eliasvelez

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Everything posted by eliasvelez

  1. I dont agree with murder and I think what Luigi did is murder! At the same time, dont you think that if you exploid millions of people and probably take some responsibility for a lot of deaths because you put profit over everything that there will not be consequences? I think what is lacking is accountability and too much people in this Capitalist system dont get hold accountable. Even here in Swizerland, the guys who are responsible for the downfall of Credit Suisse and put the System at the edge of a collabse are lecturing in universities, becoming politicans or opening consulting firms. So if you dont understand his motives, I do and I even sympathise with them. Im fcking sick of a system where predators of Society dont get held accountable and are getting the easy way out.
  2. The therapy that is transforming my life is Somatic Experience. Its relatively new. It was particularly used for shock trauma but I figured and use it for developmental trauma. I think most peiple would profit from knowing Somatic Experience. I dont even go that often to therapy but what is the most transforming(in my case because I have developmental trauma) is the integration and practice that you do in everydaylife. The navigation and soft self regulation. Im talking about the tools you learn while in therapy. But also the therapy of course is very powerful. I really resonate with this practice because its not about indulging in ideas and toughts about the past or future but it works with what is here now, what are the symptoms of the trauma and how are they the key for the healing?
  3. I must say I didnt read the whole text but with trauma I know that Somatic Experience is one of the best therapys out there. Mabey you can take a look on it and if it speaks to you see if there is an therapist near you that practices that. (In somatic experience you learn tools for self regulation but there is no way that you can heal your trauma alone!)
  4. How about sitting next to her in the next date? At a bench, in the park in the grass. And what I do when im not shure is I just ask: „I feel like holding your hand, is that okay?“ „I feel the urge to put my head on your shoulder, how do you feel about that?“ or I come closer, shoulder to shoulder and ask her if it is okay or I tell her how it is for me in this moment „I feel a bit shy being so close to you…how is it for you?“ Sincire and withlout excusing myself. I ask myself, what do I want? And then, how do I own my actions and lead to that ? Either by owning it and doing it or bey just communicating it. Open communication is such an Icebreaker. I got appeoached once by a girl while walking home because of some shirt I was wearing, we talked, after like 1 hour we where cuddleing at some park bench and after 2 hours she invited my to her appartement. Btw one of the best tips I got on kissing is: when you are at a date, and you feel like if she would initiate a kiss and it would feel right and good for you. Than just do it. Make it the right moment. Say it, that you feel like kissing her or just initiate it. But be sensitive, you will feel when she does not want it, relax abd mabey later…. And when you „try“ flirtinf, that is the moemnt you are not doing it. Be present, courious, show yourself, hoe you are and express what is real now for you. Flirting happens then, when you are real and in connection
  5. Hey my tip for the next time. When you „try“ to get somewhere, you will fuck up the date. Just be. Dont try to get somewhere, to have a deeper connection, to build tension , be funny or whatever. Be geniue and honest. Be honest with your insecurities. Tell her in the moment when you are nervous. When you have nothing to say and feel to nervous. Pause, breath and be okay with 30 sec of silence. Be just present with her. If you feel like kissing, say that. If you want to touch her but are unshure, ask her… dont „try“… BE… if something „happens“ cool… if not… also cool because you had a genuie interaction… it is not about what you do, it is about what you embody
  6. Yes its true. Its that people get more consiouss. I see it in my social circle and also in the younger people from the scene.. and also in me. Alcohol free beer, only staying until 11:00 pm… in my city the clubs and night venues are really struggeling. It doesnt mean that people dont go oute anymore. But the activities just change
  7. For me, it is the contrary. With the right people I had in dates and in friendships and contexts like specifivc meditative authetnic relating practises experiences of truth and deep connection, even some slightly higher states of consciousness. For example, in the last date I had, I was committed to truth and being me, real, naked. It was so intimate and honest that after 3 hours in the end, the girl said it felt like a speed run of a whole relationship. Or I had en experience with someone where where I dug deeper and deeper in my fears where I had the revelation that I have an excistencial guilt of being born into existence, that was for both of us a very psychedelic experience because it was so honest and raw. I think relationships and experience of connections can be a support for a deeper integration of truth in life and also a support, if done very consciously. But of course, there are probably limits at some point where if you want to go deeper it is not supporting anymore but there is a lot of potential.
  8. Im from switzerland but would say am very connectet to europe. My father is Italian and I have friends in austria, italy, germany, denmark, protugal, tschech republic and have travelled a lot around europe in different contexts the last years. Hoenstly, I feel so fucking optimistic and hopefull about the future of europe. It seems that europe is slowly integrating stage green, with some backlashes but the eu seems strong enought to survive them and learn from them. We, europe, have the best educated, the healthiest society, the best wealth distribution in the world plus europe is preparing for the future in terms of interconnection, military, sustainability and business. I must admit, I have been most of the parts in urban centers but It still feels like there is so much at stake that in the end the majority of the people dont want to give up on europe. At the moment it feels that for the next years the ship „europe“ is on the right course…
  9. It was btw a 19 year old syrian who stopped the mentally ill woman until police came… https://www.stern.de/panorama/hamburg--wer-die-messer-taeterin-am-hamburger-hauptbahnhof-stoppte-35754570.html
  10. @kray ⚠️ why are you spreading misinformation? It was not a terrorist attack and had to do nothing with religion! It was a german woman who was very likely psychically ill and was in treatement
  11. @Someone here My man, you seem to falling into I trap that I fell into. You are not over the thing, and neither is your empathy sincere. Im very interested in politics and I had a “phase”when I would watch all the events that happened trought the lense of spiral dynamics and have the attitute of “you know, suffering is part o life, and it makes all sense in the end so it's okay and just part of life🤷‍♂️"...It makes it easy because you emotionally detach from the situation.... but that's a very immature perspective because you didn't integrate empathy and humanness into it. You pretend that you are some kind of Stoic entity (which you are not) Not because you are a bad person but because the feelings of the tension of the complexity of the issue, the powerlessness, the pain is way too much to handle, so we close our heart. So next time maybe see how it is to just be with that feeling of complexity, pain, powerlessness without trying to escape this feelings
  12. It's my first project of that kind and am a bit proud, so I want to share it haha. I don't have much experience in dancing, expect from just dancing for fun and contact improvisation.
  13. Hello, at the moment I'm doing an education for facilitating circling. I'm doing this education because I want to deepen my circling practice. Circling is a practice which combines authentic relating with meditation and with psychotherapy. Very powerful, my relationships are deepening since I'm doing regular circling and I experienced depths in human connection that feel psychedelic and just show me more and more what is actually possible in connection and how deep, nurishing and joyfull real connection is. Im also doing regular contact improvisations jams, which is an experimentative dance form. I'm also thinking about switching job (at the moment I'm working hourly in a supermarket) that is more aligned with my values. I'm also exploring nonduality at the moment and system thinking. Ah and almost forgot to say that but im starting an education in somatic experience in the end of the year. It seems that my future seems to be heading in the direction of being something like a therapist. Im 23 and kinda lost a bit because I see so much possibilities and I'm not sure what to do. I love exploring human connection and it's so nourishing but im not sure how to integrate that into my "life purpose", should I do YT videos (I am trying it but am not sure yet if i want to go that route)? should I focus on exploring and deepening stuff in this area and trust that with time it will resolve itself? I did a long time of theater but it doesn't catches my attention anymore and I'm really drawn to contact improv dance and Im asking myself if I should explore more the world of performance. Im going regular to meditation retreats and also see potential in the direction of focusing more on consciousness exploration and making a life purpose out of that. At the moment im drawn mostly drawn to exploring connection but outside of authentic relating spaces I don't see so much possibilities to explore that besides a bunch of good friends. I have a big urge to have it figuret out and having the possibility to explore this more and even tought about moving to a bigger city for more possibilities(i live at the moment at a 180-220.000 city). I'm just worried that the potential that is clearly there doesnt get used in a fullfiling way for me. I just feel limited and am asking myself if Im in the right direction and should just trust the process, if I should be more concrete, if I should be more diciplined and do more stuff and be more proactive...i kinda feel a bit anxious and I can imagine that an perspective from outside could be fruitful. I am exploring my potential but it feels that there is more and I'm not sure how to tap into the fullest and because of that there are a lot of days when I just do nothing, not reading, not educating myself, consuming and just being lazy. I want to do something with this stuff but dont really know what
  14. Would this translate also to other domains? For example doing videos or performance?
  15. Be geniue. You dont need to „try“ being confident, not to nice, cool, whatever… you just are genuie, honest and real.
  16. I think you didnt understand my question. I think this idea of interfering and trying to control someone elses adult decisions just seems comical. I know only someone in my social circle where the parents try to interfere with their dating decitions and it just creates so much suffering and is such a clumsy way to try controlling reality haha. Its like life is this komplex and delicate thing and you try to manipulate it with heavy tools that make more harm than good. What if you dont like the dude/girl but your daughter is deeply in love? Do you really think it is that simple haha. What do you do if you daughter just does what she wants even if you dont like it? And btw if you raise your kid in a healthy way you wouldnt need to worry about this stuff. Btw, would you do the same if you had a son? If no, why not?
  17. What if she ignores your „say“ haha. What are you gonna do?
  18. Hey my dad is not nessecarely a conservative but he also has limited and closemindet perspectives. It was very difficult for me the since I was a kid because my father comes very fast to his emotional limits and its very rare that I feel I have a connection with him that is not superfical. The last years I tried to build a deeper connection but it just hurt me. I now realize that my father has this limits for a reason and its not personal. My approach would be that you accept the limits of your father, dont take it personal and meet him at this level. If you wish or expect that he behaves different than who he is, you just will be disappointed(For example with my father. He rarely gives recognition for something im proud of and very fast turns it and makes it about himeself. Ist like I want to tell him about somethin, after 2 minutes of beginning, he interuptes and makes it the next 20 min about himeself… as an example). I now just dont expect much intimacy or connection with him and enjoy our superfishal connections and if I dont want to talk with him I just leave and since then I feel more love for him because everyone has his/her limits, and his are just very fast found. Like with a pet. You know that a pet has limits. you would be forever frustrated with that pet if you expect it to talk… but when you accept the pet with its limits(that it cannot talk) you love the pet how he is.
  19. Yes I was thinking the same. For me it seems that Leos advices and views of dating comes from a stage orange(and lower) lense. While there ofc seems to be some some truth to what Leo says I think dating can also be approached from a more present and consiouss perspective that integrates the survival aspects (but is not limited to that) but also the aspects where realness and connection also play an important role. (I also experimented with pickup and my Insight was that there are more conscious approaches to dating. Of course if you only want to get a lot if laid, then yes, pickup is for you but there seem to be more sustainable and ways with more Integrity to approach dating)
  20. Easy. Honestly, everywhere you are and no matter if its about dating or making friends. Just be present and do what you anyways would do. If you feel attached to the person or worry about that you could make a mistake, its okay, but dont take it to seriously and dont involve with that or try to push it away. Be just normal yourself, you dont need to proof someting to no one. From there you will see if you two vibe, if not, its okay, have the standards for yourself that you only want closer contact to people whit the same wavelength because thats the only thing that is sustainable… if yes and you two have a good vibe, great, just ask her if she would like to do something togheter sometime or suggest something. Thats it, relax.. most importantly enjoy yourself..really! Dont overcomplicate it.
  21. Posts like this show me how much different the american bubble is than the european. Almost nobody in Europe would say something like this because it doesnt is that easy.
  22. 2 Main Lessons -I deserve unconditional Selflove. There is not one aspect of me, not one thing I could do that would make me undeserving of Selflove and selfacceptance. -It is not about being confident or charismatic. It is about being real. I am learning to own and embrace my current experience instead of clinging to ideas how I should be and trying to manipulate reality to move in the direction of these Ideas.