mandyjw

Oh no you didn't.

That's probably because search lead them to your video and they were expecting a Christian point of view. Christians think yoga is evil, my aunt even loaned us this DVD to try to save us which made me want to hurl. https://www.amazon.com/PraiseMoves-Christian-Alternative-Laurette-Willis/dp/0736915842 I completely dismissed their fears during my rational atheist stage but also had absolutely no idea about the power of yoga and meditation or even just... whatever understanding or transformation was happening. Christians are 100% right because if you truly, truly believe and imagine that God is real and the Devil is real all your life but God must be accepted in and the Devil must be kept out, guess who you end up inviting in when you open doors you were told not to open? Ah, the power of imagination.

Everything Christians warn against happening is meditation is right, in a way. The problem is the wanted/unwanted filter and the assumption that someone has the choice or power to want to avoid... something. As soon as you say "Don't look behind that door, or don't eat from the tree," it's already done. By no one.

Did you get back in it again?

The direct path is the one of least resistance, so fun, whimsy, love, entertainment and frivolity suddenly become indispensable to enlightenment. in dispensable. ha. ha ha. HA.

"Anyone that says there's no price to this whole enlightenment thing, just joy and bliss, don't be quick to buy that." BUY, Adyashanti, don't buy the thing with no price? Did someone sneeze on the free cheese samples or something? I love the variety of spiritual teachings one can say to you and not be wrong, as you navigate these tantalizingly deceptive mystic mists of the psyche. When I was a kid, my parents took me to this cave park and I got lost in a cave and I figured no one knew I was lost or cared, so it never occurred to me that the guide speaking overhead was a park guide who was actually giving me instructions on how to get out. Had to find the way on my own. Huh, this post got too journaly and personal so I decided not to reply to the thread and post here. Then I accidentally posted there. What evs I guess, everyone here knows I'm crazy anyway.

"Anyone that says there's no price to this whole enlightenment thing, just joy and bliss, don't be quick to buy that." BUY, Adyashanti, don't buy the thing with no price? Did someone sneeze on the free cheese samples or something? I love the variety of spiritual teachings one can say to you and not be wrong, as you navigate these tantalizingly deceptive mystic mists of the psyche. When I was a kid, my parents took me to this cave park and I got lost in a cave and I figured no one knew I was lost or cared, so it never occurred to me that the guide speaking overhead was a park guide who was actually giving me instructions on how to get out. Had to find the way on my own.

By how it feels, do you enjoy the process and the learning itself or just the accolades? Doing what you love is taking the path of least resistance. Doing what you're good at is taking the path of least resistance. The two are not at odds, so they usually go hand in hand, even though this seems to be too good to be true, it makes sense. When there is resistance it could mean you're doing the wrong thing for the wrong reasons or it could mean you have the wrong mindset, or some sort of misunderstanding about it.

@beastcookie It doesn't though. If you want the wisdom, intuition and spiritual connection of the crone, you gotta stop being so disgusted by her and equating her with death.

Mirror, mirror on actualized.org, tell me who is the... ehmm... Nevermind. Question is flawed. Goddamn mirror has a zit on it. I put some acne cream on it but the zit keeps moving. I'll get it eventually though, even if I have to cover the whole goddamn mirror in it.

Can't stop what you never started.

I sadly do not have time for journaling myself into rabbit holes today but am becoming aware that the things I've been doing lately have been all about self worth. In fact limitation consciousness (that isn't the right term) is weighing on me now, important orders need to be shipped, house needs to be cleaned, laundry started, kids dropped off, important meeting attended, and really the only part of work I'm excited about it photographing the purple caterpillar project I made yesterday. Who am I to sit and write my thoughts down? How frivolous. As frivolous as purple caterpillars. My joy and my entire livelihood is frivolous. I am frivolous. frivolous- diminutive of *frivos "broken, crumbled," from friare "break, rub away, crumble" Of course frivolity is an integral part of the whole. I've been buying a lot of clothes lately. A lot of my clothes were purchased 10 years ago. Buying clothes puts the fear of God in me. Last night I realized why. It basically hits all the lower chakra issues, (that red one). When I look nice, I often feel awful...ly self conscious. When you grow up in a rural poor area, people who look nice stand out and attract various and certain uncomfortable reactions. There are lots of safety reasons that as a woman you don't want to attract attention to yourself. That message is seriously anti-feminist but oh dear God, is it ever ingrained in my psyche. Money. If I spend money my kids could starve or something and if my kids starve and it's because of my frivolity, oh my God I'll never forgive myself. Basically I am not safe. I am not ok. After I purchase something I worry about it when i go to sleep or wake up in the night. Last night I dreamed that my uncle decided to sell the family property I'm hoping to buy from them to someone else without even telling us. Fear of being feminine, mostly in my experience women spend the most time, money and attention on their clothes and it's more safe for me to judge this as silly and stupid than to admit I really enjoy it too. But what a problem I've created for myself? My business, talents and passion is in what I judge the frivolous, the visual art. Do I judge my customers for valuing my own work enough to buy it? Yes. In fact I really do. You can imagine how that feels. How frivolous, how cutting of oneself off to do that, to not see the exchange as one celebration of beauty, art and exchange of energy and inspired joy. I bought this book, which is soooo crazily counter everything I've ever embraced and imagined myself to be. https://www.amazon.com/Your-Beauty-Mark-Ultimate-Eccentric/dp/0060722711/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=your+beauty+mark&qid=1598959022&sr=8-1 I'm learning oh so many things, some of them practical, some accidental or purposefully spiritual or existential connections. I've been avoiding self care of all kinds and forms, thinking I could bypass it. I have a plantar wart of my foot that has been hurting a lot lately, and I remembered when it first showed up. We had done the house renovation and mortgaged it again to do it. I had to finish all the painting myself and it was grueling, having a one year old, and living in the kitchen and dining room with the entire family for the whole winter. It was the time in my life that I was the least taken care of, the most stressed and yet, completely going for what I wanted. I realized that my biggest problem with my husband is that he doesn't pay attention to appearance or take good care of himself. Then I realized that I never tried to google or address the painful spot on my foot that formed at that time, likely from the over stress toxin load of painting. For 4 years I never bought anything, looked up anything or put anything on it to take care of it, I just suffered through the pain while running on it the whole time. Could life really be for joy, love, appreciation and creative expression? How frivolous.

Yes, yes, yes, yes. LOVE Tim Ferris.

@Stakres "Areas you want to work on", and your milestones sounds way too serious and heavy in my opinion. Lighten it up, make it fun with no end goal or objective. Start small, really small. Look up an old song you love but haven't heard in years, or an old web comic. Buy a treat at the grocery store you wouldn't think to buy for yourself. That sort of thing, get creative and got by the feeling of what really lights you up. What's crazy is watching how the way to the big stuff unravels and becomes clear from the smallest things. What matters is that you follow your heart and follow your bliss. Discounting the little stuff in life is a way we sneakily discount our very selves.

"You can talk!" She gives her voice away to get the man, but the man only loves her for her voice. siren (n.) mid-14c., "sea nymph who by her singing lures sailors to their destruction," from Old French sereine (12c., Modern French sirène) and directly from Latin Siren (Late Latin Sirena), from Greek Seiren ["Odyssey," xii.39 ff.], one of the Seirenes, mythical sisters who enticed sailors to their deaths with their songs, also in Greek "a deceitful woman," perhaps literally "binder, entangler," from seira "cord, rope." Meaning "device that makes a warning sound" (on an ambulance, etc.) first recorded 1879, in reference to steamboats, perhaps from similar use of the French word. Figurative sense of "one who sings sweetly and charms" is recorded from 1580s. The classical descriptions of them were mangled in medieval translations and glosses, resulting in odd notions of what they looked like.

seduce (v.) 1520s, "to persuade a vassal, etc., to desert his allegiance or service," from Latin seducere "lead away, lead astray," from se- "aside, away" (see secret (n.)) + ducere "to lead," from PIE root *deuk- "to lead." Sexual sense, now the prevailing one, is attested from 1550s and apparently was not in Latin.

How much thought have you given these things you want, are you sure that's what you really want? Could you write down some things you want, big things, small things and get some inspiration and direction there?

And there's my answer. Sorry potential journal readers, I won't tell you what the question was. This is my play, I'm always conscious of my audience and I like to break the third wall. However, a lady must always maintain an air of mystery. *snorts, laughing*

Oh... fuck. adorable "Tie a pink ribbon around your puppy's neck and push him around in a stroller, and you'll either get worried stares or compliments on how adorable he looks. Adorable means lovable, sweet, and childlike. The adjective adorable is mostly used to mean "cute," when someone is describing something sweet or charming, like a baby or a pretty dress. The origins of the word adorable are actually religious; it was first used only to mean "worthy of adoration." The Latin word adorare, "to ask in prayer," is the root of adore, which in the 14th century meant "to worship." It wasn't until the 1880s that adorable began to mean "delightful" rather than "worthy of worshiping." https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/adorable

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christopher_Thomas_Knight "Knight was largely reluctant to express any inkling of motives or insights gained through his experience, but he did offer that "solitude bestows an increase in something valuable ... my perception. But ... when I applied my increased perception to myself, I lost my identity. There was no audience, no one to perform for ... To put it romantically, I was completely free." Finkel compared this observation to similar statements by Ralph Waldo Emerson, Charles de Foucauld, and Thomas Merton.[8]" If there's no one to perform for... Side note. I really want to go to a Ball someday, a for real Masquerade. Like all Victorian era gowns, ball room and everything. But if there's no one to perform for, there's no one to perform for. I made that dramatic quick. Did I? Oh but the characters, real, fictional, and no difference between... it's so seductive. artifice noun ar·ti·fice | \ ˈär-tə-fəs \ 1a: clever or artful skill : INGENUITY… believing that characters had to be created from within rather than with artifice.— Garson Kanin b: an ingenious device or expedient 2a: an artful stratagem : TRICK… revising the state's constitution through a series of legal stratagems and artifices …— W. Haywood Burns b: false or insincere behavior social artifice

Distancing our selves can be an attempt to better ourselves, to find our true path in clarity OR to identify. It's important to look closely at your heart and thoughts to know which is which. Ever write something for the benefit of someone else and then realize "oh... fuck... that was for me.) Seems to happen to me on this forum all the time.

The belief that you are susceptible to being dragged down in a level of consciousness of the others, or susceptible to being wrapped up in their stories, is a misunderstanding. Sometimes time alone shows this belief to be false, sometimes spending time with people does. Usually it's a mix between the two and the honest intent to love fully. Metaphysically, a drug dealer is more conscious than my dog, but my dog makes me feel much more conscious. Is that the blame of metaphysics or my own judgmental thoughts and beliefs? We tend to be most triggered by people who are closest to us in terms of development. Someone who is the first generation to pull themselves out of welfare and go get a great job is triggered by their family and more likely to strongly embrace conservative political views, etc. Distancing our selves can be an attempt to better ourselves, to find our true path in clarity OR to identify. It's important to look closely at your heart and thoughts to know which is which.

@Aaron p Awesome, I've had the same experience with journaling and reading. Way more powerful than I ever gave them credit for in the past.

I told my high school English teacher in a journal that I realized that everyone is beautiful and he wrote "Yeah and everyone is ugly too". It kind of pissed me off, but I never forgot it either. "When the world knows beauty as beauty, ugliness arises When it knows good as good, evil arises Thus being and non-being produce each other "- Tao Te Ching