soos_mite_ah

Huh interesting. Idk I feel like I always see everyone doing pull ups and push ups as if it's easy and that's the first thing that you start off with. I remember growing up I would fail certain sections of fitness exams just because I can't do either one of those. It's one of the reasons (along with sucking at cardio) that convinced me that I was super unfit growing up lmao. Let's just say I've been having second thoughts lately lol. I can do about 70 lbs on lateral pulldowns and I weigh somewhere around 140 lbs. So yeah.... I got a bit to go. Can increasing weights for lateral pull downs help with doing pull ups? Do both of those exercises work similar muscles? As for chest press, I do dumbell chest presses with 25lbs on each hand (so 50lbs total but I'm not sure if you count it like that). And yeah, again, have quite a bit to go. Again, can increasing weights for chest presses help with the push ups? I can do push ups on my knees really well. I can do a few full body ones but form wise.... it isn't the best. It's basically being faily thin with just a little bit of muscle tone without looking bulky. So basically: Would you still lose calories this way or be challenged? Because part of the reason why I like lifting weights is seeing improvement in the form of being able to do more reps or more weights. Also, this is probably going to be a REALLY dumb question but would it be possible to lose muscle mass while still maintaining your strength? I always heard the opposite. I thought focussing on building more endurance as opposed to maximizing strength was the thing that made people more lean but not as big. Kind of how pilates focuses on muscle endurance and reps as opposed to adding more weights as you would do with weight lifting. Yeah.... I'm dealing with my own issues regarding focusing on and appreciating what my body is able to do rather than basing my worth on what it looks like and her comments really don't help. Like the other day I was talking to her about how I'm excited about how I finally managed to stay consistent with working out and I found things I enjoyed and she basically said it doesn't count unless I'm losing weight. She then went on to tell me that my arms and legs look and feel gross because of how hard they feel and because some of the muscles poke out a little and how I need to stop because I'm ruining my already big body. Again... I know what she's saying is absolute bs, but it does get to me a lot tbh since my weight/size is something she's been scolding me on since I was a child becase of her own insecurities. Thanks, I'll check that out.

Also another question: What's the deal with rest days and why can I lift more despite not working out for 3 weeks? I got sick earlier this month for 2 weeks and I has my period for another week. I didnt work out for those 3 weeks. When I returned to the gym, I noticed I can do heavier weights and more reps. How did that happen lol?

It's that time of the year again

No I haven't but I have found plenty of sources online as well as the direct experiences of the people I know in my life to guide me through this to where I get the over all premise of the concept.

Ngl, I do every now and then go through phases of pessimissim because everything is expensive, wages have been stagnant, the world is slowly melting, there is a pandemic happening outside, and of course, right wing political extremism. Sometimes it's just like... welp tf do I have to look forward to? What am I working towards if nothing is promised or guranteed? I often feel burnt out by the way I have been working on things academically and professionally because I don't have that much time to myself. Even though I am working hard, there is a part of me that is afraid that it won't pay off and that I'm just going to be a wage slave anyway. Worst of all, becoming a wage slave at a dead end job with a decent salary that can have you affording basic shit that won't overwork you is the best case scenario compared to shit like the gig economy and having 5 side hustles to the point where you have monetized anything and everything that brings you joy just to make ends meet. And don't even get me started on having kids. Personal reasons aside, I don't want to raise kids in a world like this. My peers and I sometimes joke about making plans with this notion of if there will even be a future because in roughly 10 years or so, climate change is going to get REALLY bad. It would be along the lines of "well when I'm in my 30 *insert thing to do in your 30s* that is if there is even going to be an Earth then lmaooo." And even though it is a joke, there is this part that is actually serious in the sense of again... what do we have to look foward to?? These jokes were made prepandemic btw so shit has gotten worse since then.

He tried to fuel a culture war and instead ended up announcing to millions of people that he sucks in bed and can't get his wife wet

So basically, I'm really done with overthinking, analyzing, and modelling and I find myself just wanting to be and not do much a lot of the time. I feel like part of this has to do with me being bombarded with information to where I'm just done at this point and this is my way of mentally checking out or dissassociating in a minor way. But could this also be a symptom of me getting over my over thinking/ analyzing and, well not to sound pretentious, "transcending the mind"? I wrote about this much more in my journal: And to me, I would characterize my "head empty, no thoughts* era as one where I stop ruminating about things and just let myself be in the present moment. It's also about me making the conscious decision to not stress or overthink and overanalyze things because at some point, it doesn't produce anymore insights rather it just becomes a marathon of mental gymnastics that leaves you exhausted mentally and emotionally. And at this point, I would say it's fairly easy for me to meditate for a lengthy amount of time and see it something that is purely restful rather than something that I need to work at. If anything, I need those *head empty, no thoughts* part of my day to function as a person lol. I don't think I have "transcended the mind." I wouldn't dare say that I have dealt with the issues that come with stage yellow sufficiently enough to be beyond that stage. Part of me wonders if I am actually dealing with this or if this is a response to me being mentally exhausted by the stuff going on in the world and just being a university student who is ready to graduate instead of being surrounded by information 24/7. I will say that being at stage green/yellow through my college years has caused me to take in a lot academically and find a lot of fulfillment in being a student. I feel like if I was at any other shade of the other stages or if I came to college prematurely that it just wouldn't hit in the same way. Another part of me wonders if this is me hitting some type of stage yellow wall that is coinciding well with me transitioning into life after college. I guess only time can tell and that I graduate and go into this next stage of my life to see if this is manifesting in a healthy way or if this is just me dissassociating from information overload. Because tbh, when I think of emptying my mind and how I sometimes feel when I do it, I feel like this clip from Spongebob and I highly doubt that's highly consicous stage turquoise lol. https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/VideoExamples/MentalWorld#video-link

@puporing I'm with you on that which is why I'm trying to do as much as I can on my own and using psychedelics as a last resort. I can attest to that claim with my personal experiences with self development work. TBH, I have a nice dose of skepticism when it comes to psychedelics. Mainly because I don't think it's wise to start taking any substances, specifically drugs, from the instruction of the internet or some talking head on YouTube. Also, under the wrong circumstances, psychedelics can really fuck you up which is why I personally don't think it's wise to get into it until you're in your mid to late 20s at the earliest (and obviously take every precaustion you can take and mentally prepare in advance). I mean, there is pleanty of work and development that is to be done before those years and you can make pretty good substantial progress. Plus I think getting into it too early can cause people to use it as a quick fix instead of building up your skills in things like reflection, self awareness, being practical, etc. There are plenty of people who still have their work cut out for them despite having an awakening or two.

I think a huge problem with stages such as Yellow and Turquoise is because since they aren't very mainstream and the framework for those stages are still being created, you don't see a variety of examples in casual settings. For example, with stage Orange, as a society we had to put in the framework for it through things like different scientific discoveries and the intellectual philosophies of the enlightenment era. WIthout that framework, the Kardashians for instance would probably be burnt at the stake or won't exist all together. But just because you're Orange, it doesn't mean you're going to be Steven Hawking Orange, rather you could Tai Lopez Orange What I mean by that is that you need to have the complex stuff in a stage come first before it gets integrated into society to where it becomes mainstream enough to have variations within the stages and to where you see the stage in a more casual setting. I think Green is also a good example of this because you don't have to be a full on hippy to be substantially Green. I know plenty of Green people who don't particulary resonate with that particular crowd because they see holes in their logic or they just express their Green energy differently but they still do have similar vibes. For example. most of my friends are pretty Green but aren't full on hippies because they have a well integrated stage Orange and because they simply have other ways of expressing the same values (like opting for expanding their emotional awareness and acceptance in therapy instead of a heart chakra meditation for instance without discrediting the later. Or by seeing the holes in the logic of some anti vaxx spiritual people while still seeing the vaildity their teachings/ values). With Yellow and Turquoise on the other hand, the different variations haven't formed just yet and I think a lot of the mysticism is the intellectual framework we are still navigating. Maybe there will be a time (in a few hundred years, not anytime soon lol) when delving into psychedelics and hours of contemplation won't be necessary because Turquoise is mainstream and it's the default. Maybe there will be a time where you can just be a stage Turquoise himbo and just live your best life. I think it can be beneficial to think about what Turquoise can look like without the path to mysticism but at the same time, that path at the moment is largely necessay because again... need to establish the framework.

100% agree with all of this. I honestly didn't mean for it to come off as particularly negative. I was intending to illustrate on how the notion that "no one will understand me" doesn't carry the typical negative charge that most people associate it with rather for me the notion carries a neutral connotation as far as my experiences go. That said, there isn't anything wrong with being frustrated with this type of thing. It's just part of the process sometimes. I really like this. In my original journal post, I did write about how I was taking a step back from spirituality and how that as a result caused me to step back from SD and create goals for myself independent of it. I think it was very beneficial for me and it has helped me ground myself in the questions you explained aove. And I just want to acknowledge that. That's valid and I can see how that would work. I suppose my lack of psychedelic experience does contribute to me only scratching the very surface of transcending different mental models. However, I did mention in a previous comment that this is something that I'm not quite ready to try just yet.

Just watched this episode and I honestly feel like it made me reflect on all of the bullets I dodged over the last 4ish years and how cautious I actually tend to be.

@Carl-Richard I really appreciate your comment and I think there is a lot of good stuff there. So basically from what I'm gathering is that Turquoise isn't necessarily Yellow + mysticism. Instead Turquoise is more of an applied Yellow that may or may not encorporate mysticism. Does that sound right? I guess I don't really see myself past Yellow and in Turquoise because I don't particularly see myself dipping into mysticism just yet. I will say that I did have that conception of Turquoise just being a more mystical Yellow where everything gets dismantled. But then again, even when I was in stage green where people tend to jump to the hippy dippy stuff, sure I was intrigued by that stuff, but I wasn't super woo woo. I feel like I was more of the progressive, social sciency type instead. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I didn't find myself being super spiritual when I was getting into Green from Orange but I did see myself getting into it a little bit. And I wonder what that would look like going forward in the next stages when I'm going Yellow to Turquoise and if there would be any parallels given my general tendencies. I think that would be a good action item to look into. Personally, I'm not ready for psychedelics just yet. Gotta let that frontal lobe develop first lol. But a meditation retreat is definitely on my to do list and I don't think it would hurt to look into a few teachers here and there to see what resonates. I feel like I'm already there. I don't feel so angsty about people not understanding me rather it's more along the lines of "we're in different places in our lives and we've had different experiences and that is perfectly ok because no one can truly understand anyone without embodiment." But at the same time, it is said that the higher stages include and transcend the lower stages. For instance, even if you aren't at for example stage red, you can still empathize with them on their human experience without acting in the same way. I find myself in that position a lot where it isn't difficult for me to relate or empathize with people so as a result, the lonliness that is associating with nO oNE unDeRStanDS isn't really there. I feel like a lot of the framework and values I have for a good spiritual life (and life in general) is already there and I'm just at a point where I need to step into it and embody it going forward. I do find myself questioning things from the quality of my direct experiences and sources a lot as well but I do think that it's just the tip of the ice berg and isn't in the scale of **lets go and dismantle the concept of space and time.** I feel like I've been in somewhere in Yellow for the past 4 years now, whether it is late Green/ early Yellow, or plain Yellow mixed in with other shadows from previous stages. As a result, I've been focusing a lot of my attention on dealing with a lot of those shadows so I could be a healthier, more solid version of Yellow. Then again, I could really benefit more on just diving into Yellow more instead of merely dealing with the stuff that is covering it up if that makes sense. Goes back to what @Zigzag Idiot had to say.

SD aside, I feel like building a quality social circle has to do with making yourself into a quality person, sharing that with people, and then keeping the people you resonate with around. Personally, I am a firm believer that in many cases, messy people tend to attract messy people because messy people don't have standards for themselves or other people and are willing to go whereever they are tolerated. If you have firm boundaries, a sense of purpose, and are consistently working on yourself to become more self aware, messy people like that simply won't stick around or if you do encounter them, you simply won't resonate or click with them. I know a lot of messy people in my life. I don't particularly dislike them or anything from the get go nor did I pick up on really bad vibes, but we never clicked in that way so as a result, I never got caught up in their drama and shenanigans. I mean, just think about the way you relate to people, what you talk to them about, how you go about talking about different things, and the overall dynamics you find yourself if. I would say working on those things and reflecting on that would be a good place to start because that's how a lot of people tend to exuberate their values and show people where they are at. Other than that, I would also suggest having and open mind and talking to a variety of different people. Let's be real, you're probably not going to hit it off with like 90% of them regardless of where you may be mentally but you don't need to please everyone. Just find the handful of people you click with, nurture those relationships, and next thing you know, BAM you have a quality social circle. To make that social circle into a group of friends. I cannot stress this enough but both of yall need to be consistent in making plans with each other so yall can get to know each other and deepen the bond. Unless you're still in school, this is going to be something that can make or break you since people have busy lives and conflicting schedules. Prioritize people in your life and prioritize maintaining relationships. And in many cases, I quite literally mean schedule out time for this type of thing.

Kardashain Memes I Associate with Sections on this Forum So after taking a break from this forum, I feel like I have a clearer mind. I also feel like sometimes we all take this place and our journey to be more conscious a little too seriously at times to where it sometimes gets in the way of relatability. Plus I just like memes lol. Self Actualization: Dead ass, I feel like I started realizing shit in 2016 and I haven't stopped since lol Meditation, Consciousness, Enlightenment, Spirituality: Life Purpose, Career, Entrepreneurship: Dating, Relationships, and Sexuality: Health, Fitness, Nutrition: Serious Emotional Problems:

Granted this is the only forum I'm really on but I will say that I feel like I'm pretty cool with the mods here and that they usually have well balanced interactions. I know one of my friends irl who has been on a variety of internet forums and is a mod in many of them and this person has shared me stories about what somethings they have to put up with behind the scenes which I found intriguing. This is also a person who I considered well balanced and takes well thought out action so as a result, I suppose from my positive experiences with mods on and offline that I do have a good image of them. I think depending on who is chosing the mods and what forums you're on, the quality of mods can vary but generally speaking, there is a reason why some people are mods and why some aren't and it's perfectly understandable to have some form of regulation on a forum.

Spiral Check April 2022 So I decided to revist where I might be on the spiral since it's been a minute, I don't have much inspiration to write but I want to write anyway, and because why tf not. I took the things that I still had left over since I have last written about the topic and deleted the excess stuff that I feel doesn't resonate with me anymore for the sake of clarity and conciseness. I will say, I have my doubts on how much I have progressed, not as an individual since I do feel like I have grown considerably in the last 6 months or so, but in terms of SD. I suppose a lot of it has to do with both me taking a step back from spirituality as well as me not actively using SD as a model, therefore I'm taking a more passive *let me just ease into the stages naturally* approach rather than a more active place where I look at how I need to grow according to spiral dynamics and having that map out my growth. Tbh, I have had other things on my plate that I don't think that SD cleanly aligns with. And that's okay. And to me, I would characterize my "head empty, no thoughts* era as one where I stop ruminating about things and just let myself be in the present moment. It's also about me making the conscious decision to not stress or overthink and overanalyze things because at some point, it doesn't produce anymore insights rather it just becomes a marathon of mental gymnastics that leaves you exhausted mentally and emotionally. And at this point, I would say it's fairly easy for me to meditate for a lengthy amount of time and see it something that is purely restful rather than something that I need to work at. If anything, I need those *head empty, no thoughts* part of my day to function as a person lol. I don't think I have "transcended the mind." I wouldn't dare say that I have dealt with the issues that come with stage yellow sufficiently enough to be beyond that stage. Part of me wonders if I am actually dealing with this or if this is a response to me being mentally exhausted by the stuff going on in the world and just being a university student who is ready to graduate instead of being surrounded by information 24/7. I will say that being at stage green/yellow through my college years has caused me to take in a lot academically and find a lot of fulfillment in being a student. I feel like if I was at any other shade of the other stages or if I came to college prematurely that it just wouldn't hit in the same way. Another part of me wonders if this is me hitting some type of stage yellow wall that is coinciding well with me transitioning into life after college. I guess only time can tell and that I graduate and go into this next stage of my life to see if this is manifesting in a healthy way or if this is just me dissassociating from information overload. Because tbh, when I think of emptying my mind and how I sometimes feel when I do it, I feel like this clip from Spongebob and I highly doubt that's highly consicous stage turquoise lol. https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/VideoExamples/MentalWorld#video-link Can invent futuristic solutions that aren't pragmatic. Looks good on paper but can't actualize (1:40:18). Can't finish something because they have so many ideas and visions (1:40:34) September 2021: I need to really commit to a life purpose and address my ADHD. That's a whole thing on it's own that I plan to work through once I get out of this depressing/ self loathing slump. April 2022: Again, since I'm in my *head empty, no thoughts* era, I can't really say I'm at a place where I am inventing futuristic solutions. I still feel like I have a lot to learn as far as things like work experience and life experience goes before I can reach the expertise to do something like that. I don't think this has to do with a lack of commitment to my purpose or issues with my ADHD now that I'm no longer in the same depressing/self loathing slump I was at a few months ago.

@mojsterr already happened. It was Sonia Sotomayor We haven't had an Asian person in the Supreme court though

Also, on a lighter note, this reminded me of something: Just watch the part from 3:04-3:18 lmaoooo

A lot of spiritual practices have historically prohibited women from participating or saw spirituality as mainly a male only thing because of this notion that men are the only ones who are concious and rational. And while that has been a significant amount of progress over the years, I'm sure that the legacy of that history still continues in the form of notions such as "we can't trust women, they are hysterical."

It's good that he can reflect on it but at the same time did he address how exactly he is trying to heal/ deal with this issue? if not, it's probably more of an excuse than a reason. And ngl, the whole iT'S toO mUCh PrEsSUre feels like a classic fuckboy line.

@trenton I mean, it's an indication and by product of progress but at the same time it isn't the progress itself. Still, it's worth celebrating but it's important to acknowledge that this by no means indicates that something like racism is over because it is more symbolic than anything.

Doing something like this intentionally or him not caring is basically the same thing There are a lot of people who apologize not because they are actually sorry or feel bad about hurting you or the situation, but because they feel bad about how this is affecting their self image. In other words, some people apologize not to take accountability but to simply not feel like the bad guy in the situation and have someone validate that. My question is, to what extent did this person do and show any amount of self reflection in this situation? Did he just say sorry or did he go into why he did what he did and how he resolved his issues? If it's the former, I wouldn't take it at face value. I need assurance that this person knows what they did wrong and what measures they have taken to deal with that issue so it doesn't repeat again (i.e. maybe he was pulling this shit because he was insecure and didn't know how to communicate so now he corrected that by doing x, y, and z and he knows how to take preventative measures because he knows himself better). Apologies don't mean much if the person does not change their behavior. If they apologize and they keep doing what they are doing, that's not an apology, that's just manipulation.

I'm in this video and i don't like it.

If she's lying about having a boyfriend, that's still a "no I'm not interested" which means you should leave her alone.