mandyjw

Your love of truth is known by the love that is felt. True love feels good... like love. All other feeling is love too, but if it feels bad, it isn't True. The sense I Am is love prior to the sense I am a body, a separate individual. This is what is meant by survival. Survival is not a problem, just go beyond, prior to the I am that needs to survive to the sense I AM, being... meditation, awareness aware of itself, love itself collapses in perfectly unity prior to thought of separation. .

@somegirl More often than not it's alcohol, drugs or mental illness.

@somegirl Good. ❤

You have a very high level of self awareness and insight into the hypocritical nature of thought. A thought exists within duality, and it basically has to ignore or forget itself to exist. This pertains to any thought. "The chair is brown" infers that the chair is not white, orange, gray, etc. The light that makes a "brown" chair possible is colorless and formless itself. To be a color you must absorb all other colors and reject the one you appear as. No light, no specific color. So in a way, all appearance is quite... hypocritical you could say. Basically you are seeing one aspect of the nature of thought very clearly, but still misunderstanding the nature of thought and self. That's why you're experiencing such conflict around it and why it feels bad. What you are not seeing is that you are not to blame and not responsible for it because the thought "I" is another thought that excludes itself and isn't true. This is the root thought to question. This goes really deep, even though it's a very obvious truth, it's SO obvious, (it's so apparent it is prior to appearance itself) that the appearance of our thoughts cover over it. This video/visual might bring you some insight into how we seek to use thought to escape, how we create and try to escape to other negative emotions in our judgement of anger and blame as being wrong.

Evidence is only good for convictions. Convicted! Convinced! Holy shit. Not your fault.

Right now, self care, get your mind off it. Do something fun and relaxing. Make decisions about pepper spray later when you're feeling better. Also realize fully, in no way was it your fault. It's not your fault you're a woman. It's not your fault you're attractive. It's not your fault you didn't do anything differently. Not. Your. Fault. I know you realize this intellectually, but, sometimes we still find a way to fault ourselves. Not. Your. Fault. Go do something fun.

It's so evident, you miss it in your insistence on having evidence. Try it. Live like it's true. Honestly, earnestly. Then come back and tell me I'm wrong.

Meditate hardcore? Motivation? You got your understanding of ego turned inside out. What you think is egoic, highest joy, etc, is authentic, is already here now and what you think is the way to it is actually what's holding you apart from it. Meditation can bring this to light. We are sneaky enough to use the idea of a method to what we are, to color over the fact that we already... Are.

Are your thoughts true? Love, feeling... is not thinking. Suffering is thinking saying it knows what feeling is and it's very bad. Satan doesn't think, you think for Satan to hold in place the possibility that there's a monster under the bed and that's why you're suffering. Get up, turn on the light, look under the bed. That's what actually feeling, and disregarding thoughts is, it's looking under the bed. There is no boogeyman, no monster under the bed, no Satan, no devil, unless you imagine it, and that makes him you.

Feeling is guidance just as pain is, if a food makes your stomach hurt, you stop eating it. If touching hot iron burns, don't touch it. Emotional suffering is the same. It tells you when you are entertaining a thought or perspective that is not true, that is of separation. It is guidance out of love, leading you to love. It is true, it's not your fault.

My spiritual journey really took off when I became a mother. There's no quitting that. Enlightenment is the recognition of the conditionless. That's why having a fear that the conditions aren't right for it feels so off. Life has a way of working out for us perfectly, even when it doesn't make much sense and doesn't seem that way in the moment.

Once you get REALLY evolved, I recommend these two. Nondual and direct AF.

Why would you try to define God? It'd be like trying to murder every single butterfly in the world, just to put them on your walls.

It's not that this IS a God, and it's not that there's NOT a God. Either of those scenarios would be horribly disappointing. It's not that.

??? Except for the distracted from getting your life together part. You can have everything you want, one great thing just adds to another great thing. Just switch focus when it gets too consuming. No girl wants you to have nothing to do but get a girl and no practical business will be any fun or fresh ideas behind it if you don't have some sort of muse in your life. Women are great with that, and we love nothing more than to provide that.

@Vzdoh I suggest this to everyone having any sort of issue in a relationship, it seems stupid but it's shocking what comes about when you really do it. Make a list of things you can do for your own pleasure. Ideas are listening to old favorite songs you haven't heard in forever, starting something fun and crazy like pole dancing, bellydancing (but doesn't have to be sex or attraction oriented at all), reading an old comic strip you used to love, chocolate, a walk down a strange road just to look at pretty houses, walk on the beach, anything like that. Write down everything that comes to mind, that feels inspiring and then then try your best to do three a day. Once you practice taking care of yourself in this way, it's shocking how our perception of our partners change and so their perception of us does as well. If you want him to be open to having kids with you later on, (whether you do want them or not, you probably want the option open) encouraging him to heal the relationship with his son and mother would be the way to his being open with you. Of course since you cannot heal something for someone else, this might mean owning your own desires and being secure in yourself to allow and even want this for him. If that sounds like too much, ignore it for now and just focus on feeling great yourself. You want greater pleasure and ease for him, and if you allow and cultivate the same in your own life, not just during sex but all the time, it will reflect and expand into all of your lives. It sounds like an indirect way to solve the problem, but it's not. Everything is about sex, except sex.

@Vzdoh How do you feel about kids?

I mean... all anyone's communications here with you leave you scratching your beard and looking up as if you're deeply pondering something.

@Someone here Do whatever you want and are inspired to do, devoutly, passionately. If I sit down and paint a landscape on canvas it's the same thing as an inspired prayer from the heart. I might be imagining it, but what difference does that make?

End? The Nature of Consciousness is awesome but for someone new I'd always recommend The Power of Now, that book has some kind of magic, man, I dunno. Maybe I'm biased cause that's where I started. I found that after reading and applying those lessons I gained the interest to be able to read stuff like The Nature of Consciousness and I Am That, etc. Years before I got into Eckhart Tolle my first introduction was the movie What the Bleep Do We Know? Then I found Leo and Marie Forleo about the same time and a short time after that consumed just about everything Eckhart Tolle ever made. There are quite a few bridge people out there in self development and business, ones I came across personally were Leo, Marie Forleo, Tim Ferriss, even Seth Godin. A lot of people get tricked into realizing there's no them when they try to make themselves into the best them they can be. Eventually you realize the concept you is the limiting factor, and what you want shifts to wanting what you got.

It's like the Walmart brand of clothing, "no boundaries". Nobody has any actual boundaries, so there are auras. I also like the socks that say "no nonsense". Pointers be everywhere.

It's so slow. When you think you know what's going on, you're always way behind. Watch how fast everything happens...how it is. So fast, it doesn't. Mind is like people talking during a movie about the movie. If you try to process it and figure it all out while it's going on you only get more lost. Oh. Is that what I'm doing? Maybe the movie is about people talking about a movie while the movie is going on. Oh right. Can't fuck it up.

I keep falling on this slippery slope of knowing that I know that I don't know. I mean this honestly, but I also laugh. As soon as I write out what I'm feeling, it becomes hilarious. And enough to make me cry. Childlike not knowing is honestly not knowing. There isn't any doubt in it or sense of knowledge that has to be lost or unlearned, unwound, let go of. You don't know what you don't know. Can you have your cake and eat it too? Can you have the wisdom of experience and also pure innocence? Of course. Another stunner from Nissargadatta I read this morning, in my own words, you think that Stonehenge was there before you, but you had to be there prior to it for it to even be. I've noticed lately how when I feel threatened or inadequate (really hard to explain exactly, but those words sort of fit) I'll reach for something, like if it's in meditation and I believe a thought, I'll move or shift, and if it's something I read or reacted to on the forum, I'll go to check something or reach for something to eat. I also think the major mistake would be to judge this as bad, and say I have to stay. I'm reaching for feeling better, but I'm not seeing that what triggered me didn't make me feel bad, that I misinterpreted something somehow. I'm not a dog sitting still waiting for a treat at the end of his sentence. I'm not a kid in the famous marshmallow experiment who can be judged as having good self control or bad. I don't need to fucking stay. I don't need two fuckin marshmallows for being good. I can't leave even if I do. This is the real staying. There' ain't no fuckin heaven and even if there was I wouldn't want to go there anyway, cause it wouldn't be any better than this.

You can't fix someone else's hang up, if you're hung up on his hang up it will only make it worse. Focus on your own own pleasure, not just during sex. It rubs off. No puns intended.

Driver Ed teacher when I was 15, Old, overweight, retired cop wheezing all the time. "Make a left here." I make a right. He slams on the brake. "DO YOU NOT KNOW YOUR LEFT FROM YOUR RIGHT?!" Me, ten steps ahead of him in doubting myself and always completely willing to admit to my total idiocy. "No, not really." He just didn't know what to do with that.