Karmadhi

I have noticed that a lot of people tend to say stuff like "women like personality more than looks" and "just be confident and fun" and stuff like that. I think there is a lot of truth to that, however this leaves me with a question. Why are men these days in Western countries so insecure about their appearance and not their behavior/personality. If it was a fact that women like personality more than looks then would not it make more sense that guys who cannot get girls would feel insecure about not being confident enough or charismatic enough? Why the most insecurities in men stem from their appearance and sometimes lack of money/good jobs. Why does society in general promote the idea of the good looking guy getting girls instead of the confident charistmatic guy? If you do not pass an exam, the common answer you would get from society is simple, study more. If you cannot get girls why the common answer people give is regarding stuff like "the girl does not like your looks" and shit like that. Why most men suffer from physical insecurities a lot more than personality insecurities. I am not saying that all insecurities are about appearnace but most of them are. "If only i was good looking" is heard more often than "if i was more confident and charming". Why?

This has been going on for a long time now. We started from tribes, to city states, to small states, to bigger countries and now some bigger organisations are created like the EU for example. It will take a long time though for a global government, centuries in my opinion. Not happening anytime soon. Just uniting Europe which is one of the most developed regions in the world has proved to be extremly difficult and messy process. Globalization is arguably the biggest thing that will speed this process up. @Leo Gura I have noticed a lot of people are against this idea of a global government even educated people from developed countries. They fear it will ruin diversity and different cultures and some also fear that the new global government will give too much power to a select few people (those that will govern it). Personally i think a global government might have some cons but also has a lot of pros in it. Just the amount of energy and issues created by wars, political tensions, trade wars, etc is huge and this is removed by a global government. Also (might be wrong about this), but global government will hopefully eliminate or greatly reduce the issues of racism and discrimination. The idea of the concept of country being dissolved is scary for like 95 percent of the world population and therefore that is why i think it will take centuries for the global government to become a thing.

Many possible reasons. Some of them are: 1. Sex and love are human needs 2. A man's worth in society is closely related with how successful he is with females. 3. When the rest of your life is handlded well, the few things which are not will become of major importance. Your mind is always looking for the next thing to "check from the needs box" 4. Some people do not have enough friends and need someone to spend time with 5. Lack of self love and self acceptance 6. Lack of ability to be happy alone 7. Lack of experience with girls and hence a huge desire to try it since it will be something new for you I hope these clear it up for you.

Not true at all! That is a bullshit steriotype people have which is incorrect. 50 percent of relationships these days are formed through online dating, which is literally half. Most guys use them to find a girlfriend not neccessarily to get laid. You can use same logic in real life, the guy just wants to fuck and dump you. Online dating is not any less relationship driven then real life dating is. Maybe it used to be 10 years ago but these days, especially with COVID it has become the main source of meeting partners, even more than actual real life interactions. I would say the chance of some Chad approaching you in a bar and trying to seduce you is equally high than with a Chad in Tinder regarding "pump and dump" possibility. I know plenty of guy friends that used Tinder for example to find a partner that really wanted someone, not just for casual sex. https://qz.com/1546677/around-40-of-us-couples-now-first-meet-online/#:~:text=Some 39% of heterosexual couples,same-sex couples that year. Would not be suprised if with COVID this reached 50 percent (2017 study). I used to also believe girls in online dating were of lower quality and sluts however i was just being retarted. When like 75 percent of the whole population uses online dating then you will basically run into the same people you would run in real life, be it good or bad. It is no longer a small specific portion of the population, it is literally the entire population. If a guy wants to find a girlfriend, both high and low quality guy, he will first use online dating since it is more conveninent and simple rather than going out and shit. So the access of good guys is not any lower than what you would find in bars and clubs. I can even say guys in bars and clubs are lower quality since there is quite a high percentage of players and stuff like that which obviously is not good partner material.

1. If they talk too much about themselves and are not geniounly interested about you- BIG PROBLEM 2. If they brag too much and are not humble- BIG PROBLEM 3. If they do not do the small gentleman stuff like opening door, paying for you (cultural so depends where), suggest to walk you home (if that could be a thing) etc -Problem 4. If they look at other females like waiter etc- Problem 5. You can ask them about a specific thing you said, so come back at it in a way to see if they were paying attention or not to what you were saying. 6. If they act overly dominant or assertive- Can be a problem. Confidence yes, overly domininant no. 7. You can tease him a bit and see the reaction, if person gets too butthurt or takes it way too seriously- Can be a problem unless it is a hurtful comment like commenting on their appearance, income etc. 8. You can test their intellectual capability or knowledge by doing a bit of deep conversations, not too much but just a bit to get a feel if the person would be compatible about that stuff. Hope it helps, im not expert but i am very good at reading people from a few meetings and get a good feel for their personality.

I think another reason on top of what others said, is that males tend to be more rational and pragmatic then females. They have a bigger bias for pure logic, quantification and rationalization then females which use intuition more. Logic can create barriers on practicing spirituality. Another reason which i think is huge is that usually males tend to be more achiever focused. This is partially from evolution and partially due to gender roles where the man is supposed to provide tangible results, that is their definition of success. A male that earns an average income but is very spiritual would not be considered as successful by mainstream society. Spirituality is anything but tangible. It is not just spirituality that is dominated by females and gay men, the zodiac is another thing that is super popular with females and gay men. I remember once a guy friend told me: "An easy way to tell if a guy is gay is to see if he follows the Zodiac and shit like that".

Just use common sense guys, be assertive but not violent. It is not rocket science.

@mivafofa The thing is that guys believe that girls actually want to fuck them but will pretend like they do not want to so they wont look like a slut or easy. That is why guys are taught to push for sex until they get a hard NO. Honestly if a guy did not push for sex at all his success rate would decrease dramatically. If a girl says like hmmm i dont know, maybe im not feeling ready etc that to me is not a hard no. A hard is no is exactly what it implies. NO!!!

@mivafofa Well there is a fine line between "hard to fuck" and "rape". As a guy you have to be a hard closer otherwise you will miss a lot of girls. Even Leo advises it, however there is a big difference between rape and pushing for sex. Often girls have these anti slut shields which you can break and then have sex with her. Rape in my book is if the girl gives you a super hard NO. You do not need to be a genious to tell if a girl wants to fuck you and is playing hard to fuck or legit does not want to and proceding would be basically raping her. I think a lot of these cases happen because either people are drunk or the guy is a complete moron.

This is the standard females should have regarding awareness of what they like. This kind of stuff should have views. One of the few females i have seen both online and in real life that ACTUALLY understands this shit. Very honest and objective. The first blind spot is arguably the biggest one. A must watch for you ladies on this forumn and arguably guys too.

@mivafofa How can male friends rape you? Those are not friends. Unless you are both super drunk and the girl has been leading you on then there is no way that can happen. Screen your friends better, guys that would do that to a female friends are pieces of shit.

@Preety_India Sick shit, that is pure sadism not even sociopath.

@Preety_India :'((((( I do not understand why men rape, if they are so sexually frustrated then get a hooker or something. Maybe they like the idea of having power over someone? Society should try to eliminate the rape problem, it is really a pain in the ass for most females.

Is rape common where you women live?

@Emerald Exactly, i dont know why Leo and other people here advocate it. Sure it can work but is it worth the hassle and hatred you get from it? Plus it does not show real confidence or authenticity which apparently is what matters the most

@Hulia Yes that is what i think too. That is why i never considered it as a positive thing unless the girl is being a bitch and you stand up for yourself. You can be confident and charismatic and cool and fun without being cocky.

The fact that the top 10 richest people in the world hold more wealth than like the poorest 40 percent of humanity is mind boggling and disgusting honestly. It would be nice if the UN did some sort of taxation for ultra rich people where all that money they have would be better distributed. Considering how corrupt the world is, i do not see it happening in the next few decades at least. Hopefully some day...

Any movie/tv show examples? Would be easier to visualize.

@Leo Gura Yes i agree, if you are shy and never talk about yourself it is very good training. I was saying in normal conditions not if you are training.

@Leo Gura I am saying it from personal life experiences not from thinking about it. Nobody likes narcissistic people except other narcisistic people, the kind of people i enjoy spending time with hate narcissism and love and respect humbleness. I am not talking about girls especially here, people in general. Talking about yourself is a good way to keep the ball rolling but i think it should be balanced, too much of it can create issues. For some people i think it works good because of their personality type, if you are very loud and expressive and stuff and have cool stories it can work RSD Tyler videos style but that is super not my and many people's style. Todd V would be a better example in my opinion.

@Leo Gura I thought people find those that only talk about themselves obnoxious and annoying. Often i hear people complain about this person only talking about themselves and it annoys them and lowers their desire to be around such people. I often hear the advice that people do not give a shit about your stuf, they just want to talk about themselves so if you talk about yourself it will not work. Exception would be some over the top crazy story. "Just ask questions, women love to talk about themselves", is an advice i often heard which contraditcs the "talk about yourself" advice. Is there a balance between the two or the first is bullshit?

@Windappreciator Agreed

I wrote this small essay after some conteplation. The nature of evil always fascinated me and after going through Leo's work and a few other teachers and my own contemplation on the matter this is what i came up with. Would like to hear your guys opinions and thoughts. Limited identity- The true cause of evil. Identity is what we associate ourselves with at a deep almost existential level. It is what we have concern for and what we care about. Our sense of morality, of what is right and wrong is directly associated with what we identify with. Whenever something that is harmed within our sense of identity, we consider it immoral. Whenever something that is harmed outside of our sense of identity in service to something we consider as part of identity we do not consider it immoral. There are different degrees of identity which are expansive. Here are they listed from least to most inclusive. Note, that this should be taken with a grain of salt. 1. Identifying with a specific part of yourself, not your whole 2. Identifying with yourself as a whole. 3. Identifying with your close family. 4. Identifying with your large family. 5. Identifying with your city. 6. Identifying with your country. 7. Identifying with your region 8. Identifying with your ethnicity. 9. Identifying with your continent. 10. Identifying with your race and religion. 11. Identifying with your species. 12. Identifying with all living things in your planet. 13. Identifying with all living things throughout the universe. 14. Identifying with creation itself, in all shapes forms and sizes. Now, as you might see humanity in the 21set century has done quite some progress in expanding its sense of identification. However, much work needs to be done. Why does this identification stuff matter you might ask? For a very simple reason. Everything that we define as “evil” is an act made out of love within a specific identification level in expense to something else outside this identification level. I will now dissect this into simpler and easier to understand language. Let us take the example of a person in Germany. This person identified himself with a specific race, called the Aryan race. In his mind, the Aryan race was the primary thing that he cared about and what mattered the most was the best for this race. Then you have another group called Jews. This person did not identify himself with Jews and therefore in a twisted, deluded version of love tried to exterminate this group because he thought their eradication would benefit the Aryan race. This act of love based on limited identity is considered as one of the worst tragedies that has ever happened in human history, and the person in hand is considered one of the evilest persons in history. Everything he did was out of love however. Interesting, isn’t it? Let us give some more simple examples to clarify it even further. The atomic bombings of Japan- An act of love made to save American lives on expense of another country’s lives. The crusades- An act of love made to help a religion on expense of another religion. The great purge- An act of love made to solidify and maintain person power in expense of other people. As we can see, every tragedy that has happened in history was nothing more than a twisted, limited, self- biased version of love based on limited identity. If we want to eradicate what we consider as “evil”, our only solution is to expand people’s identity. I have friends who are against the European Union idea and when I ask them why, their response is simple. “I do not want to pay for other country’s issues”. Fair enough, well what about your city paying for another city’s issues on the same country? “That is the same country, that is different”. Well, this is also the same continent, why complain about this? “Continent and country are different”. This circular logical, without a clear explanation is nothing more than limited identity not being able to be properly articulated. If we use the “they are different” logic to justify a limited identity, as in the above example then we would shrink to the point where we only care about ourselves. I mean we are different from our family members, why care about them? See, how idiotic this logic is. Just because something is different does not mean you should not care about it and not identify yourself with it. We are all different parts of creation in the end.

@Zigzag Idiot Thank you for your response and material

@Windappreciator Animals no but eating living being is. At least with the technology we have currently. In an existential level there is no difference between a tree, animal nor plant i think. All of those are distinctions made by us. That is why i said identifying with all living being or even with all creation as the highest levels of identification. The higher the identification level is, the more it hinders your survival.