The0Self

Repressed anger comes out of the position that not-anger is actually better than anger. There's no basis for that position. Preference for not-anger is fine! But perhaps just notice it as a mere preference, if it is indeed an actual preference (you might actually have a preference for anger, at least some of the time, lol). Expressing the anger in a safe way perhaps could be relieving.

Appreciate the contribution, but from here all I can say is that whether she "puts out" on the first date or even in the first hour is completely irrelevant and I wouldn't think even slightly less of her, neither in relation to how much of a catch she is nor to how much she's compatible with me nor to how much I should worry about her cheating. In fact, even cheating itself is actually completely irrelevant to me now, and THAT's the only thing I'd say most others won't relate to, as it wasn't always that way for me... But now, as far as I'm concerned, if she wants to cheat, then as long as she tells me, I'm totally fine with it -- and that's actually never even happened to me. In my experience, if you don't care if a woman cheats, she generally will not cheat, because you're quite secure. And even if she does, no one gives a fuck. If anything the only problem this presents is the woman getting jealous (of other women you talk to) rather easily because you're perceived almost as un-have-able, unless she has the same outlook on cheating, which takes a very, very mature (and/or perhaps naturally polyamorous?) woman. Of course if you both have that same outlook, there's no such thing as cheating anyway.

Can kind of relate but not in the same way at all... I wouldn't wish it for myself but I have wondered how it would be if I were bi. Seems like it'd be pretty awesome! Being straight is awesome too though, so it's whatever. But yeah I've definitely seemed to want to be bi in the past. If there is a scale of straight 0 to gay 10, then I would literally be 0.000... I actually can't really even tell if any given male is attractive or not, and certainly not how he compares to others (other than merely by societally recognized negative traits such as overweight, etc, but hardly even then...) -- Perhaps that's why there was a longing curiosity about being bi... it was just so unknown and foreign. There was certainly never any longing whatsoever for being gay though -- I loved women so much it's just too magical for me to have let go of that preference in favor of something else... aside from open mindedness exercises, of course... And about that: I used to feel disgust at the idea of gay sex, but one of Leo's open mindedness videos suggested a technique of imagining myself having gay sex -- I think it was aimed at people with repressed homosexuality, which I never had, nor do I have now, but I did it anyway as a simple open mindedness exercise. It actually seemed to be worthwhile! Because, while I still had absolutely no passion for homosexuality, I was no longer disgusted by it. Not that I ever thought it was wrong, it just made me feel disgust, which was a rather uncomfortable trait which Leo's vid helped me to solve (in my story). Not that it needed solving, of course, but it was at the very least... neat. Thanks Leo!

Hey, it's better than Jim Newman's response from something similar: "I'll buy you the rope."

@Twega “What can I do to become enlightened” is the whole misunderstanding.

No idea what to make of dreams. Sort of off topic, but the only thing noteworthy I can say about dreams, is that after getting pretty skilled at meditation, it apparently unlocked the ability to read in dreams. Used to try to read in dreams and the letters would be all jumbled -- now I can basically pick up a novel and read it if my dream body did so. It's kind of cool Just last night I was dreaming that I was shopping and I could read all the labels as if it were waking life.

Exactly. What is unreal appears as real when a knower arises in the appearance. Apparently hiding the lack of any separation of any kind at all between real and unreal, which are the precise exact same, and in fact... not even the same! Because they aren’t even two separate things that could be called “the same.” ?

I probably had ADHD. Enlightenment is absolutely not what you’re expecting. It’s this without anyone knowing what it is, and btw already there’s no one who knows, so... What exactly are you waiting for? What you’re waiting for is unknowing — to the point where going to sleep might as well be waking up. And not even that. You will not know this, as it’s not a state, and there is of course no knowing in the first place. You will never notice your own death (enlightenment) because there’s nothing to notice. So there is no enlightenment to be attained. It’s a dream the infinite is apparently having. Enlightenment has precisely and exactly nothing to do with you.

It’s not you that made the decision anyway. There’s nothing to forgive or to heal from. I hear you though — yeah the psychedelics can really seem to turn up the reality meter on the social fabric. The social fabric is based on the baseless yet unavoidable assumption that there’s someone who has a life that can be made better or worse through their own free will. Yes it can seem quite real. In all that, there’s something else beyond those apparent stakes happening all the while, and it has no stakes and asks nothing.

Thank you! ❤️ Love imagining itself to be separate from love in order to maybe get a glimpse of its own beauty. Well, minus the “in order to” — it doesn’t even need a reason. ❤️

There’s nothing to understand.

To be righteous is to reject God. To neither accept nor reject righteousness and be free of it is to abide as God. I don't know... Totally a story, but it's what seemed to want to be said.

That's deep self compassion speaking there. It's beautiful and has no need to be recognized as such.

Haha perhaps! I doubt it though you'd be the first I've found! I brazenly LOVE Shania Twain and Lee Ann Womack etc equally as much as Escape the Fate and A Day to Remember etc...

Sounds great! Just brazenly be... Yourself.

There's just what's appearing to happen, and there's no separation of any kind at all. Nor is there real causality or even context of any sort. Go ahead and try to figure that out logically -- you can't, but if you could, you would not survive it. Automatically as the answer is revealed, there's no one left to know what it is. Inconceivable love. Unknowing. Freedom. Nothing.

The hysterical crying-laughter associated with the recognition that there's nothing happening and there isn't a reality... Oh my God... The best. There's...just what's appearing to happen...which is absolutely nothing...lol Even philosophers who admit that reality is beyond logic... well they don't seem to believe it lol because they come up with logical explanations for an illogical reality. Sounds logical!

I almost fell asleep reading this. Boring.... zzzzzzzzzzz... sorry I'm just messing with you lol

You could say that. There's nothing to find because there's only everything, which is unknowable. What you are is ungraspable.

There is a freedom in not needing to be okay with it. Acceptance happens or it doesn't. Enjoy the ride.

Yeah, exactly; for any man worth dating it is utterly irrelevant. There would just be magic playing out exactly as it does.

Moderna 1: Flu-like aches the following ~1 day (onset at about T+16h after injection). Brain fog for 4 days. Hardly any injection site pain. Moderna 2: Much, much more intense flu-like aches (than the first shot) the following 2 days, along with some pretty intense shoulder and neck pain for those same 2 days. Almost certainly was running a fever but I don't know because I never actually checked my temp. Tiny bit of brain fog for 3 days. Can only imagine how bad actually getting COVID while unvaccinated could have been.

1. Put yourself out there. 2. Forget you ever even heard the term Chad/Stacy... Like the concept never existed.

Totally useless info but I can chime in: Usually second date but if it's possible on first, then first. Totally would not think any less of a woman whatsoever if it was first date. Having sex on second (or later) date purely out of principle though? Strikes me as a rather artificial, gamey thing... but that's just IMO. I don't know. It can just play out naturally. Good luck!

This sitting on a chair typing is appearing for no reason, with no need for a backstory, and this has no clue about what sitting on a chair typing means, nor if it's actually happening or not. Hopes and fears are equally real and unreal.