No-Thing

Have you tried CDB oil?

Hey Buba, how nice to hear from you. As you can see this path is calling you. Circumstances like depression make you let go of the superficial and look for the meaning or deep questions of life. Here are some insights that helped me to navigate through the dark days. The idea that "everything is meaningless" has nothing to do with the emotion or the deep whole that you feel inside. I right now I can think everything is meaningless but that doesn't bother me because of the state I am in. So realize there is this dark emotional cloud inside of you and that your mind needs to come up with a fitting story to it "everything is meaningless", because that is what it does. In truth everything is meaningless but at the same time everything is absolutely meaningful can you see that? Trust. One thing that you slowly develop is to trust that everything is perfect as it is. You are being taken care of, even if from the perspective that you have at the moment you can't really see it (yet). The more trust you develop, the better life will become. Can you trust? (what you trust is really doesn't matter that much, pick your favorite). Here is quote of einstein: "The most important decision we can make is wether we believe in a friendly or hostile universe." Buba, I have absolute trust that you will do exactly the right thing at the right time.

look at all these dream characters. such pretty much wow

I had an LSD trip a couple of days before a vipassan retreat. It activated my kundalini (or whatever you want to call the physical component of this process) while on retreat. Listen to yourself. What part of you is saying it is the right thing to do and which part is saying it is too much?

once you purified your emotional reactive patterns and traumas you can trust your emotions 100%. What is trust? Trust is surrender. If you would 100% trust yourself right now, you would be enlightened and all your emotional trauma would dissolve. An enlightened person sees you as 100% authentic. You are 100% authentically playing an ego denying that your essence is oneness.

Of course, it is everywhere you look. It is everything. It's relatively easy to see it in something as beautiful as this song. But can you see it in a pile a shit? Can you see in your annoying family? Can you see it in your pain? Can you see it in hate, fear and death? <3 But what do I say, you are absolutely perfect.

You are coming at it from a point of "I am in control, I need to stop racing with my thoughts to the future". But that is not the way to go from my experience. How it works is to question the beliefs that make your thoughts race into the future. Once you let go of the beliefs, less thoughts will arise automatically, just like now they are arising automatically. What do you want to control in the future? What are your fears about your future? What is the assumption that creates those fears? If all is oneness and oneness is love, why do you need to worry about those things? Do you experience fear of missing out? Can you admit to yourself that you are addicted to fantasising about the future? Addicted to controlling the outcome? Trust Develop faith Love

Play this song: It's you, It's you, It's all for you! Hello my lover, my friend, my mother, my sister, my brother, my child. Are you still playing the looking game? Looking looking where am I, who am I? It's you!! Don't you remember? Do you remember how we played together in the park? Do you remember how we loved each other? Do you remember how we fought and killed each other? Don't you remember? It's you! You are looking for you Don't you remember, how you wrote this post? Don't you remember how you shot all this videos on youtube and played the Leo character? There is nothing but you, it's all you! From here to the beginning of time, and the end of time. It's all you! It's all for you. And now you believe you are in this body and you think something is wrong with you. Wake up stupid! There is no right and wrong, there is here and there, there are no others, there is nothing to attain, nothing to gain. It's all already here and you are it! Try to remember the feeling you had when you were in your mothers womb. Try to remember when you fell in love the first time. When you lie in the sun with your best friends in the summer. Ahh, that's you. It's all for you. Do you still think there are others out there? Do you still think there is out there out there? There are no others. There is no out there! You wrote these words. Wake up my love. I am here with you, you created me to be here for you. To write this for you so that you can remember. You are completely safe, there is nothing to worry about. Just enjoy the show, you created this for yourself. Don't you like the show? Maybe you can see now. Maybe you see a little clearer. Maybe your eyes hurt because you haven't seen this clear in a while. Maybe these thoughts come up again, that tell you a story. Tell you what if this, what if that. If you like, you can go back to sleep and dream the dream a little longer. But don't worry, everything is perfect as it is. You got yourself covered. When you want to wake up again you can! There are many you's that already woke up and they are loving you like their own child and will help you wake up again, whenever you want. I love you! Cheers, You

For a while almost every night I listened to this while in deep meditation: No intellectualising, no thoughts, listen to this and just look. Look what is there in your direct experience.

There are many techniques that can bring you all the way. The question you need to ask yourself is which one has the best results for me at this stage of my development. A technique that works great now might not be so suitable in a couple of months from now an visa versa. So I'd suggest, dedicate to a technique for a week and see how much you progress. Are you seeing changes in your daily life? If so, continue until you feel the need to try something else or you stagnate. From my experience Vipassana is a good technique to burn through layers of your emotional wounds. Contemplation & inquiry is good to have a breakthrough, which results in a direct of experience of what you focussed on. If you focus on nothingness long enough, you will experience it directly eventually. If you would be able to sit down and focus intensely on nothingness for 20 hours a day, you would get there in no time. A breakthrough experience will shed layers of your ego and emotional wounds. Letting go of your ego and emotional wounds will make it easier to have breakthroughs. Start somewhere but start and practiced diligently and persistently, diligently and persistently.

After a certain point (while meditation) there are no thoughts anymore, or they are mere in the background. You let go and detach of what you perceive in your direct experience. You feel on a bodily level where you still hold on (it feels like tension or density) and let go and transcend that. This holding on is the bodily expression of a certain belief you are emotionally invested in. So yes it is self-inquiry in a different form. Vipassana is a great technique but it can only get you so far (which is very far). At this point there is not much to let go of and even the attempt to use any type of technique is a step in the wrong direction. At this point you know which direction you have to go in and you need no teacher anymore. But you still have a daily live, where teaching can help you with your development and integration. But in deep meditation at a certain point there is no technique anymore.

In order to wake up fully your whole nervous system has to restructure itself. All knots will unknot themselves. Once you stop resisting life and stop creating new knots slowly the old suppressed once start to bubble up. This process of unkotting in some circles is referred to as kundalini. Once this process has started and you abstain from creating new blockages in your life, it goes on by itself and all you need to do is to surrender to it. I would still say that certain yoga practices and meditation techniques (as well as general lifestyle) can smoothen out the process and even accelerate it. In my case, for a couple of months the old started to bubble up like you explained. Then I went to a vipassana retreat and that was when hell broke loose and all the most gross and painfull knots evaporated. I was able to burn through all the painfull knots in 10 days. I am very grateful that I could go through that process on reatreat and that I didn't need to deal with that in my daily life. 1. A warning, don't try to accelerate it too much if your life currently does not allow you to rest and spend some time in bed regularly 2. If you think that the process starts and it hits you will full force, go do a vipassan retreat.

I just wanted to share this topic to raise awareness about the idea that some psychopaths like to use spirituality as their masquerade to exploit and potentially abuse people. Here is a book I found about this topic: http://www.buddhistische-gesellschaft-berlin.de/downloads/saints-and-psychopaths.pdf Read the first couple of pages or the excerpt I shared if you are interested. Don't spend much time on this topic. Notice it and move on. Most of you are probably at a stage where it is quite impossible for a psychopath to manipulate you. But maybe for some new souls it could be a risk.

@Edvard From what I see now (I am not there yet fully) the ego is like a battery that needs to charge itself through validation, fears, wants, desires, cravings, aversions, not accepting the moment, yadda yadda. When the spiritual process starts something changes in the structure of the ego and the battery slowly drains and runs out. This process can take years. in my case it started mentally but slowly became more physical. You of course at some point also realize that there is no difference between mental and physical (only in degree, it is a spectrum). In this process the ego pulls out all the tricks it has to keep itself alive for a bit longer. One of the tricks is identification with emptiness or space. When that happens (stage 2) you are detached from everything. This detached state can last seconds or even months or years, dependent on how much you like it. At some point you get bored of it or whatever the reason is, I don't know and the process goes on. Then at some peak experience point through either psychedelics, meditation, live events, or just randomly you get infused with the knowing that you are one with everything. That you were there at the big bang, that you and the big bang are one now. Then the ego sees it's opportunity and latches onto that realization and identifies with being god. That can be fun for a while and it helps you to let go of many many fears. At this point your ego becomes weaker and weaker (or it get's stronger again because now you think you are the new incarnation of christ). At this point there is less and less you crave or averse. Thinks you didn't like that need doing, now you just do them because why the fuck not? There is no inner resistance. There is no better or worse. You still have preferences but they don't start an inner dialogue. At this point you also see more and more synchronizities in your life. You loose all your fears and aversion but you also loose all your dreams and hopes (which is the hard part). So at this point there is no preference between living and dying anymore. You could die today and that would be totally fine because you know death is just another scare tactic that the ego used to keep it's battery going. I don't know what happens when the ego-battery finally completely runs out because that didn't happen yet but I guess you then plunge into infinity once more. Some people also report that they see their past lives and take away their fears at their moment of death. Then your life reappears and you are back into normality only that your ego will never bother you again. It will arise when it is needed and keeps shut when you don't need it. Your life will be guided by something beyond thought. Thought will still be there but only when it is necessary. So yes, at times you will feel like you are actually dying and you will learn to be okay with that and trust that on a deeper level you are always perfectly fine. I had several occasions where my ego (I ) was deeply convinced that I am going to die and I learned to develop the faith to still plunge deeper. On a deeper level though there was a knowing that everything was okey and that my time on this planet is not over yet.

@Leo Gura @Edvard In this model No self is stage 2 and realizing god is stage 3. You can cry and weep about being god all day long and realize as many facets of it as you like but in the end enlightenment is stage 4. Stage is 4 is realizing with every cell of your body (getting rid of the ego in every cell of the body/ kundalini process/ burning away the unconscious "healing") that everything is exactly as it should be. You (god) put yourself on this planet to experience every moment as it is and not to prematurely return to god. Realizing god helps you to realize that but it is not enlightenment. In this model: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_stages_of_enlightenment It says enlightenment is: An Arahant is free from all of the five lower fetters and the five higher fetters, which are: 6. Craving for prosperity in the material world 7. Craving for existence in the ideal world (heaven) 8. Conceit 9. Restlessness 10. Ignorance So enlightenment is not realizing infinity but living your live free of the need to change or conceit anything. Which stands in opposition the work @Leo Gura does and I am really curios about how he will solve this one. I struggle with it myself, it destroys me (which is the point).

Leo's blogpost kept me from working all day. His writing triggered my godhood realisations from various trips and contemplation. I couldn't find any reason to do anything anymore and just sat there in aww and bliss. Now I'm back to my personhood. It's fun. In the end enlightenment is a "wishless" state of not knowing. Maybe there comes a point where you go like, "okay the spirituality thing, that's that. Now let me just enjoy what I apparently created for myself right here right now. Oh, look a brezel and a beer. Prost!"

It is actually really simple. Practice without a story. See the sensations that make up your body for what they are. As they are in the moment without a story attached to it. Stick to vipassana only on retreat. In your own time you can experiment and mix as you like, but the technique works as it is. If you are unsure if you do it right, just ask your guides. If on retreat thoughts pop up like, "Oh maybe I should mix it up and do some self inquiry", then remember it is just your mind being bored or afraid because you are close to a breakthrough. Before an insight there is often a period of struggle, a fight going on inside you. If things get rough and tough remember that it's just the last straw of another part of your ego or unconscious mind that is about to break away. If you want to scream, run away, cry, mix it up, ... that is exactly the time when you should stay seated and work diligently. But paradoxically at the same time, you have to surrender. Surrender on the inside but stay equanimous on the outside. If thought's running through your head like, "Oh, please god I can't take it anymore. How could anybody have ever dealt with that? I give up, I give up, I surrender" even when you are not religious, then you know you are on the right path :-). You'll run through cycles. At times you'll feel completely normal, then you feel totally horrified and disgusted by all that crap and you want it to end, then you'll have a breakthrough and you'll feel spiritual and want to tell all your friends and family about it. Rinse and repeat. It's all normal. Observe how your state changes but stay equanimous. I wish you all the best!

Stick to vipassana only but don't stay on the surface of your body but go inside. Feel every inch of your body bit by bit. Practice from morning till night and even when you wake up in the night. Practice while you eat, while you pee, while you walk. Take it very, very, very seriously. Be prepared to have breakdowns, have breakdowns and stay seated. It is the breaking away of your will it is the right direction. Don't believe anything your mind tells you on retreat. Your ego tries to distract you from practicing because it knows it leads to it's death. Don't make up or believe any story your thoughts come up with. Just observe without any judgement as purely as you can. Make sure to push your concentration abilities in the first 3 days. Focus focus focus! Really focus. That means blending out everything else and only be absorbed by the area you focus on. Enjoy! Know you are totally safe. If you feel like you need to puke - smile! If you feel like you need to cry - smile! Feel the eternity shining through you. Everything else is just your mind playing games with you.

Yes? That's why you can't fly. What are the rules of lucid dreaming. If you get all excited that you are lucid while dreaming, you wake up. If you get all hyper because you are flying, you wake up. If you stay equanimous and calm then you settle in, you can fly and change your environment instantly. The same holds true for our waking reality only that it is much denser and (at least in our current shared experience) it takes much longer to manifest your intentions. The further you walk on the path the quicker it will be and the more synchronicities you will observe. Maybe it'll be never possible to fly in our current shared reality (or maybe everything is possible). Maybe if you die you are born in a reality where flying is possible if you choose so. Develop your muscle of staying calm and equanimous (on the inside) at whatever happens and see for yourself.

I had pressure at my forehead for more than a year and I also googled stuff like third eye and whatnot and tried to understand it that way. Based on my direct experience I changed my perspective as follows: Every time you crave, averse, resist or cling you suppress emotions. Over the course of your life this energy accumulates and forms the dense body you perceive right now. I call it the ego-body or ego-structure. When you start meditating and practicing spiritual techniques you learn to accept things as they are and thereby you start to reverse the process. At a certain point you cleared all your conscious stuff and that is when your unconscious stuff or suppressed stuff starts bubbling up and to be faced and resolved (finally). Your ego-body slowly resolves and for the first time you get the chance to experience your real body underneath the layers and layers of dense ego-structure. As we, in our current society, put a lot of our focus on thinking, a great deal of our identity is built around our thinking. In our ego-structure that shows as density in our head and especially behind the eyes of forehead as we think that is where our "I" resides. If you start questioning the "I" or practice meditation the ego-body at this part becomes less dense. The remaining tension (often the ego-body can be felt as tension) accumulates into one point and forms a ball which is felt as a pressure at your forehead. The only way to get rid of that pressure is to dissolve the ego-body fully through diligent serious practice. What will happen before that, is that this ball of pressure starts moving around in your head. It moves away from your awareness as it is unconscious energy and can not survive your awareness. Even with 24/7 (meditation) practice it will take weeks and weeks before this pressure dissolves and it becomes worse before it gets better. The technique that worked the best for me is Vipassana. In a nutshell: Keep practicing and amp it up. There is no quick fix to that pressure as it is part of your identity. If you can fully let go on every cell of your body, the pressure will be long gone. Don't make the mistake to create a story out of the pressure behind your forehead that influences your "normal life". Keep practicing, don't put too much importance to that pressure and don't make any life-changing decisions if you are in an unstable position.

In the video about his L-Lad trip Leo mentioned that he died inside and transcended his body. It's a way to put it and even though you need to be ready to die, not knowing what actually happens might create a mental story in your head that gets you unnecessary scared and keeps you from practicing diligently. Another way to put is to say that your ego-structure dies but your natural true body-mind finally gets revealed underneath the layers and layers of ego-structure. You are going to feel more alive and energetic than ever before. Your whole body becomes an ocean of tingling sensations that vibrate in harmony. The only thing that needs to be accepted in the process by the remaining ego-structure is that there is not you anymore. The you merges with everything that comes through it sense doors and there is no craving or aversion towards anything. Yes there is still a personality and preferences but your body-mind fully realized that any craving or aversion creates suffering for itself. To experience where most of your ego-structure is located inside the body-mind do the following. Lie down, breath out as far as you can and hold your breath for as long as you can and then longer. Where your body starts fighting and contracting, that is actually not a natural reflex but your ego-structure fighting for it's survival. If you are fully truth realized you know that "you" can't die and there will be no fight at the point of death. You can actually breath out and leave your body at any given point. Identifying yourself with goodhod or infinity (what leo talked about a lot recently) is stage 3 of this model: https://www.satshree.org/the-four-attainments-on-the-spiritual-path/. Truth-realization or seeing things as they are is stage 4. The quickest way to process towards that stage from my experience is to do a vipassana reatreat but instead of focussing on the outside you have to feel every part of your inside and outside. Your ego-structure is unconscious and the moment it gets seen by your awareness it get's finally experienced and then passes away. That is what every sensation in your body wants from you. It wants to be seen. If your awareness is on your mental story all the time and you are not fully aware of your body things start to get messy down. In order to dissolve your subconscious you need to have already had some awakening experiences and be completely clear on your conscious level. Then there are already some cracks in your ego-structure and your awareness for the first time can penetrate deeper layers. You then for example hold your awareness on your navel and hour after hour sensations arise and pass away that have been stored down there from your birth and create part of your unconscious behaviour pattern. Then you also start experiences sensate-phenomenon commonly described as shakras and kundalini. The vipassana technique is so brilliant for this process because you deal with all the stuff that comes up on a sensate level. There is so so so so much stuff down there and if you have to re-experience all that in your daily life and deal with it on a mental level I don't want to know how much suffering you create for yourself and others and how slow the process is compared to how quick you can burn through the layers while on retreat. If you are at a stage where your subconscious starts bubbling up by itself, you have many mood swings independent of outer circumstances and you start to feel lighter every week, then do a vipassana retreat and save yourself a lot of trouble. Follow the instructions diligently with this twist. Instead of focussing on the outside, penetrate the inside and hold your feeling-attention on every part of your body as long as it is necessary to clear it. You won't be able to do it all at once but you will develop equanimity and stop labeling your sensations unnecessarily. Also, practice every moment from waking up till going to sleep. Practice while you eat and practice in your sleep when possible. Take it very very seriously!

@starsofclay Don't do this while meditating on the cushion. Lie down in your bed and try it out 1 or 2 times. There were times where I started to get dizzy so be careful. But you will notice when your body starts fighting and where it starts fighting and then you can stop because that is all you need to know.

@nightrider1435 okey then in your own time, try to deal with whatever comes up on a sensational level. Stay grounded in your everyday experience and abstain from creating any story out of what goes on in me. For example I thought once I was possessed by deamons. But that was just a story of the mind and what was actually there where just some strange moving pressure. It is still a story but less frightening than deamons or whatever. Keep body awareness throughout your day. Always keep part of your attention on the spots in your body where your emotions normally arise and when they do, pause for a moment and see them as they are without creating a story. Develop equanimity, which means that whatever goes on in you do not crave, hold on or resist it. The more often you become aware of how you resist certain sensations the stronger your equanimity muscle grows and the easier it becomes. Remember that you are totally save. This is a natural process. Remember often that everything is always changing. When there are strong sensations, remember they are changing. Arising and passing away. The more you resist them the longer they stay so stop resisting and make them go away quicker.

@Joseph Maynor Yes, and the need to know or believe is "physically" anchored in the bodymind. If you dissolve and (literally) digest the egobody the need to know or believe drops away. Normally the egobody is experienced as the density of the body. When it dissolves all kind of sensations crawl up. mainly pressure (sometimes moving around), pain, aches, tingling, shivers, heat, twitching, bubbles ... . If you stay on a sensate level without craving or aversion it continues to dissolve. If you keep on attaching concenpts to sensations you keep fuelling it. There is for example no fear, there is only tension on different parts of your body which you labelled as fear throughout your life. You kept on running away from it and through that the tension accumulates and becomes stronger leading to pain. There is actually no tension there are only denser vibrations that you labeled as tension. there are actually no vibrations .... and so on. It's pointless.

Very interesting talk in which he explains his theory of everything. It's a long video but I guess you guys appreciate that (*wink*). His article gets deleted from Wikipedia. Is this the beginning of a paradigm shift in physics or is he just an self-taught amateur physicist?