to do with his time than chasing girls, he doesn't even care that much about it anymore, why should I take his program?'' Or better yet: ''What is it that Owen wants to be focusing on so much more than chasing girls? I want to focus on that too!'' -- Would be truly amazing and beautiful to see Owen slowly dropping the deep attachment to material stuff and starting to seriously dive much deeper into the higher psychological developmental and spiritual stuff. Been following this guy's development for like 15 years.

Definitely not late at all. You are well on time. Just start now

@Twega @Bobby_2021 This. The guy’s a marketer first and foremost, and deeply stage orange. Deep attachment to making money.

Is this guy trolling? You speak in circles and yourself into a bag (Finnish saying ), bro.

@mr_engineer All this is doing exactly what you are trying not to do: you are giving the women too much value and power. In a fun social situation, treat the girls as silly girls. How would you treat your 13-year-old little sister (aside from the sexual part)? It would be all fun and games. Silly stuff, non-serious. Lots of teasing and playfulness. This is how you truly don't give them too much power. What you are doing now just seems like that on the surface, but deep down you are boiling. It is just the function of Fake Confidence. Not True Confidence. True confidence comes from the core. -- Seems like you are just in a vulnerable place and I understand because game can be brutal (understatement), especially in the beginning. Just understand this: generally, the less you care, the better results you will get. It is very counter-intuitive. The tricky part is how to get to the less-caring stage, as a beginner. Well, a massive amount of approaches (hard work). Faking it till you make it can also be a very powerful tool when used in a healthy way. Basically, you want to get to unconscious competence. You are probably at the stage of conscious incompetence right now: 1. Unconscious incompetence 2. Conscious incompetence 3. Conscious competence 4. Unconscious competence Just like learning how to drive a car. A ton of hard work at first, until it becomes second nature.

I don't remember the last time a girl said this to me. It's possible I have never even gotten this. If you are getting this, then you are doing something badly wrong, as a man, in the approach itself. But anyway, even if I did get this, my response would be, depending on my mood, something like "Well, you better run '', or "Yes, and proud of it. '', and walk away to approach another girl in front of her (in a fun, properly calibrated way, like a proper man). -- Getting triggered and defensive over this is similar to if someone called you a horse, or an alien (alien rat), or a house, or a car... You would not care, simply because it is not true, and you would laugh it off. For me it would most likely (unless I am in a heavy, negative space) actually come across funny if someone called me a horse: '', what makes you think that? Do I look like a very fast runner?'' Basically, you get triggered and defensive only because it is At Least somewhat true. Especially during a social and fun situation. And finally, you mention that you don't want to ''reward'' their bad behavior. Well... When you get triggered by these lower-conscious, negative people, you are actually giving them exactly what they want: your ego getting poked. Ignoring them and moving on is the best punishment.

Just bumped into your apology blogpost. Powerful, beautiful! These are the moments we live for in personal development! Even tho, while experiencing them in the moment, they feel like hell, but later in retrospect, they are the most valuable moments, as far as the human domain goes. Strongly suggest everyone to read Leo’s latest blogpost, and reflect deeply on what you can learn. These deep openings are very rare. https://www.actualized.org/insights/my-apology-01

I noticed the shift in your tone and approach and wanted to take a moment to express appreciation and gratitude. Even tho I understand that the harsher approach has its uses and times, I believe this more softer (not too soft to compromise), loving and understanding approach shows the health of the forum and perhaps, your psyche. That being said, obviously never ”compromise” on the truth and rawness of what is! But that goes without saying. Thank you for being a huge role model and a tremendous source of inspiration. And thank you for creating and maintaining this space for us to be able to come together to learn and grow, all completely for free. Much love.

Hey guys, I think I might be starting to build an unhealthy relationship with obsessively eating clean. Is clean eating for you absolutely 100% clean eating? As in, never ever having any junk food, any cakes, any chocolate and ice cream? Or is it more like an 80/20 rule for you? 90/10? 95/5? -- What about bad additives? What about heavy metals? How badly do you avoid these? I am not perfectly knowledgeable about additives, and it seems like the understanding of some additives being unhealthy may change to neutral as science develops. It would be awesome if you can list additives that are absolute no. I live in Finland (Europe), so I believe the regulations here are much better and tighter than in the USA (in case this info is any useful). -- Are you vegetarian? Vegan? Do you do Keto? Do you follow a plan of x amount of carbs, proteins, and fats? How much saturated fat do you allow yourself to eat? How much greens, fruits, and salads do you consume? Any rules on eggs? What do you think of nuts? What do you think of rice, pasta, potatoes? - I'm not sure how is it there in the USA, but in Europe, we have rice and pasta that are wholegrain. Finally, processed food doesn't necessarily mean unhealthy, but let's talk about unhealthy processed food. How much do you allow yourself? Hopefully, I'm not missing anything. -- I am reflecting on whether I am becoming way too perfectionist about all this. Would love to hear ya'll thoughts and @Michael569 , would love to have you chip in as well, since you are the professional here Much love.

Yup. And if this is too much, then you can start with just by asking for directions or perhaps even time.

Expose yourself to massive experience + a ton of contemplationg & reflection + calming your mind.

First of all, she is not your girlfriend after a week. Second of all, getting low quality girls (both internal and external) on Tinder is a completely different thing vs getting high quality girls. Finally, go out and approach girls - learn to be a proper man.