Tristan12

Technically God is alone because it is everything and so it is singular and there is nothing outside of it. It doesn't mean it feels lonely, it just physically is alone. So I'd say Leo is right when he tells people they are alone but he should make sure they know that he means alone as God and as the Whole, not just alone as a single person, like what solipsism says

Ultimately self-love at a basic human level (not at a super-transcendent spiritual level) comes down to your relationship with your emotions. Your emotions are the core parts of yourself, so if you avoid and dismiss how you feel, you will not have a good relationship with yourself. Think of yourself as the parent and your emotions being a child, and then how you feel about and towards yourself is how your emotions feel about you based on the state they are in (if they are stuck in trauma) and also how you treat them (if you abandon them or be fully with them). Generally the main reason you would have a bad relationship with your emotions to begin with is because they were hurt and separated from you in childhood, and now they are stuck in that pain, and so your emotions are in a shamed and hurt state already (which you feel because they're your emotions) and then when you avoid or run away from your emotions it just makes it worse (you as the parent ignoring the hurt child) and that leads to spirals of shame, self-hate, etc. This is something that affirmations or rationalizing to yourself about won't fix, at least at the root, because this is strictly an emotional matter and about your relationship with your emotions. If you want to genuinely feel true love towards yourself and not have some fake bullshit cover up like what you mentioned in the beginning, this is what you need to focus on. Everything you feel is valid and there for a good reason. If you don't understand why you feel a certain way, it doesn't mean the emotion is invalid, it means you don't understand where it is coming from and you're not seeing the root of it. Therefor when you go against your negative emotions and treat them like an enemy, you are hurting yourself. What I would recommend you to do is start learning about emotions, childhood trauma, etc. so you can get an understanding of where your emotions are coming from and why you feel the way you do. Then you will start to develop empathy and understanding towards yourself, you will be more accepting of your difficult emotions and not push them away so much, and then that hurt child inside of you will feel a bit more loved and you will improve your relationship with yourself. Ultimately to heal completely and genuinely love yourself you will need to heal and process whatever blocked emotions you are holding within you. Without that, parts of you will always be hurt, you will always be stuck in a state of shame to some degree and you won't be able to have a very good relationship with yourself. Also, don't pressure or expect yourself to love in this state. It's not realistic for you right now. You are better off being more accepting and understanding of these hurt emotions you are feeling, not trying to force them to change or be loving and positive. Just doing that alone will improve your ability to love, counter-intuitively. Also, you can check out my youtube channel if you want a place to learn about this stuff. Good luck

Yes, generally people will to hurt others as a twisted way of getting their own needs met, which happens when they have been emotionally wounded, left with unmet needs and denied the love they need. Basically their needs weren't met the first time around so subconsciously they resort to more twisted and distorted ways of trying to make it happen. A person who has had their needs met in a healthy way and who has been given the love they needed throughout their life wouldn't be the type to actively try to hurt people. "Those who are hardest to love need it the most" - Socrates

"You're such a dork." or "They took you to school in the short bus, didn't they?" or just roll your eyes up at her. When a girl a being stupid, sometimes the best thing is just to say nothing and give her "the look". When all her friends come over: "Hey I didn't know the circus was in town!" This one kills me We should start a thread of witty lines and jokes so that people can pick and choose ones that they like to build up a collection of witty lines like you talked about in your how to get laid pt 3 video

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No, you don't have to let "the system" tell you how to help people. I 100%, wholeheartedly agree with this. If you want to help people as much as possible then use the alternative healing techniques that you find to be the most effective. Don't just be another product of the system. The techniques of standard therapy today barely help people compared to what's possible

I struggle with this too. Just like you said, I waste hours every day pacing back and fourth just thinking about things. My mind is obsessed with it and its so hard to get myself to stop. I have a lot of trauma and blocked emotions that I am trying to work through and heal and its extremely obvious to me that this is what is creating this obsessive day dreaming. Its common for the mind to become obsessed with thinking as a way of avoiding the difficult emotions that are trapped within you, because they make your normal present experience so uncomfortable Meditation has not solved this for me either, nor do I expect it to, at least any time soon. I've been meditating an hour a day for 2 years now and my thoughts still race like crazy. I know what I need is to heal my trauma and release my blocked emotions because that is the only thing that will solve this problem at the root

Is this like the faceless men from Game of Thrones? Where they say "a man has done this" rather than "I have done this", because they seek to become nobody

I've noticed my general level of awareness has gone up quite a bit. I find that a lot of the time I get into a meditative state during random day to day things whenever I get really focused, like if I am trying to pay close attention during a conversation, or if i'm working on something really intently. I also find that my memory has improved quite a bit and I learn things faster, probably just because of increased focus and awareness. I also find awakenings and mystical experiences happen a lot more frequently than they used to. I think the results I have gotten so far are decent but I expect them to pick up a lot more later. I went into meditation knowing that the first few years are generally slow and results pick up a lot more later on, and that sort of mentally prepared me to not expect too many results right away and to just focus on building the habit. Now I am entering my third year and I can feel my meditation getting deeper, so I think results should start to pick up more over the next few years. I remember before I started meditating, I heard Leo say that meditation should be the one habit you stick to in your life more than anything, and you should try to never miss a day no matter what, because of how important meditation is and also because meditation compounds on itself so its a bigger deal to miss a day of meditation than it is to miss a workout or something like that. I made a goal for myself to do that and to try my best to never miss a day, and so far I have done it. I started December 28 2019 and I haven't missed a day since. Even during the times I have gone on vacations to stay with friends or something, I still did it. I find that having a habit like that where I never miss a day, no matter what, has helped a lot for my discipline in other areas of life. I've tried to start meditating a few times before, but I would always end up stopping, but this time I was able to stick to it because of the level of commitment and dedication I had to it. I decided that this habit and the development that would come from it was too important for me to miss out on and I wanted to make it happen no matter what, so I committed myself to it 100% and that's what made it stick. That was also an important lesson for me, because I learned that that's how I need to be for developing anything else to my life. I need to be 100% committed to developing the habit no matter what, anything less than that and it probably won't work. By the way, I know Ethan too, we've talked a lot and he's helped me along my journey of meditation so far. That's cool that you follow his channel, his stuff is really great

@Breakingthewall I feel like that would traumatize him lol, it would be way too intense

Hey, good luck with the meditation habit, keep it up! I started meditating 2 years ago. I started with 20 minutes a day, then a month later went to 30 minutes, then 45 minutes, then an hour and i've been doing that every day since. After a few months doing an hour a day, it was easier than when I started with 20 minutes a day, so keep it up. The beginning is the hardest.

@Blackhawk In your situation I would only recommend taking psychedelics if its for healing trauma/emotional wounds, in which case something like a mushroom/MDMA combo would be better than just LSD, but even then, because of how psychedelics have been for you in the past, I would recommend trying to resolve your issues sober first and only taking psychedelics if you think absolutely necessary. Based on what you wrote its obvious that they are very risky for you so it wouldn't be smart for you to take them right now

Over the past few years I have become so passionate about spirituality, psychology and personal development, and at this point that is all I want to pursue and spend my time doing. Because of this I have lost interest in a lot of the other areas of life, including dating and relationships. I try to keep the other areas of my life balanced (I still exercise and take care of my health, I have friendships I maintain, I am working on my career, etc.) but dating and relationships is something that is not a part of my life and I don't have much interest in it becoming one. I can see the appeal in a deep romantic relationship, but still it's not something that I really want. For sex, if it fell in my lap I would take it but i'm not interested in it enough to go out and pursue it. I would rather focus on my work and the things i'm passionate about. The thing I am concerned about is that I have basically no experience in this area and I am wondering if it would be a hinderance to my development if it stayed that way. I'm 21 and I am a virgin and i've never been in a relationship. I know because I am young that I could definitely change my mind in the future, but i've already been this way for a few years and I'm just wondering if it would be a problem if I stayed this way. Even if I ended up having sex and getting into a relationship in the future, that still doesn't mean that i'd necessarily put in the time and effort to develop skills in that area, and i'd probably still be pretty underdeveloped. Do you think that the area of dating and relationships is something that is necessary for everyone to develop skill in whether they are interested in it or not? I'm curious to hear about this from people also deeply into spirituality who would understand why someone wouldn't be interested in this.

@The0Self I love that song. Its sooo nostalgic

@Gianna Can you recommend any books, videos or other resources on doing inner child work?

If you can't find it, just download it as an mp3 file and then you can listen to it

To me, what I love most about life and what makes life worth living, is Love itself. Spiritual, existential Love. I think after being through so much suffering in my life, I have become especially sensitive and receptive to Love, because it just means so much to me. At this point its all I really care about in life and all I want to pursue. I can't describe how good love makes me feel. I can't get over it's beauty and pure perfection, and I never will. It's more than just some pleasure or good feeling, its home, its the best thing possible, it's everything I've ever wanted and needed. I can't believe that something so good is possible, I just can't get over it. Love will always make life worth living no matter how much suffering you go through. I want to pursue Love endlessly till the day I die. THAT'S what I love about life.

I am not trying to counter what you're saying or get you to change what you believe, but from my view it seems that you are neck deep in shame from childhood that has not been resolved, and that is creating these beliefs you are holding. You really just need love deep down within you to be able to release that shame, and then you would think differently. That's just my opinion, but think what you want. Also, having a good childhood really doesn't tell you whether you were shamed or not, because shaming is usually not an obvious trauma but just an avoidance and dismissal of a child's emotions and needs, and that can happen so easily from parents who just don't know any better. It only needs to happen once for it to affect you. Wounding from shame also happens so early on that you wouldn't remember it.

There are lots of techniques out there for processing emotions from childhood but in my opinion most of them don't get to the root. My life purpose and my work is in psychology and the very thing I have been focusing on for the past 2 years is creating a process that heals childhood wounds at the deepest level to the point where they are resolved completely. The process I am creating would be the easiest and most direct root to this depth of healing (which is why I am creating it) but unfortunately I am not finished it yet. If you want you can follow my youtube channel where I post info on this stuff and will be posting my healing process once I am done: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC9vkQMt-MlvK9Xvnf-JiggQ Teal Swan has a book called "the completion process" that leads to this type of healing. Her process is lengthy and can be difficult, which is why I am working on creating a simpler one, but it still works, so that's an option for you. Also check out this video, it explains how core trauma works and the general idea of what needs to happen to heal it: This type of healing can also be done through psychedelics. If you're interested in that, check out the book "psychedelic psychotherapy" by R. Coleman. Until then, I would just focus on learning how to treat your emotions better (which I have videos on on my channel). You need to learn to treat your shame/unworthiness like a hurt child, that you empathize with and understand, rather than something that's against you that you feel you need to counter or correct. It will make it much easier to deal with. Hopefully this is helpful to you. If you still have trouble with this I would be happy to help you 1 on 1 once my healing process is done. I want to get practice walking people through it.

At the deepest level, all feelings of unworthiness come from unprocessed shame from childhood. It can be healed, through deep emotional processing. If you want to heal completely, and not just cover it up or feel better on the surface, nothing you tell yourself about how worthy you are and no reasoning you come up with as to why you don't have to feel unworthy will help, because the core issue is a blocked and unprocessed emotion, which cannot be resolved by trying to think or rationalize your way out of it. This emotion needs to be faced, felt through, processed and integrated. It just needs love.

It's not the exact same but its pretty close

@Karmadhi He means find and follow your life purpose. When you do work that you are really passionate about, you won't have problems with motivation. Leo always talks about how the key to a great work ethic is having a really strong vision that supplies you with a really deep level of intrinsic motivation. This vision needs to be based on something you're extremely passionate about, something that touches your heart and really lights you up inside. Watch some of Leo's motivational videos and think about what really excites you about life, or think about taking his life purpose course if you haven't already. Maximizing your passion and motivation is the key to maximizing your work ethic. Of course you also need to learn discipline too, because you won't always be motivated, but motivation is the main thing. Something else that I don't hear talked about much for work ethic are internal blocks, such as emotional issues, past traumas, etc.. When you hold emotional blockages and parts of you are stuck in hurt and distress, often not every part of you will be on board for working hard, and you will always be partly pulled towards some sort of instant gratification or pleasure to soothe your pain, but of course that ends up wasting your time. That's why its important to do emotional healing and spiritual work to resolve any internal blockages and get every part of you focused and on board with your work. Not sure if this kind of thing is a problem for you, but it has been for me so I just wanted to mention it. If you can come up with a vision that you are ridiculously passionate about and really fires you up inside, and you are able to apply yourself to it fully without being pulled away by any sorts of distractions, limitations, health issues, etc., you will not have a problem with motivation/work ethic

@Preety_India Yeah I see what you mean, and I get how this is a subjective matter and its up to me how I feel about it. The reason I wanted to ask others is because i've never been in a relationship before so I only really know how I feel about it from the outside looking in, so I wanted to get some insight from other people on the value relationships provide to their lives even while deeply pursuing spirituality or other things to see how they feel about it. It's just something to think about. Plus I am young so I want to hear other people's perspectives who are older and have gone through more of life, because I know your opinions on these kinds of matters can change a lot as you get older. I just want to hear from people who have potentially been in my position and hear how things worked out for them.

Thank you everyone, I feel like I have gained some insight into what I want to do about this. I don't think I will be missing out on much by not pursuing dating and relationships if I am genuinely not interested in it, which at this point I'm not. If I change my mind in the future and decide its something I want to pursue, then I will start working on it, but for now at least I can be confident that i'm not making a bad decision by avoiding this area of life as its something that just isn't that important to me

40 rules of love by Elif Shakaf Also any of Rumi's poems are really great