StarStruck

If aliens are at earth and they have that kind of technology they probably also have technology to disguise as humans. Perhaps Leo is one of them.

Become aware of the obstacle and let it go.

Emotional ventilation is something good. Normally I would crop up these frustration which is not good. I notice my inner child versus adult dynamic. They are constantly in conflict and it is not great. They need to find a resolution. My inner parent needs to realize it can't push the inner child with force, only convince it with love, respect and reason. And my inner child needs to realize it needs to grow up and integrate for the greater good of the self. My inner parent is definitely the problem though.

Today I was really busy. I could only get out to get some Thai food. I did two approaches. One had a bf but she was like 30 and meh. Even if she was single there was no attraction. I need to work on that. The other one was a cute girl with glasses. The moment she smelled the niceness she scooted off "I have to catch up with my gfs". All hot girls are my coaches Seriously, I can really can get triggered by women who say men are trash etc when the same women reject nice guys. I do get their position. I'm not a knuckle head but by rejecting nice guys you make nice guys like those guys you hate but allow to fuck your brains out. I already have a hot blonde girl waiting for me who wants to meet up this week so I don't have the same convulsive attitude towards pickup as in the beginning of my journey. It gave a more relaxed attitude. My objective is to create abundance in my life. A man with such a mindset is attractive. I do get women. My frustration is not even aimed at them. I'm a little bit confused. Where should I aim my frustration at? Exposure therapy by hot women Every hot woman that I approach I see as my coach. A coach that is teaching me how I can fuck them. They will sculp me in a way, with every rejection, in an exposure therapy kind of way and I will become somebody who they will want to fuck. Is there toxicity inside of me? Yes. Most women lie and cheat. Say they have bfs went they don't have bfs. Don't give me the light of day. Treat me as trash when I'm super nice. By God I will break some hearts and break something else... And I'm not even doing it for them. First and foremost. I'm doing it for myself. This exposure therapy will have a burden on my heart. When you get rejected by so many women, it is hard not to take it personal. I will become my alter ego to transcend my ego. At the end I will need to incorporate both niceness and assholeness. That is what I'm trying to say. Wankerness I had this insight today. Having this overly niceness and approaching ladies is similar to pulling your dick out and just wanking it in front of her. If she doesn't like that sight she will scoot off. If she likes the sight of that she might look at it, giggle and perhaps even help you! If you are a hot guy, niceness might work out for you. Or if you are lucky and a girl likes you at first sight it might work. In general it won't work. On this planet that strategy doesn't work. And it is really hard for me to get it out of my system. I just need to get rejected enough times so there is enough emotional labor for me to change myself. Nicing myself into a girl wants is not a winning strategy!! Getting lucky with blondie So blondie has hit me up again. I told her I can only meet up over 2 days. She can't really wait. I was really lucky to meet her. It was my luck she instantly liked my looks and vibe. She was also not turned off by my niceness. Girls like these are really rare.

People don't chose their childhoods and their kinks so it is not very empathetic to talk about it like that. Personally I really love to put the fear of god into a girl in bed. As long as both parties enjoy it I don't see a problem.

Because of recent frustrations I"m going to implement some radical steps. I'm going to 2x these variables in my life! Meditation Physical exercise: gym Engaging in lusty pleasures other than cheap pleasures: healthy foods Life affirming creativity: engaging in the physical world And also do some low-investment approaches. Also going monk mode: My mindset changes: Focusing on 1% change per day and being future orientated Going to cause of shit and not dealing with surface effects Involving coaches with the shit I'm struggle-ling; not being an emotional black box I feel like a transcended my addiction but I want to reboot quicker. This blonde is waiting for me. I can't wait for weeks.

I love stainless steal for frying steak and simple foods but I notice that if I make complex dishes like mexican food, the food sticks on the pan and it burns. Burned food is not healthy. Just buy good quality teflon pans and don't use them more than 1 year. After one year throw them out and buy a new one if your health is more worth than 30-60 euro per year. Recently I bought high quality teflon pans with 50% price cut. They are amazing.

So I experimented with these two modes. Niceness = wanting something from her, through being nice Arrogant = not wanting something but just expressing your manhood Women can be really mean towards a nice guy, not give him the light of day, or just be outright rude or treat you like dirt. Of course not all women, there is also a category of women that are nice to you (if you are a nice guy) and then just bounce off when they are done with you, tell you they have a bf, in a hurry or something. Am I making the right observations here? I don't get why women on this forum and elsewhere keep telling men to be nice. It really doesn't work. Especially with day game it doesn't work. Perhaps for social game or women that are looking for a beta provider guy it might work. Most guys aren't bad. They are just too nice. They need to drop the bs and just be raging dicks but the key is this: be a raging dick in passive mode, not active mode. It is a way of being, not a way of doing!!! Of course this topic is about about ATTRACTION phase of seduction. There is also a VIBING phase where it is important to emotionally connect to her. Vibing is a later stage, first you need to get a chance with her to be able to vibe. The thing is: when I'm nice with women, they cringe and don't give me a chance. When I'm a dick, they get attracted and they talk to me. I can clearly see signs of interests when I'm a dick (in a passive calibrated way!). Do you think it has to do with me or with women in general?

Today I didn't go out to pickup. I went to the supermarket. I had female eyes on me a couple of times. Perhaps it is the warm weather and hormones. Perhaps it is my energy that is different. I had one clear opportunity to approach. She saw me creeping up (I was walking faster to catch up with her), when she saw me in her peripherals I stopped. Next time I won't and just push through. #fuckit

That is why I love calling girls who ghost me. My anti-fragility is developing but I guess I need to take more action. I'm already doing steady 10-20 approaches per week but I tend to stick to what works. I'm doing Todd's "System" right now. He says rapport and attraction is not black and white and they overflow but you might have point here. I tend to switch to rapport building as soon as possible. Thanks, I will watch that movie. My problem is this I think: micromanaging my niceness/assholeness. I will try to let go of control (for couple of weeks) and let things grow organically and see what unfolds.

I wish but thanks. Still have to reach abundance. My journal is raw and uncensored. I'm glad you liked it. Yes, learn from others. That will cut your learning curve. I like this post of yours. Does it work? -------------------------------------------------------------- I made a thread about my recent findings My conclusions are these: My personality is not static, one day I can be overly nice, the other day just non-caring and straight forward and another day I can be something else It is important to be mindful of my personality profile on that day For example if I'm doing my approach and I feel like I'm overly nice; the moment I'm noticing that, be the exact opposite of being nice to create a counter balance The point is the find the opposite polarity of your personality and start being that, unite the polarity of your personalities and transcend the polarity is the lesson! For example, I'm a codependent, for me it is key to become more of a narcissist -------------------------------------------------------------- The girl that is interested in me looks like her. I'm posting this as inspiration for myself and others. She is hitting me up all the time. You guys might say "you are a lucky guy". I'm not. I'm doing nofap and that gave me a flat line. Girl wants to be nailed by me and I can't even get it up because of my porn induced addiction to porn and messed up dopamine system. My porn addiction (that was a result of my traumatic youth) is still hunting me. If I didn't have a traumatic youth, I would be with her right now. I'm never going to watch porn again! For me porn symbolizes what alcohol symbolizes for a alcohol addict. It screwed me up. Currently I'm very frustrated. I'm fighting an inner jihad.

It is very hard to remove this niceness, politeness and overly-considering nature out my psyche. Do you have any pointers how to permanently change this aspect of my personality? I don't know what the source of this niceness is. It is hard to pinpoint. That is what I did and I just wanted to cross reference my experience. I also want to help other people on this forum by making this thread. I made a journal about my pickup where I'm sharing commentary. She will cringe from you and not give you a chance if you are weak, so good luck building that emotional connection.

@Preety_India what do you think about being like this dickhead but being more balanced? Probably even more. Reality is a strange loop.

She (blonde girl with whom I had an instant date in the park) is constantly hitting me up. This is a very hot 21 year old girl. She looks way younger. Her personality is perfect for what I need in a relationship right now: cute, timid, shy but fiesty, she even looks like my favorite pornstar. And from the looks from it she really fell for me and wants me. My problem though is that I'm doing nofap and I fell into a flat zone. This PUA shizzle is pulling all of my strings. It didn't expect my PUA endeavors to work out so quickly. I'm also very busy with school and work this coming two weeks and I don't have time. I'm so sad and disappointed in life but guess what? It is all my own doing! To be fair I also have a lot of emotional baggage from the past but I'm an adult. I have to fix this or die trying. I'm really depressed right now but this clip always cheers me up:

From the last post I notice that I can be very negative towards myself. There were also some good stuff like I can execute very well, I can shrug off rejection like it is nothing. Pickup is really an internal game. An inner jihad. It is all in the mind. Too many dudes focus on external variables. I need to focus on building confident and attraction. At one hand you need to pull (through passive attraction) and push (through confidence) Julien explains it nicely

Today I didn't want to do approaches but I forced myself to do some. I approached some real hotties and I got blown off. My energy and confidence was way off. These were my problems Expecting something for nothing Being angry at hot girls for not accepting a weak weasel that I was. It is really stupid when I think about it. Being angry at hot girls for like only confident men is like being angry guys for liking tits and ass Not being in my own power, giving my power away. Too much micro managing and thinking about what to say. What to say is really a cherry on top of the cake. Being anal about the cherries while the cake sucks is really dumb. Also I'm having a lot of inner conflicts during approach: conflict between letting things be versus doing. I got one nice conversation and I got all needy and bitchy. It wasn't a good day for acquiring new girls. Also I'm busy with some other stuff and I just don't feel good. Nonetheless, I got some lessons and insights from today. I don't care about results too much since that blonde girl that texts me all the time.

Mindfulness is great for pickup and relationships. Today I noticed a shift in myself in terms of relationships. In the past when I would love or like somebody I would cling. Now I love or like them and let it go. If it is ment to be, she will return to me, and recently I discovered that is the way to attract girls and make them "yours" through emotional connection. It is really about trust in yourself, letting emotions manifest, having principles and values, letting go of fear and letting go in general and being in truth.

Two days ago my grand mother died. Death is real in the relative sense. It made me think about stuff and about life and what I want to get done. I'm done with this woo-woo stuff for the coming weeks. I will try to meditate on the regular though.

Next week I will be starting to take psychedelics again after 3 months of intense self-development in the field of psychology. This thread has the purpose to track my development. I will be focusing on healing and enlightenment.

I noticed that I'm looking different to actualized org after suicide of SoonHei and the whole ordeal by Conner Murphy. These happenings revealed spiral dynamics deep stage orange of this forum. There is a lot of selfishness that I was afraid of. I dropped those feelings of guilt of caring about myself. Everybody pursues his own interests, so will I.

So to stop one-itis I did some approaches today. I noticed I totally lost my MOJO in terms of flow, train of thoughts, orientation but in terms of emotionality I was on par. I really need some trust in myself, understand I'm a human, machine and use my biological energy based brain and body the right way. I thought I was good but with just like everything else when you don't use it you lose it. It seems pickup and short term memory and reflex are closely linked.

I have no contact with my mother after years and years of emotional and physical abuse. I'm done with her and her abusive family but my grandmother's death makes me confront old shit again. One part of me wants to be nice and do the right thing and another part of me wants to stay close to myself: I'm not going back while I cut them out of my life. Going to the funeral will feel like stabbing myself in the back. I don't want to betray myself. I don't want to be nice at the expense of pleasing my nephews and nieches. I really don't care about my mother and her family but I do care about my nephews and nieches so I'm in a split. If I don't go my nephews and nieches will be angry at me. Perhaps not even want to see me but I doubt that. If I go, I will have to betray myself. I was on the blink of suicide thanks to my mother so I don't care about her. Also I don't want to see my mother and to play a role when I don't care.

I'm going to stop lying to myself. I totally fell in love with her. ?

My relationship with my little brother is also bad. Yes. Thanks. I will think about it for couple of hours but they didn't respect me when I was alive and they were alive. Why would I respect them now? They don't have that kind of service there. Hm, interesting points. But do I really have to visit the funeral to forgive them? I can forgive them and still not visit the funeral in my opinion. You might have a point about not wanting to confront a part of myself by going there. I will have to work on that nonetheless, whether I go or not.

In my culture that would be seen as an insult. I have to stay for 1 day or not go at all. No.