Dylan Page

I’m not sure whether I can definitively know if other people have an inner experience. I understand that fundamentally there is no inner experience and that it’s all part of consciousness, but I guess I still don’t understand how I should think about other people. Do they also have a perspective or not? What are the implications?

@Inliytened1 I liked the video, thank you, calmed down some anxiety I had. Solipsism is a scary belief to hold.

Do people that have bad things happen to them sort of “have it coming”? Like if someone seemingly randomly gets cancer, did they “deserve” it? Is it for something? I’m trying to find a justification for the existence of suffering given that the universe is absolute love.

All of my friends are busy, I have little to no online friends and most other people seem unappealing to interact with. I don’t really understand why, but I feel bored and confused. I don’t know what to do and I feel like I’m kind of just existing. It’s not necessarily bad, it just feels kind of bland and pointless. I don’t know what to think or how to move forward. I guess just wait for something interesting to happen?

I also get this sense of of a lack of context. I’m not involved in anything. I’m just kind of in an environment with no connections and things happening. Just standing here watching the world go by.

So yesterday I watched Love Death and Robots and the episode San Junipero of Black Mirror (which is a show that has the same unrelated episode like theme similar to love death and robots). After all of these episodes, I started getting this weird psychosis and reality felt like I could just peel it away, or as if I was going to just pop out of existence at any moment. This is with no drugs whatsoever involved. I felt like I had taken a psychedelic when I had not. I then went home (I was with friends) and could not fall asleep until like 5 am (Was midnight when I left). I was so tired but could not sleep because of how anxious I was. Finally at 5 am I puked my guts out and was able to calm down. Is this reaction fuckin normal.. like what? It was fucking awful.

So, someone slowly manipulated me into giving them 700 dollars even though I told them I was in a financially vulnerable spot. I was helping him because he really needed it at the time and supposedly was dealing with home domestic problems. I never straight up gave him cash but I would occasionally buy him food, a cig here and there, and that kind of stuff. He said he was going to pay me back and then finally ended up ghosting me. He was so friendly, sincere sounding and genuine. I’ve never been scummed so hard in my life and have developed trust issues with many people in my life. I’m only 19 and have debt on top of this. I was just trying to be nice. I don’t know whether to be mad, or understanding that he probably wanted to get away from home and the only way he could do it was by stealing from me. Overall, I’m just kind of left contemplating this and don’t know how to react.

@LfcCharlie4 Yeah bro, definitely gonna take some time to cool off and just let the feelings pass. I’ve become a stronger person, and in some kind of way, value this experience.

@Leo Gura I definitely feel like a stronger person after this. Less naive and more realistic. I’m used to everyone being kind and trustworthy to a reasonable extent. I now realize I’ve been living under a rock.

@Leo Gura so why survive if survival is miserable?

I want to know, when you die, does your life come full circle? Will it have been worth riding out? What will I think? Do all people eventually reach the same conclusion about it? Is that conclusion a pleasant one? Will it all be okay?

@Inliytened1 I mean I just know that there are some people that absolutely hate cancer, and have died hating it. Everyone at some point in their life has classified their situation as “miserable”, or at least I and many others have. I can confidently say that there was a point in my life where I was living in pretty much hell, and I want to know why something like that could exist. I could have easily done without it, and didn’t learn much other than the world can be a pretty shit place.

@Inliytened1 I mean, when I stub my toe, it’s pretty miserable, regardless of whether it’s in my mind or not, idk what you are saying.

So does that mean that all realities exist? Including the really miserable ones? @Leo Gura Obviously from the perspective of the ego but.. contrary to what many people seem to assume, the perspective of the ego is really the only important part while the ego is alive.

@Leo Gura 1. True 2. Why?

Idk, I don’t understand why life has to be that shitty for that many people, they never asked to be born, why does the universe give some random guy with a full life ahead of him cancer at 26? Just seems so stupid. (and I know that this post seems somewhat unrelated to what we were talking about, but one of the biggest bones I have to pick with the universe is how it can mercilessly bend people over with no reparations. It just seems like bullshit.) @Leo Gura

So in the end, everyone gets what they want? @Leo Gura

@Leo Gura why does it have to be that way? What kind of reality is that..

What’s the point of meaning? What does it do?

@Leo Gura Hitler can exist without infinite love... It could be the case that there is no love at all, and that the actual case is that reality is indifferent and “allows” everything, which is to say that reality doesn’t actually “allow” anything, it just is the way it is, and it makes no distinction in between good and evil at all, not just because it loves everything, but because it is just simply that way by necessity. Love could be just an idea and not fundamental. But I guess it depends what you mean by love.

Leo, after discovering the truth, do you still experience existential terror? Are you unsatisfied with the answer? Are you still searching for something more?

The question is pretty much in the title but, in short, is life a good thing? At some sort of fundamental level.

The nature of infinity is that it’s endless, duh. But, similarly to trying to find the boundary of reality, the closer and closer you get to love, the farther and farther love gets from you. “God’s Plan” if you will, is to maximize love. How is this possible if you can never reach the end? If God is infinitely powerful, you would think that he could have maximized love instantly. But, if love is infinite, God can never maximize it, because its impossible. Maybe this is logical bullshit but I’d like some feedback.

The consensus about meaning is that is either doesn’t exist, exists in some kind of illusory way, and/or is generally a bad thing relative to “being”. Desire is walks people around like dogs and creates suffering. But then also Leo has a life purpose course. I’m kinda confused. What should I do with my life? Literally nothing or have an LP or hedonism or what? The answer of “whatever you want” is also not going to make sense because A) I don’t know what I want. And B) desire = suffering

@Leo Gura Wat lol