The0Self

I’m not enlightened btw, but I’m on the brink and literally am about to die.

“I” realized God in ways you clearly haven’t. This is about more than mere God-realization. You aren’t conscious of what God really is. If you only knew what going “further” actually meant for me over here... well you don’t know. It’s alright. It’s not fun and games like you seem to assume.

You aren’t reading this sentence right now. To “you” it may feel like you definitely are. That is God dreaming. It isn’t happening. Let me explain, but I warn you, you either won’t get it, or you will: First, the infinite is all, so nothing should really be surprising. Keep that in mind. With that said... One good example that is at least possible to see through: You believe, for absolutely no good reason, that prior events cause later events. You might believe this is obvious, but that’s another belief for which perfect (yet completely illusory) evidence may arise for — you may further believe you learned this or assumed it or were told this and you believed it. ALL those claims are actually flat false. Completely self contained belief world. God dreaming. That’s why you die when you realize emptiness (emptiness seen by nobody). It’s the end of something that never began.

You probably think you can understand more of this and apply it to your life. If you truly see enough of it, it will literally erase the individual out of sheer love. The part you misunderstand, however... here’s modified form; the perhaps shocking situation: There is only what is. God isn’t actually dreaming a separate reality — it is literally a strange loop illusion: belief A creating evidence B which creates belief A again. It isn’t actually happening. If this is seen, enlightenment of you (erasure of God) can occur, but even if not, you’ll never be the same.

@Kalo Those are all false claims. The only “real” God is is-ness itself — there is nothing else. And really, it just shows lack of insight when one is not willing to call it by its rightful name, Unconditional Love ❤️ You need it to feel like it makes sense. It doesn’t in actuality. Causality is an illusion as well. You aren’t there to see it, but the belief structures are the entire reality. You actually believe, for no good reason, that prior events cause later events. But it’s such a given, most would think I’m crazy for pointing that out. Evidence for beliefs arise out of themselves and create personal reality. But it isn’t actually happening, it just seems that way.

It seems to lead to all of those, quite effectively, with the exception of liberation. Nothing leads to that, simply by definition, since liberation is merely the end of all false claims, including but not limited to: time is real, space is real, I am here, past caused present, future is real, movement is real, something is needed, etc. With liberation it is recognized that nothing has ever lead to anything, nor even actually happened at all.

Yes, but God with any associated meaning isn't real -- this God is literally a REALization the individual can "have." But there's no individual, so yeah... If you're still there, your conception of God will necessarily be of this variety. In fact even if you aren't there, any conception of God will be of this variety. In other words, talking about God is quite literally masturbation. Not that there's anything wrong with that. "I" do it fairly often, in fact.

Since God is infinite, there are limitless ways in which it doesn't have to obey logic, alone. This means infinite playground...and every single belief can seem to make logical sense, when held. Like it's nothing... This is how infinite creation appears out of, and as, nothing.

The difference between existing, and being existence, is not trivial.

What you are calling God, is not God. Nothingness is not a thing, literally. There are no things. There is no God, since all there is, is God. God does not exist, since God is existence, which is emptiness, which is fullness. Watch thoughts as you respond next. Notice the explosion of false claims. Not judging, it just happens.

I've found 110ug is the perfect dose. For me, anyway.

God is a tautology. God is and is not. To say there is no god is either nonsensical, or actually true, since if ego is active, it will seem to have ideas about God, which are the obstruction to God — that which is beyond even itself, which is the exact same thing as nothingness.

Humility --> Awakenings You might not be fully taking into account the strange-loop nature of no-thing being everything. Just because one labels God differently than you... well, he clearly refers to “Being” in a way that you’d perhaps say “oh yeah that’s God.” He’d perhaps disagree. It’s words.

@Mu_ The retort of the ego will undoubtedly be “but I feel separated by time.” Seems this is because it is (understandably) assumed that there’s another time. There isn’t though... There’s only now. Doesn’t seem possible to really understand, but it is intuitively obvious from here, whether it’s ultimately true or not.

When I ignore everything (all experience; thought), vision, senses, and all body feeling go “blank,” but it feels like blank, so I ignore the blank too, as it’s just a subtle experience/thought, and much thought goes away, mind gets super quiet and still, and body feels intense pleasure. Then I ignore (“look away from”) the pleasure, stillness, and quiet too (turning from all experience, without exception). Then... it’s as if the big thought/experience of “looking out” is seen as a little tiny thought in a huge ocean that is “looking in.” Feels like “God.” If “I” keep on going ignoring that too, eventually either focus is lost, or it feels like everything is disappearing, but it doesn’t all go completely. Just very thin, like it’s not real. Does that sound familiar? What is going on there?

Well, memories of being in (deep, dreamless) sleep don’t ever seem to appear, but it does seem thoughts might arise during sleep, since after sleep an “amount-time-passed” thought forms. But... after anesthesia? Way different. It is basically like time traveling instantly to the future. During anesthesia (unconsciousness) there is no thought/sense/existence of any kind, including thought of time passing or anything at all. It’s like it didn’t even happen.

@ardacigin What you describe in full is actually just "concentration(stillness)/Samatha done right." Even this is not enough for awakening -- you need to use the power of the stilled mind to play with the lens you're necessarily viewing experience through, essentially. Some options: 1. Observe/objectify objects of dualistic experience until they fade, thousands of times. Viewing them as either impermanent, unsatisfactory, not-me/mine/self, or empty of existence outside the mind's construction -- watch closely, many times, how deliberately simplifying your lens to one of these "insight-lenses" more tends to fade experience, while using them less tends to build experience. 2. Maintain extremely open awareness by practicing merging attention and awareness together. 3. Self inquiry 4. Noting 5. Witnessing -- the technical description of which is basically just "find the place beyond movement and place attention on it, so that attention collapses back in on itself, and the actual focus of attention becomes: watching from a detached perspective," which gets attention out of the way so that metacognitive awareness predominates. I'll add... In the early stages, a great formula for getting the ball rolling with concentration/Samatha is: Unless you can remain attentive to the breath sensations indefinitely, your main focused intent should be cultivating the readiness to emit appreciative joy upon noticing you're distracted from the breath sensations. Then gently and firmly return to the breath sensations (the only physical sensations you should ever deliberately intend to focus on, in the early stages). This creates positive feedback loop through repeated positive reinforcement, and eventually the mind will "notice distraction the instant it occurs" (i.e. introspective awareness is constant; distraction does not occur) -- though it may take some time during a session to get to that point. Sets the foundation for later skilled practices like Jhana; Witnessing; etc.

Yeah. It’s just an expression, though: if “I” does not exist, I certainly can’t know. The one who knows is nowhere to be found

Arising/appearing: “I” seems to be a belief of first person perspective, worldview appears as wispy thought/idea forms, memory and images arise of the house body is in. I has never found me, me has never found I. Awareness is an idea in what appears to be a mind. The thoughts appear to be here, but “here” also is a belief and just appears as idea. “I don’t know” thought appears. In what? No one here knows. Other than to say awareness, which has never been found. By “thought” I mean they appear as imagined images and sounds. Thoughts just seem to happen.

? Well, Thought just arose. No one knows it actually happened, but no doubt it seemed to happen ??

Being is just a more subtle I AM (even the words literally mean the same thing, just from different perspectives); as long as there is experience, an I AM is in play.

I don’t get it. Guess you just had to be there? budum...tsss ? Kidding “Dedication is must” is a phrase I’ve definitely seen you say on here before. You’ve been known to tell people to meditate as well. But to answer the question, stuff would apparently happen. Not “in” something though... and almost certainly not in a “head,” ?

That is largely congruent with my experience. Guess there are just many facets, but they’re of course ultimately interdependent. I certainly experience the God-consciousness direction you speak of as being FAR (immeasurably) more “vast” than the emptiness direction, but what I am not hearing from you is any indication that the emptiness direction has a limit. From here, it does in fact seem (though I could be wrong) that emptiness both has a limit, and is alone associated with what most refer to as “enlightenment” — once it’s absolutely clear that every-thing (including all objects; thoughts, ideas, assumptions, the separate-self, the knower, and even knowing) is unfathomable, has no existence as a thing in itself, etc... AND the mind is steady enough to “never forget it...” I don’t really see a “further,” apart from maybe, in a roundabout way, so-called “Concentration” (not a great word for what I really mean: steadiness + happiness). But yeah, the God-consciousness/Love direction is not only more amazing ime, but from here, I don’t see any end in sight, or even possible. Just keeps going. Seems both directions could be said to be unified as the all-inclusive “Unconditional Love axis” ❤️

Two things are possible: 1. With chronic use of SNRI/SSRI, there will be a desensitization of serotonin receptors, causing psychedelics to lose their effectiveness. 2. Combining 2 or more serotonergic drugs can lead to serotonin syndrome. I've had it before... Wasn't even trying to trip. Took cough medicine max dose, actually prescribed for cough (DXM, an SRI) with Zoloft (sertraline, an SSRI)... Dude, if only I had known just how unpleasant SS was, I would have never even come close to taking 2 serotonergics together. It was HELL. Shaking so hard I looked possessed, sweat pouring off me, BP 180 over something ridiculous, HR 180 as well... And the most intense sensation of pure fear -- it felt like skydiving and realizing you forgot the parachute just after the jump. All this on top of a burning restless agony that resembled opioid withdrawal. I can imagine someone with this condition attempting to drive themselves to the ER, seriously considering just driving into a tree and ending it right there, the suffering was so intense. And I've been through heroin withdrawal. SS was at least as bad, and apparently really deadly... You literally shiver SO HARD that the heat produced by the muscle clonus alone can cause brain damage, with core body temperature as high as 108°F. It was utterly horrific! A truly catastrophic event. Avoid.

Without hardship, there is no overcoming hardship. Without great hardship, there is no overcoming great hardship.