mandyjw

It goes far beyond a flesh guru or psychedelics. There are many, many strange ways in which life can teach you, or rather, in which you can appear as an external teacher or tool of some kind to yourself. Understanding calls for radical open-mindedness.

That one is courtesy of my own inner child.

Ok, but just so you know toast is easier to ship if you get bored of Jesus and want to sell him on eBay later.

@Nahm Sneaky or brilliant? Jesus will be whatever you need or want him to be, love or hate him, then when you change you're mind he'll change too. Much like the self.

Rebellion and devotion are ultimately, the same thing.

Before we had a global market, people's diets varied widely all over the world depending on what food they had available in their region. Not everything you see is edible but everything can be a spiritual experience if you use it with the right intention.

From the gospel of Judas. http://www.nytimes.com/packages/pdf/national/judastxt.pdf "When Jesus observed their lack of [understanding, he said] to them, “Why has this agitation led you to anger? Your god who is within you and […] [35] have provoked you to anger [within] your souls. [Let] any one of you who is [strong enough] among human beings bring out the perfect human and stand before my face.” They all said, “We have the strength.” But their spirits did not dare to stand before [him], except for Judas Iscariot. He was able to stand before him, but he could not look him in the eyes, and he turned his face away. Judas [said] to him, “I know who you are and where you have come from. You are from the immortal realm" Do you believe in angels, do you believe in aliens? Do you believe we create our reality? Do you believe in one consciousness?

@Truth Addict Good luck with the last exams!

@tsuki Thank you, that explains a lot. I sometimes wish that you could be fully appreciated for what you are, but I guess maybe that would ruin it. "Once upon a time people who knew the Way were subtle, spiritual, mysterious, penetrating, unfathomable. Since they’re inexplicable I can only say what they seemed like: Cautious, oh yes, as if wading through a winter river. Alert, as if afraid of the neighbors. Polite and quiet, like houseguests. Elusive, like melting ice. Blank, like uncut wood. Empty, like valleys. Mysterious, oh yes, they were like troubled water." "True leaders are hardly known to their followers. Next after them are the leaders the people know and admire; after them, those they fear; after them, those they despise. To give no trust is to get no trust."

@Matt8800 Huh, I thought the point of psychedelics and mystical experiences were to dissolve the duality between real and unreal. I'm not sure what the purpose is then, what is it?

I agree, but isn't it so ironic that we take psychedelics to experience things that aren't real so that we can learn that reality is an illusion of our own creation but then we come back from those experiences and tell other people that if they haven't had those experiences through direct experience that they don't know what we know? Or rather don't know? Is this not a great example of mental masturbation or the snake eating it's own tail? Couldn't I say the same thing to you psychedelic users about my own natural awakening? I mean that would be pretty fucking brutal and exclusive if I chose to do that, you can't go back in time and not take them, where as I can do psychedelics any time I want and join your club. Let's just not have clubs. My experience and your experience is an illusion, a memory, we are shared consciousness and nothing more. Let's forget the differences, methods and past and see our similarities. Growth is ultimately an illusion. It's an illusion that requires things and other people around you to be standing still in order to see. You can appreciate your growth and at the same time see its illusory nature.

What growth and who is the one measuring and attaining that growth? That's the question that when asked, things really seem to fall apart. This work is a building of oneself up to break One's self down.

What OTHER people? That's the illusion we're all trying to dissolve. Everyone's opinion is essentially going to be flawed by their own limited experience. This is Leo's forum. Leo has chosen to enthusiastically embrace the path of psychedelics for a prolonged time. He has stated that no opinions outside of those who have experience with psychedelics are useful and he also often points out the sentiment that those who decide not to use them are essentially wasting their life. This is separation, cutting off others and essentially cutting off oneself. We need some to explore psychedelics and others to reject them. Why? Because that is what is happening. The real work is reconciling with each other and understanding each other as the One that is our real nature. Telling people not to share opinions if they don't have experience with something is a red flag, a distraction from real understanding. The more of that kind of separation I see around something the more I know that something needs to be healed.

This is something that I'm trying to figure out myself so I hope my perspective makes sense here. I had a recent awakening and I have never taken any drugs. A big part of my practice right now is letting go of the mystical experiences I had and not missing them or holding them as an ideal. It doesn't matter how you get to have mystical experiences, spontaneously, through psychedelics, or whatever method, those experiences are all meant to be let go of. It's not right to look at other people's paths and pick them apart or project where we are and what we are dealing with onto someone else. But at the same time that's how we going about understanding the world and other people. When I see other people continuously using pyschedelics rather than using them and letting go of them, I feel afraid and concerned for myself that I won't be successful in letting the memory/desire for my own mystical experiences go. It feels like being stuck in the in between. I just want to see us all either transcend it or settle into it, whichever is meant to be.

So I created all those synchronicities to draw you in, in a way? The whole thing was self deception, like all of creation? I sometimes really desire to go back to those mystical experiences. But it was all just deception, all just something to let go of. The insights seemed so earth shattering but in hindsight they weren't. Why is Leo continuing to take psychedelics? Would psychedelics continue to help moving along the "path" from here? Or are they a clinging to the mystical experiences, deceiving oneself that they are going deeper and deeper when really they aren't. Or are both possibilities simultaneously true? The thing about my own life that I feel now is a real sense of purposelessness. I guess I'm OK with it, sometimes. I don't know what I'm doing here anymore. I've let go of my future visions, or as much as I'm able. It just feels kinda blah. If I had psychedelics and the freedom to do them I would to move beyond this. But isn't THIS the point. The path. The THIS?

I don't let myself express the opposite feelings of self importance but I definitely have them. I don't want you and others to see them, I'd rather appear humble. I am neither. It's a pendulum swinging from one side to the other. I feel like my task now is trying to stop the pendulum from swinging, and it's like during my awakening someone took it and swing it as hard as they could and it's finally starting to slow down to where it can be worked with again. You saw in my first journal plenty of my self-aggrandizing tendencies, don't you remember?

And what's your LOC?

How can I be that advanced spiritually and still be so self-centered?

Those are hard to answer because it's difficult to separate my concepts from the experience. My experience is ever changing for all those questions and so are my concepts about them when I think of them. I am consciousness, I both am and am not simultaneously. The world is a perception, the world both is and is not simultaneously. I feel as if there is a here and a there but I never get "there" and I also know that in some way I create there as I perceive there. Knowledge is thought, a one dimensional language, the only real purpose of which is to communicate. Communication with one's self or other makes no difference and one's self and other is an illusion. The other definition of Knowledge is a thoughtless state and complete understanding of oneness. God is the oneness of everything that both is and is not and when we are cut off from God as a separate self he appears as a higher power. When we are not cut off from God we know ourselves to be God.

@tsuki An incomplete perspective, admittedly. What's my LOC? None of the descriptions fit.

My concern is that 1000 is from one perspective complete and utter bullshit and a lot of ideas that all need to be let go of. Sometimes I wonder if it's better to learn things so you can let go of them or if one should avoid having them to begin with.

@tsuki Woooow. I'm not sure if I should make myself finish 1000 first or read Meditations on the Tarot.

I am conflicted about this topic because I had a natural awakening, which isn't something I would ever wish upon my younger self. However people's lives and maturity levels are so different so who am I to say who is ready for an experience and who isn't? I think that the best we can do is teach people how to be keenly aware of their inner guidance system, which meditation and a still mind encourages. Even with a natural awakening, it's really difficult to not miss those samadhi states of being and you've returned to daily life. It's really difficult not to want to think about them, figure our what and how it happened and not to talk about it constantly. Even though I wasn't able to sleep through the night and the whole process with really disruptive to my day to day life, it's pretty damn hard to forget. With psychedelics those experiences can be revisited whenever one wants. When you miss the magic of day to day life because you're missing a memory of an experience, or if you think there is a future insight waiting that will unlock the world for you, you've missed the entire purpose and magic of being. Is that why we are all so isolated? We're all pretenders?

I believe that the brain does produce DMT. Scientists seem very confused and ignorant about the pineal gland in general. https://beckleyfoundation.org/2017/07/05/do-our-brains-produce-dmt-and-if-so-why/

I was not good at working as part of a group or under someone else's authority, it was such a strong preference that I didn't even want to go to college because I was so frustrated with teachers and a classroom setting. I really wanted to study on my own. I started my own business and it was successful. But now I'm older, and I want to be more involved with people and my community, I want to volunteer for different organizations but I need to learn basic skills on how to work with people. It takes certain skills to work independently and other skills to work with people. A well rounded person has both and your success will always be limited if you don't know how to work as part of a group.