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About GGG

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  1. I need some advice. I've been feeling really stuck and unhappy lately. I hate almost everything about my life. I feel a strong urge to do something but I have no idea what exactly. I tried to do various things to make change happen but nothing is working - short period of therapy, new job, going out trying to meet women. I hate people, I resent women, I have no interest in anything anymore. I feel like I am unable to express myself. I do plan to move somewhere soon to get away from some of the toxicity around me, but this is unlikely to solve the root issues. I just feel this urge that I cannot explain. What am I supposed to do? What do I want? How do I get what I want? I don't know which direction to go. Should I go through the L.P. course again? I thought some more money would solve the problem and it kinda did - I have slightly less financial stress right now, but it seems it will always be there. I thought therapy would help me deal with family issues and it slightly did, but I am still having major problems. I have no idea who to turn to, who to trust. The couple of therapists I tried to go to for help seemed to be mostly useless and I feel that therapy is not going to be the solution, based on the two different ones that I saw. I just can't get over this feeling. It is a feeling of hate/anger/deep dissatisfaction in my life, like I am stuck or unable to let something out. People around me piss me off. I look at them and I just want everyone to stay the f*ck away from me. I want everyone to leave me alone (except maybe some slutty women who are offering easy sex). I feel that, in the past several years, the various people that I've let into my life are all garbage - I guess you attract what you are... Is this depression? if so, I think depression is bullsh*t. I think I just lack quality connections in my life. I have no friends. Most people around me seem shallow to me and I fail to see any potential in attempting to have a relationship with the swine that is humanity. I think I am lonely though... I am so lonely sometimes. I feel heartbroken. I feel like no one cares about me. No one wants to hug me and be with me. Sometimes I start to think that I am ugly and that this is the whole problem. Sometimes I really hate myself and hate my life. I never feel complete/whole, there is always something wrong with me and my situation, no matter what I do. I have so many problems that I need to attend to that it is overwhelming. I am working too much. I don't take care of myself anymore. I think that loneliness is not the issue, but other times I think that it is. I'm struggling with focus, sleep, consistency in anything. I feel like a piece of sh*t. I can't explain it. I feel like I am surrounded by negativity everywhere I look, like the world is against me and wants me to fail. I feel like people feel this current vulnerability in me and, instead of helping, they want to further facilitate my demise and kick me while I am down, figuratively speaking. And on the rare occasions when someone tries to help me or offer some "love" I just push away and do not want it, or can't accept it. What is happening? What do I do?
  2. yeah, I think everything in my life is pointing to moving. It is just so cheap to live where I live, I will have to pay more money, but I guess the piece of mind is worth it. This place and neighborhood has taken a toll on my mental health... Thanks for reading/writing. I feel better.
  3. I don't think its the noise. I just don't like living where I live right now, and I have been thinking about moving for a while. Recently, I had a phone conversation with a life coach who was trying to sell me his services, and after that call I went and made the complaint. I think that he had some kind of effect on me. As far as having sex for him to hear, I just feel too disgusted by the idea. Does that make me beta?
  4. I need to vent somewhere. I hate the person I share a full wall with. I hate to hear him there. After a while of living next to him, I complained about noise but it wasn't just the noise, it was the whole person. This led to a confrontation with the neighor and now I hate him even more. I want to move but it is just such a pain in the a** to deal with all of that. I am busy with other things in my life and the rent is cheap. I feel trapped living next to this guy though. He is nosy and I feel a lack of privacy. For example, I don't want to bring females to my place and have him listen in and probably jerk off. I also feel like I will have lost the battle if I move (my ego is involved now). He got under my skin after our interaction about the noise complaint and now I feel even more disgusted. I have no idea who to talk to about this and how to get past this feeling of disgust and resolve all of this. I don't know where to move. I've been wanting to move to another city and I was about to move to a different place a month ago, but it didn't work out. I hate this situation... I can't focus or think clearly right now. How do I deal with this?
  5. @Michael569 Today Bfast: fried eggs with veggies; banana, OJ (oj has sugar will replace for something else like tea with honey) Lunch: veg soup Dinner: White rice (will need to change to brown or cauliflower rice or something), beef, and tomato salad. Plan is to just do low carb veggies, meat, eggs, fruits, nuts, etc
  6. Seems that Low Carb Diet and exercise should do the trick. I went to Whole Foods and cooked up a veg soup for lunch (kinda like Leo's video) - Key is to use a good herb mix for veg soup so that it has decent flavor. I do eat lots of carbs like mac and cheese, mashed potatoes, and white rice all the time. It will be a transition to veggies, fruits, meat and eggs only (+other low carb). The pandemic facilitated a slow slip into soda drinking and eating out/delivery, which will stop now. This is a good list: Went to the gym very early morning hoping to avoid gym bros, but no, they were there grunting and puffing (ugh...)
  8. @Snader @Leo Gura Are white rice, pasta and potatoes unhealthy? Should I switch to gross brown rice, sweet potatoes, and whole wheat pasta?
  9. In the past several years I have gained 15-20 pounds. I knew that it was happening but never got to taking care of this issue - no exercise is mostly the cause of it, I think. Now I am at the highest weight I've ever been. I look worse and feel worse. I have never had a weight problem so this is new for me. How do people lose weight? I signed up for a gym membership. My diet is not that bad, but I guess I will be trying to stay away from processed foods like hot dogs. Does anyone have advice on what is most effective? I am not sure of what to do.
  10. @aurum I'm curious - what do you mean by inner work, what does that entail? Are you just referring to things like reading books, meditating, being in nature etc., or is there something specific that you recommend?
  11. How did you reach 1 million subs? What can I do to achieve the same?
  12. work smart, not hard.