Thought Art

Member
  • Content count

    12,492
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Thought Art

  1. Also, just so y’all know: it was reading books I taught myself music theory and song writing and the art of social interaction that I used to get myself on 2 festival stages and an massive stage in front of 500 people. Your not a statistic but if your paper thin epistemology and victim mindset is gonna stop you then that’s fine. I faced fear, pushed hard and I do speed read and have a high level of reading comprehension. I also made sure in my early 20’s to make study on life long learning and I’m actively building my infrastructure for teaching myself the rest of my life. reading books also got me hired as a Systems Policy Officer at a non-profit. I ended up leaving recently and I’ve been focused on turning into my spirit and doing a deeper working on my spiritual development as being a spiritual developed and integral person is important for my music brand. Engramn is my name. Folks, reading books is not the same as emotional mastery. This work of life purpose and creating our own paths comes from the heart and sometimes despite reading, we have emotional lows and downs and attachments. I have more emotional growth, and spiritual purification needed. I’m not afraid I can’t make money but, my consciousness is sacred and I’m resisting surrendering it others while I’m out here visioning and planning and reading. I will get whatever I want in life because I’m a genius and I work my ass off. So can you. So are you. I also know I have a short amount of time on earth. My vision is beautiful and if I pull it off it’s gonna mean a lot to a lot of people. I’m meant to do this. To follow my heart and increase consciousness of others with my music. As many artists have done for me I will do. “Light a candle for the kids jesus Christ don’t keep it hid” - arcadefire and , also it’s relative. Maybe it’s not music in the end. There’s a reason I resonate with Leo’s work because I’m an integral thinker who is passionate about consciousness, purpose and humanity.
  2. Thanks Everyone for your guidance on this. I’m feeling better! I am finding clarity. all my life I’ve had these dips. Usually after them good things come that I never could have expected. You all mean the word to me. Leo you know I love you! Thanks Everyone.
  3. @Leo Gura Thank you Leo. I have a long time horizon I just get discouraged and confused. This whole thread started by the realization and caution of my self deceptions. fuck, I’ve only got one life. My life purpose is making deep insights beautiful to ignite the spirit of humanity to self actualize. As of right now, being a professional musician seems intangible. It seems impossible and I feel frustrated. I have a lot of fear, and mental walls creating inhibition in some contexts where I could take action. What could I do today, that is a direct action that can help me find clarity? I’m not interesting in spending much more time in this apathetic state. This low I’m in... it’s challenging. I want to serve God and Humanity. My love burns so bright and sometimes the weight of everything is too much. Arcadefire is my hero... the song Intervention saved my life... ”the kings taken back the throne the useless seed is sown when they say their cutting off the phone, I’m tell em your not home... hear the soldier grown we’ll go it alone!”
  4. @AlwaysBeNice Yeah idk. I love reading and learning. I’m a polymath.
  5. @Leo Gura Leo, no one is making it as a musician around me. Even the most successful people in my province... even they they make 400,000+ in gross revenue they themselves are pocketing about 30,000. I’ve watched your videos, I’ve put in the work, played festivals, etc. I feel suicidal about it because it matters to me and part of me is dying. But, I’m not seeing how I’m going to make money. Another life coach totally shit all over me when I told her this is what I wanted (I bailed on her afterwards, but she had a point). I’m a hard working person. I’ve worked my ass over the past few years. Mastering my craft, reading books, fucking putting myself out there and facing huge amounts of fear, working through limiting beliefs. I also did the entire life purpose course and I study self learning. I don’t believe you that I can make money from music. At least not this year, or in the next few years. God, I’m praying to you to send me a sign and show me you haven’t been wasting my time with these songs and visions. Maybe I’m just crazy. But, I thought God was writing the songs and I was the mouthpiece.
  6. @AlwaysBeNice Thank You, I want to impact the world. I want to free my consciousness. I’m going through a mixture of ego backlash and uncertainty. I’m not convinced God is gonna help me other than me helping myself. Like, some of these books on metaphysics etc... if they are only for people who are financially free to read them maybe it’s just imaginative masterbation. Am I just Deceiving myself thinking God is leading the way, and that books like Course In Miracles is really somehow magic? doing 5meodmt I thought everything In reality was going to change, or for me to no longer be attached or confused. But, I feel more confused and attached then ever. 5meodmt is not going to liberate you. Having enough money to sit around reading and being an artist will.
  7. @Leo Gura @danniviemaria This is disappointing. I wanted to be a musician but, ahah that’s not pragmatic. That’s what really came up in the life purpose course. That an making YouTube videos about personal growth.... or reviewing all these new devices that are coming out.not very creative I guess.... no way to make money sadly. I want to make value for the world. I’m not just reading spiritual books but some more practical business books too. I just don’t want to be mediocre. I don’t have a degree and I’m 24. I’m not sure I want to stay in this body or this reality. I’m disappointed with reality today. And myself.
  8. @Leo Gura Honestly I don’t know anything. currently feeling dissatisfied with myself, my life purpose and spirituality. I don’t know where to go, who to trust, what to do with my life. I thought the book truth vs falsehood actually was based on something tangible. Now I don’t know anything. God isn’t helping is he.... and I’m just projecting meaning onto events etc.... I’m not special. Honestly, why bother keep on living if I can’t make it as a musician? Being a sage? How is that tangible in this reality...I’m reading all these books, but I still don’t know how I’m going to make a living. I don’t know anything. You say it’s a love simulator, perhaps it is. But, I am not sure I am interested in playing it anymore. God seems to have given me a dream in which I cannot fulfill. I feel like an idiot.
  9. Personally, I think psychedelics are becoming mainstream. With that I think our laws will change soon. Just give it time. 99% of history and human interaction took place before the interenet. People shake their asses in from of their friends on Facebook and people openly talk about these substances yet are still safe.
  10. @communitybuilder Maybe find committed self actualizers (like me) and house me for a year so I can experiment and go deep on 5meodmt and we can make a great documentary about it!
  11. @Rilles you’re making me wet! Ahahah it would be rooted in some mixture of absolute love and practicality perhaps hmm, reminder back to ‘not knowing’
  12. @Leo Gura Except, Hawkins models seems rooted in a strong truth. So maybe in some contexts my assholes tightness has truth to it. As God, I think it’s time we come home...
  13. @allislove it’s more an issue of authority and overall truth seeking. I know how easily self deceived we are. Leo seems to have moved mountains in my life. But, idk maybe I’m assbackwards wrong somehow. Probably am, mostly still. Maybe.
  14. @Leo Gura Makes Sense. So many layers to this puzzle.
  15. @Leo Gura Okay. I personally won’t use the test.... but his epistemology and teachings seem heavily rooted in its use. I’m not sure where the sloppiness lies. You are Jared.
  16. @Leo Gura I’ll burn in this fire of, being pumped by this author and then very annoyed at the two of you Haha i want something that maybe is implicit to my direct experience. I want to know if this is wasting my time, and if I am reading this person am I endangering my own epistemology...
  17. @Leo Gura I want the books I read to catapult me forward with my growth. Very interested in mass awakenings and mass movements
  18. @Leo Gura Yeah, so far that seems obvious to me. But Leo, the entire basis of the calibration IS the muscle response test. He clearly is very educated and enlightened. Transcending the levels of consciousness really resonates with me. But, he also claims our our muscle act as a truth thermometer ?. (Ive been diving deep into 5meodmt. I’m reading the book list as well as my own books. So many awakenings.) I am here to know. To see and to be the eyes of the planet. Not ego and belief. So strangely , clearly I cant throw out the muscle test all together. Though Something isn’t adding up. If someone is so smart and developed how can they themselves put so much ‘faith’ into a practice which even laymen would laugh at? Or perhaps this is because I calibrate under 200... But also, he now becomes someone in which I may read but not openly recommend.
  19. @Leo Gura I missed this one, just came across the post. Like I said, in the future!
  20. @Leo Gura ? that’s that Nevada witch bias I see
  21. @Leo Gura Thanks... Why have it on the book list? and, is it worth my time reading? I want the truth, not some bold guy who things his arm tells him the truth. Yet, the scale resonates with me and it seems to have congruence with the world value survey, maslows hierarchy of needs, spiral dynamics...
  22. Dang, I’ll be a great mod in the future.
  23. @Leo Gura I am afraid of love. But, with your teachings and radical action, I am claiming my temple to sit on my thrown. Love, is so multi-dimensional I think. To fully integrate it would be impossible without things like 5Meo and LSD. Also, Art and life long learning in the information Age. I've had soooo many awakenings. Not just with 5MeoDMT but, 5MeoDipt (Vision Quest... Amazing...Shamanic..) and 5MeoMiPT (Awakening of a wild love (Thick Face Black Heart Love for myself and others). 5MeoDMT is a catalyst for me so far. Amazing. I blew through a tonne of it. God is Good! Death is Good! and Life Purpose is good! (Leo, I had this moment where I was like... OHHHH I AMMM Leo Gura!! ahaha and now I know it) (The Leo Guuuuuuuuura) Counterintuitive though, because in the same process of awakenings I felt deep deep gratitude for Leos Teachings, but also a deep understanding that I created Leo to wake myself up. (not being attached to any belief here) And I am in the process of rapidly becoming a sovereign being and fountain of love!
  24. It's Love! I was so afraid of 5meo... but after low doses it's just great. Meditation on steriods.
  25. What is the most often you are doing 5meodmt? Is it dangerous if done frequently in low doses?