Happy Lizard

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Everything posted by Happy Lizard

  1. I wrote a very long post about how I feel lost and can't find a career path form myself that goes with my intuition of what I feel is right for me. then I decided to summaries it for simplicity and so don't get too lost in details : basically I'm struggling to find a path in life, my college degree isn't what I like or hoped for, information technology is big and growing where I'm located and I thought that I'd easily find a job after graduating, especially since I have the skills, I'm good with coding and actually liked it. I excelled at it from the beginning, and was better than all my peers. I studied networking, studied data engineering and got certified as a cloud architect, but still can't find a job. I'm now hired with a recruiting company that is trying to find me a job with data engineering, but I'm still laking the motivation to go on and persue this all the way through. I really feel like I'm either going to get it or not, and it gets tough the more I find a challenge the more I feel like I can do it and will get somewhere and breakthrough, and then I don't. IDK I think data engineering might not be right for, me or anything in Information technology for that matter. the problem is: I've already completed college, I'm an immigrant and I need a job to get my life situation together. so its trying to balance both priorities, and what I would like to do in life, and it's a tough carp to go through, since I've got reality on one side and what I dream of becoming at the other. I really like art and everything visual since I was a child, it's really and truly me dream to become something within the art field. I really love it and would do anything to become a full time artist on any whatever medium. However, how do I now if I'm not making sacrifice in this situation ? the stability a regular job can get me can really switch my life upside down and give me so much self growth and motivation. truly. You see how I'm torn between two sides and trying to make the best choices I can with at-most maturity and sobriety considering my life situation. but I still feel like I'm not following my life calling. I wanted to make this post to see if the life purpose course is going to be suitable for me now ? should I do it later or now is a good time ? I don't know if I made it quite clear in the post but I have to be 100% sober in this life situation I'm in, and can't mess up and run after a dream at all. I don't know what the consequences of this might be, so I'm really focus on each step being the right step for me. I would really not like it if the life course purpose was to make me chase a dream and lose track of reality. Would really appreciate your thoughts, please ask me tp clarify anyting if you're not clear on whatever I stated in the post. Thank you for reading.
  2. This is how Green makes fun of Orange it’s comedic but also cynic. it shows what green values and focuses on: equality and showing women -even if by forcing it- must always be shown as adequate as men. Its like being in high school and making fun of your younger cousin who is still at elementary schools. https://youtu.be/-GeFM4Mco48
  3. so what do i do with this information ? How fo i integrated into my life ? I know that basically everyone is doing there best from there point of view, and there is nothing wrong with that, even though the mind would say “but they are hurting people!” Or “but they are killing and raping others”. Even if I know that god is doing these things because everything is a manifestation of god -who is good- What does that eventually means for me? I've seen Leo commenting like “of course, your in the bisuness of survival so of course that wouldnt be of benefit to you” or something like that, but i feel like this lacks nuance. If everything is good how come this good is not so apparent? How come rapest and criminals of war find it hard to sleep after going to war (some if them) and some has ptsd? is it ultimately just ego judgment thats preventing me from seen this truth? It just feels too odd to accept.
  4. Finished watching the episode. It’s very profound and beautiful as always. however; I still don’t understand how death killing or suffering is a manifestation of the goodness of life. It’s just too much to understand all at once or actually, I don’t understand it, but at least my mind is open to embrace it with small steps.
  5. @FlyingLotus thinks, this helps, I haven't watched the blog post yet but this will be very helpful for review afterwards. Thanks! @ted73104 I know this "fact", and In fact I live it everyday. however, integration is not a simple thing. even if you love and see the world as a whole as one, no one is going to believe you, and will question your intentions. in practice this feels like watching the world go by like you have no say in it and being afraid to talk your truth so that you wouldn't make any fuzz. @Leo Gura kindly Apologies, haven't watched the whole video and blog post yet. I'm not revolting against accepting this idea as much as wanting to know why do you say "Good". why not "just what it is" "empty phenomena" "just a thought reaction". I get a nihilistic the more I try to understand this.
  6. I have been talking to people and my life couch about leaving my family and starting a new life. The main problem is I'll have to work 2 jobs and be able to afford rent but may also live in a state where the majority of people are not highly conscious. I've been struggling with my family for quite a while, and I don't see that I have the level of respect I deserve living with them. I feel too scared to take this step but I feel like I'll be manipulated, mocked or made to tolerate behaviors and people out of my will if I don't. please help me out if you have any experience, my life couch would not let me consider this idea as they think it's "egoic thinking" so I stopped talking to them, but I hope I find help here.
  7. Lindsey lohan allegedly converting to Islam. I think this is a good example of going from stage red to blue. She's been known for bing a trouble maker, going in and out of jail and having been in a rehab many times. Adding fame to the mix and you get an inflated ego that's out of control. I think she sets a good example for moving form selfishness (Red) to a stage relatively on the selflessness side (Blue). for anyone who's confused about Kanye west embracing Christianity. notice how sillier his situation is to Lindsey's
  8. @Jacob Morres wanted to share my story with basically the same scenario but felt too self aware… its painful, sending loving compassion towards your way.
  9. Leo, you will love this: signed up for two of there course.both were deleted without me being able to access the content even thought they said it’ll be available for life. they advertise in a highly rushed style and “you wouldn’t get a better chance” “your life sucks and you would regret not signing up” also they put a timer on their website so that it will expire if you didn’t sign up quickly as “people can’t wait to join this, and we can only let a certain number of people so that we are not sharing with everyone and reveling our secrets” scammed me 900$ And wouldn’t refund even a day after. learned to just say no to anyone rushing me into something as a rule of life.
  10. @thisintegrated Hmm interesting, never looked at it this way before. I think I was thinking about it it this way: listen to higher stages as they can tell you what you don’t yet know. Stages below would just be butt-hurt and not understand your level of development. makes since actually. I actually do listen to lower stages some times and appreciate there points of view. Though Maybe I need to look at all criticism with more open mindedness for understanding there points of view and not be too judgmental.
  11. @thisintegrated not really, I don’t really care, I see my blind spots as having a green prospective ( some I don’t think I’m completely green tough idk). And I’m here to learn. I just feel like there are some Ive noticed who criticize green from below which is counter intuitive if there objective is to learn. I personally don’t mind a criticism from above since I know that being too hell-bent on protecting everyone and there emotions wouldn’t get us far.
  12. @Preety_India I think this is actually an advanced green forum. Though I haven’t been here long enough to know or to make a solid argument for it. it tends to be highly mind focused since Leo talk about stage yellow topics which are to the (majority of us) advanced and too heavy on the ego. Emotionally and intellectually. I know I sometimes wish Leo would be more emotional, his most emotional videos where my favorite and speaks to me (the ones I remember where the stages of life which was an awesome video). but you are right it’s not green. And some people here tend to misunderstand green ( but know what it is) which makes them criticize it from below and its a shame. green is respectable when you live among them, great pack, would support you emotionally and would defend your rights. I think less people talk about these facts and actually just follow what Leo says about green ( which is criticized from above and therefore makes his opinion actually valid and worth listening to)
  13. @Anastas Sia very interested to learn more about this, or if you have found others who have changed preferences like yourself. I knew friend who identified and dressed like a boy for the majority of her life, had relationships with girls too, and was sexually attracted to girls, said she didn't feel anything for guys. One day she told me she just woke up and found out that she likes guys now. I'm not sure how this happens so suddenly.
  14. @Leo Gura I still think that talking about the problem of lack would be a great idea, aside from this conversation. I think people don't care also because they don't know that this is possible. like how will I figure this out if the heroes I'm following are only talking about disasters that's going to wipe us off. and even systematic-thinking people don't bother to mention this often enough that there are workable solution. I've been following some stage yellow people and they only drop this knowledge on you so out of the blue because they are so detached I imaging like it's nothing "yeah we can solve this all ya know ? hooray! .. "
  15. @Leo Gura I think I have a video request: why the fuck is this not talked about as a possible solution! nuance: why is stage yellow's systematical-thinking not a thing > who benefits for keeping this a mere wishful thinking ? > where is the egotistical pushback coming from that make this not explained and taught at schools > why do we fall into the tarp of lack
  16. nuclear energy ? do you see this a solution in the coming years? or will it take longer than that? if it is, it might be better to study nuclear physics than environmental studies if this is actually workable and can generate lots of jobs.
  17. has anyone watched Mushishi ? I could be just guessing, but I think it has some turquoise in it.
  18. @Leo Gura just because we do listen to other teachers other than you ( as you recommend) who do you know that has equal amount of understanding or integrity same to you who wouldn’t lead us to become simply a part of their flock? Any spiritual teacher comes to mind? I’m really interested and not simply using this to doubt you.
  19. I believe this is the white man's purple :
  20. I found this video and I thought this was worth sharing, since we are about broadining our perspective and listening to different opinions, not to say this is the majority of MAGA supporters, but it's worth paying attention to the few who got some sense in them who do exist.
  21. @Leo Gura the way I see it, spiral dynamics model is more global and cultural, it's good for an alien to know what spiral dynamic is as a first model to help them understand humanity and the way people have evolved, in order for them to be more capable of finding the ones who they'd be safer to interact with. 9SED is more focused on egos, the way ego loses its attachments and find new ways of reflecting on itself and others. I find it more accurate when concerned with people's way of cognition rather than their world view. With enough experience and study one can start scanning for words such as "always" "everyone" for stage stage3, or equally develop a sense for how complex the target's speech and word choices are, enabling the observer to infer (or at least use elimination) to find the target's 9SED level.
  22. Hi, I was wondering if any one knows of a good resource for anyone who wants to develop a mentality of winning and being competitive. I'm seeing lately that having a good degree of wanting to be competitive is a good and healthy aspect of life if one doesn't obsess about it. I've noticed in my life that I'd often not care too much about winning as a goal. I used to play video games with friends, for example, but I'd be more interested in playing and having fun than being a good player. Which sometimes was not just being in a good spirit because id get angry or jealous if someone was playing better than me, and I can see that playing in subtle ways in other areas in my life, which makes me want to understand if that's a limiting belief issue. so how can one start being competitive and get into the mode of being a winner? note: if you there's a video by Leo that you recommend please link it, I haven't watched all his success videos.