mandyjw

Law of Attraction points to the experience of your "reality" being far stranger than you think. It goes beyond ideas of legit or not. It's more "true" than most things we consider true though. It deals with the truth we create for ourselves and shows us how to create it consciously. The law of attraction is about having greater awareness and focus, and recognizing that the core of every desire is the desire to feel better. This becomes your focus, over believing your thoughts blindly and continually noticing that you are now where you want to be. It is the basis for change. It is the realization that when we feel amazing, we notice amazing things, and good things and thoughts come to us. When we drop resistance and stop noticing what is thoughts we've never had can come in. An insight is a just a thought you've never had before. Law of attraction would teach you that this approach might be off, if you focus on your blockages and limiting beliefs thinking you need to get rid of them before you are free to create your life, your focus on your limitations is actually holding them in place. Making intentions or rather, allowing your desires, is what bring the blocks into light and is the power and momentum you need to blow through them. Awareness over your thoughts of control reveals your true power. "Purer" is a thought that limits and gets into judgement and good and bad and what other people thing territory. The better feeling your ideas the faster you will attract them into your experience. This is how you and only you measure the purity of them. It's beyond choice and not choice. Allowing desires is also like surrendering them. When you really, really know what you want, there's' no choice at all. For example if I offer you the choice between your favorite desert and your least favorite food, you'd say "it's no choice". It IS but you're just VERY clear about what you want. The awareness that the law of attraction "teaches" makes you very clear about you want in the same way, it's a choice but also at the same time it's not because you're so clear about it. If you're interested in learning more check out Abraham Hicks, she is AMAZING. It's also amazing to see how this all fits in with all this other consciousness work stuff, meditation and nonduality, etc. Not to mention the bliss and happiness, forgiveness, understanding and abundance of new possibility, creativity and ideas that floods in.

psykhē "mind" (see psyche) + dēloun "make visible, reveal" (from dēlos "visible, clear," from PIE root *dyeu- "to shine"). https://www.etymonline.com/word/psychedelic

@NoSelfSelf Not sure what you mean, it was not satisfying at the time but the whole thing worked out for the best for everyone involved, strangely enough. Anyway, good and bad is very relative and just a fleeting appearance at that. Sometimes we equate bad with freedom and good with security, but they're not at odds at all really.

It means no contact, no speaking with, etc.

They are from one perspective, but that's not the one I mean. Instead of going on the basis of what we already think and believe is true and our framework, we instead are becoming aware of our thoughts. Now you've heard "be aware of your thoughts" 1000 times before probably, but a simple way to state it is that we are now paying attention to how our thoughts feel. We are more interested in how the thoughts feel than the thoughts itself. In a way we are now disregarding our thoughts, like we've been taught to do in meditation, but at the same time, we're giving them more clear attention than we have ever given them before. So since we've determined that we want to feel better, (and this is basically the core reason for every want we've ever had), now we see why we are wise to give more weight to feeling than thought. We know where we're going now, and we are using how we feel in the present moment as our guidance system. This is living in the now, flying by the seat of one's pants. In order to do this we have to throw out a whole bunch of previous beliefs that told us we were right to feel bad about certain subjects because they were true. Instead of feeling bad and powerlessness to change it, and at the mercy of the world outside, and a whole bunch of other possible reactions that we have practiced or avoided in the past, we instead get very, honestly curious about the thoughts that seem to coincide with suffering. A lot of the time these thoughts are very unclear. The funny thing about doing this is that you learn to pull yourself out of suffering by using both the tactic of dropping thought, learning to see through thought and knowing the difference in feeling between disbelieving and believing a thought that feels bad, and focusing thought. Learning to focus thought means to be conscious that your objective is to feel better, even if you have to leave or disregard for now the current subject of thinking to do it. The mind doesn't like to do this unless it's clear about what it really wants, the feeling better thing. This clarity fades during suffering, almost like as if we're really, really drunk and trying to find the bathroom. A great cheat (you can't cheat) is to journal and just write down what you're thinking and feeling. Just putting thoughts in a linear manner outside your head focuses, and you can make it work faster and better by bringing in a sense of curiosity and humor if and when you're able. Curiosity and humor is the ultimate "detachment", that is also full of feeling and awareness. You'd think that someone could have just taught us when we were 4 or something that it's so simple, if a thought feels bad that means you're holding a belief or perspective about it that isn't true. Like for real, how fucking brilliant and simple and clear cut, and Loving, would feeling as a guidance system be??? That's really how things are. It's really that Unbelievably good. But believing thought and beliefs over the guidance of feeling is the matrix we're afraid to live and die in. But wait! Fear feels bad. Actually wait, hold on, that's not always true, which is why I have to listen to feeling in the moment rather than give power to the mind to judge. Downhill skiing a challenging trail is thrilling, exciting and scary. It makes me feel present in an intense way. Maybe that's what my life is, something that I'm figuring out on the way, not sure of all the twists and turns yet, something that has never ever been done, something that is pushing all the boundaries in the universe, and the fear is just here to remind me how very Alive and present I really am. I'll keep that kind of fear, but maybe trash the kind that feels bad when it comes up.

This feels bad to think, because it's so not true. You are so much more than that.

@Someone here Chasing a temporary high is what people do when they don't understand themselves, they often do it out of fear of missing out or feeling bad. It's not that it works, or doesn't work. It's that it's irrelevant. It's important to see that feeling better and judging myself from some illusory outside perspective as being happy or feeling better is not actually feeling better at all. The actual direct experience of feeling ITSELF will automatically take you "there". This is the Grace of God, Wonder of Wonders, I don't know how else to describe it. So in practical terms, meditate with the intent to drop resistance rather than accomplish or find something, or just do what you're feeling like doing, or choosing a better feeling thought or perspective, or choose to love rather than judge, whatever it is in the moment, you as Infinite Intelligence will know. You will know by how you feel what really feels better to you. Feeling and Awareness merge when you stop cutting yourself off from what you really are with thoughts that feel bad to think. They feel bad because they aren't True, they aren't how you really Feel.

@Someone here We attribute a cause to happiness. Happiness is just the end of a desire or the absence of fear, tension, or holding yourself apart from something. You cannot remember happiness itself, but you can remember the objects and circumstances around during the time that you felt it, so you attribute those objects, circumstances, etc as its cause. Because it's what you really are, and because it's actually complete absence you mistake happiness for what you believe is you and so you see it as temporary, fragile, the same as you see "you" or your body. That's why dropping the belief in you, or seeing the mirage in the mirror is key. You cannot do anything to get happiness, but you can see what you are not, and you can see what happiness is not. Of course, you dropped your idea of you as meaningful, keep discarding, that sense of relief, grows and grows. Emptiness is Fullness. That Fullness is beyond all ideas of happiness. But you can have your positive ideas of happiness too, you can have your cake and eat it too. Just not the ones that hold you apart from happiness and create suffering. The ones that you tell yourself are about happiness but really are about fearing its absence. You cannot fear its absence because the essence of what you seek in seeking happiness is absence itself. You don't know what other people do. Every thought of judgment you have of stupid things other people do in order to feel better is only holding feeling better apart from yourself. Instead just be really fucking honest with yourself about what YOU want. You want to feel better.

Long story, his parents were very conservative Christian, had extremely strict and ridiculous rules and at the time we got together in highschool my big thing at the time was writing in everyone's yearbook "follow your heart" and I seduced him into following his heart a little too much and there were some major clashes.

I like to play the role of the corrupting force, so always good boys. I managed to get my husband shunned by his family for a year.

No, it is you, YOU are the "it" you think might choose to chase money and sex. When I graduated highschool I decided to take a risk and start a business. Almost all my friends went to college and I often felt like a loser living with my parents doing something that might not work. It took a lot of practice to learn the skills I needed and since it was something obscure, I had to be self taught expect for advice on online message boards like this one. I remember a turning point a couple years after a lot of perseverance and some embarrassing setbacks where I realized that it WAS going to work, that I was doing what I loved and it felt amazing. This kind of happiness just flooded me. I had done it. I also remember this horrible feeling, almost immediate reaction where my mind went to the first and worst thing it could think of to ruin it. If you believe you are physical, you must abide by the laws of physics. Every action (that you believe you made) has an equal and opposite reaction. Because if you believe that you can be happy, you believe that you are a thing that can be something, happy or unhappy, alive or dead. Duality, starts with I and the opposite side of the coin hangs over us as long as we believe ourselves to be responsible. As you ruthlessly go for your dreams and what you think will make you happy, all the blocks you have will pop up. You are the only ultimate block. What you really are, is the complete lack of resistance to what is, which is exactly the same as causeless happiness.

@Someone here You said it was like chasing a mirage.

The point is, I can't explain myself. I'm a miracle.

It was only because of Rupert Spira's English accent saying "Mirror, Mirage" accent that I got the link between the words mirage and mirror. Told my husband this and he was like, yup, like the Spanish word "mirar" to look, to see. Look in the mirror. What you think you perceive is not actual. The reflection in your mind of yourself is not actual. A thought of yourself is not actual. The mirage is seen as a mirage and no longer believed as actual. Mirage doesn't go away. Nothing changes but everything changes. It's a miracle.

If it can appear within consciousness, you can say it has a beginning. If it can disappear within consciousness, you can say it has an end. For things that have beginnings and ends to appear and disappear they must appear and disappear within something that has no beginning or end. That something is what you really are.

Search youtube for yoga and stretches for lower back pain. It takes a while to find the right stretches that work for you. The problem may be in your hips. Sometimes just strengthening your abs can solve the problem. Be patient and open-minded because this part takes a lot of research and experimenting. Also if you're doing high impact exercise, check into stuff like your shoes, or changing how you exercise. If you sit a long time in a chair, consider getting a better one or maybe a standing desk. Stuff like that can make a big difference.

@Forestluv

Your true nature isn't separate from you, so the fear of you doing that, is actually you trying to do just that. Funny, right? Your true nature is not a thought.

Jim Newman makes all these dismissing statements so patiently, (or not sometimes, which is even funnier), and then every now and then he drops some huge new insight or refers to something so deep, you're like "what just happened?". When people focus on one teacher (or a few similar teachers), they often are tempted to turn the teaching into dogma and criticize and reject other different teachings. Naturally this seems to happen with simpler teachings more because they are so clear cut. So even though they are simple and direct the opportunity for us to complicate and misconstrue them ourselves is bigger. Fun. I get the hero's journey confused with Don Quixote sometimes.

What is it that's aware of the self doubts? If you are not an object why are you still thinking of yourself as one, and one that has to "get" that it's not an object. Funny, right? That's all you are outside of your direct Awareness right now. A thought. I highly recommend Rupert Spira, his videos are very good, but I especially love his books. Read them little by little, let them really sink in. He explains the subject/object Awareness thing so clearly. It also helps to make the connection that this is what performers are doing when they are in a flow state, doing something they really love with no one trying to look back and judge it. They are pure flow, no thought of themselves. So go for the things that scare you a little bit but also light you up, practice that flow state in whatever way you're drawn to. It's like downhill skiing down a challenging hill, all thoughts of self doubt and images of crashing have to go in order to focus on the exact maneuver and adjustment that needs to be done in the moment. It's automatic. This way of becoming present by dropping the self referential doubts sort of takes over your life, even when you're doing something much more mundane.

@Forestluv I don't assume that I can know, rate, measure, compare or have the ability to properly categorize or label anyone's experience or trauma. Especially since I can't do it for myself. The way I look at things depends entirely on my own connection with me in the moment. I can and do tell the same story in a multitude of ways. This isn't about telling a story of dismissing trauma. It's about realizing that you're always creating your story new here and now, that it can go in any direction you want it to, but only if you're willing to overlook what you already know to be true.

Of course, you do often go through stages of blame and anger and blaming others, it's ok, but don't get stuck there. When your conscious intention is to feel better, you're much less likely to get stuck. But if you're truly not caring about other's judgement then you don't let what you perceive as "toxic positivity" get you down either. YOU and only YOU know by how you feel at any given moment. No one gets to decide what empowerment is for you. If something others find empowering is disempowering for you then don't do it. Don't shame other women (or minorities, or, etc) who do. If something is empowering for you do it, don't let others shame you and make you feel it's actually disempowering when it's not. If anger feels better than feeling powerless, be angry. If anger feels worse than hope, feel hope.

@Preety_India What do you actually want? Do you want to feel better and feel empowered? Or do you want to continue to feel ignored, insignificant and unappreciated? The power is yours. And trust me, all the other stuff you want to see actually happen in society, the equality, all of it, will happen all the same. Faster even. But why do you want those things, this real change and validation in the first place? Only because you want to feel better and feel empowered. There's only now honey. It's yours. It's your birthright. It's who you REALLY are. Take it.

Ironically it speeds things up and things start flying loose. They get dealt with but only when you're ready. This is how you become ready. Call it "faith" if you like.

Ok, so yeah, it's insensitive wording, but since you don't have male authority figure trauma, and you're the one I'm speaking with here, you'll forgive me, right? I have the power to believe my thoughts and the power to choose a thought that feels better or is more empowering. Total empowerment is also total surrender. It hurts to keep thinking about a subject that limits me. It feels amazing to own my own expansion and think creatively, in ways I've never thought before. My dad used to get drunk and verbally abuse me, and try to control the most ridiculous aspects of my life. We have an amazing relationship now. That would not be possible if I kept on thinking "my dad is an alcoholic and I've suffered A LOT for it." Have I forgotten? No. Have I learned not to make myself a target for it by carefully choosing my focus? Yes. Do I think it was my fault that it happened at the time when I did not know this? No. There's a difference between avoiding, blocking out and choosing a better perspective that enables healing. If your identity becomes that of someone who has a broken leg, when the cast comes off, you'll feel as if you've lost something, even though in reality, you've gained your freedom. Yes, I can decrease production of insulin in its pancreas, and "I" can discover a way to treat it. Of course. If you tell me not to do something, you just planted the thought in my mind AND the desire to do it. It's pink elephants up the yin-yang. What I CAN do, with my astonishing amazing, inherent power of Love and Awareness that I am, is pick a thought that feels better. On a completely different subject, or I can start feeling amazing and come back to this subject that currently feels crappy to think about and see it in a whole new light. And that is how trauma is released. You realize that everything you're arguing here for is to maintain identification with body, and essentially the maintenance of your own psychological suffering. You've got scientific reasons. Brains. You've got gender reasons, "I'm a man and you're a woman, woo hoo, how exciting, all the problems we'll cause each other!" You've got color of your skin issues, "Goddamnit, there's a brown crayon for black skin, but not an appropriate color for white skin in the 16 color box, I totally just thought of this, but I'm pretty sure my self esteem issues stemmed from this when I was a child, I think someone did that on PURPOSE, and I'm WRITING AN ANGRY LETTER TO CRAYOLA RIGHT FUCKING NOW." I really don't mean to belittle or ignore racism, but the truth is, when it happens you often don't actually know what someone's intentions or reasoning is. If you're willing and open-minded to investigate far enough, you realize either A. it was unintentional or B. It was born out of the person's own suffering and past abuse or their ignorance, which is none other than the fact that they never had the gift of someone to teach them better. If we're too quick to jump on the racism or sexism or whateverism blame bandwagon, we actually really, really hurt the very real cause we're fighting for. This isn't about ignoring the problem. This is about clarifying and having the focus to implement the most effective way to address it. You've got, "other people are suffering and I care about them, ie empathy" reasons. In your direct experience, you are thinking a thought of them suffering (your own thought) and suffering for them. You cannot get sick enough or suffer enough for someone to make them well. Why not think of them as well? Question, do you actually enjoy the direct experience of love and loving people as they are, or do you prefer to think of yourself as an empathetic person? If you believe that you're a body, you are susceptible to all kinds of judgments, pretty ugly, strong weak, young old, dead, alive. It's a lose lose situation. The thing I don't get is how we so readily separate the "enlightenment" perspective from the "science and politics and REAL WORLD OUT THERE" perspective. You don't actually get to do that. This is really fucking radical. There's no real problem of gaslighting or avoiding or forgetting. That's all just excuses to continue identifying. Take the plunge. Nothing is lost, no one is dismissed, no one is left behind. Everything to discover.