Breakingthewall

Break yourself into a thousand pieces so the sun can pass through you, says Rumi. Where is the sun in your enlightenment?

@emil1234 for me the thing with psychedelic was like that: At first, it was emotional, etc., but at a certain point, with 5 meo, it was: absolute emptiness. Reality is a mirage, and beneath it there is emptiness. Infinite, it opens absolutely, and there is nothing. Or, if you prefer, there is an awareness of emptiness. It was absolutely horrible; I felt like committing suicide. Reality was dead; it didn't really exist; it was just dead emptiness. Absolutely depressing. So I had to take psychedelics again and again because I sensed that this horrible shit couldn't be everything. But every time it was the same, dozens of times. It was something so sad and so nihilistic that it squeezed your heart and froze it. It doesn't matter if you are eternal consciousness; the essence of reality is nothing, so reality is nothing. It's dead. At one point, on a trip, I realized that I was looking outside; I was an observer observing the exterior. There was nothing there. Then i changed the focus, then stopped looking, became one with nothingness, and in that same instant, nothingness opened up. It was everything. Absolute, unlimited, alive with infinite lives, shining like infinite stars, an absolute cry of joy emerging from the depths of the abyss of the limitless. Absolute freedom, absolute life, total glory. Loneliness? That idea doesn't exist. You are total, much more than any dream, impossible to think, unlimited. Then the point was reaching that openenss without 5 meo, little by little, difficult, a lot of barriers. That's why I talk so much about it like I'm an obsessive ,because it's essential, anything else is a trap

Imo real meditation is in great part facing the fear itself. Not fear to something, but fear, all human have a lot inside, it's like a main energetic barrier that builds the human psyche. It's unconscious, see it requires look inside , open yourself totally. For example, 5 meo is scary right? You talked about it in another post. For me was absolutely terrifying, a real fear

The only exit that I see is here and now. opening yourself to what reality is and placing direct perception first and preference second. Not eliminating it, but not letting it reign. The only way is openness; the other possibility is religion, and it never brings real satisfaction.

For me there are a lot of uncociouss fears. Death, absolute loneliness, many others. They make us move, without emotions we would be totally still, that's why the mystics said: be still to reach the truth, but better trying to hack the system without having to become a vegetable. There will be time when we are dead.

It seems to be the dynamic of power. Power is a possibility, so there's a niche, a gap. That gap is going be filled. It demands cruelty, ruthlessness, and an absolute focus on power, since the competition is total, so absolutely cruel beings emerge to fill that gap. There are not limits, seems that this is the dynamic of life, when something is possible, happens.

I'm not creating the dreams, they happen due some quadrillions of neural interconnections that happens due some quadrillions of relations with the whole of reality that comes from the infinite chain of cause effect or the totality . I'm floating in the flow of the reality, same than you, and every breath that happens is an effect of the whole and a cause of the whole. And it's absolutely impossible by definition knowing whats going to happen next, because it's infinite

My choice is the only choice that's not madness, the real openess. First forget absolutely all the ideas. Second, direct and deep observation of myself in meditation and psychedelics, third, staring my fear and my attachment without any decorations, 4, stare directly to death and the absolute nihilism of the reality, the absolute void of everything, as long as I can. Intuit that there is something else to see. And finally, let my structure get open, see the absolute that everything is, my real nature, the absolute depth. Then perceive it's reality, it's flow, everywhere, be one with it and enjoy life realizing the beauty and the joy of existing

If you assume ideas that have not a real foundation you are stuck. Your mental structure must be open to see, and those ideas are a limit. If you prefer keep those barriers, it's your choice, but at the end are a jail

First time I did 5 meo I was trapped in the fact of existing without scape, was absolutely horrible feeling. Then everytime I did psychedelic I had that realization until I opened it. . Consciousness is the fact of being aware of. It's not something definite but a reality. For conciousness to exist a perceptor and something perceived are needed. You could say that they collapse and only conciousness remains, but it's not true because without change there is not conciousness. Imagine the no change. You can't imagine it because everything is change. Conciousness is the perception of change, then you could deduct that there is something deeper, the nature of the change, what change is made of. Without change there is not subjective reality, no conciousness. a gap until change happens and conciousness restart, then no gap, just change You could say: in deep meditation there is not change. There are infinite micro changes that are building the experience of deep meditation You could say it's made of consciousness, as is the wisdom of Advaita-based spirituality, but this doesn't make sense. It's a misconception, like saying that without awareness of change, there is no change. The explanation would be: If you're not conscious, where is the change? A somewhat forced explanation. It's like saying: If you've never been others, others don't exist; only your field of consciousness exists. These are categorical statements based on absolutely forced premises. They close. The final realization is the absolute nature of reality, and it's not conciousness because conciousness is relative to change. It's not a "nature", it's a reality that arises due the change. A splitting of reality into two planes observing itself Someone could say: thats a materialist conception, reality is conciousness, you are not awake. That are the only arguments that can be said, and imo are too weak

I can't know that I'm creating this experience as god as you said, but is a lion appears, I know that I ve a extremely strong feeling that we call fear, it's a reality that happens . Then I can work in that energetic reality, see what it is, go deep in its nature. but Im not going to think that im god and that because it's just something that anyone said

Not everything is a projection, when I perceive fear In me it's not a projection, it's a reality, a energetic structure. That fear closes.

Then there is duality between reality and illusion. Do you know where this comes from? From the meditative Buddhist tradition. According to it, you have to force the mind to stop, since its movement is an error; it's falsehood. Silence, on the other hand, is truth. This way, you reach a silent state in which you repress the psyche and, with it, suffering. This is normally supported by the idea of reincarnation. Whoever cuts off their mind in this way usually does so in search of a better future, even if they won't admit it, even to themselves: better reincarnation or nirvana (I'm not saying that it's your case). Given the obvious duality of stillness and movement, it is affirmed that movement doesn't exist, and thus the problem is solved. But movement exist. Calling it illusion is meaningless imo

If it's any help, I've had that kind of experience hundreds of times with psychedelics; it's still limited. I hope this doesn't offend you. I'm not dismissing your experience. This is your first experience of profound dissolution. It's almost impossible for it to be total. There is identification with consciousness and a sense of center, of being alone. There is still a subtle remnant of the self. The total dissolution of the self opens the experience and reveals its nature; it is the absolute. There is no loneliness, no dream, nothing. It is absolute, total. All of this here: consciousness, your mother, the universe, and infinite forms. Only as potential. You are not the consciousness of potential, you are the totality, the limitlessness. Think about it. If reality is consciousness, why does consciousness "dream"? Then it's not just consciousness, it's a dreamer. The total rupture of the self-structure reveals the total. keeps breaking until there is no consciousness, no loneliness, nothing left, only the absolute.

It isn't if you really perceive your fear. There's an energetic barrier of enormous force that separates the bad from the good. It's innate. I once took LSD, and at one point, I began to think about something I'd read: Congolese guerrillas forced 8-year-old children to torture their mothers, then kill them and eat their breasts, turning them into murderous psychopaths and slaves. I couldn't escape those images, from the child's perspective, then the mother's, then the guerrilla's, for hours. Then I began to see concentric circles of moaning impaled bodies around an enormous mountain of corpses. I saw all the human pain, the cruelty, the human fragility. It was impossible to escape, and impossible to accept. I was subject to it, but I couldn't accept it. At one point, after many hours, I accepted it, and everything exploded like a soap bubble, and reality completely equalized. It was an act of the heart, an energetic movement. It's not real, not like accepting that you are going to be tortured tomorrow, it's a inner acceptation of what is "bad" in your deep programming. That's meditation, not silence the mind but perceive your energy. It's much more deeper than concept vs silence, it's inside, written in your genes The point is not really accept being tortured, it's perceiving your energetic barriers that take the form of thoughts, preference, fear. See them directly and dissolve it that moment, it's like a game, that's meditation. Your thoughts are an expression of your energetic structure, that structure closes. It's possible to see it and change it. Of course, if tomorrow I'm going to be tortured, I'm going to get absolutely closed and on panic, I just can open those barriers in meditation, they are absolutely real, impossible to break absolutely but you can dissolve them a while

That's a duality between enlightenment and form. A denial of a facet of reality as false in opposition to another as true

How do you know that? It's just a possibility that you assume as true, a belief

It's a symbolic act of surrender. It's like taking a psychedelic trip and releasing a trauma. It's an energetic thing that happens. It's not literal; it's the temporary dissolution of the barrier between what you desire and what you fear. It's deep meditation. You don't literally say those words, but rather you surrender to whatever it is. You open your heart to the "bad" and stop differentiating it from the "good."

Maybe it works for you to get total openess to your nature, maybe for another works dancing salsa. What I mean is , stillness and that is not essentially different than action, could be necessary in some point to change your energetic structure, but it's not enlightenment itself

Of course, and that opinion is the key that closes. Look, you read Acim and don't realize you're choosing the good and rejecting the bad? If you want enlightenment, you have to make a difficult move. You have to say with absolute sincerity: Give me pain, give me torture, give me children impaled in front of their mothers. Break my heart and shatter it. I open myself to it. I take the cup and drink its contents to the bottom without hesitation. I surrender myself to crucifixion, to total pain, to total loneliness, to total humiliation, to indescribable torture. But of course, some seconds later I think: no no, please, wtf?? I was joking, no way, I don't want that shit. But you have to accept it in your heart at least for a moment, to be one with the whole. If not you are always two. You don't need to do this move all time, just once, but absolutely true. It's an energetic movement. From an unlimited perspective it's the same being a king or a dwarf selling by his mother to be tortured in a circus of psychopaths. Both are, that's everything. It's difficult to see from the human perspective.

I understand you and I'm going to give you a diagnosis (I'm so smartass that I irritate myself) In that sentence, you've said it all, and your limitations are exposed. Don't take this as an attack; read on. Perhaps there's something revealing here. When you say that absolute being/consciousness is dreaming reality, you are operating from a limited perspective. You perceive the reality of form as a hologram, a mirage, that "consciousness" dreams. something without substance. For you, enlightenment is the perception that this consciousness is permanent. This undoubtedly implies that you haven't opened yourself to the essence of reality. Form is not a dream; it is the inevitable expression of totality, and any form contains totality in the same way that it is contained within it. Truly, any form is totality. Conciousness is just an expression, a possibility that happens , the reality is beyond conciousness and unconsciousness. Absolute reality is a bottomless, boundaryless abyss that is conscious because consciousness arises within it, since its potential has no limitation. But what is is not consciousness. The reality of form is not a tranquil dream of consciousness at play, but the inevitable expression of total depth, a manifest potential that contains totality in its absolute plenitude. The Buddhist perception of form as illusion is a closed perception. It is purely mental, but without the essential openness, which is that of the "heart" in quotation marks, signifying the real substance of reality, its unlimited vitality, its total power. Look, everything that exists as form unfolds in infinite forms; this is absolute life, total glory. Nothing is illusory; everything is real, because the depth of everything is absolute. The depth of a thought encompasses all of reality. Illusion or mirage implies flatness, and that implies limitation. The unlimited lives, and its life is total, because it has no limits.

Then a cat is enlightened?

Could be, I just listened a bit of Ralston and a bit of Sadhguru. I didn't like their approach Well, maybe yes, but above all, it's a constant intuition that you have to open up. Obviously, if you feel depressed and bitter, you look for a way out. But you know you're depressed because you're trapped; you sense it. You don't want to open up to stop being depressed, but because it's a necessary movement, and you also assume it will help with your mental suffering, because closeness is synonymous of mental suffering. The mental suffering is a signal that says: open up, break the barriers until no one remains. If not you will be trapped always and that's very bad business, no way.

Maybe we talk about the same thing, but for me, maybe what's missing here is the realization of what reality really is. Ultimate, total reality is limitlessness. But this is only an idea. Reality isn't knowing that it's limitlessness, but rather being that limitlessness completely, opening yourself completely, temporarily erasing the limits that constitute you in this concrete form to be the "substance", independent of form. Limitlessness isn't a tranquil peace, as the Buddhists say; it's the infinite abyss of absolute potentiality. Let's say that the cause of reality is, is its limitlessness. Limitlessness is equivalent to infinite being, and its vitality, its force, its depth, are limitless. if you open yourself to it completely, you are burned, disintegrated. Only the whole remains, and in the whole, you don't know that you will always exist. "Always" means nothing; it is total, period. Enlightenment is being the total. It can't be described because any description occurs in the total. It cannot be understood either because understanding is only a structure that occurs in it, the same as form. Then you always perceive that reality is this, and always is, but it's veiled by the structure. You "know" as structure, but you aren't totally open, because you are also the structure. The total openess can happen in some moments, some instants. Id say that if you are all time in total openess you will die soon. It's not the natural way to be as a form. The thought always hypnotize if you are closed to the limitless. It's not the thought, it's your energetic structure. The thought is just an expression, an emanation of the totality of the form, an effect that also is a cause. It's Maya if you are maya, it's open if you are open

@Water by the River I summarize the story so you can form an accurate opinion: On the one hand, there are those who accept Advaita Vedanta (neo?) philosophy, and to some extent Buddhism: conceptual thought is maya; reality is direct, without thought. Enlightenment is already the case, but thought veils it. On the other hand, there are those who claim that reality has a source, and that source is God, and enlightenment is realizing god. Since that source is absolute, they are obviously that source. Let's say both are right and both are profoundly wrong. First, true opening is beyond the conceptual. It is penetrating within yourself, dissolving all duality, facing your energetic barriers made of fear and desire, opening them, and becoming one with your total nature. Okay, step 1. Does this mean that conceptual thought is "maya," or rather, that it is the absolute in the form of conceptual thought? 2. The creative source. Obviously, form exists, and obviously, form is relationship. Cause and effect, so the logical thing would be to think that there exists a primordial source that emits form: God. This isn't possible in infinity, since it would be a limit, a center. Centers are infinite; the cause has no origin, therefore, it can be developed infinitely. There is no God, or everything is God. Choose what you like best. Now I say: Let there be reality! And this phrase is infinite, therefore, it reverberates in eternity and creates an infinite chain of cause and effect that gives rise to the totality of form. But of course, any other structure does the same; everything is God, everything is cause and effect. The absolute is not the cause, is the material, the nature of the reality. Not the center, just the unlimited that inevitably allows the infinite forms . There is no beginning or end, no limits in any direction. So, from your personal perspective, what is enlightenment? About what you say about contraction, agree. Openenss is the opposite of the contraction, or better, the absence of contraction