Lyubov

I can relate to this experience. It seems from reading this you feel like you are misunderstood by them and you don’t feel like they are trying to understand you. You then sort of feel closed off and don’t feel like being emotionally open. Perhaps this is one aspect to it, you know if there are other layers to it but from what I read here this kinda sounds like one of them. It feels a bit unsafe and/or can feel like talking to a dog that doesn’t understand a word you’re saying and is running through the procedures. In this case I would just look for a person you “click” with. You know what I mean? You know how some people you just get along with cause you feel sort of aligned with their world view or their energy, conditions feel different, etc, whatever. Look around so to speak and open up when you feel safe and like you can trust this person. For me it becomes quickly apparent if I can work with someone after a couple sessions so just give it a bit of time. Write down your values and world views and look for a therapist that seems to hold similar stuff. I like therapists that are spiritually informed, have experience with psychedelics but also aren’t too deep into new agey stuff or are too overly esoteric when handling spiritual concepts in the sessions or pushing anything too much. Just compassion, openness, a willingness to understand, no judgment and a strong sense of containment and integrity.

This forum has a masculine / male bias for sure. I would say it’s largely because that’s the sort of crowd Leo’s videos attract. It’s very much male oriented and your sort of space that values masculine cognitive expression. I sometimes wish it was more of a space that welcomed different energies.

Traditional blue is like a Chinese finger trap. It feels super good getting into it but will be hard getting out. I also think blue values devotion more which is lost in orange.. it’s a key component to making long term work. Devotion is undervalued today in orange society and I think it makes it harder for people to get married and date. Incel and that sort of “hard finding a partner” stuff doesn’t exist as much in blue societies with an equal balance of men/women. At the same time one could make an argument that lots of stage blue marriages should of ended a while ago for both individuals to grow but it hasn’t due to it being stage blue. It’s tricky. I personally am fine dating orange/blue girls. A healthy blue / orange is possible for the short to semi long term (1-2 years). I’ve yet to see it play out in my personal experience going deep communion and long marriage (5-10+ years). To me I have a preference for women from stage blue countries too cause I find them them the most beautiful IMO.

I wouldn’t say most therapists are unconscious or in a “blind leading the blind” sort of situation. I think it’s 50/50 from my own experience. I would say relationship aspects come into play as well kinda like how different people get along better with different people. For me I’ve had sessions with therapists I didn’t jive with at all and some that helped a tremendous amount, helped me transform into a different person. I would say just keep an open mind and keep looking. You can feel out a few different therapists and decide on one after meeting with a few. You can bring some questions you want to ask them and get an idea for how accepting and open minded they are. For me I look for a therapist that gives me signs of high emotional intelligence and isn’t trying to push or “teach.” I prefer a more hands off approach because I realize such a person isn’t there to be my parent or teach me how to live my life. I also take into account that the therapist is human too and has their own strengths and weaknesses. Some topics the therapist can handle better than others. I look for a therapist I feel safe around disclosing everything to and if they are a good communicator, so they subtly communicate with judgement or do they have a strong grasp on how shame works and are very careful and compassionate. I basically look for a therapist that feels emotionally strong to me, safe to talk to, open minded and is not shaming. The one I’ve seen that helped a lot really facilitated for me letting go of a lot of shame and negative beliefs about myself formed from past experiences. How to handle OCD mind symptoms usually through expressing and talking about what lies behind them. From my experience obsessive/compulsive thought experiences usually have a deeper fear or trauma bellow them. The obsessive thoughts is sort of a very crude and unconsciously constructed defense mechanism to the stuff bellow it. When the defenses are safely let down and the stuff behind the obsessive thoughts is explored, a tremendous amount of mind clarity, grounding and a sense of embodiment with the present moment returns, kinda like leaving a self imposed prison for presences and well-being. It can be scary to leave this stuff sometimes because it’s familiar and there can be lots of defense mechanisms that can’t be just forcefully disarmed but slowly unraveled. I can relate to what you are saying about the obsessive mind. I struggled with that for years but really healed and brought back a tremendous amount of clarity and shame free self esteem and grounding/embodiment through therapy so I do proclaim that I think it’s probably the best treatment for a person really wrapped deeply in shame and strong negative self beliefs and trauma. It’s not something I’ve seen many people handle or heal on their own. Many people who say otherwise can’t appreciate just how entangled things can get. When you have a broken leg you need a surgeon to help you realign it. When you have a cut you can take a bandaid from cabinet. It took thousands of people to build beautiful buildings. Your emotional well-being is similar. We are all in this together and getting help and support for something you have problems doing on your own is not a problem. You may even find yourself stronger and more mentally healthy letting go of the heavy self responsibility to do it on your own and open up more where real change and healing can take place.

This is a good approach. I think from there, how much you “take yourself” subconsciously will be how attractive you are or rather how cool and relaxed you can be in your body. From there your social skills and stuff will sort of fall into place from experience. And you can do a bit of contemplating when you feel really calm and good. Going into that stuff when you’re feeling bad isn’t productive and can actually cause all sorts of emotional problems and entanglements. Do the reflecting when you feel good. For now just give yourself love and accept the feelings. Painful feelings like this are good because they are basically telling you there are some needs you have that aren’t being met and it’s usually self love and acceptance. It will pass

Sounds like you are trying to “figure it out.” I’ve found this to be unhelpful for the most part. I’m talking for myself so maybe it doesn’t apply to you. A bit of contemplation on improving is fine but I would just sit with the uncomfortable feelings and move on to the next date. Give yourself some self love. I’ve found just focusing on getting abundance and focusing on having fun and being care free on dates works best to find someone. When you focus on something like there is a problem it creates more problems. If you focus on just having avenues for experience like meeting lots of women then focus on being chill and having fun then that is what you will get. They mix together and you are then bound to find someone. Worked for me

I’m an idealist as well sometimes but I am not sure I’m totally anti death. It won’t ever be so black and white but there are ways to consciously handle inflicting death on other humans and it is sometimes necessary through war. Through the courts I’m not sure. I lean latterly towards not ok. There are some people so wrapped up in something violent and disturbing that having them dead may be mentally better for the guards around them. Thing is though the person that pulls the trigger won’t feel ok it’s tricky.

I think flossing is overrated. I think brushing is very important. I think you can floss once a day to occasionally or not even bother flossing and be fine. There is even some evidence that suggests flossing is overrated and gives such a tiny benefit that it’s not even that noticeable. I think diet plays an important role as well.

Ok fair enough, just seemed like you were trying to paint things more grimly than they are about infidelity. Maybe I misread your point.

This is where Vegas and your Peter Pan PUA lifestyle / RSD stuff is misguiding you. Like a war veteran who thinks every place is dangerous or a drug addict who thinks no friend can be trusted. You have a skewed picture of women and attraction. You are seeing low integrity all around you in the city of sin and painting it as a key component and some common thing in attraction. I’m not saying it doesn’t happen but check your bias and how you formed this view. You are attracting such women into your life because there is something fundamentally wrong with your approach if you are encountering this often. High integrity attracts high integrity. I’m not saying infidelity doesn’t happen but it’s not something to be so worried about or paint as incredibly common if you are conscious enough to avoid it and find the women that don’t partake. If you have a lot of experience and know how to screen you will rarely encounter it but some will become wounded and jaded by it cause it is like all unpleasant things in life. They do happen but not that often and you can learn to avoid hitting your hand with the hammer if you are keen and wise to.

My bad I think I confused you with like two other people cause you don’t have a photo

The guy has his wings in jail like you said and went to court for rape. That automatically should disqualify him from being discussed in this community as a viable source for men to improve with women. Fox News threads and conspiracy threads are closed here. The same level of integrity should be applied to male dating advice here.

You just BURIED this John clown Dude why do you keep mentioning this guy? Holy shit you can literally spend five minutes and find a better source than him. A trash bin will teach you better habits with women then that clown.

This is common especially in southern states. There are huge racial disparities with education.

I think he had sexual assault charges brought against him before.

The cult of personality around some PUA guys is weird. I remember people used to kiss so much ass in those Facebook groups and get into arguments over who was the best coach.

Just look at all those clowns sitting in that hotel seminar room listening to this dope. People really need to watch their information intake.

I’m looking for natural supplements to help with insomnia or when a person is feeling all sorts of somatic stress symptoms, ungrounding, or fight or flight feelings, especially at night where it disturbs sleep. I’ve heard rosemary and chamomile are good. I’ve tried melatonin but it doesn’t really work well for me. What are some other things I can take to help stuff like this, both preemptively and during ?

It varies some. It depends and I can break it down in two ways Women: Some people think the excessive make up, trying to look "luxury" type is the best, some are fine with a more relaxed look. I'm not super picky, I've found the excessive trying to look rich with generic designer brands and too much make up and cosmetic surgery to be a turn off. I like girls who are a nice mix of natural but also go to the salon regularly and do their nails. There is also the hipster look and just the girl next door look. I think it really depends on the person but women are sort of painted into a corner more here with having to look more stylish and be in better shape. Men: There are much more acceptable ways for men to look so to speak to be considered handsome. I would say physical features isn't even that high of a priority. It's more so how you dress and take care of yourself. You can have a bit of a beer gut too and it's not really a big deal. Being tall and in good shape helps but it's not mandatory so to speak.

Stage orange be thirsty as FUCK for investing in anything following trends like bitcoin and tesla lol

The senate is kinda crazy and it’s difficult to reform that due to the constitution. Makes no sense why Cali has 2 senators while some middle America red state with a tiny fraction of the population gets the same number. Issues like that will be generational.

I would say I last about the same with both actually, for various reasons. Condoms I would say are like minus 30-40% the sensations along the penis. Also the intimacy and psychological factor of feeling truly nude. I think it just feels much better without and I def prefer it. I am really not interested in sex with condoms, but it's by no means bad. I would much rather do it once or twice with a woman if it isn't a ONS then offer for us to both get tested and do it raw after if she is down for it.

I totally forgot about it but do you all remember that time Musk slandered that British diver guy who called Musk out on his bullshit? I don’t think I ever really payed much attention to him before that but I think that was the time I saw through his facade as some genius and just a master Twitter / Wall Street guy. He’s not as fake as Trump though.

Not knocking your experience, but I have no need for this myself. I don't know how this is possible to do in a relationship either. Passion needs to be expressed somehow. Men who are able to master this practice are exceptionally talented people. If you are a man with a high sex drive it's kinda like eating. You can't be happy without eating some. You don't have to gorge McDonalds but you need to eat. To say you should be able to be peaceful and happy without sex is very much disowning one of your core needs. It's like saying you should be able to be peaceful and happy without food and water. "Food is a biological necessity that controls you as long as you frame it that way." It's an unrealistic, ridiculous litmus test and not the game of life.

The video seems pretty intimate and sexual tbh. I don't think it's appropriate with someone you've only met a couple times. Probably just doing some mindful breathing together or some yoga together that doesn't require contact with each other. Spiritual practices I think can be misunderstood in a relationship and used for ulterior motives so I think stuff like this is better explored when there is integrity and trust between two people. It's like doing all sorts of crazy kinky extreme sex on the first date. I mean theoretically some people may be fine with it, in fact it may just be a fuck and more honest, but some won't and require trust. The thing with spiritual stuff like this is that it often carries the same amount of responsibility and integrity behind it but it isn't apparent upon first observation. It can be weaponized and used to manipulate. Spiritual stuff but just an excuse to get sexual.