bastih

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About bastih

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  • Location
    UK
  • Gender
    Male
  1. Hi, I need some solutions, I feel like I'm stuck in an endless loop, where I rotate between being totally lazy and then periods of working hard as much as I can till the burnout hits and then going back to the starting point. I have a job which I feel I should love (I work for a sports betting company), which fits perfectly my interests and my life, but I don't love working there, sometimes I hate it a lot. I have a girlfriend which does a lot for me, loves me and she's always there when I need her, yet I can't feel the same towards her. I'm miserable all the time, unhappy, lazy, lots of bad habits, getting addicted to things like weed or gaming very easily. I'm trying to improve, fight against those bad habits, but I always fail, I always keep going back to them, I only have strength and motivation to keep going only for so long, it always exhausts me at some point and I need MONTHS to regenerate mentally to give it another try, even though I know it's not gonna work. I started therapy half a year ago, I'm learning more and more about myself but I can't find the way to break the cycle, I've been trying for years. I know I'm a very weak human being, but I can't help it. I hate myself for it, I always give in.
  2. Hi, I've recently moved to the letting go meditation where I just don't try to do anything, I even let go the desire to let go as Leo said in one of his guided meditations. This way works best for me in terms of not thinking during meditation but whenever I really let go I have this weird, heavy feeling in my chest as if my lungs were pressured. It's hard to describe it but it's in a way relief but also I can't take it for too long, it exhausts me pretty quickly. Did anybody experience something like this? I know Leo was talking about being superconductor where you don't even feel the negative emotions going through you but my experience is far from that. After this kind of meditation I feel better and more clear minded but still it's hard for me to stay in it for more than 15 minutes really. Will it pass with time? I don't feel many negative emotions, I don't really experience many emotions at all, I didn't feel really happy for the past four years but I don't feel sadness either. Should I just keep going with it or adjust it?
  3. One interpretation that I think is missing here is the fact that much evidence indicates that the Earth has been destroyed many times and civilizations were wiped out. For example Pyramids and Sphinx are sophisticated buildings in their construction that would be very hard to replicate even with today's technology. I really recommend to watch this video on how advanced those pyramids were. Much of the evidence emerging lately suggests that the pyramids are much older than they are believed to be by the mainstream science. That would mean that there was an ancient, advanced civilization that was capable of building such a complex structures and it must've been wiped out. What if the 7 burning suns in Buddhist apocalypse just mean 7 comets that would destroy the earth?
  4. @allislove Thanks for that, will definitely try this out @Nahm yeah sure you can pm me
  5. I had a break for studies and couldn't devote much time to training my abilities. I am working as a trader and I earn on difference between selling and buying prices on sports market. Today I tested my ESP abilities and tried to predict which greyhound is gonna win. There are 6 greyhound in a race so I have 16.67% chance of predicting correctly. Out of the first 4 races I predicted winning greyhound 3 times, I was pretty confident in them winning and I felt tired after that, then my next bets were losing and I lost my confidence and I wasn't really happy with my predictions and out of the next 12 races I only predicted 1 correctly. This is something I've noticed a while ago. It's like I am using some sort of mental energy and I am able to predict correctly at the beggining but with time and effort I lose this ability and it's harder for me to see clearly. I'll have to experiment with it more and read more books on this subject.
  6. @Nahm when playing football I fell on my hand and something was wrong with it and it didn't heal properly after that and it causes me pain.
  7. Hi, I've had a wrist problem for about 2 years now and I went to the doctor and he said everything was fine, then I went to the physiotherapist and she tried to fix it but it didn't really help much. I am looking for some guides/books for healing and maybe some advice from you what's your way of healing yourself with your mind? cheers
  8. So I have dropped my affirmations and started working with my meditation habits and reading. I was just chilling for a past two days and today I started slowly coming back to my good habits. I feel a little bit overwhelmed because of the amount dopamine that hit me in the last 2 days. I guess to create perfect life I need to find balance between work and fun. At the moment I have no idea what the balance might be but I'm pretty sure I can't do much work before I feel burned. I'll do it step by step and see where it'll take me.
  9. I've tried healing my wrist today but I wasn't succesful, maybe I can't channel enough energy to it. Maybe I need more time to actually heal it. I spent only around 3 minutes on doing that. Maybe this process must be longer. I need more knowledge on this subject.
  10. I would start by watching those 2 videos. I do affirmations for 5 minutes and then I follow with 5 mins ofVisualization. But you need to find your best way that suits you the best imo.
  11. hi, my biggest goal atm is to progress on a spiritual path and even though I don't care about materialistic world as I do about my enlightment it's crucial for me to change. With the way I am now it'd be impossible for me to achieve anything on my career path, let alone spiritual path. I've started changing myself in October 2020 with meditating for 1 min a day. I know it looks really funny but I would never expect better results than I've got from this. Later I added reading 1 page of a book per day and it scaled quite nicely. Before February 2021 I was meditating for 20 minutes a day and reading 50 pages per day. I had a habit of watching Ajahn Brahm every morning but with time his stories were very repetitive and I dropped it. When February came I've added one 5-minute affirmation but then I thought it would be better with visualization so I added 5 mins of visualization of it. But then I thought it might be worth to add other affirmations and I added 4 other affirmations so I basically added almost 1 hour of new stuff to my day and I expected it to work. Little did I know and my whole strategy crashed as soon as my girlfriend's birthday came. I couldn't force myself to do all the meditating and affirmating on hangover. A week later there was Valentine's day and same storry happened. My brain was overloaded and I didn't have enough will power to overcome every obstacle that came into my way. I never realized that those affirmations were the problem until now. Now I know that I need to get rid of them, at least for now. I'll be adding them with time like every other thing. I don't know what I was expecting to be honest haha. I lost a whole month but I learned a valuable lesson. I have a resolution for this year to read 52 books, one each week and I've only read 7 so I am already behind the schedule. I guess after removing affirmations from my day it'll become much easier to read my books.
  12. I fell asleep again, it's weird because I had full 8 hours of sleep and didn't expect I'd still need more. Again I was dreaming. I had argument with my girlfriend which happens frequently during my dreams. I felt very isolated as we share many mutual friends and everyone was on her side even though I didn't do anything wrong. I can't even remember what we were arguing about. Yet another not particularly pleasant dream. But I talked to God before I fell asleep again and he told me that I have to go through everything to purify myself. I asked him to show me the path and lead me and deep down I expected easy path, I expected him to take me there but now I know it's not possible. I have to grow to get where I want to get. I have to be prepared for the worst and be strong.
  13. I had a lot of dreams during night, most of them were not nice. One dream was literally like a horror movie, being in it I knew the plot and I even knew how long it was. There were deamons that looked like people and they wanted to murder me. Another dream was about me being in school, secondary school. I very often think about those years as the best years of my life. But still even though I was with friends there, I was scared most of the time because I wasn't going to pass year because of my attendace at German language. I always hated it and I hated the teacher. In real life I almost didn't graduate high school because of my attendance at German language. Before going to sleep I had huge headache, I tried healing my self but failed to do so. I knew i was gonna fail. No energy to do it. Question is if I really didn't have energy or I just thought I didn't have it. I guess both would result in the same outcome. I asked OM to help, but I didn't feel anything. Then I called God in my native language and I felt him. I surrendered to him and he healed me. henever I think about him or I do something while having him in the mind I feel much better. I have so much studying to do for next week so I can't devote as much time as I'd like to devote to my spiritual path and learning about psychic powers, but I will spend some time on it nevertheless.
  14. I am just starting with developing psychic powers, don't know much about them but I think I have natural gift for them. Today I healed my girlfriend just after watching one video on healing and then tried to heal myself but I was exhausted after healing her and my healing didn't last for long. I healed my girlfriend's leg and she is very sceptical about everything but she was amazed how this worked. It didn't heal her fully, after about 10 minutes pain came back but she told me it was like 20-40% of the previous pain. When I tried healing myself it only worked for 2 minutes and then pain came back fully but I felt it wasn't gonna work on me, I was so tired after healing her. I download an app called ESP trainer and I've tried using my mental power to predict colours but it didn't work. I felt it wasn't gonna work but I am sure it'll work one day