Natasha Tori Maru

Is it? Or is it a language? A language is a concept. Or overlay. Added onto experience. The operations surely aren't direct experience: plus, minus, power, root, factorial.... These are man made concepts for observed behaviour.

...As a nootropic Tell me your protocols? I've been taking 10g creatine monohydrate (unflavoured) a day (I am a small person) for brain benefits for 2 months. So far: increased focus increase memory retention zero energy dips through the day attention and complex task application + cognitive ability has improved MARKEDLY. Especially scheduling projects (working with lead times, processes, contractor schedules, delivery timing and dependancies) and unusual problems. I am finding solutions faster and able to execute with more efficiency. This process always involves research and learning as well as formulating a solution so it can be quite taxing. mood regulation lowered incidence of negative moods, especially stress resilience I smash a ridiculous amount of water with it. I haven't noticed any side effects - I am not experiencing any anxiety or water retention. For whatever reason my particular physiology is responding to it VERY well. Weights and running capacity are up. I eat only vegetables, fish, eggs, cottage cheese, nuts and some chicken. Occasional red meat. Drink tea and coffee. I do not consume a lot of meat. Other supplements: Liquid iron, K2 + Vit D + Magnesium & fish oil.

@Shermaningeorgia Do you have many people close to you? Intimacy with family and friends? Do you socialize and get out a lot? Nature? Exercise?

It depends what type of therapy and what you are attending for. In most cases I would say it is highly beneficial. It can be difficult finding someone you connect with - which can prevent patients finding help. It does not do to have to 'shop' for a therapist - but like with anything - the message often depends on how it is packaged. CBT can be hands down fantastic for addressing assumptions and cognitive bias - and this is probably the best type for those with especially high intellect; because the full force of reason and logic stand at the base of beliefs - but the bias (selectively seeing what evidence we want to prove our view) stops us seeing the whole of reality. An example of cognitive bias 'I am hopeless' could be rooted in shame. Someone was rejected in youth by a group - they walked away with the incorrect belief that they 'bothered' the group. They were not wanted or 'wrong' in some way. This turns into social anxiety and never approaching anyone. Shame. Or developing massive fears around any sort of interaction. This is because the cognitive bias is pointing the sufferer to the wrong meaning by only seeing one set of data from experience. In actuality - the evidence they may miss is that the person they approached was busy on the phone, and did not respond because they were engaged in a serious call. But they do not see this, they just see and feel rejection, and the shame spiral is reinforced. The interesting thing is that this conclusion is actually completely logical - which is why the most intelligent people have the deepest bias. The full force of their intelligence is behind it. It is just the wrong data to be looking at. A good CBD therapist can show you the missed data in your experience that you are overlooking. But this requires honesty with yourself and the therapist. If that is not present - any progress can be difficult.

This is at the heart of it. I feel what I propose gets the engine running. But both components are ways to tackle the problem (action, mental work)

I do not quite grasp the point of your entire argument 'all your advice is bad because there is fear'. OP needs tools to build good habits that become reflexes. And that comes from doing. Which arises from courage. Not reducing fear. Hard work is just the building of habits that lowers the threshold for impulse to act. It becomes so low 'doing stuff' is the default. Then there is less energy needed to do the thing. It is simply a reflex. So hard work seems reduced. There's is no thinking needed. Just plain doing. But on this topic you and I disagree entirely. Change the belief through experience/doing to unravel the fear and change perspective. That is all. One needs to to self enquiry to work on the mindset/belief and then take action to apply and gain new experiences to reinforce a new set of beliefs. Or, truth.

@Joshe but that is the essence of my point - you need help if your issues are so deep you cannot function. Which is a side point to the OPs question. Beliefs behind the scenes are the issue. Hard work is still needed. Even what you propose is the very definition of hard work. Your definition of courage is very strange.

@Leo Gura hey boss... Christmas special video? Plez?

Yes my example was an acute scenario, I do agree. I suppose we would need to branch off into acute & chronic fear situations. I am firmly of the opinion any form of chronic fear that is leading to immobilisation and inhibition is a deeper psychological issue that I am unqualified to deal with. This implies that normal operation of the individual is not working - which is one of the criteria that one generally defines for a pathology, and formal diagnosis. I feel chronic fear of this type is not something that can be assisted by myself and requires a trained professional. But the topic of hard work - it is a perspective/belief issue. And I will always maintain that courage is the quality needed as a driver to push past fear. Hard work and labour are a matter of perspective.

Mic drop We cannot be our best for others without taking care of ourselves, first and foremost. As counter intuitive as that can seem. You are directed to put on your oxygen mask first in an air-emergency. Ouch - can relate. Been there (◍•.•◍)♡

It is always the presuppositions that lead to misunderstanding in arguments - the definition of 'intellect' is case in point here! And do we not think this also may tie into the blog post regarding meditation? Because there are many forms of meditation - and we again presuppose one form is being spoken of by Leo. If he is referring to a wider scope of all forms of meditation; then one cannot really have serious intellect without it. The deep enquiry into the nature of existence would mean we address assumptions and presuppositions... we approach our own thinking with such awareness as to go meta with our thinking. To reveal our own bias. Bring clarity and depth to anything we apply ourselves to. We would probably disagree less. Realize where the misunderstandings lie. Be more accurate in our thoughts, logic and derivations. Co-operate on a global scale more. Achieve things never before seen. And maybe, just maybe, we might have higher intellect

@Miguel1 I tend more to relate to your words. @Joshe Do you think attempting to address fear directly is the way though? In my personal experience, attempting to reduce fear or alleviate it does not work. In fact - modern psychology also tends toward this; trying to eliminate fear tends to make it chronic. In fact CBD doesn't 'make anxiety go away,' but tests the belief that fear means danger. You expose yourself with fear present. I have never been able to reduce my fear by attempting to address it directly; I have simply had the courage to act anyway, regardless of the fear. Security never relaxed my fear - for myself - it has been ever-present in one form or another. And simply arises and manifests according to the domains to which I may have some doubt. I allow the fear. I acknowledge it. I breathe in and JUMP, regardless. I challenge this. You can be psychologically stable with profound fear present. You just require courage to act in the face of that fear by radically allowing it. And courage is about permission. Not force. And deep trust. If the above were true - I would have been unable to act to save one of my close family members when faced with grave danger. I was 'psychologically stable' in that I was able to act with conviction and clarity. My grounding did not collapse under pressure. I was filled with fear and still had the courage to act. And assisting in the situation necessitated putting myself in direct danger - increasing fear. I simply do not think reducing fear is the issue; the real issue is the beliefs unexamined in operation behind the scenes. In the shadows.

Driving around at midnight unable to rest, the white line markings of the road slicing through the landscape in sloping lines... https://youtu.be/InFbBlpDTfQ?si=UsHHgsfYBao1G8O1

I was quietly going to point this out to OP 😈 The slapping of labels onto things to 'assist in learning about the self', or 'defining the self' is actually the conformist 'temple' attitude; OP would never ever know about these terms, or feel the need to label oneself, if they had not learned about this though some external frame. And that external frame in this sense is an idealogy not inherent to themselves 🤣

Your sexuality and how you express yourself is totally private; you never need to justify what you like to anyone. Let alone family. If you do not fit in the confines of the box others want to put you in, it will cause them to be perturbed. But recognise that is how they choose to react. You did not cause that reaction. Just don't talk about it. There are many things people in my life do not approve of about me. I just don't talk about it. I do not hold it against them. I let it be. Might be helpful to ask yourself 'is there ever a reason to disclose sexual preferences?' particularly around family. For me? No.

What else are you going to do with your time but use it? It might be interesting to ask yourself; would you rather waste time in bed, scrolling etc? Or waste time at some sort of goal? At least the time spend MIGHT lead to something. The thing I worry about with your mindset is; you are going to face hard shit no matter what. Be it work, health (physical or mental), wealth, people sick or dying around you. Disability... I might be assuming, but you sound young and unchallenged. Life is going to come for you. Quickly. And if you don't take it by the balls with work and applying yourself it's going to crush those nuts, making your feel like a victim. Like you are a ball stuck in the pinball machine getting fucked up by the paddles, without realising you are the paddles. I think the most important takeaway from your OP is that working at a passion doesn't feel like work. It is about perception. Toiling at something we hate stretches time out into agony. Injecting yourself full force into passion feels like no effort at all. This is what it is like for me when I am painting; time stops. But my GOD is there a lot of work and effort involved in art. It is just, I do not perceive it that way. Not like how I perceive my construction job to be work, regardless of how much I have mastered it. This points to something powerful; it is not the actual hard work issue - it is a perception issue. It is how you are feeling about it. Not the thing itself. How we feel about things changes all the time. I mean - thank fuck right? We want feelings, perceptions and emotions to be transient states. When I think on the last few threads you have created around this topic - I go back to the thought 'this user hasn't found their passion yet, their drive. Their reason to wake up' (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠❤

https://youtu.be/uCheMBE8hq0?si=qs4aPV-xbMFABg3s

@Lord Kadaver sometimes true love, and expressing love, can be asserting boundaries. It is simply that when we aren't mature, have trauma, or attachment issues, this version of love is misunderstood. But it is a higher, more selfless love. Just like a parent who must discipline a child to protect them from harm; the child doesn't see this as love. It is not received like this from the child's perspective - it seems uncaring, what of the child's needs? But from the parents perspective; they are protecting and helping to grow the child. Ensuring safety while the child lacks the wisdom needed to thrive in the world. They love their child, and will protect them at all costs - even if that means they have to have hard words that the adult dislikes doing. It might feel bad within yourself to cut off your ex - but it is a loving act for both of you. So you can cleanly close the door and work on healing. It might not be what either wants, but that doesn't mean it isn't for the best. An act of love - but not fairytale love. Real love that entails sacrifice, maturity and surrender. If you were healed and able to have a friendship with this women, I can tell you from experience, none of these feelings of confusion would come up. Instead, you would feel a kind, warm regard and welcome an old friend. My experience, my experience 🙏❤️

I think Leo has expressed a very detailed and conscientious reply. The only thing I may add to aid in overthinking; imagine a child as they grow. They learn to roll. Then crawl. Then walk. The child has no room for overthinking, or thinking about the walking. It just does it. And repeats until muscles are built, reflexes honed. The process happens through trying and repetition. No need to analyse with the thinking mind disconnected from the event - only jumping into experience and reflecting through that. In a way you are almost rehabilitating yourself to life. You will need patience and grace for yourself. It sounds like you have been through a great emotional upheaval - you have my heart and well wishes ❤️🙏

It will never be forgotten... 'Because I can' conformity mindset of the rich

(⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)⁠♡

@Breathe really hard to say, because I wasn't using it for spiritual reasons - just bonding and experimenting. I had it in small crystal greyish form and via caps. So a full cap would be typical for me. I would never have found it useful for consciousness work. Not that sort of substance imo. I had visuals from it also - which I don't think is common. I recall going to see Daft Punk on it. During Aerodynamic got caught on a giant checker board I couldn't get out of. Then I saw gold zippers all over reality and as I unzipped them layers of vision were torn down to reveal new scenes. I recall that being the most intense MDMA trip, but I took a lot. It was tested as pure also (I never take anything I haven't tested with drug kits). I enjoy the 'slide out' part of the come up (if that makes sense) but I hate the surging waves prior to the backside/breaking on the shore. The come up feels too much, then I am gliding on a boogieboard of love, rinse repeat. Had to use a metaphor because I don't know how else to describe it. Had the most fun on it with partners. But yeah, the malaise I felt for a couple of months after mean I wouldn't do it again 😊

YMMV because everyone reacts differently; I experience a day or so of afterglow. I normally focus on sleep following MDMA. Small super nutrient dense meals without persuing the 'full' feeling people chase (which is not the currect way to eat anyway). Sleep recovery is higher with small meals. The 2 months following MDMA use feel depressed and malaise-like. Slight fog in the mind. I find it quite neurotoxic so I do not touch it any more. Using another substance on a comedown would overload my system I think. I am glad you came out alright 😊 I personally do not recommend MDMA.

Brah no one saying you can't 🤪 Just that it's silly

I share this sentiment also.