krockerman

I as a man (who also has Aspergers) Have a hard time when it comes to two things in game: I was on a date a couple of days back and I just could not escalate or make things Sexual I am afraid to make girls uncomfortable or creep them out I feel like I also need a very clear sign that it is ok to touch and even then I feel uncomfortable When it comes to the metoo ways of looking at this clear verbal consent or if a girl is making the moves is the way to go when it comes to calibration of consent The other thing is persistence I have watched interviews girls that tell you that they have rejected men to test their determination to win them over I am a very sensitive guy but I am lacking the dating/sex life I want So my question is, how can you become conscious persistent without being disrespectful, creepy or rapey? And what should you do if you are not natrually socialy well calibrated when it comes to non verbal cues and making the move? @Leo Gura @Emerald

@Leo Gura How do you become consciously persistent when it comes to open/close? I have worked as a door to door salesman for about 6 months The biggest obstacle I had was according to my boss is that I was not pushy enough I loved everything about except when it came to being pushy I genuinely cared for my customers and even got an award for my quality However even If I care about making money because I could not be pushy at all unless I was in survival mode and had to make a sale Now when it comes to open/close I am very attentive but many PUAs like Julien and Todd have talked about plowing Basically to talk and be persistent until the girls hook Now what main principles can you follow to make sure that you are not harrasing the girl after you get token resistance? (It has happened many times in door to door sales that people tell right up front that they are not interested yet when you push beyond that, get to know them and starts to talk about the product they actually become interested)

I am 22 I already start to feel insecure about my age in cold approach Especially in daygame Some girls that I find attractive I fear that I am gonna be to old to approach My biggest fear is that I am gonna be persivced as a creep if I approach a girl that is too young And even talking about it In the context of hook ups/causal dating what at what age difference does it start to become immoral to have sex with a girl that is too young? I am attracted to 18 year olds but I have gotten alot of shame for that I live in sweden and even if we have a pretty damn low legal age of consent the Cultural age is a whole other thing It's painful to approach for this reason and this has been nagging me for years @Leo Gura what age difference do you think is appropriate for causal hoop ups and dating?

In this case it's matter of legality rather my conscience and self esteem

I am not attracted to 12 year olds

Ok, This is has been going way to long now I am tired of battling with this issue I work in sales, I love this job for many reasons. -Lots of social experience -Unlike a normal 9-5 it's more like a game than a job with every win = money -The reward that is Money My boss has praised my skill regards technical skills, knowledge etc Some days I have made great amount of money I work for sales company that sells products from the biggest Telecom company in Sweden called Telia It's a well known brand and belowed by many But I make mediocre results to due the fact that at the core I am a very soft and people pleasy guy I don't like to ask for the other multiple times even if 80% of all sales comes after the customer third no I try to be as genuine, kind and non pushy in my persistence as possible But it is hard in both the pitch (taking atleast 5 objections at the door) and at the close When a person open the door with good energy but then slams with bad energy it due to me being persistence (I am almost always very nice but may be annoying in terms of persistence) I want you all and @Leo Gura to answer this question conscious persistence Both in sales and in pick up What are the principles of good persistence? When should you take no for an answer? How do you persistence mindfully? I am a just people pleaser that needs to do more work or too conscious to rep the rewards of lower lever consciousness (stage orange wolf of wall street)? -My boss tells me my sales needs to go up -I am tired of just barely making 1800 dollars every month -I am tired to feeling stuck -I am tired of not getting any results in pick up I only blame myself for this

Hello, I am a 21 year old male, soon 22 I have been gaming for a while but got stagnated during covid And I have some minor inner issues in game Age Now this may come as a suprise but as a male I am the most attracted to mainly 18-21 year olds But even at my age I still feel have thougts while daygameing ”oo she is pretty but what if she is under 18” or ”Soon 18 is gonna be too young for me” etc even if I desire to game 18-year-olds to at least I am 30 This has fucked me up so bad that I can’t even bother daygameing more as the shame and the guilt keeps me stuck Second is touch/persitance I got traits of asperger symdrome, one on one in an normal environment it’s pretty clear how the other person feels But on the dancefloor this can be a nightmare, I have creeped out girls before, it’s not a pleasant feeling I wish I clould game without this problem Third is making sure that the girl has the right exepcations I am someone that does not desire a relationship in this phase at life at all. None I am worried that some girl may fall in love with me. I would hate it because I am such a people pleaser in my heart Haveing someone that wants to be with me more than casual dating would break me Now I hope that I can get some support from some kind souls on this forum that have gone through the same issues

A couple of days ago I was looking for material to understand spiral dynamics better, then I came across 2 videos that come with constructive criticism of the model and ken. What do you guys think? Ps skip to 2:30 on the spiral dynamics video

Non-Existence cannot exist per definition, what is left is Existence, Existence is a bi product of Non-Existence, (This is what I have found out, I may be wrong)

That’s not true, Being higher couscous means does not mean more Love and morality

Yes. Both sides are moralizing. I don’t think it is good that neither side does it. Anti-vaxxers protest and pro-vaxxers act morally superior/preaching to others. Then we have people that take the vaccine and don’t act superior because of it, and then we have other people who don’t take the vaccine without protesting in the streets. What I am trying to say is that you can think what you want about people who decides to not take it, but they still have the freedom for themselfs. If they chose to not take and die from covid instead, well that is the risk they take.

If you look at the history of anti biotics you will see that it was given to everyone for the smallest thing, the price of that was that now we are getting anti biotic resistant bacteria. Ok fine I was moralizing but what I am trying to tell you is that I know people who is gonna refuse the vaccine just because some of their family members was moralzing. Go around and moralize if you want but realize the counte-intuitive nature of it

I think people over 50-65+ should take it and people in risk groups. You should only use medicine when it is needed IMO. Otherwise, we run the risk of a backfire where the virus mutates into more dangerous forms. Covid is relatively harmless for young people. I don't see much reason why we should take it. But ofc everone has a right of making a choice of taking/not taking it as long as you don't go around moralizing to others about their decision.

I want you all to look at these areas and try to find how that stage tend view that area and what the healthy and unhealhty aspects each stage tend to have. Try to compare them -Happiness, fullfillment and meaning -Sex -Love and relationships -Life purpose -Family and children -Spirituality -Morality Example: Yellow tends finds meaning in solving problems in the world but fail to realize that happiness is not find within the mind. The way Blue tends to view sex has both good and bad aspects. It’s good for X reason but can be bad in some situations for Y reason Orange Tend to use rationality and logic as the base for the morality, while blue tends to lean towards authority in order to determine the moral code, orange way is better for X and Y but lacking regards to Z while blue is problematic for X and Y but is great regarding to Z

I want to start this off by saying that we will be looking I will be looking at this from both sides First of all, rape is probably one of the most disgusting acts of evil a man can ever commit, with that said: there is a deeper issue around the court system. I see many females posting an image on Instagram of how many rapists in society we have, how many get reported, how many go to court, and how many are put in jail. where are the men in jail are a huge minority compared to all the other rapist. It also states that falsely accused men are less than 1% The problem is you can never actually know that, It could be true but if you don't actually can prove it you can't post it as a fact. There has become a trend that makes it seem that so many men get away with rape. And that if you bring up the problem of false accusation you are branded as a rape apologist We have a court system for a reason. If you can't prove it then there is not much that can't be done Someone I know got falsely accused and even considered suicide a couple of years ago. They were sober, She never said no and they hung out after I have heard stories of a man that got accused of rape when he was in another country on the date the reported case happened. Ofc there is another side of rapist men who get away with rape due to the lack of evidence. My question will the issue of rape ever be solved because it's so hard to disprove. 9/10 women would probably never do this. But if we are gonna treat every man who rapes as a rapist then the number of false accusations will skyrocket and so many men's lives will be ruined. Then rape will start to be something that people are gonna take less seriously And what should we defy as rape? if a girl consent before and under sex but then regrets it should that be called rape? Where does the line go? I have had female friends of men who were pushy with sex and did psychological damage. But Leo has said that men should have a determined mindset and it's natural for women to have objections until sex Is it right to put 1 real rapist in jail and an innocent man? or let them both go where the rapist would harm two other women? What is the right thing? I hope we can have a constructive conversation about this issue

Leo has talked about that it is important to be a hard closer in dating. But How do you do that and at the same time while being repsectful And making sure she genuinely wants it? And when you are on the street/in the club it’s normal to have a bit of resistance at first. For many reasons, How do you keep persisting and at the same time being respectful to the woman?

@Leo Gura def needs to clarify this

I started this post on the Issue of How We can prevent false rape accusations Then you started blaming me and started to compare false accusation with real rape. And now you have said that you can’t compare them. You Don’t bring anything constructive to this post. I wanted to find a solution of How to solve the issue of false accusation. I never wanted any blame game. How Do you know? What is worse is relative. Stop being so absolutist

First of all that totally depends on the context. If a woman have sex beacuse of a pushy man that can be seen as rape. You are right that she got psycologial damage from that. I don't deny it. But a man who gets falsely accused may commit suicide like my friend. In this context who got the most damage? I don't understand. We talk about that all the time. If you talk about rape being a problem in our society is it fair for me to say "well murder, theft and violence are also a problem. Why do you talk about rape? how is rape any different?" Do you see the problem with that sort of rhetoric? I would instead talk with you about how to solve it rather than blaming you. I am not here to talk about if we should talk about but how to solve it. Talking about an issue doesn't solve it unless you present solutions.

That sounds like a great solution

ofc that almost happend to my friend. But on a big scale, more women are raped than men are falsely accused. But it still a problem that some men are falsely accused. However. What is worse depends on the context as you said. Both can be devastating. Relativity

I have to say with all my respect that I agree with you

Did we ever say that false rape is a bigger problem?

Yes. But there are some correlations. We are not here to discuss what is worse. Both are horrible