Kore

Why do they say that 'communication' (tarot, ouji boards etc.) opens the door? Because communication is tied to imagination, creation and manifestation. The throat chakra (sound and vibration for the great pyramids etc. ) plays a role in imagination, creation and manifestation. Creativity. High notes - yes Low notes - no Loud - yes Quiet - no Light - yes Darkness - no Hot - yes Cold - no Red, Green, white - yes Black, blue, yellow - no Tapping - yes If you affirm or force 'yes' with your desire you can 'create' with the power of communication. If you combine the heart chakra or love with the throat chakra or communication with your desire then that it is an especially powerful combination.

You can lift the frequency by expressing the colours. Through tapping, visualization etc. The colour order (in terms of frequency and positivity/ development): Black Red Blue Green Yellow Purple Orange White - the highest (very interesting that spiral dynamics is similar to this order) White magick - hand gestures especially Dhyana or Vitarka, clicking your fingers. Utilizing the colour white, red or green. Affirming until everything is white, red or green in agreeance or forcing your will. I've manifested things this way. With the power of imagination and communication. I believe communication may be tied to creation and manifestation.

The colours keep the door open. Strong 'pretend' that the colours are sending me messages and I'm generating them. Along with shapes and forms. It's all intuition, communication. I can see in real time how imagination and pretend crack the door open. It feels like madness but its powerful. People would treat me differently; we are one. Truth takes over, infused with fantasy (and its pleasant fantasy/siddhis). Constant synchronicity. The colours really feel real even though they're 'not'. My lack of logical left brain and my belief in the reality of imagination. What is real and what is imagination? Everything is imagination. With enough momentum 'imagination' is real. Real is imagination and feeling plus momentum. The door is opened. Everything comes flowing in. Shadows to be loved and held. Things 'stand out' (intuition and communication). Dreams come true. Open the wardrobe with a cleansed being or heart, fluidity and flexible state of being. I am beyond time. I am Eve. I am the first and the last. Alpha and Omega. Time does not exist in that world when the door opens entirely. I can talk to the mirror/ myself at any point in time.

Notes: To open the door: Use imagination/pretend/fantasy/mirage/madness/illusion. Heart and sexual energy. Relationship and intimacy. Fantasy is key. Blossoms. Creates Siddhis. Bring him back through imagination. Give (scripting, affirmations, prayers etc.). Recieve. Relationship and intimacy with the universe. Oracles, cards. Positive cause. Crystals, cards, any kind of permission slip to recieve. Write - look for response or reaction. Look for impact. Care about the collective. Let go of the left brain. Logical brain. Enjoy. Imagination/pretend + heart. Doorway between material and siddhis is imagination or pretend. Molding reality. Mold reality with pretend. The doorway to the entities/the mirror is pretending they are there. Heart makes it stable. Fantasize CHAKRAS ARE REAL. lol. (They are) Third eye = imagination or pretend. Heart is the threshhold. Expectation. Create a lot of meaning so as to sow expectation. Pretend will stabilize and weave a story. Comes to life. Enjoy playing pretend. Enjoyment is key. Follow the blur between reality and pretend. To open the door: Sexual energy Affirmations Relaxation, meditation, breathwork Repeat pretend/imagination to bring it through the door. If it can destroy me, it can heal me. Chakras. Closing the door - seeing it as only imagination or pretend or fantasy or mirage or illusion or madness. No heart, no sexual energy.

Jinn in my house. I asked them what they want. They said "You". They pounded me a few days ago in the astral. There was the smell of blood and sulfar. I don't know what they want except to scare me away. They don't want me to keep the door open with the colours (a form of communication I use). I know their personality. I've gotten to know them in the last few months in the 'mirror'. I liken them more to Jinn in Islam than Demons. Ancient, beautiful but frightening creatures. They took me down easily. Murdered me. "Teach nicolas" said the board. He's in prison for life for murder. Reflections in the multifaceted diamond.

They were here the whole time. Sexual energy woke me up to them. I just have to wake myself up again.

Now I'm not so sure if it's a case of mastery or a case of grace. Friendship with the self and good deeds not left unsupported. It may be a combination of the self fascinated by the self and of grace however. I'm still exploring the mystery.

I would like to keep track of my habits and goals in this journal like reading, exercise, and meditation.

Vision (before entering): 1. Master eckhart's portals (replacement) 2. Master human realm (identification) 3. Treated PMDD - experience the fruits of that 4. Master Peak and Valleys (enlightenment work during valley) 5. Master relationships (identification) 6. Master law of attraction

Who says journals with public accountability aren't useful? I've already hammered out two major goals on my path within a week. Plus I get the added bonus of resolving trauma through writing. Resolve PMDD and attain stability (tick) Write a letter to psych (tick) I'll send that letter to my psych (reworded) with a plea for full autonomy and intro.

The old world is falling away but is still largely present. I have a lot of momentum backing the old world. My relationships are improving. My personality and yang energy is still present but it is balanced with yin and I am happier overall. When the yang is constant it is grating. My unhappiness sends out negative energy that creates negative attraction which is especially obvious with my 'disorder' which influences reality.

The duality of the tortoise and the hare: "Part of your life is just gonna be looping and holding onto what you're already doing. But then part of your life should be exposure. It should be like a turtle coming out of its shell, reaching its arms and head out of its shell, wanting to explore the world. It's that's duality between hunkering down and opening up." The order was the universe forcing me to become the turtle, hunkering down, mastering stability. I have tendency to be the hare, exploring everything. I need to lean toward the turtle in my endeavours. Slow, steady, stable.

I went to the doctor today and got Yaz (US FDA approved birth control pill for PMDD). I can say that it is a success. Things I've noticed from yaz (during pms): - beautiful 'energies' - satisfaction - warm feelings and thoughts - no dark feelings and thoughts, or they don't stick or get out of control - no anger - everything is vibrant, alive and peaceful - adjustment period - processing, healing, healthy sadness and pain - mindful suffering - higher pain tolerance level - There's two worlds. The PMS and the yaz. The yaz is a beautiful world. The PMS is an ugly world. Mostly there's just yaz. The PMS is old momentum. The yaz world is the now reality. The PMS world is old news. It is passing away.

The Tortoise (a sign I see frequently): 1. Stability 2. Medication 3. Slow and steady wins the race 4. Part of The triad: Medication, stability, and giftedness 5. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs 6. Wait 7. Find a cure for PMDD 8. Menopause. Old age. Hekate. 9. Stability = no PMDD 10. Opposite: Going fast. The hare. The fool = prioritizing giftedness, not stability and medication in the triad. 11. Wisdom 12. Patience

I think this is the missing piece in my path. Improving my cycles is directly tied to the stability I need when it comes to my disorder. My condition would worsen off medication during pms tremendously and then improve drastically during non-pms. It's like being thrown around like a ragdoll by your hormones. There was no stability. I think birth control or simply being mindful of practices that could assist me in improving PMDD could be the missing piece in my stability. I have to look at the areas in my life that are weak and lacking already on the medication before I even think about going off my medication and entering any realm. PMDD is my weakest area. And either I'm going to cure my PMDD or I'm going to be on medication until I'm in menopause when PMDD is no longer an issue.

Before entering the realms: - Stable accommodation - I have basic necessities, like phone, money, credit card, shoes, keys. - I have medication - I have a doctor that I trust - I have a solid support system - I don't leave the house to go explore everywhere. Inside is better. - I am possibly taking the pill (PMDD) - I am stable and well - I have a meditation practice - I utilise sexual energy and no pmo.

But I don't need a cure for me I don't need it No, I don't need a cure for me I don't need it No, I don't need a cure for me I don't like the tension, the misapprehensions About our nature in love The glorious teachers are no use for creatures Who knows how to play with the gods You got nerves, but they never show Unless they hurt, so you blamed it all On my love, the moving Heart I got But I don't need a cure for me I don't need it No, I don't need a cure for me I don't need it No, I don't need a cure for me I don't need it I don't need it Hm, please, no cure for me Please, no cure for me, cure for me Cure for me, please, no cure for me, cure for me Cure for me, please, no cure for me, cure for me, cure for me

Before re entering into those realms again which I inevitably will I want to make sure I am in a stable, positive, well and meditative place. That I am strong at my core. I'll need a solid meditation practice.

My treatment order is being removed this week. Not sure what to make of it. Inside I'm jumping up and down for joy and near ecstacy. The medication and order has limited my path. Although there is no way I'm entering back into those realms without medication again. It is a boon to my path, along with the doctors. Hospitals, not so much.

Note: I think I hit the wall of chronic fatigue because I prioritized action and productivity over my state of being. You want to find the Well of Youth and Well-being. There you will find your energy. If you prioritize productivity, you'll quickly run out of energy. So yeah, prioritize state of being (of calm and alert). Milk the vortex. Emotion goals/Emotional mastery.

Sometimes you have no choice but to sleep/nap it off. Then afterwards take it more slow.

Update: To offset 'the wall' of sleepiness from chronic fatigue the answer is to slow down, repeat alerting activities, and to stay in motion (action breeds alertness). Take general action ("Finished the task" in Norbu). Complete tasks around you that you see need to be done. Once the sleepiness has worn off than you can focus more so on state of being than on action.

Primary: 1.7/5 -- (a lack of empathy for other people and tolerance for antisocial orientations) Secondary: 2.7/5 -- (rule breaking and a lack of effort towards socially rewarded behavior)