Princess Arabia

You're just spoilt and need everything to be perfect for that sweet little mind of yours. That mind is like a child throwing temper tantrums. Then when it gets what it wants, it's still not satisfied. You'd be crying for disorder if everything seemed orderly, fun and perfect. Yes, you would. Don't deny it.😛

Imagine something being fun for the rest of eternity - forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and.........now, that doesn't seem like fun.

How can humans truly know anything when all information is being filtered through the brain which is itself a filter.

Lol. It has to survive it's identity as an internet arguer.

I want you to, and this will all depend on where you're from and culture, but regardless, whenever you're out and about take note of how many men you see just staring at the average female. Look around from now on and be observant without being noticeable. Look if people aren't just going about their business, men and women without anyone in particular being noticed unless he or she is very, very attractive and just really stand out in the crowd. I don't need you to tell me because i know what the answer is. Everybody, most, are invisible to the next. The only place you'll see quite the contrary are in small settings, where people mostly know each other, at parties or in clubs where people are fishing for potential lays. They'll be looking around for people they are attracted to, to go home or make out with; guys checking out females and females checking out guys. The more attractive the more eyes they get, yes but that's not the point here. The point is every body is invisible to everybody else until the "everbodys" have an agenda or motive. Your mind has exaggerated things to expand it's feeling of lack with the opposite sex and is believing in irrational things like I'm invisible when in truth most people are invisible to everyone else. Please really see what I'm saying here. It's hard for you to really see how irrational and illogical you are in this context because you are trapped within it's confinements. I can spot them easily because I'm on the outside looking in. Not only that, things you say can easily go for me also on the general scale, but because I'm not going through what you're going through, I don't see them from the same perspective; meaning, I've been invisible many times but because I didn't care to be picked up or noticed in those moments, it wasn't a problem for the brain to be solved. I wasn't trying to be noticed, so I didn't feel invisible. The only reason you feel invisible is because you have a motive an agenda - you want to feel visible, you want to feel attractive, so you are focused on feeling invisible. If you didn't care at the time you were not being paid attention to, you wouldn't feel invisible. Most people aren't being noticed just in everyday life. You have to put yourself out there to be noticed, and that includes myself and depending on my motive and what I want to achieve. Nothing comes knocking at your doorstep unless it's the Jehovah's Witness. Not saying you're not invisible, but so is everyone else. Women don't go around cat-calling guys and most women who go home with guys, the guys had to put in the effort of an approach. Before that, they were probably invisible too.

I love the way you've been talking lately. It's not as popular, because most are identified with the ego mind and are attached to the outside world. The mind cannot go within because it's not designed to, nor is it even capable. It's always looking outside of itself and in the past and future where problems live. Problems cannot live in the present and that's why we see so many people with problems. It's not that we have problems, but more of what we think about what is currently happening. This is where my main focus lies. To stay in a place of awareness of true identity and to allow what's taking place to be there without judgment, criticism or attachment and to abide in the place where nothing is affected. Takes practice but well worth it. Not trying to get something but to recognize there's nothing to get.

Never said that. That's preposterous for you to think I'd believe you're at the same level as me. (joking).... But seriously, though, remember my going to school and being able to read and write VS someone who can't analogy, that's suggesting we're all not on the same level. Another misinterpretation on your part of what I said. I never even mentioned the word level. If I can remember, what I was saying was, someone doing yoga or samsara or whatever term you used is only getting a different experience and different results from say someone who studies about cars. Their life experience will be more enriched being able to meditate and get more peace or teach or become a yogi mystic, etc, all that does is give a different experience than say someone doing drugs and ruining their lives The difference is in the experience and not bringing them any closer to what they already are which is Awareness as that is already the case and need no practicing to accomplish.

Ok.

Problem right here. You don't trust yourself. You're even asking us to tell you what we think about your thinking. I think you've misunderstood what thinking for yourself actually means. It doesn't mean to question everything; nor does it mean you have to listen or not listen and adhere to other's perspectives. It's merely suggesting, imo, that you not just go by what other's say, but to follow your inner guidance and to try and be analytical using your own logic and reasoning capabilities so this way, you train the mind to not just be a follower but to be able to recognize and put in place what's more suitable for your life's circumstances and not for the majority. We all have different learning styles too; and personally, I like to get information from various sources so I have things to compare other things to. This is coming from a place where I love to have options. If I were to just follow one person's teaching style, I feel I would start to become that person (to a degree) and not have a mind of my own. To me, that leads to idolatry and impersonation and a loss of personal identity.

My point though is not about looking good but caring for caring sake. People shouldn't have to prove their worthiness to be shown some type of caring. A man doesn't have to prove himself to me for me to care about his challenges in life. I'm on a forum having a discussion, I don't need for you to prove to me why I should care about what you're going through in life and if I can be of assistance - in the dating world or not.

This is part of the problem right here why so many men are struggling with women. RIGHT HERE. They'll pretend, but women can sense these pretenses. You are not alone in feeling this way, and even though I'm giving you slack because I think you have strayed away from my point, never mind that, you have hit the nail on the head with this comment. At least you are being straight up and honest about it. Most women have sensed this and is one of the reasons they are fighting back and only going towards men of means and status because it's not worth the hassle and bustle of dealing with low stats men who don't care about their feelings and what it is they want and desire. Most men, of low caliber are usually out for just themselves while wanting a lot from their partners. This is a whole other topic. @NoSelfSelfthis says Princess Arabia said, but I was quoting you.

You have made this post about you. Cheers.

Right, you can't give what you don't have.

Thank you for this. I didn't stress on the safety issue because I didn't want this to be about fear and distrust. It is a major concern, though, and most times, especially if it's on the street us ladies have to be cautious of who we even smile at or say hi to. Most guys don't think about this because they really don't have this problem as much except to be drugged and robbed and that's not very common and usually in high-risk circumstances.

You're telling me about the one who is original. I'm not looking for an original man. I'm not even looking for one that looks beyond the body because I want him to be sexually attracted to me, just sees it as an accompaniment, not separate than - meaning, " oh, and her personality is great too". Not that, sees the whole package. I also don't need for a man to intrigue me. I'm not looking to adore or be "wowed" and to idolize. You are still projecting your beliefs unto what you think I want or desire in a man. Nothing in my post suggested any particular trait or what it is I'm looking for. All I did was expressed how it's not easy for us sometimes and that us ladies are also finding it challenging. You keep telling me what I want in a man and telling me how I don't know you and misunderstand you, when it seems to be the other way around. Please read my post again, to see how this is not about what I'm looking for in a man but that we are also having trouble be cause of how we date.

No, I'm looking for compatibility. One that complements my character. I don't need an original or one that stands out from the crowd. Even this right here shows how we're being misunderstood. I'm not doing a model search where they need to stand out from the crowd. Standing out from the crowd means you've already assessed the crowd to not be your type and he needs to stand out from the rest. Nothing in my post suggests that most guys just aren't my type. What I'm saying is, we have to do more than just look at a body to know this and it takes time and energy to realize if he is or not. Please don't project your existing beliefs unto what I'm trying to portray here and try to read and understand what I am saying VS what you think I'm trying to say. My post is pretty lengthy for this reason, so I could make myself clear on my position, plus I don't need a guy to have game.

I'm not referring to this. I'm not speaking about how others are being perceived by onlookers. I'm speaking about romantic relationships. Maybe be clear on what type of relationships you're referring to or just generally speaking. Also, not showing respect to someone who shows love to themselves isn't a bug it's a feature because on the flip side what you're seeing is a case of how you react to that. How does that make you feel and does it diminish how you feel about yourself. You will double down on your self worth if their disrespect and jealousy doesn't change how you feel about yourself and you understand that it's about them not you. Idk, I don't look to be loved, I look to be love. Sorry if my words sound woo woo and all but I cannot change who I am and my way of thinking and being is being reflected in my writings and it's just what's coming out.

Yes, I'm not speaking about non-duality. If we love ourselves, we will see others love us back in proportion to that. We cannot expect from others what we haven't given to ourselves.

If we love ourselves. We only get from people how we see ourselves.

Exactly.

Don't care about tik tok and social media dating stories. Nothing new under the sun. Just more publicized because of social media and our obsession with it. Watching that stuff and focusing on those types stuff does nothing but embed in our brains what we think the world is like, when in fact; successful, great quality, and happy relationships don't make the news as much or shown as much because it doesn't satisfy the mind's quench for drama and problems. By watching these stories you are not empowering or helping yourself, you are weakening and disempowering the mind to be more in a victimhood state. What are you getting from it? CONFIRMATION OF YOUR EXISTING BELIEFS - beliefs that are not serving you. You are a victim to your own circumstances.

Might be is speculation. Women aren't having sex with themselves.

Who the heck are these women with, themselves? Makes no sense.

I don't know, but it seems these women you're talking about that can easily find a man, these men are also with these women. Saying women can easily find a man yet complaining how hard it is for men to find women seems like an oxymoron. Obviously it's not hard for men because these women aren't with themselves or other women. IT'S MEN THEY'RE WITH. Your post is a great example that we have belief systems that aren't true; and we make them up as excuses as to why we're not accomplishing our goals. This one isn't obvious and kind of hard to see through because so many also believe what you're saying about how women finding it easy. So, you'll hear, "yeah man, you have to go out more and socialize". Yes, that's true; but how about addressing the fact that you're believing something that isn't true and it's showing up in your direct experience as so. I'm so sick of hearing about how women find it easy when that is also a misconception. Women can get laid whenever and by whomever, but women don't want to be, so they also have it hard finding the perfect lay, men are not as picky if it's just a lay they're looking for, as shown in your first sentence. Women have to usually feel something, men don't. It's not a judgement; it is what it is.

Haha, I tried to Google too and a bunch of recipes came up. Still not sure what it means. The did look good.