Natasha Tori Maru

Many people collapse compassion and tolerance onto one thing. But laying down a boundary with someone who has mental health issues is the most honest form of compassion there is. It is not a lack of empathy. Compassion : how you see them. Boundaries : how you protect yourself. Easy to confuse healthy boundaries and compassion with judgement and rejection. If you make this mistake it points to unhealthy boundaries within you. Leo isn't judging or rejecting those with mental health issues.

@Alexop yep. Some of the issues when the balance goes out. I am not anti-feminist, but I do see some mother's raising men and teaching them that men are bad or wrong. Masculine is bad or wrong. Couple that with broken families where father's are absent (no healthy masculine figure), it can be made to look like (to the young boy) that the father treated the mother poorly. And mothers can play into this with their sons and daughters. You end up with men hating their masculinity. Self hate and dysphoria. Cucked soy boys who are capitulating and soft. And overly dominent woman. So it's men with un-integrated masculine, and women with un-integrated feminine. Basically they end up with either a masculine or feminine shadow. This is just one of many dynamics that can happen. Not saying it is the only one or the most common.

@darkspring001 if you are going to have a relationship with this person - romantic or otherwise - you will have to be extremely confident, healthy and candid. Excellent boundaries. Often this simply will not work because those with mental illness reject healthy boundaries as they do not recognise them as love. They receive it as rejection. In reality a good boundary is about saying 'I need this, so I can give you the love you deserve'. My ex developed schizophrenia and my stepdad is a sufferer, also. You will have to come to terms with being more than just a friend or lover - but a carer also. It is what it is when dealing with severe mental health issues. Often the carer role can run up against the lover role. Really difficult to continually lay down hard boundaries and provide care and also maintain desire. 🤍🙏

@Alexop I think men in today's climate suffer from un-integrated MASCULINE believe it or not. The younger men who are in more trouble I mean. The ones falling behind ☹️

In the context of the discussion men who have mastery of both axis of power (social manipulation + brute strength). But in a wider sense it shows up as a man who can defend without needing to dominate, admit when wrong, express affection openly, lead without ego fragility & creates psychological safety around him. I think of it as power + restraint, action + awareness, strength + sensitivity. It's not about submissiveness, being soft or passive.

Yeah I spent my summers growing up on a farm and in the Blue Mountains national park. The Riverina farming lands of Australia. Your feet can be bare to an extent, the callousness gets insane. A think barrier helps. It's the padding in the shoes that is generally needed for concrete/asphalt. Youth will carry you somewhat. But back, hip, ankle, knee shit come from the shitting urban environments and turd footwear.

I never said it was a solution without issues. I never even said it was a sufficient solution. I just proposed it as an idea that I had not seen implemented. Careful heh heh heh - those scary thoughts!

A man who knows the social game in and out sorta scares me a bit! It's always the men with a fully integrated feminine side that present the most 'threat'. Not that threat is even the right word. Present with the most power, I should say.

Yep, the fixation on which sex is in power being some magical juju that will fix everything isn't it.

I agree. I think a solution isn't going to entail men or women in power - it's always about balance. Both. It's not like it is just men who are violent. Women are as well. A man in power with fully integrated feminine is what I want to see.

The logic of blaming anyone else for our own reaction/conduct doesn't stand. Equally you cannot hold a woman responsible for giving birth to xxx type of evil/bad/whathaveyou. Genetics from both sides loades the gun. Environment pulls the trigger. Women are forced into an awakening to unity through the birthing process. Many integrate it as Love in recognition - and many often reject it. There may not be the same intellectual breakdown of that truth as it is reached through feeling. Typically I see it heavier on the integration side over intellectual understanding. Both are needed though. I think, Leo, your points regarding raw power are valid. But consider this is a problem (needing to fight wars) born of the solution of men in power (who are used to using force to achieve). Raw power might not even be needed without the problem that created it. I'll add that there is a bit of naivety here. Women are absolutely ruthless social manipulators. If raw power is the man's game, the woman's is a subtle game of manipulation behind the scenes. And women had to learn to do this because they were stripped of sovereignty - it was the only way to survive. Social manipulation.

We ain't designed to walk on concrete/asphalt. Barefoot may be better but not in an urbanised environment.

@AtmanIsBrahman what do you consider the most truthful teaching? Your average person will only care about truth insofar as it can be utilised in some way.

🎯 I might add we are all corrupt on different levels, across different domains. Some are more aware of it. I would generalise and claim truth seekers might be less so. But I have been bloody surprised before!

Hmmmm. Pure truth could be recognised as unity. Infinity. We are all It. Recognising self in other - teaching truth could simply be the attempt at integration of truth itself. Self helping self. Self dissolving all that stands between subject/object. To raise anothers consciousness is to raise our own. But really, survival is a powerful force. It is very important to recognise awakening to truth does not exclude us from incentive structures - and genetics. This might help explain the corruption in spiritual teachers. And motivation.

Heh heh, all humans are terrified of the womb. They want to get back in so badly. Fixated on death as a method to escape thoughts of the womb. The original unity. Happy to talk about death forever with not a thought about coming into the awareness. Just think about it, most people view the womb with revulsion. Birth is treated as revolting. Blood. Body fluids. Shit. Piss. Placenta. Something to contemplate.

@Valach yep I had to go through a long healing process - I go into it a bit more in the link below. A bit of back and forth between me and @bazera if you want to hear some anecdotes 🙂 https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/113167-why-has-dating-collapsed-the-real-reason-no-one-talks-about/?do=findComment&comment=1741602

@Valach I agree with your values changing once you heal. Although I am a woman, many of my male circle report attractiveness being less of a priority in a mate. Screening for a healthy, stable and mature mate overtakes prioritising physical attractiveness. Many even claim searching for an attractive mate was less about them and more about status broadcasting when they were younger. Maturity, intellect and stability become the attraction factor. Values change as we heal. Just my experience with a circle of 6/7 dudes who report the same transition. We are all between 39-45 years old.

@Valach very similar crossover with attachment theory, what you touch on above.

@Lila9 😍

Yep, this. I'm not talking about maternity leave or benefits like that. My idea was to treat motherhood as a legitimate occupation that would supply a commodity - people. Workers. Which will boost the economy and sustain capitalism. It won't come without its own set of issues. Necessity is a powerful push for compromise. I do not think a policy like that has ever been proposed in western countries. I don't know of any countries that have tried it.

If you are communicating with another human - there are emotions involved. It is just ignorance if you think this isn't happening. Emotions are transmitted, received and form part of the communication - as well as words and context.

@Carl-Richard was going to note that proposing kids help out with LOOKING AFTER THEMSELVES is a good habit to be instilling into them - but felt it was a bit obvious 😂😂😂

@WonderSeeker I've been present for birth (my brother's) and death (my grandfather's). These two moments are so intense. You are literally witnessing Truth express itself through living organisms; division, union, love & God all at once. There are no words.

@Basman has it been done?